tech bubble: Make someone ugly cry. Adobe can help.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > tech bubble: Make someone ugly cry. Adobe can help.

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pointers: Sep 4, 2008

staaaaaaaaaaahhhhhp

# ? Dec 14, 2014 03:34

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# ? May 15, 2024 16:30

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

please stop committing blood libel against uber

# ? Dec 14, 2014 03:43

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

because the beauty of the tech bubble thread must not perish from the earth.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 03:43

pointers: Sep 4, 2008

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

techies are the real racists

# ? Dec 14, 2014 03:50

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

i thought we alrady had a t word

# ? Dec 14, 2014 03:54

Sniep: Mar 28, 2004; All I needed was that fatty blunt...

King of Breakfast

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

i thought we alrady had a t word

yeah, it's "the" or "that"

"The computer guy"

"That guy that made it work last time"

it's always the or that guy's fault.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 03:56

FamDav: Mar 29, 2008

there's cjs yospos, PL/terrible programmer yospos, and fyad yospos.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:25

FamDav: Mar 29, 2008

cjs yospos should be moved to gbs
pl yospos should be moved into coc
fyad yospos should be moved into inspect your gadgets

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:27

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

backseat moderator yosposters should be moved to kittyjail

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:29

born on a buy you: Aug 14, 2005; Odd Fullback
Bird Gang
Sack Them All

if you haven't been around for at least 4 Tori gimmick :frogout:

imo

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:36

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

Why the Web Won't Be Nirvana

comin atcha aaaallllll the way from 1995

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:45

Optimus_Rhyme: Apr 15, 2007; are you that mainframe hacker guy?

waddup ma t-words

also, Clifford Stoll was proto-yospos. If YOSPOS had someone be the first, its him.

poo poo, after the cuckoos egg he wrote a whole book (Silicon Snake Oil) basically telling everyone how lovely the internet was and to just go outside. But not like an 'I don't get how this works' thing. He was actually immersed in the internet, the culture at the time in 'cyberspace (just basically The Well)' and all that.

There's a whole chapter talking about how 'Colossal Cave Adventure' was a colossal waste of time and that nerds should be spelunking for real.

:allears:

my english teacher made me read that for extra credit cause I finished our assigned book in a weekend (it was enders game, that was a the first 'good' assigned book i'd ever read) and I was all 'the internet is the future' and basically on my way to full internet evangelist. I hated the book at the time and disagreed with it until about halfway through when teenage me was like 'hey, YA! Why am I causing netsplits and looking for banks on datapac all the time when I could be going to parties my friends are throwing and drinking/smoking/skiing/biking'.

What I'm saying is thanks Stoll for being a cool proto-yospos poster.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:57

Slow-Scan Shep: Jul 11, 2001

what is clifford stoll up to these days

# ? Dec 14, 2014 04:59

Farecoal: Oct 15, 2011; There he go

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

Why the Web Won't Be Nirvana

comin atcha aaaallllll the way from 1995

quote:

Then there's cyberbusiness. We're promised instant catalog shopping�just point and click for great deals. We'll order airline tickets over the network, make restaurant reservations and negotiate sales contracts. Stores will become obselete. So how come my local mall does more business in an afternoon than the entire Internet handles in a month?

lol

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:01

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

papa_november posted:

what is clifford stoll up to these days

someone in here bought one of his bottles earlier this year

iirc it was his klein beer stein and he included a buncha pictures and stuff with it

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:03

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

iirc it was his klein beer stein and he included a buncha pictures and stuff with it

a kleinstein eh?

sounds like a smart purchase

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:12

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

Sagebrush posted:

lol @ u defending h p because you're also a rich fuckoid from the south

except where hp's racism and wealth-flaunting is cheeky and fun, etc etc supertroopers you're the fatass everyone hates.

hahaha yeah, you're so much better as an oblivious doctor's son from another country that moved to the most expensive city in North America for fun

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:29

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

born on a buy you posted:

if you haven't been around for at least 4 Tori gimmick imo

Thank you.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:29

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

y'all really need to ease off of the nerd on nerd violence and remember that each of you paid :10bux:

to post on an internet forum

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:34

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

Citizen Tayne posted:

hahaha yeah, you're so much better as an oblivious doctor's son from another country that moved to the most expensive city in North America for fun

this made me nod sagely

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:39

born on a buy you: Aug 14, 2005; Odd Fullback
Bird Gang
Sack Them All

he's a Canadian doctor though. they're basically nurse practitioners.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:43

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

born on a buy you posted:

he's a Canadian doctor though. they're basically nurse practitioners.

