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Rurutia posted:Also, I just want to say GlyphGryph, I really enjoy your posts in this thread. Your parenting philosophy is really in line with mine and have also given me a lot of insight. I agree! Your posts are very insightful and it's inspiring to see how much you enjoy parenting. Although they do also make me feel inadequate.
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Nov 22, 2016 02:20
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GlyphGryph posted:Speaking of which, when did everyone's kids actually start, you know, directly interacting with other kids in a not-superficial way? The most mine has had is one time I can remember when he thought another kid was chasing him and got excited but then it turned out the other kid wasn't. My 2.5 year old has recently started, but from what I can tell, she's been indoctrinated into it by the older kids in her class (she is in a 2.5 to 5 year old prek). She comes home from school full of stories about playing tag or house with kids. The stories usually include bits about how so and so was mean, or this other kid was crying, or that some kid helped her. It's cute. I don't think she is really initiating it on her own yet, though?
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Nov 22, 2016 05:31
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Sockmuppet posted:Re: smart-kid-chat. I was a VERY bright child. It ended up being a detriment to me, not a benefit, because I breezed through school until university, when I finally encountered things I couldn't instantly do - and I had no idea how to approach them. I had never learned how to work at a problem, and thought that if I didn't understand something right away, it was obviously hopeless, and I gave up at once. I wasted years learning problem-solving-skills I should've learned as a child, and persevering at things I'm not naturally good at is a big problem for me to this day. In a similar boat myself. Became an underachiever in university and have really never managed to become anything better than a just-good-enough-achiever since then. It's been a very common thing in my extended family for generations so we really should be expecting it by now.
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Nov 22, 2016 10:09
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I think people are too hung up on achieving too much these days, it sounds real stressful what you guys are going through. As for interaction, I dunno about our kids, they won't even answer stuff like "what did you have for lunch at daycare today?". They're both 3 now. I dunno if it's the three languages thing causing delays, or just being obstinate, because they are obstinate as all gently caress. They talk, but not like in a conversation way, they will blurt out what they want and other standard phrases, they count and identify letters in words, stuff that seems pretty advanced, but they never answer a question. I think the most complex sentence I've heard was Daniel saying "mommy want to take a bath" and she replying "no, it is you who want to take a bath" and he answer "no mommy, it is you who want to take a bath". But that hasn't been repeated.
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Nov 22, 2016 12:27
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GlyphGryph posted:
My younger kids are 5 and 3 and it's really just been over the last year that the 3 year old has been playing properly with her big brother rather than just playing in the vicinity of him, and playing with other kids at playgroup. I'd say it started about 2 and a half. She's a bit of a later developer with her language but it doesn't hold her back with other kids. I've talked about it before, and it's definitely getting better in that she's talking in sentences now, but just not sentences that anyone not attuned to her can understand. Her older brother was the same and he is absolutely fine now (14 and doing really well at school) so it's frustrating and a bit awkward when people ask her something and she just babbles at them but I'm pretty confident it'll come. Her comprehension is absolutely fine and everything else (potty training etc) has been on track.
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Nov 22, 2016 14:17
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His Divine Shadow posted:I think people are too hung up on achieving too much these days, it sounds real stressful what you guys are going through. I wouldn't worry about it. It's only just the last year that my four year old started answering questions. She just didn't seem to care about what we wanted and preferred to not answer. It's very much like children to just blurt out what they want and not form conversations, maybe because they know that conversations will lead to lots of words they still don't know?
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Nov 22, 2016 23:37
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His Divine Shadow posted:I think people are too hung up on achieving too much these days, it sounds real stressful what you guys are going through. Our son did the same, he also has three languages, but I heard from other parents that their kid would do it too. We noticed it was more related to being faced with a question. I think he felt he was being evaluated and thought there was a right response but didn't know what it was, so he wouldn't answer or say he forgot. We did this thing in which my wife would ask the teacher what they did that day and then tell me about it. Then during dinner we would start talking about it without it being a question and he would chat a lot more that way. Try it out, make it more of a flowing conversation instead of "putting them on a spotlight" for an an answer, worked for us! (not all the time, but way more often that questions did) He started kindergarten in September and about three weeks ago he started telling us a lot more about what goes on at school with quite a bit of detail; so like Kitiara said, it's like a phase they go through.
