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Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Evil Willow posted:

I really, really hope OP sticks to his guns on this one!

AITA for accepting money from a friend's estate against the wishes of their family?

No you won't BTA. Tell them to take a long walk off a short pier during shark season- if they wanted more, they shouldn't have been such vile people to him. Reaping, sowing, ect.

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Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Isn't that the one where she continued the affair for another year after being caught, too?

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Maybe she shouldn't have hosed someone else! Both people can suck, here.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
It sure seems like it when people not only try to ignore that, but that she continued to see the other man for an entire year. I'm not inclined to give the cheater a whole lot of sympathy. The kid, yes- her, no.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
When that person has cheated on you and is in fact continuing to do so for the next year, correcting their delusion ain't high on your list of priorities.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

blatman posted:

ops husband is basically a dollar store inigo montoya knockoff
"Hello. My name is Ogini Ayotnom. You cheated on me. Prepare to cry."

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Am a security guard, can confirm. It's not even a tin badge, it's straight-up embroidered into the work shirts.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Someone should repost that one. That's a nice trip down memory lane.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
That receptionist needs to be lit on fire. HIPAA is incredi-loving-bly serious business, and that she broke it this quickly? No. No second chances. No explanations. Go right to the nukes.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Dishwashers are objectively better.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
What the gently caress have you brought upon this cursed land

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Aww, and I'd just made popcorn

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
How often do you wash your feet I think is more the issue. Not as often as your hands, I bet.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Chef Boyardeez Nuts posted:

Neat to see one of these go the other way

AITA for not letting my parents see my kids anymore?

AITA?
Drown the grandparents in a vat of soda.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Feed the inheritance thief feet-first into a woodchipper.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Cowslips Warren posted:


AITA for yelling at my fiance's son?

People who open other peoples' packages without permission should have their hands broken.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Motronic posted:

People owning/renting multiple properties for profit is a SYMPTOM, not a cause. You don't fix things by treating symptoms.
But screaming about it makes my pp the big pp therefore it is better than fixing the actual problem

I'm all for guillotining landlords but I'm in the same boat. I would literally be homeless if my family weren't renting. What is the proposed solution, *right now*, after guillotining said landlords? Y'all never think past Step 1.

E:

Hughlander posted:

AITA for screaming at my sister she's a "poisonous bitch?" and blaming the rest of my family for her behavior?


OP must be adopted because backbones are hereditary.
Holy poo poo that entire family needs to be lit on fire.

Malachite_Dragon fucked around with this message at 01:47 on Nov 13, 2021

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

DAD LOST MY IPOD posted:

People who advance these positions have usually thought them through! I know it’s fun to assume everyone you disagree with is an idiot proposing the stupidest version of their idea that you can imagine, but that’s not usually the case!

Counterpoint, the people smart enough to think these things through are almost certainly smart enough to not spend ten bucks to post on a forum that is both dead and gay.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Nebrilos posted:

How do you talk to someone who tunes you out and just asks "are you going to yell at me again?" every time you talk to them?
Through a divorce lawyer.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
If it were an actual phobia I highly doubt cold air would get a pass. Either get therapy or move to a desert.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Beachcomber posted:

I have bad news about desert nights for you.
I know about them, you know about them, a dollar says the girlfriend doesn't!

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
"I did consider decorum. I decided to ignore it. Also, gently caress you"

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Weren't there goons in the very last iteration of the thread trying to defend the whole "not showing the prices is ~fine dining~, you plebians :lofty:" bullshit?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for not having sympathy for my wife when my in laws found out my parents are still married?
No you are not the rear end in a top hat. Wife hosed around and found out. This is the consequences of her own drat actions.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
I would dearly love to help with the Thanksgiving preparation, but every time I try I get told to just go sit and wait. I'm not trying to get an early start on the deviled eggs Mom, you're in your fifties and your joints are shot to hell from thirty years of working in hospitals, let me help! I think she's too proud to admit she could use the help.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
No, see, they want him to already not be a virgin. Someone else can go through the awkwardness of the first time and teach him what goes where and how to find the little man in the boat, they don't want to. All of the fun, none of the effort.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Cowslips Warren posted:

