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Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

(thanks Pesky Splinter)

It's Happening!

Or maybe it isn't.

This is the month where Brexit deadline happens, where the Meaningful Vote happensgets pushed back to April, where extensions are asked for without reason given, and where, presumably, on March 29th the government claims that the dog ate their brexit. Simples.

Battleships Petropavlovsk and Sevastopol, March 1921, Kronstadt posted:

Our country is enduring a difficult moment. Hunger, cold and economic ruin have held us in an iron vice these three years already. The Communist Party, which rules the country, has become separated from the masses, and shown itself unable to lead her from her state of general ruin. It has not faced the reality of the disturbances which in recent times have occurred in Petrograd and Moscow. This unrest shows clearly enough that the party has lost the faith of the working masses. Neither has it recognized the demands presented by the workers. It considers them plots of the counter-revolution. It is deeply mistaken.
This unrest, these demands, are the voice of the people in its entirety, of all laborers. All workers, sailors and soldiers see clearly at the present moment that only through common effort, by the common will of the laborers, is it possible to give the country bread, wood, and coal, to dress the barefoot and naked, and to lead the Republic out of this dead end.
This will of all laborers, soldiers and sailors was definitively expressed at the Garrison Meeting of our town … in view of the fact that there were grounds to fear repression, and also due to threatening speeches by the representatives of authority, the Conference decided to form a Provisional Revolutionary Committee, to which to give all authority in governing the town and fortress.
Comrades and citizens! The Provisional Committee is deeply concerned that there should not be spilled a single drop of blood. It has taken emergency measures for the establishment of revolutionary order in the town and fortress, and at the forts. Comrades and citizens! Do not stop work. Workers, remain at your machines, sailors and soldiers in your units and at the forts. All Soviet workers and organizations must continue their work.
The Provisional Revolutionary Committee calls all workers’ organizations, all naval and trade unions, and all naval and military units and individual citizens to give it universal support and aid. The task of the Provisional Revolutionary Committee is a general, comradely effort to organize in the town and fortress means for proper and fair elections to a new Soviet. And so, comrades, to order, to calm, to restraint, and to a new Socialist construction for the good of all laborers.

In The News :sax:
• Arron Banks's Leave.EU and Eldon Insurance are fined £120,000 over data law breaches.
• Apetito and Bidfood, major suppliers to care homes and hospitals, report that they are stockpiling food in case of disruption caused by Brexit.
• Theresa May suffers another defeat in the Commons on her Brexit strategy, losing the vote by 303 to 258, also pushes back the 'Meaningful' Vote to mid-March.
• Thousands of school pupils around the UK go on strike to push for action on climate change.
• Seven Labour MPs resign to form The Independent Group and immediately do racism and GDPR violations everywhere. Three Tories later join them. Other very important minds resign.
• Sajid Javid announces that he will cop out of dealing with so-called ISIS Bride Shamima Begum, preferring to fob her off on whatever country can be forced to have her even if it violates international law, the chicken egg coward fucker.
• Corbyn folds under pressure from the TIGs (True Intelligant Geniouses) continues the plan from Conference and says he will support a second referendum if he can't get Labour's Brexit deal.
• New genius plan is to use the KFC chicken logistics guys to deliver medicines for the NHS post-Brexit.
• It's hot. Earth is dying again.
• Simples





All Sports March
UKMT February 2019 - Mermaids are coming for their sons genitals/I loving hate centrists
UKMT January 2019 - I think it might be satire but it's impossible to tell/What a loving mess
All Previous Threads (thanks Pesky Splinter)

Emblem of Unity March
Europol Thread
Scotpol Thread
Trainchat Thread
Political Cartoons Thread
BYOB: UKMT

