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My biological father keeps having children he can't be nice to. My real dad is excellent. Funny guy. Raised me right. Never made me sigh.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:09
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 12:34 |
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Prince of Space posted:Did you throw it away once you'd realized your mistake? no. throwing out something you paid money for is a fate worse than bread ownership.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:10
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Vato posted:My biological father keeps having children he can't be nice to. Did he make you sigh in joy?
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Sep 11, 2018 05:10
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JebanyPedal posted:Did he make you sigh in joy? Yes. He's the best. I'm very glad to have him as a dad.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:11
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Pick posted:no. throwing out something you paid money for is a fate worse than bread ownership. Sunk cost fallacy
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Sep 11, 2018 05:12
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farmer crack-rear end's dad tales: - grilling his adolescent son on why the antagonists on children's cartoon "Pokemon" were called "Team Rocket" and then failing to offer any constructive guidance when he found his son's response inadequate - suggesting that a more sensible approach to grilled cheese sandwiches would be to use the microwave - calling me into his room and drunkenly asking me to play on my trombone along with the star wars soundtrack he had playing at full blast on his stereo, then being disappointed when a twelve year old boy with only a couple years experience on the trombone failed to intuit the score on the fly - blasting Genesis so loving loud that it was distractingly loud even with two closed doors between me and the stereo - talking about how one of my cousins was so dumb he would literally never amount to anything (wrong, totally loving wrong, he's not dumb and he's doing just fine) - spending a bunch of time trying to figure out how to rebuild his mom's barn into a house - the cat was absolutely banned from the garage because he might climb up on top of and accidentally collapse the chicken wire-and-plaster "mountain" my dad built on his train set that occupied fully a third of the garage - spending a huge amount of time and money trying to build a scale railroad (complete with scale steam engine) on his mother's property - telling his stupid awkward 14 year old son that it was on him if he wanted to stay in contact with his dad after the divorce - loving up his mom's estate as executor so bad that he almost went to jail - this doesn't really count as a "sigh" but putting his mom in the dingiest loving care home after her stroke and leaving her there until she died a couple months later, despite that this was - as told to her grandson numerous times - literally the absolute worst way she could imagine ending her life and she easily had enough money to have someone care for her in the house she'd lived in for decades until she died - totally ignoring his son at his mother's funeral this is omitting "things my mom told me my dad said that made me sigh", by the way edit: this is more of a both-parents thing but the heavy smoking was pretty big on the sigh-scale. distinctly remember looking down the hall, seeing the living room hazy with cigarette smoke, and deciding to just play in my room instead. also remember numerous car trips where they were both smoking and had the car windows cracked open as if that made it particularly easier to breathe. really, truly happy that my mom quit. Farmer Crack-Ass fucked around with this message at 05:16 on Sep 11, 2018 |
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Sep 11, 2018 05:12
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Vato posted:Yes. He's the best. I'm very glad to have him as a dad. https://youtu.be/EsqX00itW38
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Sep 11, 2018 05:12
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:farmer crack-rear end's dad tales: Your dad isn't so nice, maybe. That blows. But you play trombone?
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Sep 11, 2018 05:15
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I used to, years ago. I'm very self-conscious about anyone hearing me practicing, and I live in an apartment so I know the neighbors downstairs would hear and I don't like the idea of making myself heard to the neighbors anyway.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:17
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I still have the instrument though, and I tell myself someday I'll pick it back up.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:18
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:I still have the instrument though, and I tell myself someday I'll pick it back up. You gotta keep that thing in motion, dude.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:20
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Oh I forgot the hilarious coda: - got busted for DUI - mugshot showed him wearing a Toby Keith t-shirt - then got jailed a second time for contempt of court, "probably for mouthing off to the judge" per my mom lol
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Sep 11, 2018 05:23
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voting for Trump because they thought he would be a good president, as opposed to voting for him as a protest against DNC corruption like I did
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Sep 11, 2018 05:30
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feelix posted:voting for Trump because they thought he would be a good president, as opposed to voting for him as a protest against DNC corruption like I did Pobrecita, Ferlicks.