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Nov 23, 2016 00:28
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Has anyone done Play Therapy with their kid before? My ex and I are splitting custody of our almost 4 year old daughter, and she's really gung ho on the idea. Her issues are that my daughter never talks about me at her place, she's not exactly open with her emotions, seems to act differently at school (being outgoing) than she is at home (somewhat conservative), and doesn't seem to "make friends" at school, even though she's friendly with everyone, and after spending 12 nights straight with me (longest she's ever been away from her mom), is now asking her mom "how long until I see you again?" which she hasn't done in about a year. Oh and she also talks about "tricking" teachers into doing what she wants (obviously not something I want to encourage). Me? I'm not exactly super concerned with any of that because of her age, and because she's her own person. Though the manipulation thing is a little weird I'll admit. She's happy, incredibly smart, and very loving. She's my only kid, and I don't know many other people with kids that age. I guess I'm not sure if she's got real concerns that Play Therapy might address, that I'm just not seeing, or if it's just something that isn't needed. I'm kinda torn because I KINDA agree on some things (not having a ton of friends that she would talk about constantly), but I figured I might try to get a 2nd opinion that's not biased.
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Nov 28, 2016 02:05
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Talk to me about baby gates. Our son is almost 10 months and crawling quickly, pulling up, and starting to cruise. We keep a close eye on him but it's probably time for some gates, at least for the stairs. How much of a no-no is it to have tension mounted gates at the top of the stairs? Can babies actually knock those down? What about retractable gates, do they work? Would love any advice and lessons learned in general.
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Nov 28, 2016 02:12
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Speaking of gates, any advice for a non-permanent gate that can cover the bottom of a set of stairs where one side is a wall and the other side is a banister, like this? We got one at Wal-Mart, but it didn't work well.
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Nov 28, 2016 02:28
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Hi_Bears posted:Talk to me about baby gates. Our son is almost 10 months and crawling quickly, pulling up, and starting to cruise. We keep a close eye on him but it's probably time for some gates, at least for the stairs. How much of a no-no is it to have tension mounted gates at the top of the stairs? Can babies actually knock those down? What about retractable gates, do they work? Would love any advice and lessons learned in general. When he was crawling, he mostly ignored the stairs so we were lulled into a sense of false security. Now that he's been walking for two months, it's an enticing target. This past week we had two incidents of forgetting to put the bottom gate up, turned our heads for two seconds, and he was halfway up. I allow him to climb up the stairs under supervision. My wife got really upset about that and blamed his interest in them on that. I won't deny it, but it's not like he wouldn't be interested in them at some point. Thank goodness a co-worker with a couple of kids confirmed this and this past weekend she spent a session showing him how to descend.
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Nov 28, 2016 02:45
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hooah posted:Speaking of gates, any advice for a non-permanent gate that can cover the bottom of a set of stairs where one side is a wall and the other side is a banister, like this? I've seen these banister adapters https://www.amazon.com/EZ-Fit-Baby-Gate-Adapter-Kit/dp/B0124LVKYW/ and I think some gates allow for both tension install or hardware, so you could do tension on the wall side and nail the other side into the banister adapter?
