Berenstein Bears conspiracy

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Nanomashoes: Aug 18, 2012

Amorphous Blob posted:

check out how pissed the dad is

So are ya Chinese or Japanese?

# ? Aug 1, 2015 01:00

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 21:33

FedEx Mercury: Jan 7, 2004; Me bad posting? That's unpossible!; Lipstick Apathy

Budget Dracula posted:

yeah but look at him when the right kind of bears move in

I love the retard smug look on the yokel bear patriarch.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 02:08

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

notZaar posted:

I love the retard smug look on the yokel bear patriarch.

He has palmed a small nip of moonshine and is using that handshake to secretly pass it to Papa Bear as a promise of more 'shine to come if he keeps his hick mouth shut. The Berenstain Bears love their neighbors.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 02:34

a shiny rock: Nov 13, 2009

thread much funnier than expected

# ? Aug 1, 2015 02:49

Violet_Sky: Dec 5, 2011; Fun Shoe

Michael Cera voiced Brother Bear at one point.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 02:53

Phobic Nest: Oct 2, 2013; You Are My Sunshine

Goddamn are there a lot of these books.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Berenstain_Bears_books#Publication_summary

I guess 2008 is when it all went to ~~hell~~ heaven.

It amuses me that The Berenstain Bears Bible exists and hey, it seems pretty progressive.

Looks like among bears it really was Adam and Steve.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 03:11

Crazyeyes: Nov 5, 2009; If I were human, I believe my response would be: 'go to hell'.

I always thought it was really weird how Mama Bear never changed out of her nightie. That's some mental handicap/dementia kind of poo poo. And no one so much as bats an eye. Very unnerving to have a mentally unstable bear wandering the town.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 03:20

Huge Lady Pleaser: Jun 17, 2005; hello how r u doing im just looking for ppl 2 chill wit relax go out n have funn if ur looking for da same thing hit me up; Nap Ghost

Simply lol if you're parents didn't lub you enough to get the audiobooks where they pronounced the name correctly

# ? Aug 1, 2015 03:42

Phobic Nest: Oct 2, 2013; You Are My Sunshine

haha they've started taking old books and giving 'em a Jesusy makeover

e: better pic

Phobic Nest fucked around with this message at 03:52 on Aug 1, 2015

# ? Aug 1, 2015 03:47

Egbert Souse: Nov 6, 2008

Thank God for the Electoral College

# ? Aug 1, 2015 03:54

OMG JC a Bomb!: Jul 13, 2004; We are the Invisible Spatula. We are the Grilluminati. We eat before and after dinner. We eat forever. And eventually... eventually we will lead them into the dining room.

Is there a Berenstein Bears book where they have to deal with a bunch of "those bears" playing rap music outside of their tree and threatening their girlfriends at 1 AM?

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:06

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

mods?

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:09

Phobic Nest: Oct 2, 2013; You Are My Sunshine

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:16

Violet_Sky: Dec 5, 2011; Fun Shoe

Fojar38 posted:

mods?

Like any goon could do a handstand.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:19

Phobic Nest: Oct 2, 2013; You Are My Sunshine

Mike Berenstain

thanks God everyday that his dead parents gave him something he could make money pissing all over

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:25

RaceBannon: Apr 3, 2010

Wait.

I remember "stein" and I don't remember any churchy stuff at all!

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:30

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

Sister loving popped that bitch Toughy right in the kisser. Arthur Reid vs Sister Bear: Rage in the Cage 2015

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:34

Frostwerks: Sep 24, 2007; by Lowtax

Amorphous Blob posted:

check out how pissed the dad is

photoshop a nazi armband on papa bear, tia

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:40

Frostwerks: Sep 24, 2007; by Lowtax

Amorphous Blob posted:

bananas gorilla was my favorite i liked how her wore a bunch of watches with different time zones

so he was bucky fuller then?

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:40

TEAYCHES: Jun 23, 2002

Frostwerks posted:

photoshop a nazi armband on papa bear, tia

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:45

Amorphous Blob: Jun 26, 2009; by Lowtax
(and can't post for 2 years!)

Frostwerks posted:

so he was bucky fuller then?

Nah he's some good for nothin grifter. I'll read about Mr Buckminster later. I'll edit the pic tomorrow if no one else does.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:47

RaceBannon: Apr 3, 2010

B�renj�ger bears

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:49

Frostwerks: Sep 24, 2007; by Lowtax

the father from the waspy family in clifford always complaining that the bearenstein bears control the media

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:53

Frostwerks: Sep 24, 2007; by Lowtax

R.L..... Stein?! what the f-ck...

