UKMT Red October 2015: Basically D&D's Communist Motherbase

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Red October 2015: Basically D&D's Communist Motherbase

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Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Thanks Oberleutnant and baka kaba.

There was one common theme throughout the last half of last month's thread, and in the interest of preserving the discussion as it developed:

Thanks OwlFancier and Angepain.

In other news:
� Jeremy Corbyn and Tom Watson won the Labour leadership and deputy leadership elections, Corbyn winning by a huge margin. The press will continue to pine and call him an unelectable communist as Labour Party membership soars.
� David Cameron describes a Corbyn-led Labour Party as "now a threat to our national security, our economic security and your family's security." Expect this to become a regular accusation.
� Vegan farming minister for the shadow cabinet Kerry McCarthy wants to treat meat eaters like smokers. How she wants to treat smoked meat eaters, meat smokers, or indeed meat fuckers has not been elaborated upon.
� Jeremy Corbyn outlines that he would not 'Push the Button', remaining true to both his lifelong pacifism and distaste for mid 2000s pop.
� The London Metropolitan Police lied about a sudden arrhythmia death, trying to pin it on the notorious 'hippie crack' (aka the gas you get at the dentist), and has finally apologised long after the press had turned it into a full blown moral panic and harassed the family.
� David Cameron is off to Jamaica to help build a prison, on the condition that he can offshore prisoners due for deportation there. And presumably to try the jerk pork.
� Russia is beginning air strikes against (anti-Assad parts of) Syria. Britain will probably be pressured to launch strikes against Assad, because there's no war like a proxy war.
� Corbyn is (still) an unelectable communist according to the press.

:spooky:

Halloween (Th)Red Scare Spook-tacular! :spooky:

Gaze into the Archives of Madness! Watch evil triumph over good! See man and beast become as one!
UKMT September 2015 Thread (DCFADP)
UKMT August 2015 Thread
UKMT July 2015 Thread
UKMT June 2015 Thread
UKMT General Election 2015 Thread (Spoiler: Tories Win)
UKMT April 2015 Thread

:ghost:

Revulse from the Heirs of Dracula! Aristocratic madmen who lust for the young! Their soulless slaves plant insanity into the minds of men!
Paedogeddon/Press Corruption Thread

:ghost:

Beware the Caoineag, whose cries bring the death of union!
Scotpol Thread

:ghost:

Cower at the living corpse of The Mummy, as it walks around wearing foreign clothes and doesn't even have the decency to curse people in English!
EDL/Fash Thread

:ghost:

Hark the lonesome whistle of the ghost train that could not be privatised!
Trainchat Thread

:ghost:

Stanley 'Mac' McMurtry! OoooOoooOOO!
Political Cartoons Thread

:ghost:

The chat protocol that Would Not Die!
#ukgoons on synIRC. It's mostly active during Question Time, but there's always some people around (thanks crispix).

Guavanaut fucked around with this message at 00:12 on Oct 1, 2015

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 00:05

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 00:15

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

OwlFancier posted:

And Angepain for supplying the code to harvest your delicious posts. Any muggins can plug it into a word cloud generator.

Noted and added.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 00:12

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

ShaneMacGowansTeeth posted:

is this talking about the Sugababes or The Chemical Brothers? Either way I think Comrade Corbyn is wrong on both counts

Sugababes. Perhaps we should ask Comrade Corbyn his thoughts via the submissions thing for the next People's PMQs.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 00:27

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Phoon posted:

theyre protecting the monsters from the weak

It reads more like they're protecting the few from the monsters and the weak.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 09:52

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

I'd be nice if they glowed blue or something so we could tell who they were.

Dystopian 70s sci-fi ending as we all look in a mirror and discover that we are also blue.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 10:10

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Fans posted:

If we ever get to that point that the UK is obliterated by nuclear weapons I will agree that Corbyn wasn't a very good Prime Minister if he pushes the button or not.

It could just mean that somebody else wasn't a very good leader.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 10:17

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Oberleutnant posted:

We don't have any tactical nuclear weapons, Pissflaps.

This is a good thing. Tactical nuclear weapons encourage the idea of a 'limited nuclear exchange'.