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Nov 28, 2016 03:13
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Can someone suggest a way to stop an almost-2 year old from screaming that they do not think is a funny continuation of the screaming game? Also I actually got to see him play directly with his cousin over thanksgiving, so that was cool since I literally asked that question about it the day before. They mostly ran around trying to give each other things and feed each other and play peekaboo. Then they started giving each other high fives and ended with kisses, first for each other and then going around the room giving one to everybody else. It was pretty cute. He's getting smarter though. Trying to put him down for bed has quickly become him cycling through a list of excuses as to why he can't go to bed now - he wants another story first! No story? Uh... he wants some milk? Oh, I have some milk right there in the room ready to hand him... Actually he pooped! (he didn't poop). Also he's hungry. He won't take any offered food, of course. Oh, also, before I go - did I know there are MOONS and STARS on the side of his crib? It's desperately important that I acknowledge that. And say goodnight to the camera. And, uh... just... let him sleep on the mattress outside the crib. The one near the door. If I let him, he will even make loud fake sleeping sounds... for all of 5 seconds before booking it for the door and trying to escape the room. I assume the excuses and escape attempts will only multiply as he gets older. He can definitely climb out of the crib, so I'm actually kind of amazed he hasn't done it yet.
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Nov 28, 2016 05:19
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hooah posted:Speaking of gates, any advice for a non-permanent gate that can cover the bottom of a set of stairs where one side is a wall and the other side is a banister, like this? We found a tension one that had spacing so it could be secured on the flat parts of the banister. I think it was this one: Munchkin Easy-Close Extra Tall and Wide Metal Gate, Dark Grey https://www.amazon.com/dp/B004CLBX2M/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_qo7oybW7HW7PG
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Nov 28, 2016 05:33
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Hi_Bears posted:Talk to me about baby gates. Our son is almost 10 months and crawling quickly, pulling up, and starting to cruise. We keep a close eye on him but it's probably time for some gates, at least for the stairs. How much of a no-no is it to have tension mounted gates at the top of the stairs? Can babies actually knock those down? What about retractable gates, do they work? Would love any advice and lessons learned in general. I would be pretty nervous about a tension gate at the top of the stairs. My daughter will push her full weight against ours and climb on it if she's out of sight for like two seconds. We have a screw in gate because yikes. I used to use a tension gate to lock my 6 pound dog out of the kitchen, and she would knock that thing over all the time no matter how tight I installed it. I do not have much faith in them.
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Nov 28, 2016 07:42
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I like the wooden ones, if we had stairs in our house (we don't, we're goons) I'd make something like this: https://woodgears.ca/home/baby_gate.html You could probably buy it too... I mean if you're into that kinda stuff.
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Nov 28, 2016 08:53
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momtartin posted:Tricking teachers/manipulation I can't say anything about play therapy because I don't know anything about it, but going by all the almost-4-year-olds I know/have known, "manipulation" is extremely normal for that age. In my experience that is when I start hearing a whole lot of "mom told me I'm allowed to punch the book if it's boring" or "it's okay because the cat said he wanted me to throw him". I'm not an expert by any means but it doesn't seem unhealthy to me, it's just experimenting. I feel like it's almost more about the concept of things happening "off-camera" - like they haven't figured out yet that it matters whether mom ACTUALLY told you a thing or not, and the phrase isn't just a magic spell that lets you do things you want to do. The parents' job is to help them figure out the difference. You didn't go into detail about what "manipulation" meant so I might be way off base I guess 
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Nov 28, 2016 09:20
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GlyphGryph posted:Speaking of which, when did everyone's kids actually start, you know, directly interacting with other kids in a not-superficial way? The most mine has had is one time I can remember when he thought another kid was chasing him and got excited but then it turned out the other kid wasn't. I'm starting to overhear some little conversations now though (I'm a teacher at her daycare) which I really enjoy. 4yo kid asks if he can come in the cubby house daughter and her same-age buddy are occupying, she replies "No because you are too big. I am little and (buddy) is little."
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Nov 28, 2016 10:55
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GlyphGryph posted:Can someone suggest a way to stop an almost-2 year old from screaming that they do not think is a funny continuation of the screaming game? You don't. Let them scream it out. At that age your kid is testing boundaries or trying to figure out how to elicit reactions from you. Obviously you don't ignore your kid for everything but since this is annoying, just such it up and ignore it.