March of the Soviet Tankmen
Venezuela Thread For Discussion of Venezuela

High School Cadets-March
Off the Fence - Brighton based, covering UK & Global topics. Pretty chill and professional peeps. Older 'casts can be found in the PLATFORM B archive.
Reel Politik - The Original Leftie Hate Trolls. Check 'em out.
We Don't Talk About The Weather - Two cool guys discuss news and other stuff. The UKMT-iest of Podcasts.
Desolation Radio - Socialism from a Welsh perspective. Informative hosts.
Revolutionary Despatches - Two new guys starting out.
Connected & Disaffected - Breezy discussions of lefty social, and historical topics, and news updates. Pretty Good.
Trashfuture - Theme of the week style podcast about capitalism and how much it fucks up. Cool podcasters, sometimes working with Reel Politik
Agitpod - Owen Jones & Ellie Mae O’Hagan discuss news.
Reasons to Be Cheerful - Former Labour leader Ed "Red Ed" Milliband and Geoff Lloyd shoot the poo poo, and discuss general politics. Sometimes with guests.
Novara Media - Numerous fluctucating commentators including Matt Zarb-Cousin, Max Shanly, and James Butler among others. Varying topics with guests.
[Citations Needed] - Covers the US, focussing on the media, PR, and assorted bullshit. Also some socialist history topics. Very informative.
Chapo House Media - More US focused, from a leftist perspective. Basically a US version of Reel Politik, but with better mics. Worth a listen.

The Signaller's March
Stop, Thief!: The Commons, Enclosures, And Resistance – Peter Linebaugh
Libertarian Communism – Isaac Puente Amestoy
At The Café – Malatesta
The Method of Freedom – Malatesta
In Praise of Idleness – Russell
Political Ideals – Russell
Declaration – Hardt and Negri
Liberalism, a Counter History – Domenico Losurdo
God and the State – Bakunin
The Conquest of Bread – Kropotkin
Imperialism, the Highest Stage of Capitalism – V I Lenin
Anarchism and Other Essays – Emma Goldman
Social Reform or Revolution – Rosa Luxemburg
Violence – Slavoj Zizek
Jihad vs. McWorld - Benjamin Barber
Crashed: How a Decade of Financial Crises Changed the World – Adam Tooze
Flat Earth News - Nick Davies
Hack Attack - Nick Davies
Ecology of Freedom – Murray Bookchin
Anarchism, Marxism and the Future of the Left – Murray Bookchin
Let's Read Das Kapital – Karl Marx and Goons

UKMT CLP Commissars (thanks feedmegin)

quote:

I came up with the idea of a register of goons and their CLPs in case any new joiners wanted someone to go to to get the local lie of the land.

Bexleyheath and Crayford - Rolled Cabbage
Bristol East - Luxury Tent Carpet
Bristol West - mfcrocker, Barry Foster, Pistol_Pete, Rarity
Broxtowe - MikeCrotch
Cotswolds (yes, we do have one) - Yvonmukluk
Cunninghame North/South - mehall ('s partner)
Dulwich and West Norwood - maugrim
Edinburgh Central (s?) - Autonomous Monster
Edinburgh Central, Ipswich - Lord of the Llamas
Enfield Southgate - spiderbot
Glasgow Southside/Central - Niric
Havant - Last Emperor
Hertford and Stortford - Brovine
Hyndburn - Kegluneq
Leeds North East - Irving Washington
Loughborough - feedmegin
Manchester Central - Jakabite
Northampton - superLINUS
North-East Somerset (the long-shot campaign to unseat Jacob Rees-Mogg) - Darth Walrus
Rochford and Southend East - DesperateDan
Salisbury (and Salisbury Momentum, which is now a thing that actually exists) - Wolfsbane
SE Cambridgeshire - Stoic Fnord
Sheffield south east - Cast_no_shadow
Southampton (Test) - waffle, Nova88
St Austell & Newquay - Oh dear me
Stockport Central - Taear
Swansea West - Borrovan
Watford - SpaceCommie

The Effortpost's Graveyard (thanks goddamnedtwisto and UKMT goons)

Join us on synIRC for Question Time Awfulness and Stuff
#ukgoons on synIRC (thanks crispix).

Lightning Knight posted:

:siren: Also after discussing it with CB and amongst ourselves, we’ve decided we won’t punish people just for mentioning pissflaps anymore as long as it doesn’t cause an extended derail. What constitutes “an extended derail” is up to interpretation. :siren:

Pissflaps is still banned from the thread tho because lol he bad.

learnincurve posted:

Need something added to every OP. DWP have been told not to tell sanctioned people about this.

If you get sanctioned then to prevent your housing and council tax benefits falling like a house of cards, and in some case get access to a utility bill fund, call your local council for a "Nil Income Form".



https://twitter.com/archivetvmus71/status/1090310637102747648

Dawn of March 1st.

28 days remain.

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Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
In before the impending apocalypse :toot:

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
Many thanks to the previous thread for teaching me that Blue Labour exists.

