r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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Penguissimo: Apr 7, 2007

hawowanlawow posted:

nah it's used by tons of working class dudes, you just don't know any apparently lol

I have some bad news for you about how tons of dudes from all classes view women

# ? Mar 13, 2020 13:44

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# ? May 1, 2024 13:08

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

Penguissimo posted:

I have some bad news for you about how tons of dudes from all classes view women

I'm not saying it's good. The poster I quoted was just saying it's used exclusively by the internet nerds they're an expert on, which is untrue

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:02

threelemmings: Dec 4, 2007; A jellyfish!

Penguissimo posted:

I have some bad news for you about how tons of dudes from all classes view women

You hear the same phrasing from women around here, it's definitely a class/culture thing. i.e: "I don't want him around some other female." Or "I'm a female, he can't put his hands on me!" Generally used more when referring to other women or women in general.

threelemmings fucked around with this message at 14:12 on Mar 13, 2020

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:06

Serephina: Nov 8, 2005; 恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

It's super common in proto-incel circles (MRA, PUA, MGToW and such) and basically nowhere else. I've never seen it used by someone who regards women as fully realized human beings.

That sentence alone tells you exactly what kind of workplace she's at.

hawowanlawow posted:

nah it's used by tons of working class dudes, you just don't know any apparently lol

Cheers for that guys. Also here's the *thing*: all of these posts are written in the first person, as if it's a woman who's calling herself an "30-year old female". It's not exactly subtle.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:07

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA if I don�t want to repair a bridge a family member burnt down and just thinks it should all be water under said bridge.

quote:

Good Evening wonderful Judges Of reddit, I am mobile etc etc. now let�s get into why you stopped by today.

About a decade ago my older sister Nancy (fake name) got engaged to Timmy (also fake) and when they announced it to our family we couldn�t have been happier. Since our immediate family is in the south we�re all our other family is in the north we sat at the dinner table drinking champagne with my sister and her new fianc� calling all our family from the north getting all the congratulations and hoorays it was a truest peaceful time until Grandma attacked.

When my sister told my Grandparents she was engaged my Grandfather was over the moon he�d be able to attend her wedding, but my grandmother just kind of scoffed over the phone and said �congratulations I guess�. We were all a little taken aback and when we asked her to clarify she said �Since your so loose with your morals god knows how long this will last, you do tend to jump on the first guy that�s interested.� My sister ran off to her old room bawling her eyes out with her fianc� and my mother in tow, while my father is tearing into HIS mother with a stream of swearing and fury I not thought him capable of.

Fast forward my sister get married and has the first batch of grand babies on either side, she is still No Contact with Grandma as she has never apologized for her comments. For work I am staying in my hometown visiting some of our business partners for a few days. My dad calls me and asks if I would be willing to meet with her for lunch so she can have some relationship with her grand kids before she dies.

Here�s where I am have become an rear end. I told my dad that If she wanted a relationship with us she needed to fix things with my sister first before I would want to work on our relationship, and in pipes grandma from another line saying that it was so long ago who cares what she said was the truth. So I responded with a simple the next time I will be in the same room as you is when they are closing the casket and putting you in the ground, and hung up on them.

My grandmother is upset I would say that and my dad agrees but my sister thanked me for having her back, but said I may have been too harsh on someone just trying to mend a broken relationship.

So AITA for basically telling my bitch of a grandmother the next time we are in the same room will be her funeral.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:16

AngryRobotsInc: Aug 2, 2011

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

It's super common in proto-incel circles (MRA, PUA, MGToW and such) and basically nowhere else. I've never seen it used by someone who regards women as fully realized human beings.

That sentence alone tells you exactly what kind of workplace she's at.

"Adult human female" is also common from TERFs.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:17

threelemmings: Dec 4, 2007; A jellyfish!

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA if I don’t want to repair a bridge a family member burnt down and just thinks it should all be water under said bridge.

So I responded with a simple the next time I will be in the same room as you is when they are closing the casket and putting you in the ground, and hung up on them.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:22

D34THROW: Jan 29, 2012; RETAIL RETAIL LISTEN TO ME BITCH ABOUT RETAIL

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not hiding my �feminine issues� from my dad?

