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Edmund Lava
Sep 8, 2004

Hey, I'm from Brooklyn. I'm going to call myself Mr. Friendly.


I saw this coming the second I saw this link and it was still wonderful.

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Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008

Robert Denby
Sep 9, 2007
Denial isn't just a river in Egypt, huh? Nah, get fucked mate.
American Voices: Caitlyn Jenner Halloween Costume Sparks Outrage


Its like they just grabbed a quote from goons.txt.

Krinkle
Feb 9, 2003

Ah do believe Ah've got the vapors...
Ah mean the farts


Holy smokes this latest clickventure reminds me of a really simple "Clever Waste of Time" page. I didn't get it until it bashed me over the head with "source"

Echo Chamber
Oct 16, 2008

best username/post combo
This day in history:

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


Sex-Positive Culture Still Has A Long Way To Go Before It Catches Up With My Weird And Baffling Penis

Wiggy Marie
Jan 16, 2006

Meep!

Echo Chamber posted:

This day in history:


As someone who actually works at Oak Ridge National Lab and had a conversation just last week about how impressively unknown the DOE has kept that lab, the bottom right article warms my heart.

Orange Fluffy Sheep
Jul 26, 2008

Bad EXP received

Echo Chamber posted:

This day in history:


T. Herman Zweibel shows up in their books as the hateful ancient curmudgeon who owns The Onion. In the Book of Known Knowledge he forbid them from publishing entries on Jewess, Labor Unions, and the color blue, among others. All were motivated by petty personal spite.

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005


Orange Fluffy Sheep posted:

T. Herman Zweibel shows up in their books as the hateful ancient curmudgeon who owns The Onion. In the Book of Known Knowledge he forbid them from publishing entries on Jewess, Labor Unions, and the color blue, among others. All were motivated by petty personal spite.

He used to have a regular feature year ago but they decided the joke had run it's course and ended it by shooting him into space.

ZDar Fan
Oct 15, 2012

Progress! This Video Game’s Protagonist Is A Deaf Woman

Krinkle
Feb 9, 2003

Ah do believe Ah've got the vapors...
Ah mean the farts



Chris Chan is going to poo poo. She will definitely not get satire and will go paint some arms blue in protest at kb toys or some poo poo because of this.

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008


I'm actaully a little disappointed it wasn't a video of a fire truck.

SimonChris
Apr 24, 2008

The Baron's daughter is missing, and you are the man to find her. No problem. With your inexhaustible arsenal of hard-boiled similes, there is nothing you can't handle.
Grimey Drawer
He's Palestinian. She's Israeli. Both Of Them Incorrectly Summarize The Movie 'Blade'

This was linked at the end of the deaf woman protagonist video, and I can't believe it hasn't been posted yet.

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin

Evil Mastermind posted:

I'm actaully a little disappointed it wasn't a video of a fire truck.

I know! There have been a few where I was really hoping for a fire engine.

Fight Club Sandwich
Apr 29, 2006

you want a piece of me???

SimonChris posted:

He's Palestinian. She's Israeli. Both Of Them Incorrectly Summarize The Movie 'Blade'

This was linked at the end of the deaf woman protagonist video, and I can't believe it hasn't been posted yet.

pro click

The MSJ
May 17, 2010

Help close the eyes of these dead people.

http://www.clickhole.com/splitpic/gently-close-eyes-newly-deceased-2926

RedneckwithGuns
Mar 28, 2007

Up Next:
Fifteen Inches of
SHEER DYNAMITE

Jesus gently caress

http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/s..._source=twitter

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin

quote:

genitals look like Cthulhu sneezing in a defective ladder factory

This is another one of those articles that must have been really fun to write.

MariusLecter
Sep 5, 2009

NI MUERTE NI MIEDO
‏@ClickHole Check it out! #MitchHedbergAMA

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008


He totally would have appreciated the joke.

I have to admit, I'm not a sports fan but this one's kind of adorable: Linda Cohn Finds Tim Kurkjian’s Design For Baseball Card Of Himself In Office Printer

Omnomnomnivore
Nov 14, 2010

I'm swiftly moving toward a solution which pleases nobody! YEAGGH!

