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peer
Jan 17, 2004

this is not what I wanted

HEY GUNS posted:

by that point, we were The Wrong Kind Of Christian. exotic but faintly corrupt, etc.

I know that's how the empire was seen by a lot of contemporary western europeans but in the modern day that's never stopped filmmakers from casting the whites, blondest, blue-eyesest of dudes to play all sorts of "exotic" historical figures. Maybe the "wrong" brand of Christianity would have been a bigger deal in 60s US than I assumed

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HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

peer posted:

I know that's how the empire was seen by a lot of contemporary western europeans but in the modern day that's never stopped filmmakers from casting the whites, blondest, blue-eyesest of dudes to play all sorts of "exotic" historical figures. Maybe the "wrong" brand of Christianity would have been a bigger deal in 60s US than I assumed
if you could tell the entire story through the eyes of some white dude viewpoint character who learns to grudgingly respect greeks by the third reel, there we go

edit: like a professor of mine said about Last Samurai, "this is a great samurai movie, what the hell is Tom Cruise doing in it?" Maybe he could teach an olive-skinned chick what love is.

peer
Jan 17, 2004

this is not what I wanted

HEY GUNS posted:

if you could tell the entire story through the eyes of some white dude viewpoint character who learns to grudgingly respect greeks by the third reel, there we go

edit: like a professor of mine said about Last Samurai, "this is a great samurai movie, what the hell is Tom Cruise doing in it?" Maybe he could teach an olive-skinned chick what love is.

What's the name of that Venetian dude who led the defense of the city until he got injured? He's maybe white and dashing enough

edit: Giovanni Giustiniani, and he was (obviously) Genoan rather than Venetian. Render his name as John Justin and there you go

Grumio
Sep 20, 2001

in culina est

HEY GUNS posted:


edit: like a professor of mine said about Last Samurai, "this is a great samurai movie, what the hell is Tom Cruise doing in it?" Maybe he could teach an olive-skinned chick what love is.

Reminds me of the joke about Greeks inventing sex, and then the Romans teaching it to women

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

peer posted:

What's the name of that Venetian dude who led the defense of the city until he got injured? He's maybe white and dashing enough

edit: Giovanni Giustiniani, and he was (obviously) Genoan rather than Venetian. Render his name as John Justin and there you go
a team of ethnic stereotypes led by a white guy, like The Last Valley

Stringent
Dec 22, 2004


image text goes here

Grumio posted:

Reminds me of the joke about Greeks inventing sex, and then the Romans teaching it to women

lol

Phobophilia
Apr 26, 2008

by Hand Knit
there were europeans in the satsuma rebellion... just on the side of the army of mixed peasants and samurai who kicked the rear end of the aristocrats who lost the benefits of the caste system

also they were french, and english speaking films cant have french people be militarily competent

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


Phobophilia posted:

there were europeans in the satsuma rebellion... just on the side of the army of mixed peasants and samurai who kicked the rear end of the aristocrats who lost the benefits of the caste system

also they were french, and english speaking films cant have french people be militarily competent

Yeah the problem wasn't having a white dude in Japan during the war, the problems were it was an American and also the whole "we are traditional, no guns!" stuff which was entirely not true. Japan had guns for centuries by then, everyone used them. The side being portrayed there partly lost because they ran out of bullets.

Mr Enderby
Mar 28, 2015

peer posted:

I know that's how the empire was seen by a lot of contemporary western europeans but in the modern day that's never stopped filmmakers from casting the whites, blondest, blue-eyesest of dudes to play all sorts of "exotic" historical figures.

See John Wayne playing Genghis loving Khan.

Kopijeger
Feb 14, 2010

peer posted:

I googled this, and all I found was a Turkish 1951 production: why have there been so few (if any) epic films about the 1453 capture of Constantinople?

