Apple Special Event 2018 Live thread:

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > Apple Special Event 2018 Live thread:

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logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

lol 30 min longer

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:17

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 21:10

trilobite terror: Oct 20, 2007; BUT MY LIVELIHOOD DEPENDS ON THE FORUMS!

Craptacular! posted:

My mom has an Apple Watch and it�s such a deeply personal device that it�s hard to justify telling her that I�d like to wipe it for a day and use it to get an idea of the lifestyle improvements in any. She�s too tech-intimidated to use the notifications, widgets, etc; like we literally just learned we can do speakerphone calls on it last month. It�s an expensive heart rate monitor with a clock.

Based on how elderly the features focused are, I�m guessing Apple is also seeing the Watch as a must have niche product for elderly people.

Just get one and if you don�t like it return it. My S3 is totally inessential but I also like it a lot and find myself using it for poo poo all the time.

AlternateAccount posted:

Gaming on phones that isn't bullshit city builder or game-boy grade candy crush type poo poo is such a waste of time.

*development time

It frustrates me to no end that Apple remains obstinate about never pushing for a unified controller standard or ecosystem for that poo poo. Like, I get that in 2010 Jobs didn�t want devs leaning on peripheral accessories because he wanted to normalize multitouch and force devs to make good apps for it �so that you never need to connect anything to your phone/tablet to make it good� but it�s 2018 and people run loving PUBG on their iPhones but Apple insists on games being almost exclusively �touch first�.

The Nintendo Switch has a Tegra from 2015 and a 720p screen but everybody�s falling over themselves to port poo poo like DOOM to it with great results, and that�s on top of Nintendo still having the most busted rear end online service and digital software store in the industry. Meanwhile iOS hardware from like the last 3 years runs performance circles around the Switch and Apple has the App Store/online backup/etc benchmark but that poo poo�s for mobile games and tappity-tap garbage because nobody wants to make a loving controller for it and Apple has no interest in fostering that development when they�re raking in all of those Pok�mon Go bucks.

Like, literally call up 8bitDo and be like �we�ll take care of the certification process but you gotta sell some controllers in our stores� or Microsoft and be like �your console is getting the crap kicked out of it. Make the XBone controller iOS compatible and we�ll stock it� and be done. Both 8bitDo and Microsoft controllers already natively work with Mac OS so the absence on iOS is literally because nobody-most critically Apple- see a point to it. The only controllers Apple sells are those POS Steelseries ones from 2012 that cost like $100. This is why we can�t have Skyrim on iOS.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:17

Happy Noodle Boy: Jul 3, 2002

i can't believe my iphone x has been a piece of poo poo all this time.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:17

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

I love my china phone

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:17

KidDynamite: Feb 11, 2005

logikv9 posted:

lol what the gently caress other phones have done this for years

ah yes thick potato slice or thin potato slice are totally the same

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:17

KidDynamite: Feb 11, 2005

Happy Noodle Boy posted:

i can't believe my iphone x has been a piece of poo poo all this time.

ginormous piece of poo poo

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:18

EL BROMANCE: Jun 10, 2006; COWABUNGA DUDES!
🥷🐢😬

logikv9 posted:

I love my china phone

Asia must be going nuts about the dual SIM.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:18

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

EoRaptor posted:

Nah, just a lightfield sensor somewhere. Lytro has been doing this type of thing for a while.

Ah I remember that thing.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:18

Rick: Feb 23, 2004; When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.

Man I wish I had this all those years I was carrying around two cell phones.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:18

Carlosologist: Oct 13, 2013; Revelry in the Dark

the trap phone and the regular phone are now the same phone

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:19

Binary Badger: Oct 11, 2005; Trolling Link for a decade

EoRaptor posted:

Nah, just a lightfield sensor somewhere. Lytro has been doing this type of thing for a while.

Lytro also is effectively gone, out of business since May of this year, absorbed into Google and no one will continue any Lytro work

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:19

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

*desperately fumbling for fast forward button, I need to go get a burger*

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:19

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

Rick posted:

Man I wish I had this all those years I was carrying around two cell phones.

I'd really like to be able to ditch my work phone and just have one phone but my work phone is managed by IT so I doubt they'd do it.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:19

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

Electric Bugaloo posted:

Just get one and if you don�t like it return it. My S3 is totally inessential but I also like it a lot and find myself using it for poo poo all the time.

It frustrates me to no end that Apple remains obstinate about never pushing for a unified controller standard or ecosystem for that poo poo. Like, I get that in 2010 Jobs didn�t want devs leaning on peripheral accessories because he wanted to normalize multitouch and force devs to make good apps for it �so that you never need to connect anything to your phone/tablet to make it good� but it�s 2018 and people run loving PUBG on their iPhones but Apple insists on games being almost exclusively �touch first�.

