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Antigravitas posted:Anyway, I'm a breadstremist. This is my idol: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernd_das_Brot If you're into bread why idolize a guy who burned the bread?
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Apr 11, 2021 22:17
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fizzymercury posted:I love this one because I once told a Brit I have a kettle I bought at the Wal-Mart on my counter and I use it every single day to make tea and they proceeded to explain to me that I don't have a real kettle, it's an American kettle, I must not be making real tea either. There is a difference between UK and US kettles since they use 240V vs our 120V, but all that means is it boils a bit faster 
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Apr 11, 2021 22:17
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Antigravitas posted:Anyway, I'm a breadstremist. This is my idol: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernd_das_Brot
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Apr 11, 2021 22:28
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Grand Fromage posted:It's pretty weird. But it's easy to get strange impressions when you don't spend any time in a place. A lot of Europeans also think Kraft singles are the only cheese in the US or Hershey's is the only chocolate, too. Equivalent to if an American genuinely thinks UK food is just boiled meat or whatever. The only difference is it seems like that is usually a joke, while Europeans seem to really believe the US doesn't have bakeries or whatever. Grand Fromage posted:To be clear the generic Wonderbread poo poo in the US is bad. But any grocery store has like, fifty types of packaged bread and almost always has an in-house bakery that produces fresh stuff. Also they often sell parbaked loaves that you can bring home and toss in the oven for 15 minutes to finish, those are usually pretty good. zedprime posted:The average US supermarket has 50 different breads... and they are all sandwich loaf of varying colors! Haifisch has a new favorite as of 22:39 on Apr 11, 2021 |
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Apr 11, 2021 22:35
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Haifisch posted:Shock of shocks, if you assume that people only have access to the cheapest bottom of the barrel food option, you think all their food sucks! Euros are just particularly stubborn about this when talking about American food for some reason. I don't even care about it being sweet or not. As everybody keeps reminding about the stuff that isn't Hostess or Bunny, it tends not to be sweet at all in the grand scheme. You can get high quality sandwich bread! I just dislike all of those properties in bread compared to lower sugar approaches. American bakery sections might sell it in the form factor of a boule or baguette but it all tends to be sandwich bread because that's what most people like. I already said I'm OK with that. I'm the bread centrist, everyone is allowed to like sandwich bread. But I don't, which is also OK because I both have a goto bread at Trader Joes or for making some at home.
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Apr 11, 2021 22:49
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Alhazred posted:I have never put a sweetener in my dough when I've baked bread. And yet the dough rises. Witch!
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Apr 11, 2021 23:18
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I'm not a Eurogoon, just old, and I swear that regular supermarket bread has gotten sweeter over the last several decades. When I'm checking labels some of the worst offenders have 4g of sugar per slice, and they subjectively taste way too sweet. 1g per slice is usually okay, but even then it varies a lot between different brands and varieties of bread. The sweeter stuff might be okay with like peanut butter and jam, but is jarringly sweet with a normal savory lunchmeat.
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Apr 11, 2021 23:33
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I don't usually buy the run of the mill white bread, so I've never noticed. Jewish rye is my favorite 
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Apr 11, 2021 23:39
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Y'all know that all bread turns into sugar once you eat it, right?
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Apr 11, 2021 23:49
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Haifisch posted:Shock of shocks, if you assume that people only have access to the cheapest bottom of the barrel food option, you think all their food sucks! Euros are just particularly stubborn about this when talking about American food for some reason. I mean, seemingly half of this website talks about their poo poo upbringing in the Midwest raised on bland processed meals and how they've had to spend most of their adult lives training themselves to eat 'veggies' and try using spices in anything, and people regularly bemoan the food deserts in certain areas where you're beholden to Walmart or whatever and can't find any decent fresh produce. I'm exaggerating but that's the stereotype that comes across from a good amount of posters here, who skew way more towards the 'educated and actually considering their diet' end than the average US citizen. Of course anyone with a small amount of imagination or who has spent any time in the US would know there's excellent food to be found there but there's very good reasons most of the stereotypes exist. FWIW I think most people eat like poo poo in most western countries, and I'm one of the first to mock the French for the huge disconnect between their international culinary image vs the actual reality, given my first hand experience now living sandwiched between a bunch of western and central European countries. But certainly a lot of the industrialisation, fast food culture and race to the bottom in regards to food safety standards have been strongly driven by the US. Butterfly Valley has a new favorite as of 00:02 on Apr 12, 2021 |
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Apr 11, 2021 23:56
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Elviscat posted:Y'all know that all bread turns into sugar once you eat it, right? the wise man bowed his head solemnly and spoke: "theres actually zero difference between bread & sugar. you imbecile. you loving moron"
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Apr 11, 2021 23:57
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axolotl farmer posted:
Bill Bryson talks about bread adulteration in his book At Home, too. A relevant youtube: How much sawdust can you put in a rice crispy treat before people notice?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKDal51f5LU
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Apr 12, 2021 00:02
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I actually never buy the normal pre-sliced bread at the grocery store because I prefer getting a baguette, but I do occasionally buy premade sandwiches, and I just couldn't handle the ones in triangular boxes because all the filling got overshadowed by the sweetness of the thick slices of bread. I can believe it when people say increasing amount of sugar in bread is a real problem. But also #notallbreads. zedprime posted:American bakery sections might sell it in the form factor of a boule or baguette but it all tends to be sandwich bread because that's what most people like. I already said I'm OK with that. I'm the bread centrist, everyone is allowed to like sandwich bread. But I don't, which is also OK because I both have a goto bread at Trader Joes or for making some at home. You're talking crazy. At my grocery store in the bakery section, there's bread with soft crusts, there's bread with hard crusts, there's sourdough, there's focaccia, there's challah, there's the aforementioned partially-baked bread that you're meant to bake the rest of the way at home, there's bread that has various herbs mixed in, there's a bunch of kinds. It's been slimmer picking for me lately because I go to the grocery store late in the day after the bakery shuts down, and I think there's been a lot of complications since the pandemic started and aside from toilet paper, the other thing people were panic-buying was bread. I think bakeries also tend to be pretty variable even between stores from the same grocery store chain. There's also weird dense german rectangles in the import foods aisle that I'm uncomfortable about trying.
