[COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

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facetoucher cat: Dec 20, 2013; by sebmojo

https://twitter.com/TODAYonline/status/1252771874989203457

Let the culling of celebrities begin, sorry we had to start here

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:51

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 29, 2024 12:07

Steve Yun: Aug 7, 2003; I'm a parasitic landlord that needs to get a job instead of stealing worker's money. Make sure to remind me when I post.; Soiled Meat

https://www.instagram.com/p/B_Y8WIhgEN3/?igshid=1jc6j6gskup40

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:52

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/TODAYonline/status/1252771874989203457

Let the culling of celebrities begin, sorry we had to start here

lmao at the future (which is now :vince:

)

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:52

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/TODAYonline/status/1252771874989203457

Let the culling of celebrities begin, sorry we had to start here

I like how they left out "try" or "attempt" in that headline

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:52

Impkins Patootie: Apr 20, 2017

weather changes moods

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:53

Iron Crowned: May 6, 2003; by Hand Knit

There's a little Tom Hanks in all of us :gbsmith:

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:54

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

wow tom hanks saved america time 2 go to golden corral and stick my hands in all the food like normal thank u captain phillips

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:55

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

the fake laws dont protect u anymore soros i know my rights thank you mr hank

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:55

seattle plague rat: Apr 6, 2020

goddam ccelebrities cutting good hardworking americans out of the used blood market

my antibodies can compete same as any but no hanks is at the front of the line

well fine, gently caress em ill sell it on etsy

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:57

shovelbum: Oct 21, 2010; Fun Shoe

The lack of accurate numbers and tests really sucks but it's a fundamentally political problem and the countries/regions with better testing regimes have provided us priceless data on the way this disease moves through a population. The numbers will never be perfect but they can be improved to a point where they are much more useful, and right now this is being deliberately suppressed in much of the US lol.

A lot of the virgin/chad or 'goes brrrr' memes are designed to make 'doing nothing' seem like the optimal response to tough situations and I think this serves some p reactionary causes well bc gently caress genx 'lol nothing matters' ennui imo

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:57

Shima Honnou: Dec 1, 2010; The Once And Future King Of Dicetroit; College Slice

doingitwrong posted:

please president xi save us

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:58

Sharkie: Feb 4, 2013; by Fluffdaddy

shovelbum posted:

The lack of accurate numbers and tests really sucks but it's a fundamentally political problem and the countries/regions with better testing regimes have provided us priceless data on the way this disease moves through a population. The numbers will never be perfect but they can be improved to a point where they are much more useful, and right now this is being deliberately suppressed in much of the US lol.

A lot of the virgin/chad or 'goes brrrr' memes are designed to make 'doing nothing' seem like the optimal response to tough situations and I think this serves some p reactionary causes well bc gently caress genx 'lol nothing matters' ennui imo

i heard we had accurate numbers but they were stolen by feral cats

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:59

Amp: Sep 10, 2010

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/TODAYonline/status/1252771874989203457

Let the culling of celebrities begin, sorry we had to start here

This is a cover for them trying get Epstein's DNA inside all of us

# ? Apr 25, 2020 22:59

The Anime Liker: Aug 8, 2009; by VideoGames

In February I had to go to the ER because my BP was 182/120 and I was semi-delirious.

For context, I'm a healthy, active 6'5" 39 year old. I'm on Lisinopril because I just have poo poo blood pressure as most people my size do. As part of my health regimen I've avoided salt and don't eat sodium-loaded packaged food. For a few weeks before my hospital trip I was getting cramps so I was pounding bananas and oranges and raisins and all kinds of potassium-rich food.

So the ER runs my blood panels, and I'm expecting to hear I eat too much salt and my liver is dying and I have kidney failure, etc.

My nurse comes in and asks about my diet, I run her through all that, waiting for the bomb to drop.

She tells me I'm healthy as a horse but my sodium level is catastrophically low. That's it. So she gives me an IV of wide open normal saline and I get a doctor's advice to start putting salt on my food.

I leave feeling pretty good and go home and just loving annihilate some leftover taco meat with a heaping spoon of salt and I feel like a million bucks.

Absolutely wild. And that's why I owe the ER $2,000. Salt paranoia.

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:01

BONGHITZ: Jan 1, 1970

i eat trash and i love it, dominos pizza every day

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:03

BONGHITZ: Jan 1, 1970

saints gambit posted:

Tell us more about your hot vet.

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:04

Relevant Tangent: Nov 18, 2016; Tangentially Relevant

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

https://mobile.twitter.com/CBSNews/status/1254122960815874053

trump trying to stop the deep state

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:05

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Iron Crowned posted:

There's a little Tom Hanks in all of us

you looking at a mirror: "Look at me: I am the Tom Hanks now"

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:06

corn haver: Mar 28, 2020

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/TODAYonline/status/1252771874989203457

Let the culling of celebrities begin, sorry we had to start here

tom, thanks

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:07

Trixie Hardcore: Jul 1, 2006; Placeholder.

Spinz posted:

When I finally went to a doctor after 20 yrs my BP was 180 over 110 all the time no poo poo
It's 135 over 85 rn no meds and I'm 50.
You can do this and it's shockingly simple. Quit smoking this second. (I did cold effing turkey) Cut salt way the gently caress down and start eating a poo poo ton of roasted veggies. Can you get boxes delivered by chance, or just load the gently caress up when you shop, fresh and frozen because the point is to lose weight and eat healthy.

Just 10 POUNDS will noticeably help your BP.

Probably should get on losartan not Lisinopril but that's up to your doctor. The idea is to get off meds after you've done all this -- I was able to and again I'm 50 and smoked for 30 YEARS with untreated high BP for 20 of it.

