Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

eSportseXpert: Jun 24, 2005; Stupid fucking white man.

Colostomy Bag posted:

I can't be bothered to check...have they actually spent a few hours to fix the tutorial yet?

You know, "Hey, here's our game, spend 10 minutes to get a feel of the game first."

There was a tutorial?

Have some catte:

eSportseXpert fucked around with this message at 18:32 on Apr 16, 2016

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:30

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 09:29

CrazyLoon: Aug 10, 2015; "..."

Moogle posted:

Perhaps if Clinton had literally screwed Lewinski on the newsroom desk during a broadcast, pausing briefly on the way out to wash his balls in the presenter's glass of water, and as he walks away you can see a swastika tattooed on his left buttock. Perhaps that approaches level of public image mishap we're talking here.

I am sooo marking this analogy down, it's the perfect analogy for Ben-ghazi.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:30

The Kins: Oct 2, 2004

Ratmtattat posted:

And here I thought that page 3000 would be the apex of the thread. I can't believe this whole situation continues to top itself.

Hopefully, this thread is the only thing that tops itself.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:30

Io_: Oct 15, 2012; woo woo; Pillbug

The Kins posted:

Hopefully, this thread is the only thing that tops itself.

Remember Citizen, there is always more and it's always worse.

Hail the Stimpire.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:31

JainDoh: Nov 5, 2002; Omar strollin'

p sure after all the poo poo we've said CIG and their supporters will dismiss anything, even this disgusting poo poo

besides they are busy worrying about space grief

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:31

Fat Shat Sings: Jan 24, 2016

SelenicMartian posted:

Tell her your favorite movie is 'Titanic', 16 year old girls love 'Titanic'... #3,193

On the other hand, when I'm 24 I hope to be doing 18 year olds... #9,967

Legions of children worldwide are having sex with 40 year old men. #14,178

So I went to my sisters birthday party last night... I definately need to hang around more nine year olds, since parties with cake and ice cream and pinatas and stuff are way more fun than adult parties. #19,128

A black guy who can't find crack? I think not. I really shouldn't be letting my nine year old cousin watch this. #21,603

No, but If I was going to rape 12 year old girls I'd get a vasectomy... but I'm not so I won't so there. #14,547

.......Is this like OJ's "IF I did it?"

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:32

CrazyLoon: Aug 10, 2015; "..."

Mr.Tophat posted:

That beautiful moment where a parody game becomes the salt to rub into Ben's self-inflicted and unattended wound, it's stunning, I can't stop marveling at it

Come to think of it, a lot of this might not be as bad IF BEN WASN'T SO OBSESSED WITH GOONS AND UTTERLY SOCIALLY INEPT AS TO TWEET THE SITE HIMSELF AND NOT SCRUB IT!

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:32

A Lone Girl Flier: Sep 29, 2009; This post is dedicated to all those who fell by the forums, for nothing is wasted, and every apparent failure is but a challenge to others.

I showed my dog this thread and she wants you to throw the ball for her, Derek.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:32

Einbauschrank: Nov 5, 2009

Serious question: What does "LOAF" stand for, anyway? Is it something like "Lord of all F[emales]?"

Einbauschrank fucked around with this message at 18:45 on Apr 16, 2016

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:32

trucutru: Jul 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Well, hello 3300, I have the feeling we'll see 3333 pretty soon.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:33

JainDoh: Nov 5, 2002; Omar strollin'

Waldo P Barnstormer posted:

I showed my dog this thread and she wants you to throw the ball for her, Derek.

I got yer lawsuit! Yes I do!! Am I gonna throw it? Am I?

I will. Just wait two weeks.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:34

JainDoh: Nov 5, 2002; Omar strollin'

Einbauschrank posted:

Serious question: What does "LOAF" stand for, anyway? Is it soemthing like "Lord of all F[emales]?"

LOAF rules everything around me

cream, get the cream

no, really, get the cream, not the half n half

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:36

grimcreaper: Jan 7, 2012

Samizdata posted:

Technically, ALL text is dreams are supposed to be garbage. The language centers of your brain don't get involved and the rest of your brain's all "Well, gently caress it, this'll do."

Kinda like CIG...

I can safely say I've seen non gibberish text. A single note on the table 'Beware of the dark. That's where I can get you.'

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:36

Happy Sisyphus: Nov 13, 2013; You take the blue paarp - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red paarp - you stay in pre-alpha, and I show you how deep the sperg wallet goes.

trucutru posted:

Well, hello 3300, I have the feeling we'll see 3333 pretty soon.

that will be the real prize

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:38

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

Wafflz posted:

I am awaiting clearance from a mod on that.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:38

OWLS!: Sep 17, 2009; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Posting on a page

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:38

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

D_Smart posted:

I am awaiting clearance from a mod on that.

Proud of you Derek. Discretion is the better part of valour.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:40

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Edit - double post

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:40

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

Kimsemus posted:

I just did, I went to the website, I looked at pictures.

