UKMT April 2017 - Circular Corbyn Conversation Parlour

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT April 2017 - Circular Corbyn Conversation Parlour

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forkboy84: Jun 13, 2012; Corgis love bread. And Puro

kustomkarkommando posted:

Brokenshire gave an extended deadline to early may for the NI talks.

Could be pulling that away of course as the 18th was the second deadline

So either she's breaking her promise on the NI extension or she's breaking her promise on a snap election. And people still trust the Tories. Extended fart noises.

Can't see it being the Queen dead, there was that Guardian article lately showing the plans for what would happen when she dies, and one involved cutting into all the radio stations with the news, and I've had BBC 6 Music on all morning.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:37

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# ? May 17, 2024 17:10

Darth Walrus: Feb 13, 2012

ukle posted:

Just searching around online and I think someone on Reddit has worked it out what it is -

The Northern Ireland deal ended yesterday (all be it with Talks still on going), so she is going to announce return of direct rule of Northern Ireland. Would expect an announcement today and it would be done by her, so it does add up.

Well, poo poo. That'd certainly be something. Pretty disastrous timing for her, though, even if she doesn't have a choice in the matter.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:37

ukle: Nov 28, 2005

Ewan posted:

- Snap election. Seems realistic, and a good time for the Tories to do it. But Theresa May has a very strong and long-held reputation for holding a view and sticking with it, and has for a long time been ruling out an early election. It'd have to get through Parliament, but can't see it being blocked.

It would be impossible to pass if Labour has any sense as they would lose 100+ MP's and they would be 'Turkey's voting for Christmas'. Remember the only way to call a GE quickly is via the options in respective bill and that requires a 2/3rd majority of MP's. The other way of repealing the bill would take time and would probably be blocked in the Lords.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:38

MikeCrotch: Nov 5, 2011; I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

Ewan posted:

So options are:

- Snap election. Seems realistic, and a good time for the Tories to do it. But Theresa May has a very strong and long-held reputation for holding a view and sticking with it, and has for a long time been ruling out an early election. It'd have to get through Parliament, but can't see it being blocked.

Seems like a weird choice considering the leaked Tory memo about how they would almost certainly lose any potential gains to the Lib Dems. But then again, we live in *interesting times*

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:39

Ewan: Sep 29, 2008; Ewan is tired of his reputation as a serious Simon. I'm more of a jokester than you people think. My real name isn't even Ewan, that was a joke it's actually MARTIN! LOL fooled you again, it really is Ewan! Look at that monkey with a big nose, Ewan is so random! XD

Corbyn apparently said before if a snap election got called he'd vote for it

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:40

Pissflaps: Oct 20, 2002; by VideoGames

ukle posted:

It would be impossible to pass if Labour has any sense as they would lose 100+ MP's and they would be 'Turkey's voting for Christmas'. Remember the only way to call a GE quickly is via the options in respective bill and that requires a 2/3rd majority of MP's. The other way of repealing the bill would take time and would probably be blocked in the Lords.

There's no way the opposite could vote *for* the government in a no confidence motion.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:40

Kurtofan: Feb 16, 2011; hon hon hon

Guavanaut posted:

Jeremy = 6
Bernad = 6
Corbyn = 6

bernie???

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:41

kustomkarkommando: Oct 22, 2012

forkboy84 posted:

So either she's breaking her promise on the NI extension or she's breaking her promise on a snap election. And people still trust the Tories. Extended fart noises.

Can't see it being the Queen dead, there was that Guardian article lately showing the plans for what would happen when she dies, and one involved cutting into all the radio stations with the news, and I've had BBC 6 Music on all morning.

Eh the early may thing wasn't a promise more so than a vague statement.

I could see a "after the failure of movement on talks, and following consultation over Easter I've decided to introduce emergency legislation" as a line

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:41

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

My guess is a referendum on giving her presidential powers, allowing her to remain in power until 2029. Running on the recent landslide elections, usually near enough 50/50, she'll win and finally build the Grand Temple atop the O2

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:42

MikeCrotch: Nov 5, 2011; I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

What are the odds on something left field like "Boris has been deemed guilty of treason by the Committee for Public Brexit over his G20 failure and has been summarily executed by Brimstone missile firing squad."