The Nintendo Switch has a Tegra from 2015 and a 720p screen but everybody�s falling over themselves to port poo poo like DOOM to it with great results, and that�s on top of Nintendo still having the most busted rear end online service and digital software store in the industry. Meanwhile iOS hardware from like the last 3 years runs performance circles around the Switch and Apple has the App Store/online backup/etc benchmark but that poo poo�s for mobile games and tappity-tap garbage because nobody wants to make a loving controller for it and Apple has no interest in fostering that development when they�re raking in all of those Pok�mon Go bucks.

Like, literally call up 8bitDo and be like �we�ll take care of the certification process but you gotta sell some controllers in our stores� or Microsoft and be like �your console is getting the crap kicked out of it. Make the XBone controller iOS compatible and we�ll stock it� and be done. Both 8bitDo and Microsoft controllers already natively work with Mac OS so the absence on iOS is literally because nobody-most critically Apple- see a point to it. The only controllers Apple sells are those POS Steelseries ones from 2012 that cost like $100. This is why we can�t have Skyrim on iOS.

*gives you a mega swirly*

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:19

Happy Noodle Boy: Jul 3, 2002

I already forgot they still have the piece of poo poo model to announce.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:20

TraderStav: May 19, 2006; It feels like I was standing my entire life and I just sat down

Environmental piece, finally time for a bathroom break.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:20

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

Bring out Lisa

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:20

Rick: Feb 23, 2004; When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.

MarcusSA posted:

I'd really like to be able to ditch my work phone and just have one phone but my work phone is managed by IT so I doubt they'd do it.

I saw Sprint wasn't on the sheet so yeah I wouldn't have been able to use it anyway )=

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:21

FlapYoJacks: Feb 12, 2009

It's me, I'm the 3 inch lift on the sneakers.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:21

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

all those apple factories now run on clean energy, except for foxconn they aren't apple

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:21

TraderStav: May 19, 2006; It feels like I was standing my entire life and I just sat down

MarcusSA posted:

I'd really like to be able to ditch my work phone and just have one phone but my work phone is managed by IT so I doubt they'd do it.

Always keep work/personal separate. You want to be able to hand them your phone in an instant without caring if they need it. Piece of mind is worth the inconvenience. Don't have to worry about backing up or wiping anything personal.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:21

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

This segment's production is the biggest waste of money in Apple's entire budget. Sum it up in a one-pager press release, no one gives a poo poo.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:21

trilobite terror: Oct 20, 2007; BUT MY LIVELIHOOD DEPENDS ON THE FORUMS!

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

*gives you a mega swirly*

stop no I have psoriasis

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:22

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

100% recycled iPhone!

Wood iPhone!

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:22

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

ah poo poo no more Blood Crystals for the iphone

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:22

Lucky Guy: Jan 24, 2013; TY for no bm

We're happy to announce that all suicide nets installed at Foxconn factories have been made with 100% recycled materials

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:22

ChadSexington: Aug 12, 2004; I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.

AlternateAccount posted:

This segment's production is the biggest waste of money in Apple's entire budget. Sum it up in a one-pager press release, no one gives a poo poo.

Gotta kill some time before announcing the PoorPhone.

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:23

repiv: Aug 13, 2009

Electric Bugaloo posted:

Just get one and if you don�t like it return it. My S3 is totally inessential but I also like it a lot and find myself using it for poo poo all the time.

It frustrates me to no end that Apple remains obstinate about never pushing for a unified controller standard or ecosystem for that poo poo. Like, I get that in 2010 Jobs didn�t want devs leaning on peripheral accessories because he wanted to normalize multitouch and force devs to make good apps for it �so that you never need to connect anything to your phone/tablet to make it good� but it�s 2018 and people run loving PUBG on their iPhones but Apple insists on games being almost exclusively �touch first�.

The Nintendo Switch has a Tegra from 2015 and a 720p screen but everybody�s falling over themselves to port poo poo like DOOM to it with great results, and that�s on top of Nintendo still having the most busted rear end online service and digital software store in the industry. Meanwhile iOS hardware from like the last 3 years runs performance circles around the Switch and Apple has the App Store/online backup/etc benchmark but that poo poo�s for mobile games and tappity-tap garbage because nobody wants to make a loving controller for it and Apple has no interest in fostering that development when they�re raking in all of those Pok�mon Go bucks.

Like, literally call up 8bitDo and be like �we�ll take care of the certification process but you gotta sell some controllers in our stores� or Microsoft and be like �your console is getting the crap kicked out of it. Make the XBone controller iOS compatible and we�ll stock it� and be done. Both 8bitDo and Microsoft controllers already natively work with Mac OS so the absence on iOS is literally because nobody-most critically Apple- see a point to it. The only controllers Apple sells are those POS Steelseries ones from 2012 that cost like $100. This is why we can�t have Skyrim on iOS.

the switch has good games because people are willing to drop $60 for a game on there, but on a phone people lose their poo poo if you have the audacity to charge more than a dollar

# ? Sep 12, 2018 19:23