I've seen individuals and politicians advocate for Labour to "appeal to the working classes" but I never knew it was an organised thing.

Flipswitch
Mar 30, 2010


Bloody hell it's March

Pershing
Feb 21, 2010

John "Black Jack" Pershing
Hard Fucking Core

Ok so what the gently caress is the thing with the parachute and the burning Union Jack?

ShaneMacGowansTeeth
May 22, 2007



I think this is it... I think this is how it ends
I GOT A SUGGESTION IN THE OP, I CAN DIE HAPPY WHEN THE BREXIT COMES!

Pershing posted:

Ok so what the gently caress is the thing with the parachute and the burning Union Jack?

vegan sausage roll

Mugsbaloney
Jul 11, 2012

We prefer your extinction to the loss of our job

Vegan sausage roll

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

A vegan sausage roll presenting as femme.

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

OwlFancier posted:

A vegan sausage roll presenting as femme.
Glinner and Morgan will join forces over this.

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose
I'm truly sorry your government doesn't know how to not kill you all.

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
https://twitter.com/DawnHFoster/status/1101276271856762880

marktheando
Nov 4, 2006

I’ve been in Germany this week, it’s been fun seeing the wide eyes and shocked expressions of my German friends as I explain Brexit to them. “Yes it’s always been within our power to cancel it” got the biggest reaction.

I was shocked by the low (ie similar to Britain pre-2010) number of homeless people in Leipzig, I guess I had got used to passing 5 or 6 homeless people on my 15 minute walk to work.

And thanks Shakey Beef for the Leipzig DDR museum recommendations, very interesting experience since I’m largely ignorant of that period in Germany.

NotJustANumber99
Feb 15, 2012

somehow that last av was even worse than your posting
Great Britain is an awesome place for cool dudes. OK thx bye

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

I'm truly sorry your government doesn't know how to not kill you all.

They know. They just don't care enough to do it.

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



Posting on the first page of the UK last thread

Looking forward to next months England + Wales MT

marktheando
Nov 4, 2006

NotJustANumber99 posted:

Great Britain is an awesome place for cool dudes. OK thx bye

Stop lying about my country.

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose

Darth Walrus posted:

They know. They just don't care enough to do it.

Have you considered dosing them with anti-depressants on the sly?

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Have you considered dosing them with anti-depressants on the sly?

Oh, they're already very happy and satisfied with their New Zealand doomsday bunkers.

JosefStalinator
Oct 9, 2007

Come Tbilisi if you want to live.




Grimey Drawer
Ignorant American here - I read about these independent group dummies, are they actually running a full slate of candidates or are they just playing spoiler in the particular districts where their members defected?

NotJustANumber99
Feb 15, 2012

somehow that last av was even worse than your posting

JosefStalinator posted:

Ignorant American here - I read about these independent group dummies, are they actually running a full slate of candidates or are they just playing spoiler in the particular districts where their members defected?

Theres nowhere for them to run yet

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012

JosefStalinator posted:

Ignorant American here - I read about these independent group dummies, are they actually running a full slate of candidates or are they just playing spoiler in the particular districts where their members defected?

They'll probably look to expand into a proper party, but if they can't do that, their plan is to run in Labour marginals, not their own seats (because their own constituents hate them).

Mantis42
Jul 26, 2010

why is the tater tot british anyways?

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
At the minute they're going to nando's and giving themselves titular pats on the back.

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012

Mantis42 posted:

why is the tater tot british anyways?

It's not.

The vegan sausage roll, on the other hand, is extremely British.

Pesky Splinter
Feb 16, 2011

A worried pug.
Woot! Thank for including my lazy Brexit Evony banner.

Also don't think I didn't notice the "simples" at the end of the first paragraph :argh:

Shamesless self promotion on the breakdown of the The Independant Group people for people wondering who these loving nobodies are.

Mantis42 posted:

why is the tater tot british anyways?

U wot m8

[e]: Ooooh, the sausage roll puff dogs vegan sausage roll. Basically Piers Morgan gave Greggs (a bakery) massive publicity for having a poo poo fit over a vegan sausage roll, resulting in people being aware of it.

Pesky Splinter fucked around with this message at 01:48 on Mar 1, 2019

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



I did not like the vegan sausage roll. And greggs veg slices are shite.