This is good but feels like a pale echo of this masterpiece: http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/i-put-fat-suit-understand-what-its-be-your-mom-2061. It is only 6 months old but deserves a repost.

StandardVC10
Feb 6, 2007

This avatar now 50% more dark mode compliant
Frenzied Trump Supporters Admit They'd Be Just As Happy Tearing Him To Pieces

Good but I was really expecting this image.

MariusLecter
Sep 5, 2009

NI MUERTE NI MIEDO

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin
This is an older one, but I just saw it:

Quiz: The Way This Dying Mother Said Goodbye To Her Kids Will Bring You To Tears

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008

A World Without War: Move The Slider To Turn These Soldiers Into Jukeboxes!

KillHour
Oct 28, 2007



I love ones where it's basically "We don't know how to use our own website. Did we do it right?" Like my grandpa trying to figure out Facebook.

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin

KillHour posted:

I love ones where it's basically "We don't know how to use our own website. Did we do it right?" Like my grandpa trying to figure out Facebook.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-biLk4RX8A

Fellatio del Toro
Mar 21, 2009

KillHour
Oct 28, 2007



:aaaaa:

Fezziwig
Jun 7, 2011

:perfect:

He looks so accomplished. The archaeologist, not the son.

Hello Sailor
May 3, 2006

we're all mad here

Can You Keep An Eye On The Pope For Just 5 Minutes?

"But, hey, at least you had the grand European adventure you’d always wanted. And you got to do something that some people go their whole lives without experiencing: chasing the Pope to Heaven and rescuing him from a belligerent angel orgy."

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin

Hello Sailor posted:

Can You Keep An Eye On The Pope For Just 5 Minutes?

"But, hey, at least you had the grand European adventure you’d always wanted. And you got to do something that some people go their whole lives without experiencing: chasing the Pope to Heaven and rescuing him from a belligerent angel orgy."

Well, the good news is that you’re finally going to have that big European adventure you wanted: You got arrested and are now being taken to a weird foreign jail. Have fun, ya fuckin’ lunatic.

Felix_Cat
Sep 15, 2008
You throw elbows left and right, but you’re swiftly dispatched by the team of elite sword-wielding guards who have filed into the room to subdue you. The Pope continues staring at you wordlessly, and just before you’re hauled out of the room, he gazes directly into your eyes and gives you a little wink.

That loving rascal.

SCheeseman
Apr 23, 2003


This will be an actual product in 5 years. Mark my words.

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005


Hello Sailor posted:

Can You Keep An Eye On The Pope For Just 5 Minutes?

"But, hey, at least you had the grand European adventure you’d always wanted. And you got to do something that some people go their whole lives without experiencing: chasing the Pope to Heaven and rescuing him from a belligerent angel orgy."

I like the ending where you just stay in Heaven doing angel drugs.

Space Kablooey
May 6, 2009


God ate me and shat me out as a piano.


edit: The Pope forgot to do his aikido roll. :cripes:

Space Kablooey has a new favorite as of 02:19 on Sep 6, 2015

darkwasthenight
Jan 7, 2011

GENE TRAITOR
The Pope pissed himself in petty revenge for me not allowing him to go to the bathroom and I was summarily thrown from the Vatican for crimes against the Church.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


quote:

You book it down the alley but discover that it is, annoyingly, a dead end. At the end of the alley, however, is a large, unassuming wooden door, and while you have no idea where it leads, perhaps it might afford you a quiet place to lay low. The cops are quickly catching up to you, so you had better make a decision fast.

> Pretend you are an innocent, unarmed black man and hope the cops ignore you.

Um...that’s a bad idea. Just go through the door.

SimonChris
Apr 24, 2008

The Baron's daughter is missing, and you are the man to find her. No problem. With your inexhaustible arsenal of hard-boiled similes, there is nothing you can't handle.
Grimey Drawer
Heartwarming: This Sick Kid Decided To Use His Last Breaths To Blow Up Gerard Butler’s Air Mattress

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tight aspirations
Jul 13, 2009



I'm not sure I can accept cartoons without a crying statue of liberty.

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