Fans posted:

Well usually we'd let history be the judge but I'm not sure that'd work in that specific instance. The one where everybody is dead.

That instance is morally neutral by definition though, like Corbyn's asteroid which he has already said he would support. The worst thing about nuclear war is that not everyone would die. There would be a lot of people left alive in terrible conditions and suffering. Also in a lot of exchange scenarios Australia is left unscathed and that's just terrible.

Maybe that's why all the super rich want to go to New Zealand. :tinfoil:

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 10:59

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Junior G-man posted:

Have we at long last reached Peak Grauniad?

No, there is always more, and it is always worse.

e: 3 - The rule of emperor Augustus is renewed for a ten-year period. One of the better emperors by all accounts, as at least he didn't gently caress a pig.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 11:02

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Forgall posted:

Conservative voters don't care about pigfucking, and people who do care have never voted for him in the first place.

I thought Conservative voters were supposed to be the moralists who were against all these drugs and breakdown of the family and deviant sex and foreigns (except the good ones).

Stottie Kyek posted:

Which one of you made this?

He looks like he's on top of a Christmas tree, like a star or an angel, but even better.

If it's someone in the thread I will buy one. Or trade one for an equivalent amount of labor by mutual exchange.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 11:07

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Barry Foster posted:

Turns out he is indeed on top of a christmas tree, and you can buy him here

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/250000101/jeremy-corbyn-alternative-xmas-tree

�30.00 plus shipping from Brighton.

Why am I not surprised.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 11:24

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Lord of the Llamas posted:

How many hours do we think it takes to hand make one of those? Any knitting experts here?

I wasn't complaining about the price so much as thinking 'Brighton. Of course. Where else would hand knitted Corbyn tree toppers come from.'

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 11:37

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Lord of the Llamas posted:

In other news Simon Jenkins has some good news; there is no housing crisis! The poors just need to hurry up and socially cleanse themselves.

quote:

Even the poorest newcomers seem to find somewhere (usually private) to rent.

He's right, you know.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 11:46

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Overminty posted:

I've seen it argued that it could be a PR stunt. Not that it affects your point.

Looks like you're right. I thought it was a bit low. :v:

Have a mattress and a microwave for 780 a month instead.
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-53770109.html

(I'm not being 100% fair. You get a toilet too. And a chandelier!)

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 12:23

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

serious gaylord posted:

I believe its a statement about how modern wars are not being fought against nations so deterrents that put off nations have little to no effect on them.

Some people would say that the nuclear deterrent is the reason why modern wars are not being fought between large nations. Others would say that it's more to do with economic globalization. Others still would say that

Oberleutnant posted:

can we please just have a loving moratorium on nukechat

And I'd agree. Perhaps we could have a separate thread for discussing Trident. It'd be a good use for the Tridon't title suggestion.

mfcrocker posted:

there is always more and it is always worse

An Investigation Into the Effects of Nukechat on Threads

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 14:02

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Fans posted:

What if people bring back Boatchat? Are you not going to Nukechat the thread for the good of all?

Nukechat is good if it is discussing nuclear power generation. Nukechat is less good if it descends into nuclear annihilation speculation.

Likewise Boatchat is good if it is discussing living on boats or the use of boats to decrease reliance on airfreight. Boatchat is bad if it is talking about college rowing or your luxury yacht (especially if it's called Morning Cloud).

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 14:09

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

serious gaylord posted:

The morning cloud is what follows me around for the first few minutes after i've woken up.

Don't use it to dispose of children's corpses.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 14:14

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

OhYeah posted:

Look, after the first World War I'm sure a lot of people thought a terrible global conflict which resulted in the death of millions couldn't possibly happen again.

Wasn't the thinking before the First World War that if any possible war was made unbearably destructive by means of alliances, empires, and huge standing armies, no war would happen?

Phoon posted:

how would you prepare and cook a pigs head

I'd stick my cock in there, OP.

Allegedly.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 14:36

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Zephro posted:

The depressing thing is that outside of academia this has become a radical opinion held only by pacifists, communists and terrorist sympathisers instead of a blindingly obvious truth.

