A complete mystery man is mowing my lawn right now

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > A complete mystery man is mowing my lawn right now

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

So I was in the kitchen about to put some bacon on the frying pan when I looked through the window and saw a random rear end pick up truck with a trailer sitting in my driveway. I was confused as poo poo about who it may be. While I was squinting to see who was inside the truck a man blew by my from the backyard on one of those landscaper dude type lawn mowers. I was like " :aaa:

who the gently caress was that?" So I decided to investigate further and went to the front door and saw him just mowing my lawn. I did not hire this man and no one else in the house hired this man. I'm fairly confident he is a landscaper and is currently at the wrong house. But I'm not gonna stop him cause I don't want to mow my lawn myself anyway.

Mystery Truck In The Driveway:

Mystery Man Mowing My Lawn:

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:09

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 19:05

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Uh oh! Looks like something is wrong with his mower!

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:09

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Just managed to catch it, but he is now riding his lawn mower off into the woods :wtc:

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:15

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

THERE IS NOW A SECOND MAN HERE AND HE IS OUTSIDE THE WINDOWS(98) :siren:

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:20

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

I'm fairly certain one of them saw me. So I tried to take a more stealth picture this time from a vantage point he couldn't see. Calling the FBI as we speak.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:29

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Junkfist posted:

They are the FBI.

P.S. they've bugged your pumpkin.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:33

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Unsatisfied with just abusing my lawn they have now moved on to attacking my driveway. Note the window shade in the pictures because I am afraid they will catch another glimpse of me and I really don't want them to know I am looking at them from the window while I touch myself.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:38

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

SaltLick posted:

your car is lovely

That's my brother's car. My car was a sick Jetta before I totaled it like the pro driver I am.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:42

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

YourHealthyColon posted:

this is probably the most exciting thing to ever happen in that midwestern suburban hellhole

I live in a suburb outside of Boston. You know. Probably one of the only decent places to live in America.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:51

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

You honestly think I haven't contacted them to ask who these mystery men are? They also have no idea. They told me to just let them work and to not bother than and go back to my WoW.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:54

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

In 2005 I was 14 years old hth. Probably a lot funnier and cooler than you at 14.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:56

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Angry Birds Suicide posted:

Itt the OP admits he peaked at 14

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 17:58

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

a hole-y ghost posted:

dude op youer house looks pretty nice.. can i come over and stay?

Only if you agree to have a sick slumber party where we drink mountain dew, play Halo2, have pillow fights in our PJs, and then in the middle of the night let me wake up to you secretly masturbating on my floor in a sleeping bag cause you think I'm asleep.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:05

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Oh snap. I think i may have a real reason to report them now....

http://www.boston.com/yourtown/news/brookline/2013/09/brookline_police_arrest_man_after_alleged_leaf_blower_violat.html

News posted:

Brookline Police arrest man after alleged leaf blower violation

Brookline Police arrested a landscaper Saturday for allegedly violating local leaf blower laws and then refusing to identify himself to an officer.

By Tuesday, though, the case was beginning to unravel.

Marvin Astillo, 40, of Waltham, was arrested Saturday after Brookline Police said they spotted him and another man using gasoline powered leaf blowers in a parking lot at 850 Boylston Street Saturday morning before 9 a.m. Three other men were also doing landscaping work on the property at the time, including pulling weeds and using a lawn mower, according to a police report.

Police signaled for the men to stop working and informed them that under a local bylaw governing leaf blower use in Brookline they are not allowed to use the gasoline-powered tools between May 15 and Sept. 15 and they are not allowed to perform landscaping work before 9 a.m. on Saturdays, Sundays and holidays. Police informed the men that Saturday was Yom Kippur.

The local leaf blower laws took effect in Brookline in June 2012, and violations carry fines ranging from $50 for a first offense to $200 for a third offense.

But when police asked Astillo to identify himself, he asked why he needed to provide identification, according to the police report. Police again informed him that he was violating the town’s bylaws and he needed to provide identification so he could be issued a citation for the violation, according to police. Police said Astillo again refused to identify himself and when police asked a third time he began to walk away and was shaking his head.

He was then arrested on a charge of refusing to submit his name and identification to police and for two violations of town bylaws, according to police.

The second man who had been operating a leaf blower, whose name has not been released, said he was the foreman and identified himself to police. He was fined a total of $100 for operating a gasoline powered leaf blower between May 15 and Sept. 15 and performing landscaping with equipment prior to 9 a.m. on a Saturday, according to police.

Update: On Tuesday, the case against Astillo began to fall apart.

Brookline District Court Judge Mary Dacey White dismissed the complaint against Astillo on Monday, before he was to be arraigned, David Traub, spokesman for the Norfolk County District Attorney’s Office, said Tuesday. Traub said it is the district attorney office’s understanding that the complaint was dismissed because only criminal violations are supposed to go through the arraignment process; the leaf blowing incident was a civil infraction.

As a result of the dismissal, Brookline Police Chief Daniel O’Leary said Tuesday he doesn’t think Astillo will have to pay fines for the alleged leaf blower violations, either.

O’Leary said Tuesday that if Astillo had just co-operated with police from the start, he never would have been arrested.

“Our goal is not to arrest people,” O’Leary said. “Our goal is to get compliance.”

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:20

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

It appears they have managed to get all the leaves in one location. Probably so I can jump in them because I am a giant man baby who lives with his parents.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:25

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Demonachizer posted:

Brookline is a super Jewish town abutting Boston with a bunch of wealthy liberals mixed in.

This accurately describes my household to the T. Tyvm.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:27

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

I'm trying to push the envelope here and get a little risky so I took a selfie with the mower man

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:32

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

More action shots

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:48

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dc-IJnOVYiM

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:48

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QNMJfRN-ck

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:50

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

CloFan posted:

This thread is riveting, Jake Holland

Thanks CloFan!

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:51

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

If you other faggots feel like being doxxing retards you can go watch the other videos on my channel that were taken at my condo that I used to live in for 5 years but then left to recently move back home.

(still a man baby tho)

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:52

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

HollisBrown posted:

Did your parents pay your rent? This is important.

No I did, but I had 3 roommates and one of them hosed my girlfriend so I moved back home and broke up with her. My life is a joke and I was cucked. The good news is I have a pristine mowed lawn.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:55

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Haverchuck posted:

why would you volunteer information like this

Windows 98 posted:

My life is a joke

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:57

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

UPDATE: They have packed up and left

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 18:57

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Wish I had archives so I could read that thread about the guys neighbor who jacks off with the windows open and he started using a laser pointer at him

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 19:19

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Naw I was just casually mentioning it. I have a job and money and could buy archives if I really wanted to. It just was something that I thought of because it was in a similar vein of voyeurism and I have no filter and I post what my brain thinks.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 19:24

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

1gnoirents posted:

and that when I joined SA. makes you think

SA made your life gay

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 19:31

Windows 98: Nov 13, 2005; HTTP 400: Bad post

Sephiroth_IRA posted:

I had a pissed off neighbor mow my lawn once (It wasn't even high) so I filled up a water balloon, mixed in a little roundup and tossed it into his backyard.

Woah. I told u i was hardcore.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2014 19:47