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:54

Frostwerks: Sep 24, 2007; by Lowtax

is papa bear mad that the pandas are asian or that they are both black AND white? this is important. I am writing an analysis

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:55

oldpainless: Oct 30, 2009; This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
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Papa bear is a country bumpkin so u know be racist as hell

I mean he's got good reason to distrust the China bears but still.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 04:57

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Aug 1, 2015 06:13

ashgromnies: Jun 19, 2004

http://youtu.be/IHuMzSvXNnM

# ? Aug 1, 2015 06:42

symbolic: Nov 2, 2014

ashgromnies posted:

http://youtu.be/IHuMzSvXNnM

what the gently caress are these voices

what the gently caress is this animation

what the gently caress why does the dialogue rhyme

what the gently caress

# ? Aug 1, 2015 06:47

Gianthogweed: Jun 3, 2004; "And then I see the disinfectant...where it knocks it out in a minute. One minute. And is there a way we can do something like that. Uhh, by injection inside..." - a Very Stable Genius.

This is old news. I had this argument over the pronunciation of their name with my friend Sharon back in 1987. The real conspiracy is that The Simpsons is basically a parody of the Berenstain Bears.

Gianthogweed fucked around with this message at 08:15 on Aug 1, 2015

# ? Aug 1, 2015 08:02

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjXiIZYsGJY

im heterosexual

# ? Aug 1, 2015 08:10

Noctis Horrendae: Nov 1, 2013

this is a really good example of herd mentality at work

# ? Aug 1, 2015 08:11

dsriggs: May 28, 2012; MONEY FALLS...

...FROM THE SKY...

...WHENEVER HE POSTS!

Fojar38 posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjXiIZYsGJY

im heterosexual

They had a rhyming couplet, where they rhymed "Split-level tree" with "Split-level tree".

I mean, gently caress.

# ? Aug 1, 2015 08:41

Robo Reagan: Feb 12, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

POWERBALL posted:

I assume that everyone who had a fulfilling and happy childhood like me remembers the lessons they learned from the nuclear bear family, the Bernstein bears?

Admittedly, I first read about this phenomenon on reddit, but I wanted to bring it to you, GBS. I have confirmed this IRL with several friends.

Everyone knows the family's name is Berenstein, right? I would swear up and down that this is the spelling of the family's name. Before I found out about this conspiracy I would have sworn my life on it. So you can imagine that I was shocked to find out that in fact, the bear family's name is not spelling Bernstein. Or even Berenstein. It's Berenstain, with an "a" rather than an "e". Don't believe me? Just look at this poo poo:

I was as confident in the spelling of "Bernstein" as I was my own name or the fact that 2+2=4. My friends have confirmed that it used to definitely be spelling with an e. There is no A in Berenstein. WTF. Can anyone explain this?

my gf was talking about this yesterday so congrats on reading buzzfeed

# ? Aug 1, 2015 08:43

Cactus Ghost: Dec 20, 2003; you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

Windows 98 posted:

Thanks for the update from 2003

you regd in 05 bitch

# ? Aug 1, 2015 09:26

Chrpno: Apr 17, 2006

Gianthogweed posted:

This is old news. I had this argument over the pronunciation of their name with my friend Sharon back in 1987. The real conspiracy is that The Simpsons is basically a parody of the Berenstain Bears.

SHUT UP, BOWY

# ? Aug 1, 2015 09:40

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Gianthogweed posted:

The real conspiracy is that The Simpsons is basically a parody of the Berenstain Bears.

Holy poo poo this works extremely well

# ? Aug 1, 2015 14:53

b0bS4get: Apr 3, 2009

POWERBALL posted:

Everyone knows the family's name is Berenstein, right? I would swear up and down that this is the spelling of the family's name. Before I found out about this conspiracy I would have sworn my life on it. So you can imagine that I was shocked to find out that in fact, the bear family's name is not spelling Bernstein. Or even Berenstein. It's Berenstain, with an "a" rather than an "e". Don't believe me? Just look at this poo poo:

I was as confident in the spelling of "Bernstein" as I was my own name or the fact that 2+2=4. My friends have confirmed that it used to definitely be spelling with an e. There is no A in Berenstein. WTF. Can anyone explain this?

hosed up if true.

It's not :ssh:

# ? Aug 1, 2015 18:03

a shiny rock: Nov 13, 2009

i actually remember the book where mama bear got pregnant and gave birth to the 3rd kid

i didnt know they made more after that with the baby as part of the family

# ? Aug 1, 2015 18:05

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 21:33

Amorphous Blob: Jun 26, 2009; by Lowtax
(and can't post for 2 years!)

papa riding bearback

# ? Aug 1, 2015 18:06

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