A lot more people (especially outside of academia) care a lot more about the continued existence of themselves and their family than a sovereign state like the UK. I don't especially disagree with them either, if there were some sort of WMD like a Proudhon bomb which would kill states and leave people standing, it would be better than nuclear weapons or even standard warfare.

The key here isn't arguing that terrorism isn't a threat to the UK state apparatus, but arguing that there are massively bigger threats to them personally like drivers over 70 or an underfunded NHS or even the anti-terrorism measures themselves, but you'd be arguing against the media and state apparatus that depends on that fear for its own perpetuation.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 14:43

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

MrL_JaKiri posted:

Meanwhile, Dan Hodges (the voice for the sensible Labour supporter) has said that his support for rocket attacks on civilians depends on context

Seems sensible. Qassam rocket attacks on Israeli settlements have killed less Israelis than legal fireworks, whereas Israeli rocket attacks against alleged terrorist installations in Gaza have killed more civilians than fighters.

It is possible to support one of those and not the other.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 14:50

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

OwlFancier likes rare meat and dislikes mushrooms. Should we be worried?

e: vvv And another one. :ohdear:

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 15:23

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

feedmegin posted:

We specifically developed our own in the first place because the US was trying to freeze us out of the results of the Manhattan Project (despite a bunch of the scientists on it being British).

Britain got a bunch of that research back though, in exchange for chemical weapons research generated by gassing servicemen in India and at Porton Down.

jabby posted:

Apparently if the US ever decided to stop supporting us our 'independent deterrent' would be non-functional in a matter of months. So despite us having the ability to 'push the button' if things actually did start to heat up they could neuter us any time they felt like it. Until then we represent another target for any nation that wanted to take on the world, so I guess 'cannon fodder' might sum up our contribution.

If Trident really is a vote winner, why is nobody pushing for an all-British deterrent then? It'd generate jobs, hopefully the R&D would generate positive results elsewhere in the economy, and it seems to touch all the right populist areas, but not even UKIP were talking about that.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 15:44

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Because there was a multipack and the good ones were already gone?

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 16:26

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Oberleutnant posted:

It's the only flavour my local OneStop does. They also have Cheese & Onion Mini Cheddars - they come in green packets.
Weird shop.

Yours is a frightening area.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 16:35

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Darth Walrus posted:

The fact that he called his daughter Nigella never stops being weird to me.

It sounds like a waterborne disease or a 19th century racial epithet, but it's actually a genus of plants.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 17:28

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Seems a little unfair to make them wait that long.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 18:10

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

JFairfax posted:

Dan Hodges used to be a trade union official? What the gently caress happened to him?

I think LemonDrizzle just answered that one. :v:

(Also, Blairism.)

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 19:51

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Renfield posted:

mIRC has decided I have to pay for it... what's an alternative ?

HexChat for Windows, or just click the #ukgoons link in the OP and it'll open a Mibbit session for you.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 22:27

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

XMNN posted:

What would everyone put in their letters of last resort?

I'd like to not have even a tiny part of the fiery hellstorm that Earth would be about to become weighing on my conscience when I evaporated, personally.

"Jesus gently caress. You're reading this, so look what just happened. Look what we as a species did to each other. Do you really want any more of them around to try this again once they've got the technology after a few more rounds of bloody warfare. Push the button, then after launch has completed flood the ballast tanks and pull out your service revolver. gently caress humanity."

I'm not sure there is much rational you could say if it really came to a second strike scenario.

e:

OwlFancier posted:

I'd probably hand-write out the URL to nyan cat or something.

Christ man, it's the end of the world. Do you really think non-essential parts of the internet would be up?

At least draw a picture of nyan cat. I'd use crayons for the tail. Below the bit about telling them to kill everything and then themselves.

vvv lol

Guavanaut fucked around with this message at 22:35 on Oct 1, 2015

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 22:32

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

OwlFancier posted:

Of course not, the EMP blasts from the high atmosphere detonations would probably wipe out most of the internet.

That's the point. It is the ultimate ironic joke.

I thought the original point was to create a network that could survive a nuclear first strike long enough to coordinate the land silos in the US?

:nyan:

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 22:38

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

30 seconds after the first strike devastates the United States, the last remnants of the Internet, the original ARPANET hardened core, begin routing signals to the active silos across the West.