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Apr 12, 2021 00:04
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I was living in a shared house a few years ago and this guy came for a few weeks and left, leaving most of a loaf of cheap white bread in his cupboard. It had an American flag on the packet and in the 3 months I stayed on in that house the bread didn't go mouldy, decompose or otherwise change in any visibly discernible way. I know I can't blame the USA for having its flag printed on a loaf of undead bread in a country a few thousand miles away but it left an impression on me. I like to imagine it's still there, stoically resisting the ravages of time, while the rest of the house collapses under the weight of the landlady's hoarded piles of poo poo everywhere.
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Apr 12, 2021 00:11
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Apr 12, 2021 01:55
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Butterfly Valley posted:I was living in a shared house a few years ago and this guy came for a few weeks and left, leaving most of a loaf of cheap white bread in his cupboard. It had an American flag on the packet and in the 3 months I stayed on in that house the bread didn't go mouldy, decompose or otherwise change in any visibly discernible way. I know I can't blame the USA for having its flag printed on a loaf of undead bread in a country a few thousand miles away but it left an impression on me. I like to imagine it's still there, stoically resisting the ravages of time, while the rest of the house collapses under the weight of the landlady's hoarded piles of poo poo everywhere. I have half a loaf of Tim Horton's depressingly thin bread they use for paninis. It has not changed in three months and I see no reason that it ever will. It sits in a little bowl in the kitchen, for science if nothing else. Not gonna eat the drat thing.
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Apr 12, 2021 02:22
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Krab, cream cheese, white rice and cheeze? Sign me the gently caress up. Holy poo poo I'd do terrible things to eat that.
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Apr 12, 2021 02:33
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Is the use of flaming hot cheetos as a spice in itself the result of people who otherwise never deal with spicy things discovering them through the gateway of snacks and not wanting to find an independent balance of spices on their own?
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Apr 12, 2021 04:24
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SlothfulCobra posted:Is the use of flaming hot cheetos as a spice in itself the result of people who otherwise never deal with spicy things discovering them through the gateway of snacks and not wanting to find an independent balance of spices on their own? I think it is more of lets label it as spicy and americans might not want to try it; lets slap an exxxtream cheese snack that is spicy that they already love in there might get them to try it and maybe try some of our other products. Americans tend towards chili wussism.
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Apr 12, 2021 04:31
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The trick to making Americans like spice, judging by Flaming Hot Cheetos and Sriracha, is make spicy things for your ethnic group to save them from the sea of blandness, then the whites will have no choice but to culturally appropriate it.
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Apr 12, 2021 04:43
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Elviscat posted:The trick to making Americans like spice, judging by Flaming Hot Cheetos and Sriracha, is make spicy things for your ethnic group to save them from the sea of blandness, then the whites will have no choice but to culturally appropriate it. What are you Takis about?
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Apr 12, 2021 04:47
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rodbeard posted:No one is putting yeast in bread without adding some sort of sweetener for the yeast to eat. That's what makes dough rise. The sweetness comes from there being more sweetener for a recipe than what gets consumed by the yeast during the rise. Yeast can eat flour. It's slower than sugar, but it works.
