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vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Frank Lampard is going to get Everton relegated

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vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

ozmunkeh posted:

I don’t think it’s worth overreacting to any of this. Probably the most sensible thing to do would be to disband the club, void all fraudulent honours, level the stadium and replace it with a low cost housing development. No need to go nuts.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
the one thing uniting us in these trying international times is that everyone everywhere hates manchester city

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

pik_d posted:

Yeah it's hard to quantify any direct impact it'll have on the players during the game but Pep has been getting questions about it in the press interview. Sometimes the press does get to the players though. That's why good managers will always try and deflect pressure away from them.

I feel like there's a difference between this and a manager deflecting pressure by blaming the ref instead of saying "yeah we lost because my players are all poo poo"

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
We're workshopping the chants now, it's come down to a choice between "Ooooooh, underage players were allegedly pressured to sign contracts with Manchester City through monetary payments, in violation of the rules, and you know you are" and "Olé, olé olé olé, club sponsors in Abu Dhabi are suspected of having provided only a portion of their payments to the club themselves, with the majority apparently coming from Sheikh Mansour himself, olé."

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Jurgen Klopp, in the dressing room at halftime: all right lads, keep it up, great work so far, love the energy in the pressing. And remember what we're playing for - Roberto Mancini, who is currently the trainer for the Italian national team but spent the years from 2009 to 2013 as the trainer for ManCity, is thought to have received a significant portion of his compensation secretly by way of a fictitious consultancy contract.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
When pundits say someone is young they mean "I have never heard of this person before."

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

jesus WEP posted:

burnley are proper hosed now lol. hope dyche gets a decent job somewhere, he’s a good lad imo

yeah, he did a good job keeping Burnley up as long as he did and frankly I don't see how another manager is going to help them. Not sure sacking a longstanding manager who built the club in their own image ever leads to such a drastic immediate improvements in results that it could keep a club up with eight games to play

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
2013-14 was a bad one, I remember being top of the table at Christmas and all the headlines about how every team that had been top of the table at Christmas went on to win the league and then we immediately lost two games back to back which was pretty much peak boom bust for me lol

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aCq0asRPJM

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
that's awful :(

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

the sex ghost posted:

Manchester the city of bald frauds

this, this!!!

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

lol

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
after their first defeat it'll be "He should be tried in the Hag"

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Dunno anything about his personal life but they'll do a photo shoot of a wife/girlfriend and title it "Erik's 10 WAG"

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Rangnick's apparently said Pogba's probably done for the season which means those 10 minutes against Liverpool were probably his last in a United kit.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Dear New Manager, I'm afraid they're all poo poo. Kind regards – and good luck! Ralf.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Maybe if Pickford is playing in the Championship he'll finally stop starting for England

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

the sex ghost posted:

critical richarlison theory

lol

*frank lampard serious face* no but seriously though Gordon was diving if a Liverpool player so much as came within six feet of him yesterday so I don't blame either the ref or the VAR for looking at that, saying "there's not much in it" and telling him to get on with play

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
also theoretically VAR is supposed to be to correct clear and obvious errors by the live ref and for once it actually worked the way it was supposed to in giving the benefit of the doubt to the ref's initial decision instead of poring over pixels for ten minutes to decide if this time there was actually a tiny bit of contact when the player went flying after feeling the slightest breeze

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

Eric Cantonese posted:

I think they had hit a horrific patch of form so fans were right to be concerned about relegation.

Benitez was doomed. Everton needed fan positivity and strong morale and instead Moshiri went with a guy that the fans were never going to be patient with.

As soon as Der Spiegel reported that Usmanov was subject to Russian sanctions the players' morale collapsed

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

greazeball posted:

What makes you think Newcastle won't go completely off the rails? This will be their first summer transfer window and you know their fans will want a big signing to show the ownership's commitment. Rice may not be flashy enough for them, I guess. Do you think they'll be raiding PSG, Bayern and Juve for cast-offs or will they try to hijack somebody's Big Summer Signing?

Mbappe to Newcastle

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

Tweeting through his own death, truly a legend

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Excellent news, he's the best manager we've had in my lifetime and I hope he stays forever

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Consulting for Man U over Zoom while getting some sun on the slopes of the Alps in the Outback, living the dream

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

Crazy Ted posted:

Look...

I don't know how much Manchester United is paying him but for advice like that it's clearly not enough.

lmao

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

Eau de MacGowan posted:

Ralf owns, getting seven, maybe eight figures out of United for six months of going "not my fault, everything was hosed when I got here"

not my fault, everything was hosed when I got here, in the future consider signing players like Haaland, okay see ya later

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
RIP Mino, the Directors of Football of the world are breathing a sigh of relief today

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

Crazy Ted posted:

He disrupted the flow of coin to the money changers and died twice. Sound familiar?

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

bewbies posted:

leveraged buyouts are such a bizarre concept

like theoretically I could buy manchester united, using the value of manchester united as the collateral for the massive loan I took out to buy manchester united

point being we could all be owners of big time sports teams if we wanted

yeah it rules

You tell a bank "I want you to buy Manchester United for me, and in return I will pay you back the entire value of Manchester United plus interest. As collateral, I offer to sell Manchester United if necessary to pay you back." Then they give you the money, the current owner gets paid the actual value of the club so they don't care whether it's cash you had lying around or a loan you secured through this byzantine system, and then you suck out all the profits from Manchester United to pay off the loan you took to buy the club in the first place

The trick is not knowing how the system works, the trick is already being rich and connected enough that the bank is willing to give you the money

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
welp

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Where's Der Spiegel when you need them?

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

He's right, the new CL format is bad

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

Total Meatlove posted:

He’s gonna look like Gandalf in front of the hobbits

The Fellowship of Erling

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Quit India Movement leader Mahatma Gandhi wants his struggling country to take inspiration from the likes of Jesse Marsch, Sam Allardyce, and Tony Pulis in their attempt to achieve independence from the British Empire.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Pep is a **** fraud

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

the sex ghost posted:

It's been a rough Maypril but just one more round of fixtures and we can all look forward to the world cup next month 😎

this hurts, but watching the last few rounds of games I've been almost glad that the World Cup is delayed because a lot of players look completely exhausted and it's probably good for them to get a summer off

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Origi is leaving to join Milan when his contract expires this summer

Not a done deal yet but he seems certain to leave, Klopp's already eulogizing him.

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vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

lol lets do it

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