What a loving rear end. My wife has endometriosis and my mother-in-law who lives with us has been going through menopause since I've been with my wife. Not once do I flinch or get grossed out talking about :airquote:

feminine issues :airquote:

. It is a natural loving thing and women talk about it because it's a loving part of being a woman. God drat people like this piss me off.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:25

avoid doorways: Jun 6, 2010; 'twas brillig; Gun Saliva

AITA for getting my dad fired?

quote:

I (m15) have type 1 diabetes. I was diagnosed 2 years ago, and still have some trouble keeping my blood sugar at a normal level. I have often found myself in the ER for multiple days due to diabetes related issues.

My dad (47) worked at a Pietro's Pizza as a tech guy, keeping all the arcades and whatnot in shape. He made decent money.

I attend highschool from 8am to 3pm, and he barely has enough time to drop me off at school before he gets to work.

Now here's where the question is begged:

If I had been in several potentially dangerous situations due to diabetes, during school, while my dad was working, and required him to leave work to pick me up several days resulting in him getting fired... Am I the rear end in a top hat?

He sure seems pissed at me, and I feel like it wasn't really my fault. Sure I may have forgotten a dose of insulin every now and then, but the consequences of that seem a lot more threatening than being jobless.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:36

MightyJoe36: Dec 29, 2013; Cat Army

D34THROW posted:

What a loving rear end. My wife has endometriosis and my mother-in-law who lives with us has been going through menopause since I've been with my wife. Not once do I flinch or get grossed out talking about feminine issues . It is a natural loving thing and women talk about it because it's a loving part of being a woman. God drat people like this piss me off.

My wife is actually more sensitive talking about :airquote:

feminine issues :airquote:

than I am.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:37

The Bramble: Mar 16, 2004

Licarn posted:

AITA for getting my dad fired?

Sounds like a great opportunity for dad to help his son understand the economic consequences of him forgetting to take his diabetes seriously when the budget cuts come from the kids interests and hobbies first.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:46

Alien Sex Manual: Dec 14, 2010; is not a sandwich

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

It's super common in proto-incel circles (MRA, PUA, MGToW and such) and basically nowhere else. I've never seen it used by someone who regards women as fully realized human beings.

That sentence alone tells you exactly what kind of workplace she's at.

I know a lot of black men and women who say �females� as well, honestly. It seems to be very popular among military as well.

I mean I know that isn�t mutually exclusive with your point about people who say it having disdain for women but it�s not exclusive to the manosphere.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 14:54

Transmogrifier: Dec 10, 2004; Systems at max!; Lipstick Apathy

Alien Sex Manual posted:

I know a lot of black men and women who say “females” as well, honestly. It seems to be very popular among military as well.

I mean I know that isn’t mutually exclusive with your point about people who say it having disdain for women but it’s not exclusive to the manosphere.

You're taught to refer to persons by the terms male and female in the military during basic. I forget their excuse for it.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:09

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Transmogrifier posted:

You're taught to refer to persons by the terms male and female in the military during basic. I forget their excuse for it.

Probably uniformity. That's usually the answer for everything in the military.

Having a slew of men/women/girls/boys/guys/gals/etc all over policy directives and orders would look kinda crazy.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:13

Iceache: Jul 9, 2009

Iceache posted:

Smirking_Serpent posted:
AITA for not wanting to get part of my tattoo removed or covered up?

When he's loving her doggy style he should salute the fallen heroes and just live with it.

Oh yeah baby, I'm coming *cums all over the dead ex's commemorative tattoo*

Now this is called a tribute

Kitchner posted:

I know it's a bit sad but when I read the thing this was basically what occurred to me to, is that you'll see it staring at you if you're going at it doggy style or reverse cowgirl.

Thing is though, if you did that a lot, how the gently caress wouldn't you have questioned it before?

Like if I was having sex with some girl, and for the entire 10 seconds of having sex I had to look at some dudes name on her back, I reckon I'd probably ask her who it was at some point after (I'd probably need to get another good look at it first, you can't read it properly in such a short space of time).

I dunno it's hard for me to see under all the blankets to hide the shame.

But the way the new boyfriend (who is now also the ex) treated her like a property, maybe he's worried that someone else has claimed her with a name tag and he cannot assume a sole ownership.

Iceache fucked around with this message at 15:19 on Mar 13, 2020

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:13

Chad Sexington: May 26, 2005; I think he made a beautiful post and did a great job and he is good.

HIJK posted:

I agree with you but I also don't think Disney is going to close their American branches.

I guess its something that only we'll only get to see with time.

Quoting from the past just to point out how wrong you were.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

Aita for calling stepmom out on her second wife syndrome after she ruined my dance studio?

I definitely think step-mom is trying to erase the old kids, but the entitlement here is hilarious.