On the flip side, when I worked at the zoo, we had a fairly new zebra group, and the male died; the new male brought in was young, and super excited to have a half dozen females. The females, however, were older and weren't going to take some random youth as their leader. Watching him try and fail to mount the females because they'd step away or he'd get up enough to spray all over the ground was the job an intern had, to mark down how many times he tried and failed.
"And what did you do for your job season this summer, Joshua?"
"I had to keep track of how many times an idiot zebra had premature ejaculation :geno:"

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Eide and carry on then are just powerfully stupid, please understand, they are dumb as rocks. Absolute morons, top tier dipshits. A sad, sad display of dumbassery.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Guildenstern Mother posted:

Ah yes, sexually active at 14, no chance that was scarring or traumatic and led to a hosed up sense of sexual boundaries.
Certainly according to carry on then!

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
But the TV told me the only thing that can stop a bad man with a gun is a good man with a gun! TV wouldn't lie to me!

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Cowslips Warren posted:

AITA for giving a bigoted jerk a taste of his own medicine?

Nope. Never. Dudes who throw rocks need to be able to dodge them just as well.

Stoop to their level and make them taste the curb. Violence, not rising above, is what bullies understand.
:emptyquote:
Turning the other cheek just gives them another target to hit. Break their loving fingers.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Wait, Mormons aren't allowed to drink coffee? Why not? Not trying to be mean about it, just the first time I've heard about that restriction, I think.
An ex of mine has a grandmother who did this exact thing to her, except it was a pet chicken. She's *very confused* as to why her daughters don't want her coming around to see her grandkids.

Edited, had the wrong religion, whoops

Malachite_Dragon fucked around with this message at 05:54 on Nov 22, 2021

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Whoops, I'm not sure how I managed to get Mormon and Muslim completely switched around. Apologies and edited!

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Now instead of the coil breaking due to heat expansion, the thermostat spontaneously destroys itself with a hammer every fortnight.

Mx. posted:

AITA for telling my brother and SIL “you got your big day now you have deal with the consequences”

oooof
https://i.imgur.com/THoMSJj.mp4
Eat a whole heaping bowl of poo poo, and face the consequences of your actions.

Malachite_Dragon fucked around with this message at 14:05 on Nov 23, 2021

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Beachcomber posted:

"If I tell you it won't count."

My dad did this for way too loving long, both for his actual birthday and for anniversaries. After the umpteenth time of reducing my mother almost to tears because what she got wasn't what he wanted, she told him in no uncertain terms to un-gently caress himself and either start giving a list, or get used to not getting anything at all. Now, we have a drat list to use.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
:cripes:
Well your doctors are loving idiots then

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Mx. posted:

AITA for quitting a family job without notice after I found out my dad was paying me less than my brother?

i think your dad shouldn't hire 13-year olds
I think they mean they were 18 at the time this happened.
Either way, NTA. Dad picked his side, he can suffer the consequences.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

PancakeTransmission posted:

Maybe because medical bills don't bankrupt us? :shrug:

Give it time, Boris is workin' on it.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic
Seagulls just aren't the same, I assume.

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

pentyne posted:

That's good. The thread basically ended with a "gently caress I have no idea how to stop him" after like his third near death hospital visit from shoving dirty plastic into his dick and he was refusing to ever admit to anything.

Don't forget the one weird-rear end goon who came crashing into the thread to project their own issues onto things like a loving lighthouse. A teenage boy doesn't want to admit what he's doing because talking to your family about masturbation-adjacent things is weird as gently caress as an adult, nevermind while still a dumb kid? NO! HE MUST BE A PATHOLOGICAL LIAR! BELIEVE NOTHING HE SAYS EVER

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Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

thotsky posted:

Is this just someone who want to share their story and AITA is a really popular subreddit or something? How could they possibly be the rear end in a top hat?
:decorum: poisoning comes in many forms, in this case the form of "did I go too far by actually doing something about a developing Really loving Bad Situation instead of just thinking it was none of my business?"

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