The backup electronics come to life, receiving a signal for the first time in decades. The selector cam in a teleprinter begins ticking over and the paper begins to feed through as the final orders are delivered from a server buried deep in Wyoming.

code:

+        o     o       +        o
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_,------,      o 
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-|   /\_/\  
-_-_-_-_-_-_-~|__( ^ .^)  +     +  
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-""  ""      
+      o         o   +       o

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 22:48

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Oberleutnant posted:

Breaking my own vow never to engage in nukechat but all Corbs has to say is he'd plow the Trident funding into ballistic missile defence research and, surely, problem solved. You placate those who don't want to be left feeling vulnerable to nuclear bullying after giving up the Bomb (a position I entirely understand and sympathise with to some extent) while keeping defence spending up, and channeling it towards morally just methods of defence which aren't going to slaughter millions, and which could genuinely contribute to the peace and security of people everywhere.

Problem is, according to insane 50s MAD thinking which apparently a lot of nuclear powers still subscribe to, if any nuclear power was developing a perfect missile defense shield (or any non-nuclear power in close allegiance with a nuclear power) they would be able to hold the world to ransom with impunity. Therefore according to said logic the correct thing to do is first strike before they finish developing it because both sides being destroyed is better than one side being able to strike whenever they like.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2015 23:01

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Prince John posted:

Heh, so apparently it was in the Middle-East before WW1 and is now part of the Greater Middle East. I will consider myself schooled. I could have sworn we covered bits of Afghanistan in my Middle-East politics module though.

Yeah, it looks like the northern boundary of the Middle East as defined in the late 20th century (and still current) specifically cut off at the borders of the USSR. Otherwise there's no real reason why you couldn't say that the Turkmen SSR was part of the ME, in which Russia definitely did intervene politically.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 00:01

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

I've not properly been to London over a decade. Apparently it's not just the rent that's got worse.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 01:28

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Tesseraction posted:

Also today seemed relatively lacking in lovely news... or has my near-coma illness made me think as such?

Putin is stepping up his game in Syria and it's looking likely that the UK will have to make Serious Decisions. Yay, proxy wars.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 02:35

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Eh, if we as a species didn't have the todestrieb to do it during the 60s-80s, I highly doubt we're going to do it now.

The media is making a whole lot of fuss about "kindly old man rules out killing millions in absurd hypothetical" though.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 11:21

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

big scary monsters posted:

To be fair he only ruled out using Trident, as far as I know he hasn't changed his stance on extinction level meteor strikes.

I don't disagree with him there. It's the only way to make sure that we're not left with a world where the dominant superpowers are Argentina, Australia, South Africa, and a superbillionaire stronghold in New Zealand.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 12:04

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

tooterfish posted:

Typical loving leftist dreamer.

We have the technology to wipe out humanity now, but nooooooo, it's gotta be this pie in the sky bullshit or they take their toys home.

If Europe worked together on a Manhattan + Apollo scale we could weaponize the Philae project within two decades.

lol your biggest missile can destroy a whole county Russia. That's precious. *adjusts thrusters on Corbyn IV module attached to 10 gigatons of space rock*

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 12:27

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

I hope that Sadiq Khan wins the mayoral election because he seems like an okay person and also to see the reactions in the Freep thread.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 14:34

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Mr. Flunchy posted:

In his twenties Zac Goldsmith vanished into the Himalayas and spent six months living an ascetic existence in a monastic ashram. He emerged from this spiritual awakening as a prospective Conservative MP.

What a lovely enlightenment.

*lives a life of asceticism in a monastery*
Hmm, looks like austerity does make people productive.

*sits alone on a mountain ledge with nothing but rocks and ice for miles around*
Yup, not much unemployment around here.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 14:51

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 00:15

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Rolled Cabbage posted:

Khan is a tosspot who got given the shadow justice brief and then said he 'might' think about not slashing legal aid any further if Labour won the election.

How does he rank against the other mayoral candidates though? Best of a bad bunch? (Do Pigeon and the others have any hope in hell of winning?)

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 15:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Red October 2015: Basically D&D's Communist Motherbase

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