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git apologist posted:he would be too busy telling everyone how much of an atheist he is That's Penn you clown
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Aug 30, 2023 20:06
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Saalkin posted:That's Penn you clown no, he definitely meant Teller. Penn would be too busy penning how much of an atheist he is.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:10
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Bad Purchase posted:no, he definitely meant Teller. Penn would be too busy penning how much of an atheist he is. Teller is mute because Penn cut out his tongue when he said now much he loved God
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Aug 30, 2023 20:13
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saalkin saayin that penn tells and teller pens? no, that wouldn’t make any sense.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:17
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Mach 7 Razor Blades just keep magically ending up in my pockets.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:17
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A guy I occasionally chat to on discord mentioned a that the UK retailer he worked for had inventory stolen all the time or never even arrive. The biggest scam however was the abuse of a till's "store transaction" system. It was nominally for someone who left their wallet in the car or had to get an extra bit of money out the ATM. But you were still given a printout that looked like receipt, but wasn't an actual receipt. So if you were in with the tiller, you could do your shopping for free and walk out with a pseudo-receipt that would fool all but the most anal security guard. It went on for years and was only caught because four tills had ramped it up to the tune of ~£15k worth of goods a week being redistributed, each. Couldn't be fully audited because the tech at the time only kept like 2 weeks of till memory. He also mentioned poo poo like the company making a generic barcode for vouchers that would be photocopied and accepted without complaint, because all vouchers had the same barcode. Also because of this, the tiller could add a multiplier to them at the till, even if the purchaser only had one. Also employees managing to get millions of store points for themselves, can't recall how that happened exactly. It's a wonder they're still in business loving up at that level.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:18
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of all the celebs likely to secretly be a goon i always thought penn jillette was a prime suspect
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Aug 30, 2023 20:24
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redshirt posted:Mach 7 Razor Blades just keep magically ending up in my pockets. price of those things would make that felony theft lmao am i right? 
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Aug 30, 2023 20:26
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School Nickname posted:It's a wonder they're still in business loving up at that level. not really a wonder when the store charges $6 for a bag of tostitos that cost about 50 cents to make and transport can absorb a lot of theft with retail markups
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Aug 30, 2023 20:26
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Bad Purchase posted:not really a wonder when the store charges $6 for a bag of tostitos that cost about 50 cents to make and transport Those chips better be refrigerated to ice cold for that kind of money.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:28
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Earwicker posted:of all the celebs likely to secretly be a goon i always thought penn jillette was a prime suspect My cousin went to highschool with him, I've even seen the year book photo. She says he was extremely annoying, always trying to be the class clown.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:32
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Tostitos are for suckers, if you're not making your own tortilla chips (You should, it's cheap and easy) then just buy the cheapest poo poo you can find. Go to Food City and buy a bag of Santitas or even Calidads for a dollar or two.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:34
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Make my own chips? I ain't got time for that poo poo, I gotta steal stuff. The best commercial tortilla chips are Mi Niña or Xochitl by a wide margin.
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Aug 30, 2023 20:49
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PinheadSlim posted:If anyone actually believes the 95 billion number that would mean the average American stole over 300 dollars worth of goods per person every year. Thefts Georg, who lives in a Walmart distribution center and steals over 10,000 TVs each day, is an outlier and should not have been counted
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Aug 30, 2023 21:11
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Shoplifting is so 2021. I’m all about shopdropping now, where I stock the shelf items with my own money.
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Aug 30, 2023 21:14
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Toxic Mental posted:Shoplifting is so 2021. I’m all about shopdropping now, where I stock the shelf items with my own money. hot cocoa on the couch posted:you like to steal an extra lick of the boot
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Aug 30, 2023 21:15
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A Strange Aeon posted:There was an interesting movie sort of about this called Emily the Thief. I guess it's more credit card fraud than shoplifting but there is a lot of similarities when you get down to it. Emily the Criminal https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15255876/. Aubrey Plaza is the title character.
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Aug 30, 2023 21:30
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It's a good movie.
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Aug 30, 2023 21:34
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While we're here I would be remiss not to recommend Tao Lin's short book Shoplifting from American Apparel. Good literature and also contains helpful shoplifting advice!