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Nov 28, 2016 12:22
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Our 9mo old is interested in the stairs but we have a tension gate at the bottom. He doesn't get to be on the floor upstairs since that's where the litter box is so 1 does just fine. Now, getting him to nap\go to sleep at night, that is a nightmare. 
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Nov 28, 2016 15:07
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hooah posted:Speaking of gates, any advice for a non-permanent gate that can cover the bottom of a set of stairs ... This one has worked out pretty well for us: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001OC5UMQ/ Similar to others posted, I think. The only problem in our situation is that there's a wider gap between the last two banister spindles so now my son can ninja up through that space (after watching the cats do it). Still, it's effective most of the time. I haven't figured out what to do at the top of the stairs. There's a railing and an odd angle on one side that makes things difficult. I definitely wouldn't put this kind of tension gate up at the top.
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Nov 28, 2016 15:41
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namaste faggots posted:You don't. Let them scream it out. At that age your kid is testing boundaries or trying to figure out how to elicit reactions from you. Obviously you don't ignore your kid for everything but since this is annoying, just such it up and ignore it. Ugh, I was afraid this was the response I was going to get, but I guess it is what it is.
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Nov 28, 2016 15:56
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Hoping somebody can help me with one of my twin boys. He's 7 weeks and is a total loving spazz right now. He wants to be held CONSTANTLY and freaks out if he's not being held. We're talking 90% of the day here. It feels like a regression - he's definitely gotten worse over the last week or so. He seems to despise being swaddled - he screams nonstop and fights and fights until he gets his arms free. But when his arms are free, his flailing arms stress him out and he freaks out! We've tried swaddling blankets and the swaddleme straight jackets and he hates them all. Feels like such a catch-22. We're trying to be better at not putting him down into a different location when he's asleep since we've read that waking up in a different location is stressful to them. With two babies, we really can't be holding him all day long and we don't have the room or the desire to let him sleep in bed with us. The 5s' work temporarily but the minute he's down, he freaks out again. His brother loves being swaddled, and will happily sleep in a crib/rock and play/wherever. I get that they're different and that this behavior is probably 'normal' but we really need to get some incremental improvements or we're gonna lose it. A lot of stuff that i could see putting up with if you've got one baby is a lot worse when you're also taking care of another dude.
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Nov 28, 2016 16:05
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quote:Hoping somebody can help me with one of my twin boys. He's 7 weeks and is a total loving spazz right now. He wants to be held CONSTANTLY and freaks out if he's not being held. We're talking 90% of the day here. It feels like a regression - he's definitely gotten worse over the last week or so. This is normal and temporary, it could be a growth spurt/developmental leap. Try a baby carrier, just don't let him sleep in it and follow TICKS, positional asphyxia happens. E-Money posted:He seems to despise being swaddled - he screams nonstop and fights and fights until he gets his arms free. But when his arms are free, his flailing arms stress him out and he freaks out! We've tried swaddling blankets and the swaddleme straight jackets and he hates them all. Feels like such a catch-22. Try a transitional (Zippa dee Zip: https://www.sleepingbaby.com/). It's no longer recommended to swaddle the arms past 8 weeks, and since you're almost there, might as well try it now. The Merlin Sleep Suit is magic if he's over 12 lbs. quote:We're trying to be better at not putting him down into a different location when he's asleep since we've read that waking up in a different location is stressful to them. With two babies, we really can't be holding him all day long and we don't have the room or the desire to let him sleep in bed with us. The 5s' work temporarily but the minute he's down, he freaks out again. It's good to have good sleep habits. Look into preciouslittlesleep.com, Weissbluth's book: https://smile.amazon.com/Healthy-Sl...ts+happy+child, and Baby Whisperer book: https://smile.amazon.com/Baby-Whisperer-Solves-Your-Problems/dp/0743488946/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1480347145&sr=8-2&keywords=baby+whisperer. Best you can do right now is to set the stage with a dim room and white noise, calm him down, and rock him to sleep, then transition him to a surface when he hits deep sleep (about 15-20min in). Do you have a set routine like EASY? Overall though, he really just needs time. =/ Around 4 months, his sleep will change and you will be able to use PU/PD techniques (http://www.mybabysleepguide.com/2009/01/pupd-tbw.html). At 6 months, he'll definitely be ready for CIO methods like Ferber or Extinction. Hopefully by implementing the methods of the books now rather than later, you won't have to use CIO methods, but you will get incremental improvement over time. Rurutia fucked around with this message at 16:46 on Nov 28, 2016 |
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Nov 28, 2016 16:34
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Also, I hate to bring this up, but could he be hungry? Having enough supply to breastfeed twins is HARD and downright impossible for some people. There is very marginal difference between formula fed and breast fed babies, if that could be the problem. My son was super fussy about sleeping at this stage and we found out at his 2 month appointment that he wasn't getting enough to eat (low weight gain between 1 month and 2 month). He napped like a champ once we started supplementing (with pumped milk).
