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Pastry of the Year posted:Wasn't this basically an entire arc for Hank in a recent season of Venture Bros.? Kind of? More the mob boss made a fairly half-assed attempt to recruit Hank by saying he can date his daughter if Hank's willing to execute an intruder. Things get even more farcical from there.
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Mar 20, 2019 14:43
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Man in wheelchair throws shoe at cockroach. Shoe has gun in it.
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Mar 20, 2019 22:44
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https://twitter.com/merica/status/1108564763003547648
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Mar 21, 2019 04:27
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Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza
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Mar 22, 2019 05:38
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ultrafilter posted:Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza This is so frustrating because Coldplay lyrics aren't memorable enough to make good jokes out of this
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Mar 22, 2019 17:03
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Sir Lemming posted:This is so frustrating because Coldplay lyrics aren't memorable enough to make good jokes out of this They tried?  That's about all I can say.
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Mar 22, 2019 17:35
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In very old weird news I just discovered that not only did the king of Tonga have a court jester in 2003, but he was embroiled in an embezzlement scandal.
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Mar 23, 2019 19:16
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chitoryu12 posted:In very old weird news I just discovered that not only did the king of Tonga have a court jester in 2003, but he was embroiled in an embezzlement scandal. Having an Eurmali in your clan ring always carries a bit of risk.
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Mar 23, 2019 19:23
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chitoryu12 posted:In very old weird news I just discovered that not only did the king of Tonga have a court jester in 2003, but he was embroiled in an embezzlement scandal. How weird, he's from the Bogdonoff clan too
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Mar 23, 2019 23:35
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A group of Brexiteers are actually calling themselves the 'Grand Wizards'
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Mar 25, 2019 23:57
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Mar 26, 2019 22:30
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Getting high on your own supply Mr. Toad?
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Mar 26, 2019 22:41
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By popular demand posted:Getting high on your own supply Mr. Toad? Poisonous amphibians do often poison themselves a bit when they are forced to use it.
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Mar 27, 2019 05:29
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Briton arrested after fleeing Australia on a jetski, armed with crossbowquote:A wanted British man has attempted to flee Australia on a jetski, travelling almost 150km (93 miles) across the Torres Strait while armed with a crossbow. He got pretty close: 
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Mar 28, 2019 03:07
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That's...actually very impressive.
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Mar 28, 2019 03:15
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US Is Forcing a Chinese Firm to Sell Gay Dating App Grindr It's a national security risk, you see.
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Mar 28, 2019 04:08
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mrkillboy posted:Briton arrested after fleeing Australia on a jetski, armed with crossbow  Weird map fact: Australian territory goes right up to and includes the island in the estuary mouth of the two South flowing rivers below the "New" in Papua New Guinea.
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Mar 28, 2019 11:05
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https://twitter.com/BBCWorld/status/1111242097301118977
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Mar 28, 2019 15:36
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The people behind Lasagna Cat are really dedicated.
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Mar 28, 2019 15:42
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Lmao that last paragraphquote:In the meantime, both Ar Viltansou and local officials say they will continue to harvest Garfields from the coastline.
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Mar 28, 2019 20:44
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https://twitter.com/william_fitz/status/1111457467517403137
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Mar 29, 2019 04:13
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Mar 29, 2019 18:39
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyoRTNSyJ1k
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Mar 29, 2019 20:18
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I really need to learn to stop googling these things to check if they're true. If not for gorilla channel I think I'd be a complete cynic by now.
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Mar 30, 2019 10:12
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jojoinnit posted:I really need to learn to stop googling these things to check if they're true. If not for gorilla channel I think I'd be a complete cynic by now. An image without any source is fake nearly 100% of the time.
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Mar 30, 2019 11:43
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Double Punctuation posted:An image without any source is fake nearly 100% of the time. No, he did indeed praise the lakes for their record deepness.
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Mar 30, 2019 11:47
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jojoinnit posted:No, he did indeed praise the lakes for their record deepness. He praised the Lakes up near Canada
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Mar 30, 2019 16:10
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Absurd Alhazred posted:He praised the Lakes up near Canada He was less than complimentary about the rains down in Africa.
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Mar 30, 2019 16:14
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Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:He was less than complimentary about the rains down in Africa. 
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Mar 30, 2019 16:17
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Republican lawmaker prays for forgiveness as Pennsylvania State House swears in a Muslim woman. She however claims that is how she prays every day, which does not make her look any better. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLVrgWygwQo
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Mar 30, 2019 16:39
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The MSJ posted:Republican lawmaker prays for forgiveness as Pennsylvania State House swears in a Muslim woman. She however claims that is how she prays every day, which does not make her look any better. So on the one hand, asking for forgiveness all of the time is pretty common in Catholicism at least, so she almost has a defense there. But also she goes so far out of her way to make sure that you know that she thinks people not following Jesus is not only why the country is bad, but also somehow not what the founding fathers intended, really makes the message incredibly clear. That's not a prayer, that's a sermon.
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Mar 30, 2019 16:53
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5“Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by people. I assure you: They’ve got their reward 6 But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.7 When you pray, don’t babble like the idolaters,h since they imagine they’ll be heard for their many words. 8 Don’t be like them, because your Father knows the things you need before you ask Him.
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Mar 30, 2019 16:57
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Terrible Opinions posted:5“Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by people. I assure you: They’ve got their reward 6 But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.7 When you pray, don’t babble like the idolaters,h since they imagine they’ll be heard for their many words. 8 Don’t be like them, because your Father knows the things you need before you ask Him. No, you see, only the parts of the Bible that support her viewpoints are the true words of God. The rest is made up bullshit.
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Mar 31, 2019 00:04
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https://twitter.com/Neuro_Skeptic/status/1111987357136363520
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Mar 31, 2019 01:04
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I have a theory that playing Skrillex music stops anyone from having sex.
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Mar 31, 2019 02:09
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I would say his music sucks, but apparently not.
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Mar 31, 2019 03:40
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im surprised skrillex still exists actually, does he?
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Mar 31, 2019 10:10
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Krankenstyle posted:im surprised skrillex still exists Yeah, he’s alive and well at 31. I’d like to make some crack about him missing out on the 27 club but I think they only accept musicians.
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Mar 31, 2019 13:07
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Mar 31, 2019 14:49
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THEIR MULTIPLYING!I
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Mar 31, 2019 14:54
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