Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens - Choose Your Own Adventure

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > The Game Room > Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens - Choose Your Own Adventure

«‹›14 »

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ May 20, 2013 00:12

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 21:06

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ May 21, 2013 08:46

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

H. Anyone who doesn't like the cold and uncaring father is ok in my book.

# ¿ May 21, 2013 23:47

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Ok, you guys convinced me to change my vote to F.

# ¿ May 22, 2013 10:10

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

the_steve posted:

G. "Save Jalitha!" While pointing frantically

# ¿ May 22, 2013 19:32

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Tremynci posted:

Oh, my Lord, this. But I see it more like this:

Your father stares down at you sternly, his hands holding Jalitha's hair out, and grates, "Beg forgiveness, my son! Pray that this witch has not defiled you forever!"

You look at Jalitha. She smiles at you -- a small smile, and it obviously hurts her. You look down at the tooth and dig your heels in, remembering when you fell and skinned your knee running after Papa, and Jalitha cuddled you and kissed it all better. You don't want to do this! Then Jalitha nods a little and smiles again. You rub your toe back and forth in the dirt, still looking down, and mumble "Sorry, Mr Fishy," just loud enough for the assembly to hear, as you put the tooth to her hair and clumsily hack through it. As you lean over to finish the job, your father doesn't hear you whisper, "Sorry, Jalitha," with a voice full of tears, or see you give her hug.

Which, I guess, is C.

This is probably the best possible outcome. Going for C.

# ¿ May 23, 2013 23:08

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

1

D. Mom
A. Father
E. Jalitha
B. Uncle Jorah
C. Uncle Pagam
G. Alone in the forest
F. Alone along the beach
H. Alone, swimming in the ocean

2

L. Yes, to both Ashera and the gods of your people, alongside Jalitha's sky giant, you believe in them both

# ¿ May 24, 2013 21:00

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ May 25, 2013 21:01

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

SerSpook posted:

Don't ask if he's our father. I don't necessarily want to directly bring out the voice, but just ask if he knows of or has ever heard voices from the sea.

Yeah I'm going for this.

# ¿ May 25, 2013 22:35

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Trundel posted:

J aka Lanky Coconut Tree plan is a fine one, and so I vote for it. We don't know enough about what's going on here to just run off and leave everything behind, and it's more important now to stop any bloodshed before it begins.

Voting J

# ¿ May 27, 2013 19:27

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Rahul posted:

By the way, in spite of what I posted above, and despite it having no support or momentum, my personal vote remains plan Theglavwen:

Tell them he's boss of the sky giants, and worshipped by the people of the land, and who rules over them the way Asherah rules the sea.

Voting for Rahul's plan.

# ¿ May 29, 2013 21:24

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

1. A
2. A + G

# ¿ May 31, 2013 00:00

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ Aug 6, 2013 00:42

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Going for Tomn's plan.

Just remember that Bareen is sending the slaves she's freed to their death without a hint of regret. I doubt she actually cares about us in any other way then how we can be used to further her own agenda.

gnarl fucked around with this message at 19:58 on Dec 20, 2013

# ¿ Dec 20, 2013 19:55

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

the_steve posted:

I like this, my only concern is failure due to "gently caress you, I'm magic."
Plus, we still need to get through a temple full of Bareen's minions, many of whom were probably in on the plan from the beginning.

But then again, fuckit, let's make the bitch work for this.

Changing my vote to this, but also throw in the command to have Snarls grab Danal and run for help.

Voting for this plan.

# ¿ Dec 21, 2013 11:59

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

paragon1 posted:

This

Yup.

# ¿ Dec 22, 2013 02:13

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

N and voting to zap Enki's balls

# ¿ Feb 14, 2014 22:14

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

FoxTerrier posted:

We're absolutely robbing Naomi of her fertility by marrying her while sterile.

This isn't the modern age. Unless I am greatly mistaken, there is no divorce. When Naomi weds us, she weds for life. That means if we cannot give her babies, nobody can�well, unless she wants to risk a stoning. She may have all her plumbing intact, but she will be effectively sterile.

I'm 99% sure Naomi loves us enough she'll be willing to endure this (which will surely be a very difficult place for a woman to have in a society that emphasizes the woman's role as child bearer above all), but the element of choice is crucial. She needs to be allowed to decide to have kids if she wants, and that means talking to her before we wed, so if she decides she wants babies she can go marry someone fertile.

If we take that choice away from her, how are we better than the overbearing Melachim we've been complaining about?

Plan Creepy Baby lost out last round btw. But even if we do go back to it, that just means her giving her consent first�which, frankly, is pretty crucial to rendering it less creepy (although it's still pretty goddamn creepy�seriously, just where is Ish planning on getting the souls for these golumn babies?). Or, we decide to be Creepazoids and not tell her, and she believes it's a miracle (as you suggest). Hardly an impossible thing to believe in this society, where Melachim reward the righteous etc.