There'a a more recent Turkish version: Fetih 1453.

quote:

There are numerous historical inaccuracies in the film. For instance, its portrayal of the last Byzantine emperor, Constantine XI, as a hedonist (he was mostly celibate). The city at the time was far from its magnificence (which was long gone, as it had been sacked by European crusaders in 1204). The Great Palace was not in use at the time. The film's portrayals of the Byzantines as a wealthy, powerful empire whose rulers lived lives of decadence and luxury at the time of the Conquest may be motivated for dramatic purposes, but they do not reflect the true situation in Constantinople in 1453. The Byzantines are also portrayed by Turkish actors and speak Turkish instead of Greek.

The film only depicts the ethnically Turkish element of the Ottoman army. In reality, the Ottoman army was very diverse, including many Balkan converts to Islam as well as Christian levies and the armies of the Sultan's Christian vassals. Giovanni Giustiniani was wounded by an Ottoman cannon while defending the walls of Constantinople, as opposed to being killed in single combat. Some sources say the wound was caused by a crossbow bolt. He died of the effects o his wound in the early days of June 1453.Constantine XI is given a burial. In fact he had died fighting at the gates and as customary for Ottoman troops, his body was beheaded. Although his body was recovered, his head was not, leading many Byzantines to believe that Constantine XI was alive. Sultan Mehmet entered the city after one day of looting of the army.

quote:

Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdoğan, who watched a special advance screening, liked the film very much. Prior to its release, the film caused outrage in Greece, with many accusing it of being racist and obscuring historical facts, while the Greek Proto Thema newspaper called it "a conquest propaganda by the Turks".

And the trailer (how many glaring inaccuracies can you spot?):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sdtkAM-Ud0

sullat
Jan 9, 2012

HEY GUNS posted:

by that point, we were The Wrong Kind Of Christian. exotic but faintly corrupt, etc. Definitely not blond.

how many movies exist in the west about byzantium at all?

Byzantium/ERE was mostly dustbinned by history in the US. I think it gets mentioned like three times in my history classes. Once for Justinian, once for 1204, and once as an aside for 1453. But mostly because it meant that the spice trade was cutoff after the fall! Well, not cut off, but controlled by Muslims, which is no doubt infinitely worse.

Hieronymous Alloy
Jan 30, 2009


Why! Why!! Why must you refuse to accept that Dr. Hieronymous Alloy's Genetically Enhanced Cream Corn Is Superior to the Leading Brand on the Market!?!




Morbid Hound
There are a number of decent fantasy / historical fiction novels set in byzantium, at least. Guy Gavriel Kay's Sarantine Mosaic series is basically "fantasy Byzantium: the series". The only real "magical" elements are that he renames everything, puts two moons in the sky, and replaces Christianity with sun worship, Islam with lunar worship, and Judaism with star-worship.

feedmegin
Jul 30, 2008


Or if you're Mel Gibson, have them speak in Latin. With modern ecclesiastical pronunciation. When they probably should have been speaking Greek. :negative:

Siivola
Dec 23, 2012

Mika Waltari wrote a novel about the fall of the city. The English translation is titled, embarrassingly, The Dark Angel.

It was the fifties okay?

CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man


I remember learning about Byzantium when I was like 9 and being all blown away that nobody had told me about this other Roman Empire which was comparably large and actually lasted like a thousand years longer than the Rome that everyone thinks is cool. And then I excitedly told some other kids about it and they told me to shut up nerd and they went back to playing with their ninja turtles.

P-Mack
Nov 10, 2007

Hieronymous Alloy posted:

There are a number of decent fantasy / historical fiction novels set in byzantium, at least. Guy Gavriel Kay's Sarantine Mosaic series is basically "fantasy Byzantium: the series". The only real "magical" elements are that he renames everything, puts two moons in the sky, and replaces Christianity with sun worship, Islam with lunar worship, and Judaism with star-worship.

So it's the same world as Lions of Al-Rassan? I'll have to check it out.

Hieronymous Alloy
Jan 30, 2009


Why! Why!! Why must you refuse to accept that Dr. Hieronymous Alloy's Genetically Enhanced Cream Corn Is Superior to the Leading Brand on the Market!?!




Morbid Hound

P-Mack posted:

So it's the same world as Lions of Al-Rassan? I'll have to check it out.