Like you're in college most of the time and you think a "dance studio" should be preserved for you in a house with two babies? Sorry, no, in no world does that happen.

Chad Sexington fucked around with this message at 15:22 on Mar 13, 2020

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:14

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for "flaunting my wealth" at work, and refusing to stop?

quote:

I work in a small engineering firm with about 8 people. We all make good money, but I am young, debt free, and have very few expenses. So compared to the older guys who have kids, mortgages, amd other stuff I have a pretty high amount of disposable income. I order expensive PC parts into the office, have a small collection of watches, and like to wear quality work clothes to make sure I look professional. Thats really all I do. I dont discuss salary with anyone, I dont talk about how much these things cost, I just wear my clothes and watches and occasionally get packages delivered. Ill talk about things if asked (one of my coworkers likes computers as well so will talk to me about my PC components) but I dont bring it up of my own accord.

One of my coworkers, X, is the opposite. He is older, has 2 young kids, a house he is paying off, and his wife is unemployed. He dresses quite poorly for an office setting (ill fitting clothes, jeans, sneakers) however I have never made any comment on his attire or his situation.

The boss pulled me aside the other day to discuss something, and it turns out X has made a complaint that I am making him uncomfortable by openly having spending money, which he does not have. I was asked to stop ordering things into the office unless absolutely necessary (fair enough) and to "tone down" my work attire. I asked what this meant, and was told to: - Wear only one watch to work every day, instead of changing the watch to match my clothes. - wear more generic style business shirts - wear a more plain pair of leather shoes

I said no, that is unreasonable. As long as I look professional it shouldn't matter what I wear, and if that makes people uncomfortable then it's their issue, not mine. So unless their is a formal change to the dress code I will continue to wear what I have been wearing. I also said that if the boss wants everyone to look unprofessional that's his call, but I didnt agree with it. I was then told to expect a formal warning and that we would have a further discussion on friday (tomorrow). I dont think im wrong, but i would like an outside opinion on the matter.

AITA for this?

EDIT: Yes, my boss is also my dad. But it is an ENGINEERING firm, so I didnt just get given the job. I have had to work for qualifications just like everyone else. I work hard and pull my weight as I would with any job. I did not start at a higher salary, I am on an entry level salary as you would expect from any one else. I did not mention this as when it comes to business the father-son dynamic is practically non existent, he is the employer and director and I am an employee and consultant. As for packages being delivered, it was every couple of months at the most frequent, not multiple times a day or even week.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:30

Sir DonkeyPunch: Mar 23, 2007; I didn't hear no bell

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for "flaunting my wealth" at work, and refusing to stop?

what a twist

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:38

henkman: Oct 8, 2008

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for "flaunting my wealth" at work, and refusing to stop?

lmao

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:39

DaveSauce: Feb 15, 2004; Oh, how awkward.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for "flaunting my wealth" at work, and refusing to stop?

quote:
But it is an ENGINEERING firm, so I didnt just get given the job. I have had to work for qualifications just like everyone else.

Having worked for several small/mid-sized companies in an engineering capacity: this is the biggest load of poo poo ever.

But that aside, Daddy is learning a harsh lesson about nepotism: you could be the most even-handed "boss" ever and you will NEVER shake the impression that you're giving your kid/wife/sibling/cousin/whoever special treatment. Ever. Either ignore it or avoid hiring family. Honestly this is probably going to be perceived as an obvious attempt to hide whatever advantage he's giving the spoiled kid, and it won't make any difference because the kid will probably screw it up anyhow.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:40

Iceache: Jul 9, 2009

Dad sounds smart enough not to raise a too entitled of a son.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:40

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

someone found an older AITA post, and OP apparently is autistic and can't get along with any of his coworkers, so there might be more to the story...

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:41

FUCKFACE MORON: Apr 23, 2010; by sebmojo

Sir DonkeyPunch posted:

what a twist

Going through the comments there is another twist he's autistic

e: beaten

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:48

DreamingofRoses: Jun 27, 2013; Nap Ghost

Better Than You posted:

Going through the comments there is another twist he's autistic

e: beaten

I actually find the fact that his coworkers have complained about his �social skills� before more relevant. The autism plays a part but not all people on the spectrum are assholes

# ? Mar 13, 2020 15:51

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Chad Sexington posted:

Quoting from the past just to point out how wrong you were.

Lmao at least they're covering their asses. I guess the alternative would be to keep the parks open and let people get sick in droves, they don't want to open themselves to that kind of liability.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:01

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

The dude changes watches multiple times a day?