So, yeah. If we're going to bitch about people trying to make decisions regarding to our fertiliy, then we owe it to Naomi to make her own regarding hers.

Let her know we're sterile. Let her choose to be barren with us, or fertile with another man.

It's the Right Thing To Do.

I agree.

# ¿ Feb 16, 2014 00:30

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ Mar 7, 2014 19:26

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Don't eat the heart. Let's at least try to show some form of self control.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2014 19:46

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Calm down/Don't breathe/Control

# ¿ Mar 15, 2014 00:34

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ Mar 26, 2014 18:58

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ Mar 27, 2014 23:51

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

myl

# ¿ Apr 7, 2014 17:49

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

1.A
2.E
3.J
4.Q
5.X, Adopt an orphan.

# ¿ Apr 19, 2014 18:55

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

1. D
2. V

# ¿ Apr 27, 2014 19:16

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

1. A
2. G

# ¿ May 3, 2014 13:10

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Larry Bird!

# ¿ May 5, 2014 16:56

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

. W...ke ...p En...idE..!. Let's try to prevent another eternal hunger frenzy. There is no angel to save us this time.

# ¿ May 14, 2014 22:03

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Althair posted:

1. C

2. I

3. O

4. R

We have faced demons and monsters, we will not balk in the face of tricky logistics! The young and the old, the hale and the cripple, any pious soul who wishes to go up to the House of El in Baitel shall travel under the protection of Enkidel, son of Tudiya king in Zepath, of the House of Zepa, of the Blood of Labaras! Any who wish it, let him come! For EL turns away no-one and neither will we! ELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

Yup. Going with this plan.

# ¿ May 23, 2014 18:47

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Plan K

# ¿ May 29, 2014 20:29

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

HBar posted:

B
H: WHO DARES BURN THE TEMPLE OF EL?!
I

Dio: From a distance, how can we tell that it's a temple of El and not a temple of the Melachim?

This.

# ¿ Jun 2, 2014 17:46

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

falcon2424 posted:

I'd suggest something in the spirit of the initial vote:

Keep Uriah with us. If I remember correctly, he's blooded enough that he'll stand out. And it'd be good for us to have a blooded, native retainer.

Meanwhile, send Jobe to talk to the camp's priests. He can take Snarls and Danal as a bodyguard. Maybe he'll make headway with the priests. More importantly, it's a way to get him into the camp and separated from us. Then, when something goes horribly wrong, we can call for their help via Snarls and they can get us unshackled/whatever.

---

And the question about 'divine or just blooded?' made me realize we've got a huge tactical advantage that we haven't considered. The king doesn't know how strong we are. He'll have to guess based on height. And we're massive.

This matters because it gives him a strong disincentive to pick a fight. We know he'd win. But for all he knows, we're on par with Tudiya. And Tudiya could probably level this city's army. Their guard-captain is just 7'3". That's like a good-sized farmer in Zepath.

Snarls might be able to help with making us seem blooded, too. We know we can't read minds. But they don't know that. We could fake it using information from out hyper-intelligent, telepathic spy-dog.

I like this plan. Voting for plan Flacon2424

# ¿ Jun 7, 2014 14:30

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Just F

If we hand over all of our weapons, he will find out that we have Saul's sword. If he mentions that to the king before we speak to him he might not be receptive to our (El's) warning. I wonder if we should say something about that to him.

gnarl fucked around with this message at 21:23 on Jun 7, 2014

# ¿ Jun 7, 2014 21:18

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Razakai posted:

Y - I have been sent by the Melachim with a message from El. Two days ago in the village of Ashkalon, on the eve of your triumph, the men of Harmath wantonly slaughtered our fathers favored creation put his shrine to the torch. For this desecration, your victory is forfeit. Those who participated this sacrilege have have been slain. You and your allies will lift the siege of Tadmor, gather your armies and return to your homes. If you do not do this by the setting of the sun hence, great calamity will befall you."

I like Maxhush's plan, but no mention of our name. Give the near-exact words, say very little else, and then just turn around and walk out of the tent.

Plan Razakai.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2014 16:38

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

Plan Razakai.

# ¿ Jun 8, 2014 22:06

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ Jun 9, 2014 20:06

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

E, Watching the stars with Azazzel and his goats.

# ¿ Jun 11, 2014 02:44

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

1. H
2. Q
3. X

# ¿ Jun 26, 2014 09:00

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 21:06

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

# ¿ Jun 28, 2014 09:50

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > The Game Room > Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens - Choose Your Own Adventure

«‹›14 »