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Cacator posted:If I keep rubbing, a genie will come out. Extra funny if a genie does come out and starts jackin' his own schlong, creating a circle jerk it'd be just rude for the wank interrupter to not join in with.
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Apr 27, 2023 14:43
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wasn't me
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Apr 27, 2023 14:44
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"I'm not masturbating! I'm not masturbating!" I insist as I slowly shrink and transform into a corncob
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Apr 27, 2023 14:46
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No please don’t laugh at my micropenis haha that would make me feel so ashamed haha please don’t do it haha
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Apr 27, 2023 14:56
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Zybourne Clock posted:Isometric exercise. Care to join me? Why is there smoke coming out of your trousers, Zybourne?
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Apr 27, 2023 14:59
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There were horny milfs in my area.
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Apr 27, 2023 15:14
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You Are A Elf posted:Why is there smoke coming out of your trousers, Zybourne? No, mother, that's just the northern lights.
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Apr 27, 2023 15:20
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I actually have a family history of prostate cancer and it's important for me to monitor my ph levels with this cancer-scope medical device.
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Apr 28, 2023 04:07
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Oh god drat it I was livestreaming, someones gotta pay the bills around here
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Apr 28, 2023 04:16
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Oh, this is my penis? Oops.
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Apr 28, 2023 04:21
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kntfkr posted:wasn't me Your avatar tells otherwise.
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Apr 28, 2023 04:24
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snoo pingas usual I see
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Apr 28, 2023 04:42
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I was thinking about ur dad again
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Apr 28, 2023 04:43
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I was horny
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Apr 28, 2023 05:55
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I wanted to jerk off enough to go blind so I never have to look at you again.
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Apr 28, 2023 06:00
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I'm trying to stretch out my foreskin really really long so I can become a donor for dudes who got circumcized
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Apr 28, 2023 06:08
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Oh, hey, you caught me while I was applying my penis beauty cream
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Apr 28, 2023 06:14
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Bright Bart posted:I was told I'd get $10,000 if I reached orgasm without stopping or being interpupted.
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Apr 28, 2023 06:19
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i like nice words
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This is just a very intricate prosthesis I'm testing out for a new independent film I'm helping with
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Apr 28, 2023 06:20
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My hairy palms and blindsess make it too hard to jerk off these days
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Apr 28, 2023 06:20
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hey buddy I don't come to your place of business and slap the stock portfolio out of your hand while you're trying to work so you gonna just stand there and stare or are we Makin apple sauce here
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Apr 28, 2023 06:42
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I'm gay
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Apr 28, 2023 06:43
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A fly landed on the tip of my penis and I'm trying to smother it so it'll suffocate. Well I'll admit it, you've caught me, but I'm still locked & loaded, so I'm gonna keep going whether you keep looking or not.
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Apr 28, 2023 06:48
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Mr Donovan, you testified that on Friday the 28th of April 2023 you saw me masturbating in a tree. Is this correct? It is. Did you also testified that you were approximately 20 meters away at the time? Yes. So, about as far as the back of the court to the witness stand? It looks to be a very similar distance to me. Yes. *I walk to the back of the court and drop my pants* Mr Donovan, can you see my penis now? And I remind you that you're under oath. *squinting* I..I.. no I can't. It's too small. Then how, Mr Donovan, can you be so sure that it was my penis that I was touching when you saw me in the tree? *shaking his head in disbelief* I suppose I can't. *murmuring in the court* It's so small. I can't believe it. What a bombshell. *judge banging her gavel* Silence! Silence in the court! If the penis is too small then that's all. Case dismissed!
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Apr 28, 2023 07:20
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"Knock next time, but it's still gonna smell like cum in here. Anyway what do you want since you've interrupted me pulling my goalie?"
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Apr 28, 2023 07:21
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Apr 28, 2023 07:26
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Look you may be upset now but just be thankful you didn’t see what I was doing before this.
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Apr 28, 2023 21:58
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OHooh oh, sorry no just doing some forearm strength training. you know, for the sports i play.
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Apr 28, 2023 22:28
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Uhm it's actually called clean and jerk, try lifting a weight some time
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Apr 28, 2023 22:39
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It's actually an optical illusion.
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Apr 29, 2023 00:45
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I do not avoid women. But I do deny them my essence
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Apr 29, 2023 01:20
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Oh sorry my balls were dangerously full
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Apr 29, 2023 01:49
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uuuuh i'm not mastubrating! oh god! oh god!
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Apr 29, 2023 01:54
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regarding what you saw on the zoom: i was just toobin'. remember? that fun meme thing from 2021 or so? toobin'. delightful. what a whimsical thing to do.
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Apr 29, 2023 10:08
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Mr Donovan, you testified that on Friday the 28th of April 2023 you saw me masturbating in a tree. Is this correct? Objection, your honor, why was this not brought up in the discovery phase?
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Apr 29, 2023 12:20
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im practicing for ur wedding night
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Apr 29, 2023 13:53
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0D5I-0-PLN8
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Apr 29, 2023 14:07
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Well don't just stand there come over here and help
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Apr 29, 2023 14:42
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I learned it by watching you!
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Apr 29, 2023 15:09
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Ayyyyy I'm wankin here!
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Apr 29, 2023 15:53
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