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Sep 11, 2018 05:51
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dad gay
ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD fucked around with this message at 05:31 on Sep 12, 2018 |
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Sep 11, 2018 06:00
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:this is omitting "things my mom told me my dad said that made me sigh", by the way yeah if we count one parent tattling on the other then "beating 10 month old infant-me so hard you crack one of my ribs" still makes me sigh to this day (but only a shallow sigh, can't get a good deep breath on my right side)
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Sep 11, 2018 06:07
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lol if you posted:yeah if we count one parent tattling on the other then "beating 10 month old infant-me so hard you crack one of my ribs" still makes me sigh to this day (but only a shallow sigh, can't get a good deep breath on my right side) So? That sucks! You can't breathe correctly. Well?
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Sep 11, 2018 06:17
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Vato posted:So? That sucks! You can't breathe correctly. Well? dad beat, now sigh
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Sep 11, 2018 06:37
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lol if you posted:dad beat, now sigh Yo.
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Sep 11, 2018 06:40
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lol if you posted:yeah if we count one parent tattling on the other then "beating 10 month old infant-me so hard you crack one of my ribs" still makes me sigh to this day (but only a shallow sigh, can't get a good deep breath on my right side) Sup fellow beaten goon, my dad's go-to method of discipline when he couldn't figure anything else out was to smack the poo poo out of me.
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Sep 11, 2018 06:43
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drive drunk-- I'm always drunk, and that poo poo is inexcusable
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Sep 11, 2018 07:09
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Threw out my perfectly healthy avocado plant. RIP in Rest India Pale ale
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Sep 11, 2018 07:14
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My family is muslim, my dad drinks. He used to drink with me whenever we are out together but I'm pretty sure my mother knows about it now. When he drinks in front of me he gets weird about it by justifying it and flirts with the bartender. I drink but No one in my family knows, if my dad was less weird about it I would be comfortable drinking with him. Other things: when I was in school my parents would yell at me to study. When I was done with school and looking for work they would yell at me to study. Got a job and they didn't know what to yell at me for then started going after my weight. Now it's get married, even though they cancelled my first wedding. I hope I don't turn our like them.
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Sep 11, 2018 07:15
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I've sighed so much that my parents/wife are now actively agitated at the sound.
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Sep 11, 2018 07:56
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Just a third of the garage huh? I cannot remember a time when my dads chainsmoking rear end wasnt utilizing 90% of my goddamn garage AND most of the backyard with his goony computer setup and 'agriculture' projects that included old egg cartons that were promptly forgotten among tons of other crap. I had to clean all that poo poo up after he finally moved out. Watching some loud rear end episode of FNL on netflix after I worked at in a dishpit for 7 hours and the FLIPPING his poo poo after I ask if that would be the last episode because I have to open at my other job the next day. His unemployed rear end was the worst roommate I have ever had. I was so unnecessarily polite to that loser. Bragging about how his girlfriend before my Mom would let him lick cocaine out of her pussy. Like I wanted to hear that poo poo. Not wanting to pay an electrician to fix the AC in the middle of the summer IN FLORIDA FOR WEEKS Creeping on underage girls at various points of my life. Just putting his hands on me or my brother in general. Smashing my brothers nice die cast metal cars that he bought with his own birthday money at around age 10. Just playing stupid in general when asked various specific questions; "Hey dad is that old broken car from two years ago still in the backyard?" "Which car in the backyard are you referring to?" "Any car. Is there a broken car in your backyard." Just answer the question loser. If your natural instinct that someone is trying to get one over you is triggered by your son then you obviously were not suited to be placed in the role of father and you should not have made that decision for the both of us. But you did and here we are you snake. Bragging about having hosed so many bitches that he might have kids he doesn't even know about. God that last one really tempts me to draw his blood.