Yup, exactly. Most of his "fantasy historicals" are set at different points in that same universe. Lions of Al-Rassan is by far my favorite but the Sarantine books have a decent amount of appeal just because they can mine all the neat Byzantine history. It's basically Fantasy Justinian / Theodora

Jazerus
May 24, 2011


Grand Fromage posted:

Yeah the problem wasn't having a white dude in Japan during the war, the problems were it was an American and also the whole "we are traditional, no guns!" stuff which was entirely not true. Japan had guns for centuries by then, everyone used them. The side being portrayed there partly lost because they ran out of bullets.

i find The Last Samurai interesting though, because in the wide world of white-guy-goes-native films it's really the only one that fully commits. cruise's character is totally broken at the beginning - american society has used him to commit atrocities and then spat him out. he integrates into the local culture in rural japan not because he is a curious, helpful neighbor, but a captive who cannot help but submit to their culture at first; and then finds he likes it better than what he grew up in. they fix him psychologically, and in the end the former imperialist tool gets riddled with bullet holes for the cause of anti-imperialism. they should have killed him off at that point though.

ken watanabe's character is more the "main character" of the film, too - even though tom cruise is the viewpoint character, he's a sideline, a curiosity, in the overall plot. it's not a perfect film (it would be nice if the rebellion had had guns, yeah, even if they'd gone with "but we're almost out of bullets, so most of us will have to fight traditionally") but it's a lot better than you'd expect from hearing a plot outline

Jazerus fucked around with this message at 17:48 on Mar 1, 2018

OctaviusBeaver
Apr 30, 2009

Say what now?

CommonShore posted:

I remember learning about Byzantium when I was like 9 and being all blown away that nobody had told me about this other Roman Empire which was comparably large and actually lasted like a thousand years longer than the Rome that everyone thinks is cool. And then I excitedly told some other kids about it and they told me to shut up nerd and they went back to playing with their ninja turtles.

I started listening to the History of Byzantium and I have to say I'm disappointed in them so far. They keep bending over and paying tribute to literally anyone who sends a few raiders over the border: the Goths, the Bulgarians, the Huns, the Sasanids. Justinian actually wins a battle against the Persians then manages to screw it up and still gives them thousands of pounds of gold. If you do that you're just telling them you're a giant punching bag full of free money. I want them to grow a spine and go kick some rear end, maybe the upcoming invasion of Italy will give me something.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

OctaviusBeaver posted:

I started listening to the History of Byzantium and I have to say I'm disappointed in them so far. They keep bending over and paying tribute to literally anyone who sends a few raiders over the border: the Goths, the Bulgarians, the Huns, the Sasanids. Justinian actually wins a battle against the Persians then manages to screw it up and still gives them thousands of pounds of gold. If you do that you're just telling them you're a giant punching bag full of free money. I want them to grow a spine and go kick some rear end, maybe the upcoming invasion of Italy will give me something.

The ERE had to deal with basically the entire tide of history wanting them destroyed. It’s an absolute miracle that the ERE didn’t fall in the 600s and they deserve a ton of credit for not only surviving by the skin of their teeth but within few hundred years recovering to become the dominate power in the Mediterranean.

SlothfulCobra
Mar 27, 2011

At the point I'm at in the Roman History Podcast, the pre-split empire has already gotten into the patterns of the legions or praetorians wanting more money and either extorting the imperial government for it, or swapping one emperor for a more "generous" one. It's not much of a jump from that to just paying off the enemy directly, which a few emperors go and do anyways, to the shame of the legions. The legions are the middlemen who did not like getting skipped.

It seems like at some point the military becomes more of a liability than anything else. Half the emperors can't control them, they eat up more money than the empire can afford, and they all lust to go out on campaigns of conquest that the empire as a whole no longer has an interest in.

Thwomp
Apr 10, 2003

BA-DUHHH

Grimey Drawer

OctaviusBeaver posted:

I started listening to the History of Byzantium and I have to say I'm disappointed in them so far. They keep bending over and paying tribute to literally anyone who sends a few raiders over the border: the Goths, the Bulgarians, the Huns, the Sasanids. Justinian actually wins a battle against the Persians then manages to screw it up and still gives them thousands of pounds of gold. If you do that you're just telling them you're a giant punching bag full of free money. I want them to grow a spine and go kick some rear end, maybe the upcoming invasion of Italy will give me something.