My god I regret everything and the things I have seen here. It's that feeling when your hands are really dirty and greasy and you need to desperately wash them, except it's my brain.

If Ben still has a job at CIG after this, it should really inform any lingering croberts zealots as to how hosed things really are.

If Sandi and Chris let him stay as "The Director of Online Strategy, Community Engagement (and Spaceships)" they are tacitly endorsing the claims by The Escapist. Sandi's alleged racism will been seen as validated if she doesn't take this seriously.

They are going to have to create distance between themselves and Ben for their own sake. And they will.

Ben needs to resign and write his Mea Culpa. It will still look horrible but this is Crisis Management 101.

Step 1: Containment.

They have no choice -- none. Derek will beat them bloody with this. They should've already removed themselves- Ben and Sandi both- from the spokespeople roles.

Beyond that, the internal Foundry / CIG Culture is rife with doubts, resentments, unspoken furies and griefs. There are people-- lots of them -- who will demand CIG management takes action. This stain can spread from Ben's Journals to CIG's own brand and stain the resumes of anyone working there.

"Out, out drat spot..."

This crisis came out of nowhere and surely now is in the Top 5 list of Unforced Errors-- which is no easy list to crack. But it demands immediate action and will result in it, as surely as the sun rises...

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:40

intardnation: Feb 18, 2016; I'm going to space!

what a lovely day.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:41

JainDoh: Nov 5, 2002; Omar strollin'

Mr.Tophat posted:

Proud of you Derek. Discretion is the better part of valour.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:41

ideate: Aug 20, 2002

Einbauschrank posted:

Serious question: What does "LOAF" stand for, anyway? Is it soemthing like "Lord of all F[emales]?"

god damnit

I am sorry guys

I really am

I googled this for some reason

anyway here it says he's not going to tell you or something and then has links to a couple things

http://www.wcnews.com/loaf/

like this

http://www.wcnews.com/loaf/photos

I am sorry guys

there is always more

and it always gets worse

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:42

XK: Jul 9, 2001; Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

I love this thread and I love you guys.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:42

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

alphabettitouretti posted:

Lol twitter locked my account. Maybe a redditor reported it. Ah well I will deal with it tomorrow.

That was quick. You're talking about the @ShitLesnickSaid Twitter account? If so, did you get an email from Twitter yet? It should show the reason it was locked.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:42

xutech: Mar 4, 2011; EIIST

wow look at the followers for poo poo lesnick said...

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:42

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

I literally hit one at random, and boom. Donuts.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:43

Crazy_BlackParrot: Feb 1, 2016; Christ Roberts is way better than toilet lord...

G0RF posted:

If Sandi and Chris let him stay as "The Director of Online Strategy, Community Engagement (and Spaceships)" they are tacitly endorsing the claims by The Escapist. Sandi's alleged racism will been seen as validated if she doesn't take this seriously.

They are going to have to create distance between themselves and Ben for their own sake. And they will.

Ben needs to resign and write his Mea Culpa. It will still look horrible but this is Crisis Management 101.

Step 1: Containment.

They have no choice -- none. Derek will beat them bloody with this. They should've already removed themselves- Ben and Sandi both- from the spokespeople roles.

Beyond that, the internal Foundry / CIG Culture is rife with doubts, resentments, unspoken furies and griefs. There are people-- lots of them -- who will demand CIG management takes action. This stain can spread from Ben's Journals to CIG's own brand and stain the resumes of anyone working there.

"Out, out drat spot..."

This crisis came out of nowhere and surely now is in the Top 5 list of Unforced Errors-- which is no easy list to crack. But it demands immediate action and will result in it, as surely as the sun rises...

The only problem with what you said is... you assume CIG acts like real legit business.

I'm afraid nothing will come of this. I hope i'm wrong tho.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:44

Tokyo Sexwale: Jul 30, 2003

G0RF posted:

If Sandi and Chris let him stay as "The Director of Online Strategy, Community Engagement (and Spaceships)" they are tacitly endorsing the claims by The Escapist. Sandi's alleged racism will been seen as validated if she doesn't take this seriously.

They are going to have to create distance between themselves and Ben for their own sake. And they will.

Ben needs to resign and write his Mea Culpa. It will still look horrible but this is Crisis Management 101.

Step 1: Containment.

They have no choice -- none. Derek will beat them bloody with this. They should've already removed themselves- Ben and Sandi both- from the spokespeople roles.

Beyond that, the internal Foundry / CIG Culture is rife with doubts, resentments, unspoken furies and griefs. There are people-- lots of them -- who will demand CIG management takes action. This stain can spread from Ben's Journals to CIG's own brand and stain the resumes of anyone working there.

"Out, out drat spot..."

This crisis came out of nowhere and surely now is in the Top 5 list of Unforced Errors-- which is no easy list to crack. But it demands immediate action and will result in it, as surely as the sun rises...