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Nov 28, 2016 16:47
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Rurutia posted:This is normal and temporary, it could be a growth spurt/developmental leap. Try a baby carrier, just don't let him sleep in it and follow TICKS, positional asphyxia happens. Thanks for the advice and the reminder that it's temporary. I carry him around in our boba 4g as much as my back can stand and am getting a new (hopefully properly sized) baby k'tan, which i hope is easier for me to wear sitting down/working at a computer. I'll look into the transitional swaddle - although i had not heard about not swaddling at 8 weeks? Do you have a source? Finished Dr. Karp's book (happiest baby on the block) and he had mentioned that while a lot of people say that, he thought it was the absolute worst time to stop swaddling arms in. If i remember, his rationale was that swaddled babies (with white noise, and all the other good stuff) fuss less and are less likely to flip over. We are definitely not trying to rush to do CIO or anything. More concerned about creating bad sleep hygiene for them in the meantime. Will check out your suggested sources as well!
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Nov 28, 2016 16:49
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The Lillebaby is what we use and it has back support which really helps. We have it purely because of that. The swaddling thing is a safety issue: https://www.aappublications.org/content/34/6/34 https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/baby/diapers-clothing/Pages/Swaddling-Is-it-Safe.aspx I take safety advice from the AAP over individual doctors. Above sources are both AAP, and the evidence is from a systematic review that was published this year.
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Nov 28, 2016 16:54
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E-Money posted:Hoping somebody can help me with one of my twin boys. He's 7 weeks and is a total loving spazz right now. He wants to be held CONSTANTLY and freaks out if he's not being held. We're talking 90% of the day here. It feels like a regression - he's definitely gotten worse over the last week or so. HAHA we have the same baby! My little one turned 8 weeks on Friday and let me tell you the last week was a wonder to behold. It is our first so we obviously have the ability to give undivided attention, but he would simply refuse to be happy if he wasn't being held. Oddly enough over the weekend it just cleared up and he is back to sleeping normally. My sister who has a 15 month old told me something about "Wonder Weeks" which I guess are mental growth spurts, and they can definitely cause these kinds of reactions. We also had some luck just swaddling below the arms to help keep his legs more secure. The few times I was able to get him to fall asleep in the bassinet was by holding his arms tight to his sides until he finally passed out 10 minutes later (my back is still killing me from this!) Anywho it seems temporary so keep the faith!
