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i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"
so far i've found this to be the most consistent:

~ 2 oz basil haydens that gets to be increasingly more as i get drunk
two dashes angostura bitters
one tsp sugar muddled with 1/2 tsp water and a maraschino cherry all smushed up on the bottom

please post your recipes im on a quest to make the best

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i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"
also i didnt mean for the gents icon to be uninclusive it was just the most 1806 icon i could find

Brother Tadger
Feb 15, 2012

I'm accidentally a suicide bomber!

i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"

i asked for recipes can you tell me what randy is drinking here

Semi-Protato
Sep 11, 2001



I'm from Wisconsin and we are all drunks, so we add some extra poo poo to our Old Fashioneds so you can drink a bunch of these and not be drinking straight booze all day like some kind of alcoholic. Here's my recipe for a Wisconsin Old Fashioned, aw jeez guy do ya want one er no

Put about a tsp of sugar in the bottom of a rocks glass, dash in a few dashes of bitters, drop in a cherry and an orange slice.
Muddle everything up good except the orange rind. If you did it right the sugar should be just about dissolved.
Grab your bottle of Korbel brandy and pour in a good couple of glugs. Should be about 2 oz but if it's a little more who cares, it's either too cold or too hot to do anything other than drink here.
Fill your glass up with ice cubes.
Now's when things get funky because you have a choice. You can make your Old Fashioned sweet, sour, or press.
- For sweet, top off the drink with 7up. Garnish with another cherry or two and an orange slice skewered on a tiny plastic sword.
- For press, top off with club soda or plain seltzer water. Garnish with a couple two-three olives skewered on a tiny plastic sword.
- For sour, you chose wrong. Pick one of the other two options you weirdo.
Stir and enjoy.

Repeat until morning, because if you're drinking before noon you have a problem - Bloody Marys are ok though. Or if it's game day.

grill youre saelf
Jan 22, 2006

Semi-Protato posted:

I'm from Wisconsin and we are all drunks, so we add some extra poo poo to our Old Fashioneds so you can drink a bunch of these and not be drinking straight booze all day like some kind of alcoholic. Here's my recipe for a Wisconsin Old Fashioned, aw jeez guy do ya want one er no

Put about a tsp of sugar in the bottom of a rocks glass, dash in a few dashes of bitters, drop in a cherry and an orange slice.
Muddle everything up good except the orange rind. If you did it right the sugar should be just about dissolved.
Grab your bottle of Korbel brandy and pour in a good couple of glugs. Should be about 2 oz but if it's a little more who cares, it's either too cold or too hot to do anything other than drink here.
Fill your glass up with ice cubes.
Now's when things get funky because you have a choice. You can make your Old Fashioned sweet, sour, or press.
- For sweet, top off the drink with 7up. Garnish with another cherry or two and an orange slice skewered on a tiny plastic sword.
- For press, top off with club soda or plain seltzer water. Garnish with a couple two-three olives skewered on a tiny plastic sword.
- For sour, you chose wrong. Pick one of the other two options you weirdo.
Stir and enjoy.

Repeat until morning, because if you're drinking before noon you have a problem - Bloody Marys are ok though. Or if it's game day.

As a wisconsinite, I was nodding my head solemnly in agreement until your absolute wrong opinion concerning sour. Throw the sweet poo poo in the trash

i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"
one of my favorite bars does a Wisconsin old fashioned that involves apple brandy so I’ll allow all this but it also seems uncivilized

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag

i am a moron posted:

so far i've found this to be the most consistent:

~ 2 oz basil haydens that gets to be increasingly more as i get drunk
two dashes angostura bitters
one tsp sugar muddled with 1/2 tsp water and a maraschino cherry all smushed up on the bottom

please post your recipes im on a quest to make the best

If I’m gonna have several it’s your recipe without the water. Maybe a thin slice of orange or at least just the peel. I use a sugar cube just because I think it’s neat. Top with a splash of club soda.

If I don’t care about getting blasted or I want something a little more refined I go old school with just a sugar cube, couple dashes of bitters, muddle, ice, and fill with Woodford or Basil. Twist an orange peel and drop it in.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
Also I like angostura so I may use three or even FOUR dashes if I’m feeling spicy

Flowers for QAnon
May 20, 2019

I rub orange bitters around the rim/glass first and also use a splash of luxardo instead of sugar.

Empty Sandwich
Apr 22, 2008

goatse mugs
simple syrup instead so I don't have to fuddle with the muddle

and Evan Williams (the luxury discount bourbon)

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy
op you didn't mention orange peel? wtf. fail.

Buce
Dec 23, 2005

a good, old-fashioned kick in the nuts.

ReidRansom
Oct 25, 2004


BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Also I like angostura so I may use three or even FOUR dashes if I’m feeling spicy

If you like angostura, try a trinidad sour. Underrated cocktail.

MEIN RAVEN
Oct 7, 2008

Gutentag Mein Raven

Oh hey! And old fashioneds thread! We wanted to try making our own maraschino cherries this year, so naturally we moved on to old fashioneds as a result. We're using a pretty cheap whiskey and I'm throwing in a small bit of sugar and a dash of orleans bitters because it's about all we have. We also made some lavender simple syrup yesterday and I tried that in place of the sugar. It's a bit floral but still drat good.

I'm basically a bit of a lush though and I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't just down whatever whiskey drink is in front of me.