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Apr 12, 2021 04:51
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Butterfly Valley posted:I mean, seemingly half of this website talks about their poo poo upbringing in the Midwest raised on bland processed meals and how they've had to spend most of their adult lives training themselves to eat 'veggies' and try using spices in anything, and people regularly bemoan the food deserts in certain areas where you're beholden to Walmart or whatever and can't find any decent fresh produce. I'm exaggerating but that's the stereotype that comes across from a good amount of posters here, who skew way more towards the 'educated and actually considering their diet' end than the average US citizen. That's another phenomenon where you can take the most apparently disillusioned, anti-nationalistic person who can't stop talking about how poo poo their country is, and the second you put them in front of a foreigner saying the same, they turn into a rabid jingoist asking to be allowed to enlist into the Air Force so they can drop the first nukes on the capital of the arrogant, ignorant dogs who insulted the greatest nation in the world by casting aspersions on the integrity of its bakeries.
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Apr 12, 2021 06:50
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steinrokkan posted:That's another phenomenon where you can take the most apparently disillusioned, anti-nationalistic person who can't stop talking about how poo poo their country is, and the second you put them in front of a foreigner saying the same, they turn into a rabid jingoist asking to be allowed to enlist into the Air Force so they can drop the first nukes on the capital of the arrogant, ignorant dogs who insulted the greatest nation in the world by casting aspersions on the integrity of its bakeries. "Nobody's allowed to call my shithead brother worthless but me!"
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Apr 12, 2021 07:07
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steinrokkan posted:That's another phenomenon where you can take the most apparently disillusioned, anti-nationalistic person who can't stop talking about how poo poo their country is, and the second you put them in front of a foreigner saying the same, they turn into a rabid jingoist asking to be allowed to enlist into the Air Force so they can drop the first nukes on the capital of the arrogant, ignorant dogs who insulted the greatest nation in the world by casting aspersions on the integrity of its bakeries. People called pride one of the seven deadly sins for a reason. 
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Apr 12, 2021 07:57
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https://twitter.com/mar_takagi/status/1381201232249847808
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Apr 12, 2021 08:02
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HelloIAmYourHeart posted:Bill Bryson talks about bread adulteration in his book At Home, too. I want to like this video, but goddamn turn down the twee
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Apr 12, 2021 12:49
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Cross-posting from the Comic Strip Megathread:Haifisch posted:Bonus: Dehumanize yourself and face to casserole. I made the casserole. 
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Apr 12, 2021 17:11
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Tiggum posted:Cross-posting from the Comic Strip Megathread: Man people really had to do a lot of work to get any flavors at all into their meals before it was legal to use spices
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Apr 12, 2021 17:22
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"Incorporate the stalks and leaves and roots in hot water until it becomes Green Wet. Remove from the heat and mix Green Wet with common kitchen dusts and midwest guilt until a scum forms. Envelope within the beigest meats at hand. For a milder dish, discard the scum."
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Apr 12, 2021 17:28
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smack barm green wet.Tiggum posted:Cross-posting from the Comic Strip Megathread: god bless, it's always welcome when someone in here volunteers themselves for something like this.
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Apr 12, 2021 17:29
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HAM Roll Up is my favorite No Limit song
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Apr 12, 2021 17:31
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Congratulations Elverta, here's your five bucks
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Apr 12, 2021 18:04
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Data Graham posted:Congratulations Elverta, here's your five bucks
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Apr 12, 2021 19:22
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cowboy
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FFT posted:Even accounting for inflation, that's still not even $20 lmao Times were tough then, she couldn't even afford a real name
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Apr 12, 2021 19:43
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I'd like to see the runnerup recipe for "Cheese Scalloped Carrots"
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Apr 12, 2021 19:46
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Grand Fromage posted:One of the strangest ones is I guess a lot of Brits and Australians think they're the only places in the world with kettles? When I moved to the US it was really hard to find an affordable electric kettle, I remember being baffled that they weren't easily available at like Target. Now 15 years later and you can get them basically everywhere, and all the friends who were equally baffled by my desire for one have one for themselves. And then I upgraded after spending time in Japan.  It's really easy to fall into a trap of "my way is the only way" when you don't get the chance to travel and assume everyone does things the same way you do (or if they don't, they're inferior somehow). I've lived in a bunch of places and there are good things and bad things about all of them. I'm really snobby about good sharp cheddar, and I'll go further out of my way to find a grocery store with a proper cheese counter rather than grab a pack off the shelf at Ralphs. Doesn't mean I'm gonna be lovely to my friend who buys Kraft or whatever.
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Apr 12, 2021 22:50
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Elviscat posted:Y'all know that all bread turns into sugar once you eat it, right?
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Apr 12, 2021 23:31
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Aardvark! posted:I'd like to see the runnerup recipe for "Cheese Scalloped Carrots" http://www.lostamericanrecipes.com/2019/04/cheese-scalloped-carrots-1963.html featuring 1/4 teaspoon pepper!
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Apr 13, 2021 00:57
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A 1/4th of a teaspoon! Mavis, call the police, there's a lunatic on the loose!
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Apr 13, 2021 01:07
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