You've also got to remember that the empire was still reeling from the after-effects of the Crisis of the Third Century. While still a force in the east, it's power was greatly diminished due to in-fighting and civil war. Invasion from all sides and fewer natural boundaries than Imperium-era Rome had led to a greater need to nip these invader's raids in the bud.

It was only just beginning to turn Rome's way again during the reign of Justinian. Power was being re-established in "lost" provinces throughout the Mediterranean. However, the Persians were making serious inroads in the east (mostly due to Justinian breaking truces/treaties).

The Persian campaign against Rome was only stopped because a massive bubonic plague swept through both empires, stopping the Persian army in its tracks.

If you've lost a significant portion of your population to disease, to the point where you can't really field vast armies anymore (let alone have a workforce to grow crops to feed and clothe them), you'll pay off your enemies to stop the conflict.

feedmegin
Jul 30, 2008

SlothfulCobra posted:

and they all lust to go out on campaigns of conquest that the empire as a whole no longer has an interest in.

Dunno about this bit necessarily. Soldiers generally wanted to stay home and have an easy life, all the glory would go to the Emperor not them.

Ithle01
May 28, 2013

Grand Fromage posted:

Yeah the problem wasn't having a white dude in Japan during the war, the problems were it was an American and also the whole "we are traditional, no guns!" stuff which was entirely not true. Japan had guns for centuries by then, everyone used them. The side being portrayed there partly lost because they ran out of bullets.

I just find it funny that in the movie they go to the United States for soldiers rather than Germany. Then again, at this time the Japanese did hire an American to start an artillery college, but the whole enterprise fell apart when the Japanese discovered that the officer they hired spent all his time evangelizing for his brand of Protestantism rather than teaching the Japanese how to shoot cannons so they kicked him out. The 'no guns' thing was just incredibly stupid though seeing as how that idea died out around 300 years before the film takes place.

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Siivola posted:

Mika Waltari wrote a novel about the fall of the city. The English translation is titled, embarrassingly, The Dark Angel.

It was the fifties okay?
all modern mentions of that phrase are based on a very gay 19th century author. including the wh40k one

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Ithle01 posted:

I just find it funny that in the movie they go to the United States for soldiers rather than Germany. Then again, at this time the Japanese did hire an American to start an artillery college, but the whole enterprise fell apart when the Japanese discovered that the officer they hired spent all his time evangelizing for his brand of Protestantism rather than teaching the Japanese how to shoot cannons so they kicked him out. The 'no guns' thing was just incredibly stupid though seeing as how that idea died out around 300 years before the film takes place.
early modern japanese people loving loved firearms man, and they made some of the prettiest matchlocks in the world

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo

HEY GUNS posted:

all modern mentions of that phrase are based on a very gay 19th century author. including the wh40k one

40k has literal Dark Angels running around and their boss is literally named Lionel Johnson with some space apostrophes. The only better 40k name is the Iron Hands and their fearless leader Ferrus Manus.

Phobophilia
Apr 26, 2008

by Hand Knit
Nobunaga freaking loved tanegashima guns, he’s rad as hell. Post-Sengoku Japan had the highest concentration of firearms at that point in the entire planet.

Then Hideyoshi used those guns and used them to rampage up and down the Korean peninsula, which set in motion the fall of the Ming.

Ithle01
May 28, 2013

HEY GUNS posted:

early modern japanese people loving loved firearms man, and they made some of the prettiest matchlocks in the world

I've only seen them as pictures, but those are some fancy firearms.

Grape
Nov 16, 2017

Happily shilling for China!

peer posted:

I googled this, and all I found was a Turkish 1951 production: why have there been so few (if any) epic films about the 1453 capture of Constantinople? I mean, I can understand why nobody's making that kind of thing today, since white supremacists have thoroughly appropriated any section of history that could even remotely be characterised as "Christians v Muslims", but it seems exactly like the kind of thing Hollywood would have made sixty years ago.