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Aug 30, 2023 21:42
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Loss Prevention Officers can suck my dang balls!!!
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Aug 30, 2023 21:55
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i apologize for my previous post itt
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Aug 30, 2023 21:58
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pencilhands posted:i apologize for my previous post itt what about all the rest of them?
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Aug 30, 2023 22:17
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pencilhands posted:i apologize for my previous post itt lmao
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Aug 30, 2023 22:18
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Sophy Wackles posted:"The shoplifting crisis is actually made up bullshit!" Shoplifting is a thing that happens but the hype about it was literally from a handful of companies that wanted to be able to write off a higher level of inventory than would otherwise be reasonable without having a manufactured crisis as justification for changing their methodology. I suspect a lot of it is being backtracked now thanks to the price gouging due to "inflation" and the US being moronic and allowing you to use LIFO so they actually want to draw down their inventory to rake in the profits.
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Aug 30, 2023 22:23
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pencilhands posted:i apologize for my previous post itt on behalf of everyone, i forgive you
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Aug 30, 2023 22:30
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pencilhands posted:i apologize for my previous post itt lol
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Aug 30, 2023 22:37
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aniviron posted:While we're here I would be remiss not to recommend Tao Lin's short book Shoplifting from American Apparel. Good literature and also contains helpful shoplifting advice! fun fact about tao lin, either he was a dedicated shitposter here for a couple years, or there was an extremely obsessive and dedicated fan of his pretending to be him
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Aug 30, 2023 22:46
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That's loving awesome. I would believe he posted here, but then again I would also believe that someone would post with that gimmick.
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Aug 30, 2023 22:47
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Bad Purchase posted:on behalf of everyone, i forgive you I don't 
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Aug 30, 2023 23:09
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PinheadSlim posted:No I'm sorry, for the crime of taking a sweater that's been abandoned for 11 months I sentence you to being a cop. Oink oink, fascist! uh yeah they'll come pick it up when it gets cold again grow a brain pencilhands posted:i apologize for my previous post itt lol Klyith posted:what about all the rest of them? lmao
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Aug 30, 2023 23:46
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show us shoplifting v wage theft chart or "inflation" then ask if I give a hot gently caress!
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Aug 30, 2023 23:47
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Guys, it's all just bananas. Till AI shows up. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.the-sun.com/money/7263644/self-checkout-update-could-end-banana-trick/amp/ Then it's all just granola? Lol so easy. I myself am a fan of artisan salami's I slam in my pants.
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Aug 30, 2023 23:53
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Chewbecca posted:I don't no, i definitely included you
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Aug 31, 2023 00:03
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I know someone who stole half their thanksgiving dinner for their family because they were poor as poo poo and the walmart guy watched them and came over and helped them bag it and told them to have a merry christmas and a happier new year. sometimes the blue shirts are good folks too. the following year was 2020, for the record.
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Aug 31, 2023 00:10
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Earwicker posted:pff i know right? thats just like one tin of caviar. my favorite tale from the service desk at a grocery store was when this lady returned two tins of caviar (or something similar, it wasn't an upscale grocery store so I don't think it was caviar but it was in a small can and cost like $50) and used the refund to immediately buy a carton of 305's and two 24's of natty light. the store manager went and checked our inventory system that said we had two in stock prior to accepting the return but the shelf was empty. lmao owned.
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Aug 31, 2023 00:25
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Aug 31, 2023 00:29
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BlueBlazer posted:Guys, it's all just bananas.  My "this image tricks AI into thinking everything is a banana" t-shirt has check-out clerks asking a lot of questions that are already answered by the shirt. Klyith fucked around with this message at 00:43 on Aug 31, 2023 |
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Aug 31, 2023 00:41
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Bad Purchase posted:no, i definitely included you Stop stealing my right to being indignant!!
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Aug 31, 2023 13:44
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:I know someone who stole half their thanksgiving dinner for their family because they were poor as poo poo and the walmart guy watched them and came over and helped them bag it and told them to have a merry christmas and a happier new year. 
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Aug 31, 2023 14:11
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On the other end of the scale when I worked at Raising Canes the manager always came to work strapped to « protect us » Sir I would like to not die in a shootout over the fried chicken money thanks
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Aug 31, 2023 14:37
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