The Fattest PI
Mar 4, 2008
I enjoy old fashioneds.

I ordered one from an Earls the other day (pricier but still poo poo chain restaurant) and I dunno who was making it but there was like an ounce of fuckin bitters in there. You just need a little splash!

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

a negroni, op

actually no your recipe does sound pretty good. i think striving for breadth in your old fashioned experience is a good goal, because the idea of having One Perfect Recipe that always hits the right spots is a bit of a strange one. by trying many types you increase the chance of being able to work out what you fancy most at any given moment

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag

Buce posted:

a good, old-fashioned kick in the nuts.

:hmmyes:

i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"

The Walrus posted:

op you didn't mention orange peel? wtf. fail.

I usually assume I’m not going to enjoy the old fashioned if I see one. All the worst old fashioneds I’ve ever had featured an orange peel. Also almost all in the south

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER
i like getting on all fours, real oiled up and getting milked from the back

any buds feel the same way, into model trains?

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


A Manhattan is better OP. It's basically the same just with Vermouth instead of the sugar. Also pointless to muddle a flavorless cherry, just put that poo poo on a spear and pop it in your mouth.

sporkstand
Jun 15, 2021
Don't use Fee brothers bitters...unless you're really into cinnamon.

i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"
i got one of these for a birthday or something a year ago:

https://foghatsmoker.com/

just used it for the first time. I might need different smoker chips I’ve had better than this. Not sure a smoked old fashioned is really going to be the best anyways

i am a moron fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Jul 20, 2022

Nefarious 2.0
Apr 22, 2008

Offense is overrated anyway.

pour whiskey into glass

Billy Ray Blowjob
Nov 30, 2011

by Pragmatica
Its The Swankys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FC-gP7zcF-k

Fucking Moron
Jan 9, 2009

i am a moron posted:

so far i've found this to be the most consistent:

~ 2 oz basil haydens that gets to be increasingly more as i get drunk
two dashes angostura bitters
one tsp sugar muddled with 1/2 tsp water and a maraschino cherry all smushed up on the bottom

please post your recipes im on a quest to make the best

Nothing to add except I like your username.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag

sporkstand posted:

Don't use Fee brothers bitters...unless you're really into cinnamon.

I tried these for the first time last weekend.

I didn’t hate it in a sweet old fashioned. If you’re going the dry route stick with angostura.

Billy Ray Blowjob
Nov 30, 2011

by Pragmatica
Skip the bitters and sugar and just add dash of good Chinoto

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
Squirt bitters in your mouth then chug bourbon out the bottle

Billy Ray Blowjob
Nov 30, 2011

by Pragmatica
Protip: Make your own Chinoto syrup

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



I've been mixing it up and drinking gin and tonic to prepare for the return of malaria to the US southeast this summer

i am a moron
Nov 12, 2020

"I think if there’s one thing we can all agree on it’s that Penn State and Michigan both suck and are garbage and it’s hilarious Michigan fans are freaking out thinking this is their natty window when they can’t even beat a B12 team in the playoffs lmao"
Drinking gin is a sign of degeneracy and psychopathy

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



i am a moron posted:

Drinking gin is a sign of degeneracy and psychopathy

Maybe. But at least I won't get malaria

Treecko
Apr 23, 2008

The Official Demon Girl
Boss of 2022!
I thought the best old fashioned was the hand job OPs mom gave to all the posters here

NC Wyeth Death Cult
Dec 30, 2005

He lost his life in Chadds Ford, he was dancing with a train.
I asked the waiter at Clancy's in New Orleans if their bartender made a good Old Fashioned and he got right in my stupid, vapid little Northern face and said to me, "he makes several hundred a night, sir" and so I ordered one. It was really good and I got to hear a guy who helped author or was a consultant on the Brady Bill talk about it to a bunch of people at the table next to me, which was nice.

There is no recipe online but I think it went a little like this (say this in Jack Nicholson's voice).

Materials

2 ounces Bourbon
1/4 to 1/2 ounce Simple Syrup
4 to 5 dashes of Peychaud Bitters
2 dashes Orange Bitters
1 Cocktail Cherry

Instructions

Add all ingredients to a rocks glass.
Stir to mix.
Add a large ice cube or several small cubes.
Stir gently to chill just a bit.
Serve.

Vidmaster
Oct 26, 2002



A little sugar and a few dashes of angostura bitters in the bottom of the glass, top with a heavy pour of bourbon and a big-rear end ice cube. Give it a good stir. Express an orange peel over the top and wipe it around the rim. Garnish with the peel and a Luxardo cherry.

Combo
Aug 19, 2003



There's a restaurant near me that uses smoked maple syrup rather than muddling sugar. It's really sweet but a nice twist on an old fashioned, so I picked up exactly what they use.

Tippleman's Barrel Smoked Maple Syrup if you want to look it up.

2 oz Rye Whiskey
1/4 – 1/2 oz Tippleman’s Smoked Maple
2 dashes orange bitters

sporkstand
Jun 15, 2021

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Squirt bitters in your mouth then chug bourbon out the bottle

Its this

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

William Henry Hairytaint once made an old fashioned for me but when I tasted it it was just Big Red and vodka

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Whooping Crabs
Apr 13, 2010

Sorry for the derail but I fuckin love me some racoons

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Squirt bitters in your mouth

Ftfy, love me some bitters

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