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Nov 28, 2016 16:55
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Rurutia posted:Also, I hate to bring this up, but could he be hungry? Having enough supply to breastfeed twins is HARD and downright impossible for some people. There is very marginal difference between formula fed and breast fed babies, if that could be the problem. My son was super fussy about sleeping at this stage and we found out at his 2 month appointment that he wasn't getting enough to eat (low weight gain between 1 month and 2 month). He napped like a champ once we started supplementing (with pumped milk). No offense taken! We are supplementing + feeding expressed breast milk. We have real reasonable expectations. His weight gain has been on point although he's due for another weight check next friday and hasn't been weighed since his 1mo appointment. The behavior appears to be unrelated to hunger. He freaks out after chugging down 3.5 oz of expressed breast milk or formula. He does tend to spit up a bit more than his brother but i think it's well within normal limits. We do lots of burping and upright time after feeds as well. He was just going ballistic after finishing a feed and literally the only thing that chilled him out was tossing him in the carrier. Even holding him up against my chest in that position doesn't seem to work as well as the carrier. Luckily, i'm working from home today so can help with this stuff but my wife is still recovering from her c-section, has to pump every couple of hours, and has to take care of another baby. Carrying one around all the time is just not sustainable all of the time. And that doesn't even get into the guilt that comes with the "easy" baby not getting as much attention because he is content to nap/sit quietly in his rock n play when his brother is freaking out.
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Nov 28, 2016 16:58
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E-Money posted:No offense taken! We are supplementing + feeding expressed breast milk. We have real reasonable expectations. His weight gain has been on point although he's due for another weight check next friday and hasn't been weighed since his 1mo appointment. The behavior appears to be unrelated to hunger. He freaks out after chugging down 3.5 oz of expressed breast milk or formula. He does tend to spit up a bit more than his brother but i think it's well within normal limits. We do lots of burping and upright time after feeds as well. It sounds like it could be reflux. My son's like that too, you have to hold him in the perfect position while bouncing on a yoga ball when he has a bad episode. This is, again, something that peaks around 3-4 months then mostly goes away by 6 months. I know that doesn't help you. My ped says that they don't usually prescribe meds for it unless the baby is throwing up too much and not gaining weight. It's just hard. As for your wife dealing with this. Oh man. I just got off of having to pump every 2 hours cause of the supplementation and let me tell you. It sucks. Hard core. It also made the breastfeeding relationship worse for me. I don't know if I could've done it if I had a c-section AND with another baby to take care of. I don't want to push formula, but I do want to say that she might deep down want the load off that formula would bring but feel the guilt of not wanting to use it. If you haven't, try just telling her, "Your well being is most important. You being good, means that you can better take care of the babies. If you think formula would help, then I will support you 100%. If you want to push through this, just tell me what I can do to make it easier for you." Finally, about the 'easy baby' neglect. It's not neglect. Babies do not need a lot of stimulation, they need their alone time for good development. Usually nowadays, the problem is overstimulation because we think we're neglecting our babies. If he needs you, he'll let you know. 
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Nov 28, 2016 17:07
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Rurutia posted:Finally, about the 'easy baby' neglect. It's not neglect. Babies do not need a lot of stimulation, they need their alone time for good development. Usually nowadays, the problem is overstimulation because we think we're neglecting our babies. If he needs you, he'll let you know. Being a first timer at 8 weeks I have not heard this comment before and now I'm worried that I'm probably overstimulating, since whenever my little guy is awake I'm trying to interact with him. Do you have any sources about this that I could read up on?
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Nov 28, 2016 17:14
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Rurutia posted:It sounds like it could be reflux. My son's like that too, you have to hold him in the perfect position while bouncing on a yoga ball when he has a bad episode. This is, again, something that peaks around 3-4 months then mostly goes away by 6 months. I know that doesn't help you. My ped says that they don't usually prescribe meds for it unless the baby is throwing up too much and not gaining weight. It's just hard. Hahahahahahaha. No loving way. I have gently suggested that formula only would be fine, that she wouldn't be a bad mom, etc, that the babies are great, that it would free up more energy for her and she is having none of it. We talked about this before delivery and we were on the same page about it, but post delivery she realized that all that talk about being okay with not breastfeeding/pumping was bullshit and that it's actually super important to her. I definitely have days where I wish she would ease up on it (especially since they aren't usually getting a full feed from a nurse, so we need to follow up with a bottle, and the other 'good' baby has a tongue tie that we may need to resolve) but she wants to power through this and make it happen, so i've got to support her on this. I totally think it could be reflux too, but he does freak out pretty much irregardless of his feeding schedule so i don't think it's 100% the cause either. Also - i looked up that zipadee zip, and they're sized for starting at 3 months/12 lbs? Our boys are on the lighter side so don't think we'll be ready for that for a bit. Any other suggested transition stuff if we're supposed to stop swaddling with arms in this week? Definitely not gonna go cold turkey until they get old enough for another solution.