Lol, I change my cheap rear end watch every couple of years when it inevitably just stops working from abuse.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:03

Photux: Sep 3, 2012; Funny then, that such darkness gives me hope

spacetoaster posted:

The dude changes watches multiple times a day?

Lol, I change my cheap rear end watch every couple of years when it inevitably just stops working from abuse.

That's what I thought at first, but upon re-reading I think he means to say he wears different watches to work on different days, and he is being recommended to wear the same watch every day.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:08

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA if I don�t want to repair a bridge a family member burnt down and just thinks it should all be water under said bridge.
So I responded with a simple the next time I will be in the same room as you is when they are closing the casket and putting you in the ground

And a new contender for the most :coal:

person in the thread.

Good on OP for having her sister's back.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:13

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Photux posted:

That's what I thought at first, but upon re-reading I think he means to say he wears different watches to work on different days, and he is being recommended to wear the same watch every day.

Ah, yes, I can see that now.

I'm also betting the "wealth" he's displaying was not the reason for the complaint.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:18

Betazoid: Aug 3, 2010; Hallo. Ik ben een leeuw.

spacetoaster posted:

Probably uniformity. That's usually the answer for everything in the military.

Having a slew of men/women/girls/boys/guys/gals/etc all over policy directives and orders would look kinda crazy.

Same with people I know in law enforcement, government, and military. Male and female are nouns for them. It sounds stupid and is grammatically incorrect, though!

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:19

Serephina: Nov 8, 2005; 恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

quote:

Wear only one watch to work every day

What?!

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:21

Pham Nuwen: Oct 30, 2010

Betazoid posted:

Same with people I know in law enforcement, government, and military. Male and female are nouns for them. It sounds stupid and is grammatically incorrect, though!

They're nouns for lots of people, including dictionary writers:

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/male

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/male#Noun

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:24

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for "flaunting my wealth" at work, and refusing to stop?

I'm not biting the hand that feeds me, I feed myself by my own bootstraps and the hand is only there incidentally

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:26

Dazerbeams: Jul 8, 2009

Using male and female to refer to people is objectively dehumanizing, hence the police and military language. And internalized misogyny and racism is nothing new to hear about.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:26

Hirayuki: Mar 28, 2010

r/relationships: I gave my balls a tug and kept on rolling.

(Throw it in the queue--the current title should be staying put for a good long while yet.)

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:27

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

quote:

EDIT: Yes, my boss is also my dad.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:27

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

dad boss, so what

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:28

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for siding with the bride on bridesmaids hair color?

quote:

I've been friends with 2 girls since early highschool, and we're now all 30. One is recently getting married. She has asked myself and our other friend (we'll call her Bridesmaid) months ago to be bridesmaids. Bride is usually a very chill person, for reference.

Bridesmaid likes to frequently dye her hair. She decided a few months ago to dye it fire engine red. Bride didn't like the color, and checked in and asking if bridesmaid would keep it for the wedding, which she said she would not. Fast forward to it being a month before the wedding. After a lot of back and forth, bridesmaid finally said she would not dye her hair another color, and intended to keep the bright red.

The bride is very upset, to the point that she no longer wants bridesmaid in the wedding. She told the bridesmaid that the wedding and photographer are expensive, it's her day, etc. I felt this was an overreaction, until we both realized this was a pattern of behavior for bridesmaid. She is frequently needing to be the center of attention and have "unfixable problems".

I was made to speak with the bridesmaid, where she explained that the very red hair color was, in her mind, the Crux to her current self esteem and that the bride asking her to change it was akin to her asking her to have plastic surgery.

I'm caught between two friends, but really I side with the bride. Bridesmaid repeatedly promised a more natural and unassuming color for months, and suddenly won't change it.

I'm to the point that I think after the wedding I will cut bridesmaid out of my life, which is another thing to unpack. I live across the country from her, so we haven't had super close contact for years but she still doesn't understand I don't usually enjoy seeing her when I do go home.

Edit/info: Bridesmaid's hair has always been a natural dyed color before the fire engine red phase which was after the "will you be my bridesmaid" ask

Help!

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:28

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

How did his dad being the boss even come up? It's not referenced in the text at all, unless someone casually went "Dude, he's acting like your dad" and he went "Actually yes!"

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:31

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# ? May 1, 2024 13:08

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

i think someone went through his post history, asked about it, and then other people piled on so he made the edit.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 16:32

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