this made me shake my head derisively

# ? Dec 14, 2014 05:44

kitten emergency: Jan 13, 2008; get meow this wack-ass crystal prison

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

Why the Web Won't Be Nirvana

comin atcha aaaallllll the way from 1995

shingy in forty years dot JPEG

# ? Dec 14, 2014 06:05

Elder Postsman: Aug 30, 2000; i used hot bot to search for "teens"

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

y'all really need to ease off of the nerd on nerd violence and remember that each of you paid to post on an internet forum

lmao if u didn't join when it was still free

# ? Dec 14, 2014 06:12

BONGHITZ: Jan 1, 1970

Optimus_Rhyme posted:

(it was enders game, that was a the first 'good' assigned book i'd ever read)

lol

# ? Dec 14, 2014 06:29

carry on then: Jul 10, 2010; by VideoGames
(and can't post for 10 years!)

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

y'all really need to ease off of the nerd on nerd violence and remember that each of you paid to post on an internet forum

nerds deserve all violence inflicted on them

if other nerds are doing it that just means less work for fit, attractive, interesting people

# ? Dec 14, 2014 06:29

Phobeste: Apr 9, 2006; never, like, count out Touchdown Tom, man

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

faux shoah

again with the antisemitism

# ? Dec 14, 2014 06:41

pagancow: Jan 15, 2001; Video Stymie

Elder Postsman posted:

lmao if u didn't join when it was still free

2000-2001 crew rep

# ? Dec 14, 2014 06:56

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK: Sep 11, 2008; Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola
-Cheap Trick; Nap Ghost

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

Why the Web Won't Be Nirvana

comin atcha aaaallllll the way from 1995

quote:

Consider today�s online world. The Usenet, a worldwide bulletin board, allows anyone to post messages across the nation. Your word gets out, leapfrogging editors and publishers. Every voice can be heard cheaply and instantly. The result? Every voice is heard. The cacophany more closely resembles citizens band radio, complete with handles, harrasment, and anonymous threats. When most everyone shouts, few listen. How about electronic publishing? Try reading a book on disc. At best, it�s an unpleasant chore: the myopic glow of a clunky computer replaces the friendly pages of a book. And you can�t tote that laptop to the beach. Yet Nicholas Negroponte, director of the MIT Media Lab, predicts that we�ll soon buy books and newspapers straight over the Intenet. Uh, sure.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 07:36

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK: Sep 11, 2008; Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola
-Cheap Trick; Nap Ghost

gently caress it, entire thing

Clifford Stoll posted:

The Internet? Bah!
Hype alert: Why cyberspace isn�t, and will never be, nirvana

After two decades online, I�m perplexed. It�s not that I haven�t had a gas of a good time on the Internet. I�ve met great people and even caught a hacker or two. But today, I�m uneasy about this most trendy and oversold community. Visionaries see a future of telecommuting workers, interactive libraries and multimedia classrooms. They speak of electronic town meetings and virtual communities. Commerce and business will shift from offices and malls to networks and modems. And the freedom of digital networks will make government more democratic.Baloney.

Do our computer pundits lack all common sense? The truth in no online database will replace your daily newspaper, no CD-ROM can take the place of a competent teacher and no computer network will change the way government works.

Consider today�s online world. The Usenet, a worldwide bulletin board, allows anyone to post messages across the nation. Your word gets out, leapfrogging editors and publishers. Every voice can be heard cheaply and instantly. The result? Every voice is heard. The cacophany more closely resembles citizens band radio, complete with handles, harrasment, and anonymous threats. When most everyone shouts, few listen. How about electronic publishing? Try reading a book on disc. At best, it�s an unpleasant chore: the myopic glow of a clunky computer replaces the friendly pages of a book. And you can�t tote that laptop to the beach. Yet Nicholas Negroponte, director of the MIT Media Lab, predicts that we�ll soon buy books and newspapers straight over the Intenet. Uh, sure.

What the Internet hucksters won�t tell you is tht the Internet is one big ocean of unedited data, without any pretense of completeness. Lacking editors, reviewers or critics, the Internet has become a wasteland of unfiltered data. You don�t know what to ignore and what�s worth reading. Logged onto the World Wide Web, I hunt for the date of the Battle of Trafalgar. Hundreds of files show up, and it takes 15 minutes to unravel them�one�s a biography written by an eighth grader, the second is a computer game that doesn�t work and the third is an image of a London monument. None answers my question, and my search is periodically interrupted by messages like, �Too many connectios, try again later.�

Won�t the Internet be useful in governing? Internet addicts clamor for government reports. But when Andy Spano ran for county executive in Westchester County, N.Y., he put every press release and position paper onto a bulletin board. In that affluent county, with plenty of computer companies, how many voters logged in? Fewer than 30. Not a good omen.