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:43

Kurtofan: Feb 16, 2011; hon hon hon

hope is a lie

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:44

Pissflaps: Oct 20, 2002; by VideoGames

I don't think it's an election.

That Northern Ireland idea looks reasonable which would be boring af.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:45

communism bitch: Apr 24, 2009

Guavanaut posted:

I don't get why libertarians of any stripe would have anything positive to say about a PM who is most famous for state aggression and pushing forward vast quantities of laws and prohibitions.

I guess Ron Paul libertarians might like him because he hates black people.

Deregulation of the finance industry, the opening up of Iraq to international markets and reconstruction, which generated billions of $ for international capital, and stands to generate billions more going forward. He's the Libertarian Christ figure so long as you remember that even though most libertarians are poor in fact, they're all temporarily embarrassed captains of industry in theory. If only they'd already been billionaires in 1997 they'd probably be trillionaires by 2009 thanks to Saint Tone (pbuh).

Even the prohibitions and laws he did implement were mainly directed at social control of the poor, which libertarians never identify as, even when they haven't got a pot to piss in.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:45

Bape Culture: Sep 13, 2006

It's not war because trump would have tweeted it by now

Maybe satan is finally here and willing to show himself

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:46

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Maybe the Queen is abdicating to Charles who will style himself as Lord Protractor.

Kurtofan posted:

bernie???

That would avoid the deliberate misspelling.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:46

ukle: Nov 28, 2005

Pissflaps posted:

I don't think it's an election.

That Northern Ireland idea looks reasonable which would be boring af.

GE's being called usually leak well before hand as well; so given the way everything leaks now it would be very surprising.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:46

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Pissflaps posted:

I don't think it's an election.

That Northern Ireland idea looks reasonable which would be boring af.

maybe dan hodges will be right for once and she's resigning on health grounds

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:47

TheRat: Aug 30, 2006

ukle posted:

It would be impossible to pass if Labour has any sense as they would lose 100+ MP's and they would be 'Turkey's voting for Christmas'. Remember the only way to call a GE quickly is via the options in respective bill and that requires a 2/3rd majority of MP's. The other way of repealing the bill would take time and would probably be blocked in the Lords.

We've been over this many times. Opposition voting against an election, denying themselves and their voters a chance to get into power would be complete political suicide.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:48

MikeCrotch: Nov 5, 2011; I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

Bape Culture posted:

It's not war because trump would have tweeted it by now

Maybe satan is finally here and willing to show himself

Theresa May gonna unzip her human suit and her seven true mouths will sing the song that ends the world

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:48

Ewan: Sep 29, 2008; Ewan is tired of his reputation as a serious Simon. I'm more of a jokester than you people think. My real name isn't even Ewan, that was a joke it's actually MARTIN! LOL fooled you again, it really is Ewan! Look at that monkey with a big nose, Ewan is so random! XD

Maybe they've found aliens

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:50

Nude Bog Lurker: Jan 2, 2007; Fun Shoe

Throwing in a 100:1 longshot: the Queen's been declared incapable and Prince Charles has become Regent.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:51

Bape Culture: Sep 13, 2006

Ewan posted:

Maybe they've found aliens

I fuckin hope so. Or an earth shattering asteroid

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:51

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Nah that'd be announced by putting 'go home' billboards into low earth orbit.

Can't be an asteroid either, no way she'd announce a Corbyn policy.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:52

namesake: Jun 19, 2006; "When I was a girl, around 12 or 13, I had a fantasy that I'd grow up to marry Captain Scarlet, but he'd be busy fighting the Mysterons so I'd cuckold him with the sexiest people I could think of - Nigel Mansell, Pat Sharp and Mr. Blobby."

Harry Potter is real and we're going to move to a magic-based economy post-Brexit.

Unfortunately right now the Death Eaters are in charge.

(No change there then)

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:52

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Bape Culture posted:

I fuckin hope so. Or an earth shattering asteroid

this is good for corbyn

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:53

Kurtofan: Feb 16, 2011; hon hon hon

Pissflaps posted:

I don't think it's an election.

That Northern Ireland idea looks reasonable which would be boring af.

Is this an official Pissflaps prediction?

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:53

Pissflaps: Oct 20, 2002; by VideoGames

They're going to make it illegal to go to the shops in you're pyjamas.

Kurtofan posted:

Is this an official Pissflaps prediction?