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Sep 11, 2018 08:08
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I always let out a hefty sigh whenever my father tried to kill me.
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Sep 11, 2018 08:12
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Filthy Haiku posted:I always let out a hefty sigh whenever my father tried to kill me. Oh come on someone else make the joke
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Sep 11, 2018 08:13
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My dad has this cordless vacuum that he uses like three times a day all over the house, he just does it because he's bored and for some reason enjoys it. Like settle down and chill dad you don't need to vacuum the stairs after dinner.
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Sep 11, 2018 10:22
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If I was the OPs parent id sigh too
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Sep 11, 2018 10:45
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Look, I just really don't care about all this fantasy or sci fi poo poo. It bores me and I'm just not interested in it. So stop telling me about it. Also, these books are terrible and boring. I don't care that you read them. Why would you expect me to show any interest in something you like? Nice Guy Patron fucked around with this message at 10:55 on Sep 11, 2018 |
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Sep 11, 2018 10:52
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my dog died im sad posted:Look, I just really don't care about all this fantasy or sci fi poo poo. It bores me and I'm just not interested in it. So stop telling me about it. All our kids will say this. Except the one too polite to say it and only thinks it. That one will be our favorite.
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Sep 11, 2018 11:06
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My mother is lovely but has some really dumb moments such as : Turning the water heater off so we could enjoy lukewarm or cold baths or just not bathe, with the goal of "saving money" Not putting any money in the electricity meter until it was completely out, meaning the emergency credit was also gone, so essentially paying the increased emergency rate for power at all times. again to "save money" Buying such low quality food that no one wanted to eat it because it "seems to last longer" (she was the only one who would eat it so it lasted however long she wanted it to) Flicking cigarette ash directly onto the floor beside her with no ashtray or bin or recepticle of any kind to even aim at. She got a computer and then found herself addicted to online bingo, ending up going hungry for several days in order to afford her online bingo habits while lying and telling us she was playing the "free version" My father didnt really do a lot to make me sigh, unless you sigh during murderous rage then maybe I'd sigh.
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Sep 11, 2018 11:47
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Dad: Voted in favour of Brexit Is just racist enough to be annoying but not enough to disown Has a loving opinion on everything Hasn’t made a will (at 78) Mom: Treats modern medicine as some kind of scam Loves hippy alternative bullshit therapies So my dad makes me sigh more than my mom.
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Sep 11, 2018 12:15
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Whenever we go to a non-american style restaurant my dad will always start using outdated ethnic slurs, like saying loudly so everyone including the waiter can hear "I never liked this dago/wop/jap/kraut/gook food, why did we come here?" etc. He'll also do the same thing about stereotypically black food like fried chicken but he keeps the n-words a lot quieter and he'll look around to make sure nobody is nearby first.
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Sep 11, 2018 12:21
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Taking people like Bono and Richard Gere and stuff seriously They'll look at the TV and see Angelina Jolie or whoever talking to the UN and like, be inspired
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Sep 11, 2018 12:29
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"what the hell are you saying? what are you actually telling me here? This makes no drat sense, how can this be spicy? Mom it's goat cheese how is this 'too spicy?????'"
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Sep 11, 2018 12:44
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The time they forced me to draw my katana
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Sep 11, 2018 12:46
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SniperWoreConverse posted:"what the hell are you saying? what are you actually telling me here? This makes no drat sense, how can this be spicy? Mom it's goat cheese how is this 'too spicy?????'" I hate people who think things are spicy that are in fact not spicy, including dishes advertised as "spicy" in restaurants
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Sep 11, 2018 12:49
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Mom and dad are long gone but every time I go out for dinner with my aunt and uncle and order anything less than well done, my aunt will suck air in through her teeth and visibly prepare herself for my imminent death. Also trying to set me up with random waitresses for no reason. When I move out I'm just gonna pretend I have a girlfriend so that stops happening
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Sep 11, 2018 13:00
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Colonel Cancer posted:Casual racism mostly
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Sep 11, 2018 13:16
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