It, and Costa, can gently caress off.

Fight me.

sebzilla
Mar 17, 2009

Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.


lol at us forever

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

I mean lol @ us for most of the month I guess. Then probably screaming.

Iymarra
Oct 4, 2010




Survived AGDQ 2018 Awful Games block!
Grimey Drawer
Finally bit the bullet and got off my rear end. Membership paid for the labour party for one year.

I live in fife, scotland. Anyone got any knowledge of the CLP there or whatnot?

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
I have coeliacs disease.

I have never been to greggs.

forkboy84
Jun 13, 2012

Corgis love bread. And Puro


JosefStalinator posted:

Ignorant American here - I read about these independent group dummies, are they actually running a full slate of candidates or are they just playing spoiler in the particular districts where their members defected?

It depends. If there's a general election in the next 12 months I think it'll basically be the current TIG MPs. And the rumour is they won't actually run in the seats they currently hold, instead they want to run in potential Conservative to Labour swing seats purely to stop Labour from picking them up. But if there's no election before the next mandatory date of 2022 then yeah, I'd suspect they'll run as many candidates as they can muster, which probably still won't be a full slate because who the gently caress wants to be in the Stop Brexit Party years after we've already slipped out of the EU with No Deal, assuming they even still exist and haven't just merged with the Lib Dems.

But it's also hard to work out because they keep insisting they don't stand for anything, which is new politics apparently and not totally vapid bollocks

Iymarra posted:

Finally bit the bullet and got off my rear end. Membership paid for the labour party for one year.

I live in fife, scotland. Anyone got any knowledge of the CLP there or whatnot?

There'll be multiple in Fife I'd have thought, but you shouldn't need to worry, you should get a membership card which if I remember right contains constituency party info (mine hasn't been out of my wallet in forever and I'm about to go to bed so can't confirm) but I also got an email from the Secretary of my local CLP when I joined so I'd imagine that's normal.

forkboy84 fucked around with this message at 02:18 on Mar 1, 2019

Munin
Nov 14, 2004


What the gently caress is going on in this cartoon btw?
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/picture/2019/feb/28/steve-bell-on-tom-watsons-response-to-antisemitism-cartoon

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

I would assume it's a reference to a postwar demob poster, presumably with the message "let's deflate tom watson"

JFairfax
Oct 23, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Brexit baby!

JosefStalinator
Oct 9, 2007

Come Tbilisi if you want to live.




Grimey Drawer

forkboy84 posted:

It depends. If there's a general election in the next 12 months I think it'll basically be the current TIG MPs. And the rumour is they won't actually run in the seats they currently hold, instead they want to run in potential Conservative to Labour swing seats purely to stop Labour from picking them up. But if there's no election before the next mandatory date of 2022 then yeah, I'd suspect they'll run as many candidates as they can muster, which probably still won't be a full slate because who the gently caress wants to be in the Stop Brexit Party years after we've already slipped out of the EU with No Deal, assuming they even still exist and haven't just merged with the Lib Dems.

But it's also hard to work out because they keep insisting they don't stand for anything, which is new politics apparently and not totally vapid bollocks


There'll be multiple in Fife I'd have thought, but you shouldn't need to worry, you should get a membership card which if I remember right contains constituency party info (mine hasn't been out of my wallet in forever and I'm about to go to bed so can't confirm) but I also got an email from the Secretary of my local CLP when I joined so I'd imagine that's normal.

This makes sense. Given what you've said, it also sounds like there's a non-zero possibility that with enough time they just totally fizzle out and barely have any impact, but it sounds very goddamn stupid.

I'm sorry that our (US) politics are doing their best to one up each other in how loving stupid they can be.

GeeCee
Dec 16, 2004

:scotland::glomp:

"You're going to be...amazing."
Strapping in for a fun month on the Brexit ride to hell. :suicide:

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
everything crossed for a people's vote.

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

second referndum and leave wins again :v:

MrFlibble
Nov 28, 2007

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Fallen Rib
Hey it's my birthday this month, and my next dentists appointment isn't until April.

You know, other than Brexit loving destroying everything at the end of the month i'd say things are looking up.

OwlFancier posted:

second referndum and leave wins again :v:

This is what would happen.

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Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021

OwlFancier posted:

second referndum and leave wins again :v:

If it doesn't there'll be tiki torches in the streets.

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