Oh Ben absolutely should step down, that's correct. The reason I think he probably won't is in your post - Ben and Sandi should have removed themselves from public roles already, yet they haven't. It's entirely possible I've misread the entire situation, of course, and nothing would please me more than for this broken loon to lose his dream job, I'm just not sure I see it happening.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:44

JainDoh: Nov 5, 2002; Omar strollin'

ideate posted:

I am sorry guys

http://www.wcnews.com/loaf/photos

lisaprom dot jaypeg

pls be a relative (or not? idk)

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:44

SelenicMartian: Sep 14, 2013; Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

It's a script... it's stuff I've said. #15315

Yeah, the problem is that there's probably all this embarassing stuff I've said when I didn't like you people. #15316

Most of them aren't funny:~( #15317

There was one hall with photocopies of the bios for all the Prophecy actors, as well as all the magazine articles about Prophecy... #6746

there was a board of embarassing pictures of Origin employees too. #6747

It was sort of embarassing at the store... It was where I reserved Wc stuff... and she'd find all these pokemon there and go "You caught that one! It's a Diglett!" ad nauseum... I mean, she totally screwed it up, it was Dugtrio... #11340

My theory is that crap tastes good. #15325

I mean, I'm not about to TEST this theory, but doesn't the body take everythign *EXCEPT* the delicious parts out? #15326

But what if poo poo tastes good. Then tasting like poo poo would be a good thing. #15327

As in "Wow, mom, this dinner really tastes like poo poo!" #15328

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:45

i am harry: Oct 14, 2003

Jon Do posted:

To be fair, a lot of those quotes seem like they're probably much worse out of context.

And at one point, around this point, SA was very much about "be as offensive as possible because INTERNET, its funny! dont have thin skin!" immature poo poo

Otoh, these seem like the jokes of someone I don't want to hang out with. Who is a creep.

I have been on SA since its inception and I have never once copied and pasted anything I've said into a document to preserve later on a separate website that I own.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:45

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

FiestaNinja posted:

There was a tutorial?

Did they eradicate it from the menus? If so...lmao.

I thought it should still be there in the main menu. It was such a janky mess of absolute garbage it refused to run for more than 2 minutes on my machine.

Point is, you have a game that is mapped to 70 keyboard combinations...you'd think they'd have a basic flight school type thing.

At least that's how I see it.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:45

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

ideate posted:

god damnit

I am sorry guys

I really am

I googled this for some reason

anyway here it says he's not going to tell you or something and then has links to a couple things

http://www.wcnews.com/loaf/

like this

http://www.wcnews.com/loaf/photos

I am sorry guys

there is always more

and it always gets worse

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:45

Cao Ni Ma: May 25, 2010

Ben is still going to work because gently caress the goonies, he just probably wont be showing up in videos anymore. He'll just stay in CM, where he can keep growing a community thats just as bad as he is

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:45

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

G0RF posted:

If Sandi and Chris let him stay as "The Director of Online Strategy, Community Engagement (and Spaceships)" they are tacitly endorsing the claims by The Escapist. Sandi's alleged racism will been seen as validated if she doesn't take this seriously.

They are going to have to create distance between themselves and Ben for their own sake. And they will.

Ben needs to resign and write his Mea Culpa. It will still look horrible but this is Crisis Management 101.

Step 1: Containment.

They have no choice -- none. Derek will beat them bloody with this. They should've already removed themselves- Ben and Sandi both- from the spokespeople roles.

Beyond that, the internal Foundry / CIG Culture is rife with doubts, resentments, unspoken furies and griefs. There are people-- lots of them -- who will demand CIG management takes action. This stain can spread from Ben's Journals to CIG's own brand and stain the resumes of anyone working there.

"Out, out drat spot..."

This crisis came out of nowhere and surely now is in the Top 5 list of Unforced Errors-- which is no easy list to crack. But it demands immediate action and will result in it, as surely as the sun rises...

Just wait for Mon. I have something being prepared specially for them.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:46

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

D_Smart posted:

Just wait for Mon. I have something being prepared specially for them.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:46

CHICKEN SHOES: Oct 4, 2002; Slippery Tilde

lmao, he did harry potter cosplay

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:47

SelenicMartian: Sep 14, 2013; Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

If public embarassment was a sport, I'd be number 1... #427

Probably not the best guy to handle your online presence.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:47

Sir Simon Milligan: Mar 27, 2003; Yes, I have walked along the path of evil many times, it's a twisting curving path, that actually leads to a charming block garden, but beyond that evil!

It was sort of embarassing at the store... It was where I reserved Wc stuff... and she'd find all these pokemon there and go "You caught that one! It's a Diglett!" ad nauseum... I mean, she totally screwed it up, it was Dugtrio... #11340

What a dumb bitch, how dare she. You were right to be embarassed.

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:47

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 09:29

Sedisp: Jun 20, 2012

So how old is Ben?

# ? Apr 16, 2016 18:47

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