It is not.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:53

Party Boat: Nov 1, 2007; where did that other dog come from

who is he

ukle posted:

It would be impossible to pass if Labour has any sense as they would lose 100+ MP's and they would be 'Turkey's voting for Christmas'. Remember the only way to call a GE quickly is via the options in respective bill and that requires a 2/3rd majority of MP's. The other way of repealing the bill would take time and would probably be blocked in the Lords.

Legal twitter seems to think that FTPA is a hindrance to snap elections, not a barrier:

https://twitter.com/carlgardner/status/854263452872974336

(Click through for the thread, twitter is bad for this sort of thing)

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:53

Kurtofan: Feb 16, 2011; hon hon hon

Pissflaps posted:

They're going to make it illegal to go to the shops in you're pyjamas.

It depends on the pyjamas imo

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:54

forkboy84: Jun 13, 2012; Corgis love bread. And Puro

Jose posted:

maybe dan hodges will be right for once and she's resigning on health grounds

Assuming that Dan Hodges is right for the first time in decades, leads to the question of who would replace her. Is BoJo the instant favourite? Will Gideon make his play for the top job? Another run at the top job by Andrea Leadsom? Will Jacob Rees-Mogg finally step off the backbenches and into the leadership? Assuming his nanny fancies moving into 10 Downing Street

MikeCrotch posted:

Theresa May gonna unzip her human suit and her seven true mouths will sing the song that ends the world

Finally a Theresa May policy I can get behind.

TheRat posted:

We've been over this many times. Opposition voting against an election, denying themselves and their voters a chance to get into power would be complete political suicide.

As opposed to calling for an election at a point where they are as unpopular as they have been in over 30 years which would almost guarantee political suicide? Hmmm...

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:54

Ewan: Sep 29, 2008; Ewan is tired of his reputation as a serious Simon. I'm more of a jokester than you people think. My real name isn't even Ewan, that was a joke it's actually MARTIN! LOL fooled you again, it really is Ewan! Look at that monkey with a big nose, Ewan is so random! XD

lolol Sky News just read off a message sent to them directly from Fiona Hill. I paraphrase:

"You may want to watch what you say about my boss's health, we are going to be making a formal complaint to the owner of Sky News"

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:55

Pissflaps: Oct 20, 2002; by VideoGames

The ill health thing is interesting she doesn't exactly look well.

https://twitter.com/bbclaurak/status/854272269748772864

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:56

TheRat: Aug 30, 2006

forkboy84 posted:

As opposed to calling for an election at a point where they are as unpopular as they have been in over 30 years which would almost guarantee political suicide? Hmmm...

If you, as an opposition party, are so afraid of an election that you literally vote against it happening you might as well just dissolve the party right now. At that point it's just over. There's no coming back from that lack of confidence and public humiliation.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:58

suck my woke dick: Oct 10, 2012; I CANNOT EJACULATE WITHOUT SEEING NATIVE AMERICANS BRUTALISED!

Put this cum-loving slave on ignore immediately!

Ewan posted:

lolol Sky News just read off a message sent to them directly from Fiona Hill. I paraphrase:

"You may want to watch what you say about my boss's health, we are going to be making a formal complaint to the owner of Sky News"

sky """"news"""

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:57

Pissflaps: Oct 20, 2002; by VideoGames

https://twitter.com/tnewtondunn/status/854271826414981122

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:58

Party Boat: Nov 1, 2007; where did that other dog come from

who is he

forkboy84 posted:

As opposed to calling for an election at a point where they are as unpopular as they have been in over 30 years which would almost guarantee political suicide? Hmmm...

It won't stop anything and will be even worse because the gov can then just self no confidence and call Labour cowards to boot.

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:58

TinTower: Apr 21, 2010; You don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.

Still:

https://twitter.com/markpack/status/854271446339776512

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:59

DesperateDan: Dec 10, 2005; Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

"Good morning ladies and gentlemen. The missiles are flying. Hallelujah, Hallelujah."

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:58

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Pissflaps posted:

https://twitter.com/tnewtondunn/status/854271826414981122

could be ill health then

# ? Apr 18, 2017 10:59

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# ? May 17, 2024 17:10

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Pissflaps is it okay to go to the shops in a pokemon onesie if you're wearing a morning suit underneath?

# ? Apr 18, 2017 11:00

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