Point and click:Then there are those pushing computers into schools. We�re told that multimedia will make schoolwork easy and fun. Students will happily learn from animated characters while taught by expertly tailored software.Who needs teachers when you�ve got computer-aided education? Bah. These expensive toys are difficult to use in classrooms and require extensive teacher training. Sure, kids love videogames�but think of your own experience: can you recall even one educational filmstrip of decades past? I�ll bet you remember the two or three great teachers who made a difference in your life.

Then there�s cyberbusiness. We�re promised instant catalog shopping�just point and click for great deals. We�ll order airline tickets over the network, make restaurant reservations and negotiate sales contracts. Stores will become obselete. So how come my local mall does more business in an afternoon than the entire Internet handles in a month? Even if there were a trustworthy way to send money over the Internet�which there isn�t�the network is missing a most essential ingredient of capitalism: salespeople.

What�s missing from this electronic wonderland? Human contact. Discount the fawning techno-burble about virtual communities. Computers and networks isolate us from one another. A network chat line is a limp substitute for meeting friends over coffee. No interactive multimedia display comes close to the excitement of a live concert. And who�d prefer cybersex to the real thing? While the Internet beckons brightly, seductively flashing an icon of knowledge-as-power, this nonplace lures us to surrender our time on earth. A poor substitute it is, this virtual reality where frustration is legion and where�in the holy names of Education and Progress�important aspects of human interactions are relentlessly devalued.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 07:38

FamDav: Mar 29, 2008

if you consider it in terms of what people were promising in the late 90s then it sounds p reasonable.

if he thought none of that would happen in the next couple of decades then lol to that dude

# ? Dec 14, 2014 07:53

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

ayn rand hand job posted:

gently caress it, entire thing

this is like yospos.txt

# ? Dec 14, 2014 08:06

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud: Apr 7, 2003

Sagebrush posted:

this made me nod sagely

I don't think you realize how privileged you are.

# ? Dec 14, 2014 08:09

Forums Terrorist: Dec 8, 2011

i got a score of -20 on that privilege checker thing, can i lol at them for being rich bigoted fucks tori?

# ? Dec 14, 2014 08:16

Progressive JPEG: Feb 19, 2003

Cliff Stoll is super cool, if you buy one if his Klein bottles he stores them in a crawlspace in his place. He used to just crawl in there to get em out to be mailed but it's rough on his back so he built a radio controlled forklift robot with a camera on it to get them out

# ? Dec 14, 2014 08:32

Thesoro: Dec 6, 2005; YOU CANNOT LEARN
TO WHISTLE

quote:

Consider today�s online world. The Usenet, a worldwide bulletin board, allows anyone to post messages across the nation. Your word gets out, leapfrogging editors and publishers. Every voice can be heard cheaply and instantly. The result? Every voice is heard. The cacophany more closely resembles citizens band radio, complete with handles, harrasment, and anonymous threats. When most everyone shouts, few listen. How about electronic publishing? Try reading a book on disc. At best, it�s an unpleasant chore: the myopic glow of a clunky computer replaces the friendly pages of a book. And you can�t tote that laptop to the beach. Yet Nicholas Negroponte, director of the MIT Media Lab, predicts that we�ll soon buy books and newspapers straight over the Intenet. Uh, sure.

it's amazing how exactly this guy is 50% completely right and 50% utterly wrong

# ? Dec 14, 2014 09:30

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

Thesoro posted:

it's amazing how exactly this guy is 50% completely right and 50% utterly wrong

like i said, it's pure yospos

completely unable to picture the societal and technical changes that will make all these absurd, ridiculous, mockable technological ideas commonplace in a generation

# ? Dec 14, 2014 09:34

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

Phobeste posted:

again with the antisemitism

congratulations :thejoke:

# ? Dec 14, 2014 09:34

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

infernal machines posted:

like i said, it's pure yospos

agreedo

# ? Dec 14, 2014 09:35

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# ? May 15, 2024 16:30

Main Paineframe: Oct 27, 2010

Thesoro posted:

it's amazing how exactly this guy is 50% completely right and 50% utterly wrong

yeah, but even the 50% he got wrong is kind of understandable considering wi-fi hadn't even been invented yet. even aside from the whole "march of technology" thing, it took some fairly non-obvious paradigm shifts to get the things we have today. a full ten years after he'd written that, blackberry dominated the smartphone market and laptops were still clunky, heavy jokes (netbooks weren't even around yet at that point)

then two years after that, steve invented the iphone, and then the next year he went and invented the macbook air, and all of a sudden the entire electronics industry was making "useful consumer portable computing" their number one priority. technology isn't really what kicked off the current portables boom so much as it was someone deciding to revolutionize the industry

# ? Dec 14, 2014 10:18

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > tech bubble: Make someone ugly cry. Adobe can help.

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