Start exercising if you aren't. I dropped 35 lbs just walking fast and gorging on veggies. The beauty of salads and veggies is you can eat a fuckton and still lose weight.

If you are an alcoholic or do coke or meth then it's way harder obviously. Pm me if you want to talk about any of this. BP CAN be fixed in the great majority of cases hooray.

I have normal blood pressure but a medication I take is for high blood pressure and I have to take it before bed because once it starts kicking in whoo boy it�s a loving ride into oblivion. Gotta get in a prone position before the inescapable sinking sensation takes over or I�m in for a real bad time. Just felt like sharing because it�s scary.

rabidcowfromhell posted:

Amazing cloning work!

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:08

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

i think of demons posted:

tom, thanks

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:09

Steve Yun: Aug 7, 2003; I'm a parasitic landlord that needs to get a job instead of stealing worker's money. Make sure to remind me when I post.; Soiled Meat

A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:

Absolutely wild. And that's why I owe the ER $2,000. Salt paranoia.

You owe the ER $2000 because we have a lovely profit-motive healthcare system

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:09

Renaissance Spam: Jun 5, 2010; Can it wait a for a bit? I'm in the middle of some *gyrations*

Alan Smithee posted:

you looking at a mirror: "Look at me: I am the Tom Hanks now"

Sure that's the start, but the more you think about that the more the Hanks blood gains in strength until you become linked into the Hanksweb. Soon we shall all be of the Hanks.

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:10

Scrub-Niggurath: Nov 27, 2007

Mons Hubris posted:

tbh I�m getting a little depressed at all the no immunity news the past few days

no evidence of immunity is not the same as evidence of no immunity

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:10

seattle plague rat: Apr 6, 2020

A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:

In February I had to go to the ER because my BP was 182/120 and I was semi-delirious.

For context, I'm a healthy, active 6'5" 39 year old. I'm on Lisinopril because I just have poo poo blood pressure as most people my size do. As part of my health regimen I've avoided salt and don't eat sodium-loaded packaged food. For a few weeks before my hospital trip I was getting cramps so I was pounding bananas and oranges and raisins and all kinds of potassium-rich food.

So the ER runs my blood panels, and I'm expecting to hear I eat too much salt and my liver is dying and I have kidney failure, etc.

My nurse comes in and asks about my diet, I run her through all that, waiting for the bomb to drop.

She tells me I'm healthy as a horse but my sodium level is catastrophically low. That's it. So she gives me an IV of wide open normal saline and I get a doctor's advice to start putting salt on my food.

I leave feeling pretty good and go home and just loving annihilate some leftover taco meat with a heaping spoon of salt and I feel like a million bucks.

Absolutely wild. And that's why I owe the ER $2,000. Salt paranoia.

lol u got prescribed a salt lick

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:11

Marx Headroom: May 10, 2007; AT LAST! A show with nonono ~~commercials~~!; Fallen Rib

Steve Yun posted:

https://www.instagram.com/p/B_Y8WIhgEN3/?igshid=1jc6j6gskup40

Barkley Shut Up and Jam Gaiden sequel looking good

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:11

Happy Thread: Jul 10, 2005; by Fluffdaddy; Plaster Town Cop

Before I could check the day's news I sat there refreshing until the number said this, refusing to read any of the thread beforehand

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:13

Durf: Aug 16, 2017

Iron Crowned posted:

There's a little Tom Hanks in all of us

argggh gotta pee real baaaad

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:13

RealityWarCriminal: Aug 10, 2016

seattle plague rat posted:

lol u got prescribed a salt lick

healthy as a horse

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:16

Spergin Morlock: Aug 8, 2009; Fun Shoe

Renaissance Spam posted:

Sure that's the start, but the more you think about that the more the Hanks blood gains in strength until you become linked into the Hanksweb. Soon we shall all be of the Hanks.

dopey Emma Watson voice] where do all the antibodies go?

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:16

Squizzle: Apr 24, 2008

hanx for the memories (of antibody production)

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:16

Reverend Dr: Feb 9, 2005; Thanks Reverend

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/TODAYonline/status/1252771874989203457

Let the culling of celebrities begin, sorry we had to start here

Our celebrity worship culture takes a dark turn as society has to start consuming its celebrities to continue to exist.

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:16

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

Steve Yun posted:

https://www.instagram.com/p/B_Y8WIhgEN3/?igshid=1jc6j6gskup40

an ounce of prevention is worth 239 lb of cure

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:18

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:

In February I had to go to the ER because my BP was 182/120 and I was semi-delirious.

For context, I'm a healthy, active 6'5" 39 year old. I'm on Lisinopril because I just have poo poo blood pressure as most people my size do. As part of my health regimen I've avoided salt and don't eat sodium-loaded packaged food. For a few weeks before my hospital trip I was getting cramps so I was pounding bananas and oranges and raisins and all kinds of potassium-rich food.

So the ER runs my blood panels, and I'm expecting to hear I eat too much salt and my liver is dying and I have kidney failure, etc.

My nurse comes in and asks about my diet, I run her through all that, waiting for the bomb to drop.

She tells me I'm healthy as a horse but my sodium level is catastrophically low. That's it. So she gives me an IV of wide open normal saline and I get a doctor's advice to start putting salt on my food.

I leave feeling pretty good and go home and just loving annihilate some leftover taco meat with a heaping spoon of salt and I feel like a million bucks.

Absolutely wild. And that's why I owe the ER $2,000. Salt paranoia.

did they run any bloodwork because you were probably hyperkalemic

# ? Apr 25, 2020 23:18