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Nov 28, 2016 17:14
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E-Money posted:Hahahahahahaha. No loving way. I have gently suggested that formula only would be fine, that she wouldn't be a bad mom, etc, that the babies are great, that it would free up more energy for her and she is having none of it. We talked about this before delivery and we were on the same page about it, but post delivery she realized that all that talk about being okay with not breastfeeding/pumping was bullshit and that it's actually super important to her. I definitely have days where I wish she would ease up on it (especially since they aren't usually getting a full feed from a nurse, so we need to follow up with a bottle, and the other 'good' baby has a tongue tie that we may need to resolve) but she wants to power through this and make it happen, so i've got to support her on this. I totally get where she's coming from (and where you're at). We have a box of formula in the pantry sitting unopened. I was working from home while pumping/feeding every 2 hours (that's 8 hours to feed him a day) and I still didn't use it. For people reading the thread, here's a really good sibling study that debunks a lot old views of formula vs bm: http://researchnews.osu.edu/archive/sibbreast.htm http://www.halosleep.com/safe-swaddling-made-easy-1/ Halo sleep sack with arms out is the only other option I know of. =/ I understand, my son was small too. He screamed in or out of the swaddle so we just went cold turkey til he fit in his Merlin. Rurutia fucked around with this message at 17:19 on Nov 28, 2016 |
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Nov 28, 2016 17:17
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Good god gently caress the breastfeeding only zealots.
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Nov 28, 2016 17:29
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SpaceCadetBob posted:Being a first timer at 8 weeks I have not heard this comment before and now I'm worried that I'm probably overstimulating, since whenever my little guy is awake I'm trying to interact with him. Do you have any sources about this that I could read up on? This is totally fine if he's not showing signs of overstimulation and you're not stimulating him so much he's not getting his naps in (https://sleepybud.com/baby-sleep-chart/). For newborns, everything is new and interesting, and a chance to learn. Even just your ceiling. Parent/child interactions are important for bonding, but even attachment parenting says that you need to meet your baby's needs 30% of the time for bonding to occur. My post was just saying that leaving one twin alone for to take care of the other twin is not going to impinge on that. Sorry I don't have a specific source. =/
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Nov 28, 2016 17:33
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namaste faggots posted:Good god gently caress the breastfeeding only zealots. What? Hoping that's in reference to the studies posted and not my situation, since we are happily supplementing formula? Breastfeeding just ended up being important to my wife and she wanted to have the bonding experience of breastfeeding? Also, formula is expensive with two babies so unless you want to cut me a check or ship us a crate, it helps to cut down on costs? Like, I agree with you, just sort of came from nowhere given the current discussion in the thread.
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Nov 28, 2016 17:39
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momtartin posted:my daughter never talks about me at her place, she's not exactly open with her emotions, seems to act differently at school (being outgoing) than she is at home (somewhat conservative), and doesn't seem to "make friends" at school, even though she's friendly with everyone, and after spending 12 nights straight with me (longest she's ever been away from her mom), is now asking her mom "how long until I see you again?" which she hasn't done in about a year. Oh and she also talks about "tricking" teachers into doing what she wants Yeah, your almost 4 year old sounds like a completely normal almost 4 year old. With that said, you should definitely adress your ex's concerns properly, not just brush them off if you don't agree with them, in the interest of promoting good co-parenting. I totally get being extra sensitive about any possible problems when you're trying to navigate parenting after splitting with your partner. I haven't the faintest idea what play therapy is, but it sounds pretty low-key. Though none of the things you listed above sound at all concerning, being proactive about helping your daughter deal with the situation can't hurt, since having parents who aren't together can certainly be pretty upsetting for a small kid at times.