I can very easily imagine the emotional climax: the white, Christian emperor (no doubt played by a Kirk Douglas type), now alone and surrounded, casts off his regalia to reveal the muscles underneath and raises his sword in defiance as the music swells and he's rushed by the faceless mass of brown stereotypes, dying heroically to buy time for His People to flee the city. Seems perfect for audiences of the 50s or 60s who wanted to see some bravery, swordfighting and tragedy and be reassured in the superiority of Dudes Who Look Like Them

Because Western Europe and it's offshoots basically don't know or don't care about anything relating to the Orthodox Christian world.
Rome fell around 500 AD, Greeks haven't done anything interesting since Alexander died, and there are only two types of Christian (Catholic and Protestant).

Mantis42
Jul 26, 2010

The Japanese military that launched the Imjin War was the largest, most well armed gunpowder army on Earth at the time. At least according to Samuel Hawley.

Koramei
Nov 11, 2011

I have three regrets
The first is to be born in Joseon.
China's the big one for this but people always seem to forget that Japan was also more populous than pretty much every contemporaneous European kingdom aside from maybe France. Korea too for that matter. East Asia has a very conducive climate for having lots of dudes and the armies of the region often reflected that.

sullat posted:

Byzantium/ERE was mostly dustbinned by history in the US. I think it gets mentioned like three times in my history classes. Once for Justinian, once for 1204, and once as an aside for 1453. But mostly because it meant that the spice trade was cutoff after the fall! Well, not cut off, but controlled by Muslims, which is no doubt infinitely worse.

I'm not sure it was even mentioned once in my history classes. OTOH Byzantium gets a ton of attention in art history these days.

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

Grape posted:

Because Western Europe and it's offshoots basically don't know or don't care about anything relating to the Orthodox Christian world.
Rome fell around 500 AD, Greeks haven't done anything interesting since Alexander died, and there are only two types of Christian (Catholic and Protestant).

which reminds me, I'd watch a miniseries about the Hussites

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Grumio posted:

Reminds me of the joke about Greeks inventing sex, and then the Romans teaching it to women

It was good of Julius Caesar to reinforce these lessons later for the benefit of the wives of not only his friends, but his most hated enemies too! :)

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


Koramei posted:

China's the big one for this but people always seem to forget that Japan was also more populous than pretty much every contemporaneous European kingdom aside from maybe France. Korea too for that matter. East Asia has a very conducive climate for having lots of dudes and the armies of the region often reflected that.


Until anime.

Get your poo poo together Japan.

Kill All Cops
Apr 11, 2007


Pacheco de Chocobo



Hell Gem

GreyjoyBastard posted:

which reminds me, I'd watch a miniseries about the Hussites

Kingdom Come has sparked an interest from me about this too!

Beamed
Nov 26, 2010

Then you have a responsibility that no man has ever faced. You have your fear which could become reality, and you have Godzilla, which is reality.


sullat posted:

Byzantium/ERE was mostly dustbinned by history in the US. I think it gets mentioned like three times in my history classes. Once for Justinian, once for 1204, and once as an aside for 1453. But mostly because it meant that the spice trade was cutoff after the fall! Well, not cut off, but controlled by Muslims, which is no doubt infinitely worse.

That's because when Hollywood was getting started, the Ottoman Empire was still cool, and strong*, and our friend**.

**no

Siivola
Dec 23, 2012

HEY GUNS posted:

all modern mentions of that phrase are based on a very gay 19th century author. including the wh40k one
A generational gap right here: I'm too young and uncultured to make that connection, it's all teen goths and 40k for me. :negative:

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Siivola posted:

Mika Waltari wrote a novel about the fall of the city. The English translation is titled, embarrassingly, The Dark Angel.

It was the fifties okay?

?????????????????????

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBvdOQ_cy78

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aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009


Siivola posted:

A generational gap right here: I'm too young and uncultured to make that connection, it's all teen goths and 40k for me. :negative:

Warhammer lore is a rich body of art surpassing Shakespeare and Homer in emotional depth and inventiveness and furthermore

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