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Nov 28, 2016 19:49
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E-Money posted:Hoping somebody can help me with one of my twin boys. He's 7 weeks and is a total loving spazz right now. He wants to be held CONSTANTLY and freaks out if he's not being held. We're talking 90% of the day here. It feels like a regression - he's definitely gotten worse over the last week or so. I only have one baby but babywearing was crucial for the first 3-4 months - it was the only way he would sleep during the day. We started with a Solly baby wrap (similar to a moby but thinner and not as hot), then moved on to a ring sling when he got bigger. They're a lot more comfortable to wear around the house than buckle carriers since there's nothing digging into your waist when you sit. You can even tandem wear two ring slings. I tried a K'tan but I think I'm between sizes so it was never comfortable. The Solly and ring sling are one size fits all. Rurutia posted:This is normal and temporary, it could be a growth spurt/developmental leap. Try a baby carrier, just don't let him sleep in it and follow TICKS, positional asphyxia happens. Why do you recommend babies not sleep in a baby carrier? As long as their airways are clear and you are wearing correctly, it's a favorite sleeping spot for a lot of babies. People even talk about the "sleepy dust" that carriers have because of how good they are at lulling babies to sleep.
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Nov 28, 2016 20:30
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It carries increased risk of SIDS. Currently, the hypothesized mechanism for SIDs doesn't require compromised airway (asphyxiation) but just lowered oxygen saturation. Akin to them sleeping on their bellies. If you choose to do it knowing the risks, that's fine. My baby certainly fell asleep in my ring sling especially in the early ages, and I didn't transition him a few times when I was really desperate. But I'm not going to recommend it, especially for routine sleep. Here's also a recent study about SUIDs in baby carriers (so not SIDs): http://rd.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00431-015-2593-6?no-access=true Rurutia fucked around with this message at 20:54 on Nov 28, 2016 |
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Nov 28, 2016 20:47
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I'm looking for some advice with our almost-4 year old daughter. She is the middle child (so far), has some delayed speech issues (nothing crazy, we had her assessed and she is doing "fine" but she's hard to understand) and is a serious goofball. She is very imaginative, plays very well by herself with toys as well as playing with others, sleeps well (no naps), is in generally great physical shape and is a happy little girl. She potty-trained like a champ! We started her in preschool a few months ago, both to help her with her speech and to get her used to the rules of a classroom. I am a stay-at-home parent of 3, so we don't really need to do daycare but it also means my kids haven't been exposed to the routine of a classroom setting or teachers or anything. I figured since she was potty-trained and needed the speech help, we'd put her in a private preschool this year then Transitional Kindergarten (TK) next fall at the public school. But she isn't really adjusting well to the classroom setting and continues to be the same goofball during classtime as any other time. There are a handful of kids in her class that are all apparently the same way - they tend to egg each other on and while they are all really good friends, it is disruptive to the class and her poor teacher is overwhelmed. She can't sit still, she likes to pretend to be an animal and barks/meows/etc during class, it's hard for her to listen and take directions because she"just wants to play!" Considering she will be going to TK next year, should I consider pulling her out of preschool for the next few months and just let her be a kid? She turns 4 on 12/31, and while I love the idea of her somehow maturing overnight it just feels like she's not ready for the structure of a classroom. Should I keep her in and hope it all clicks into place over time, or should we take a break for a few months to let her just be a little kid? I'm sure the class situation doesn't help, with other little kids being just as disruptive as she is. Should I consider a different preschool? I don't even know if that's an option, preschools around here tend to have waiting lists, but its worth a shot I guess! Thanks in advance for any advice you can give me!
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Nov 28, 2016 21:07
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