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Too bad it's too late to submit stories for the IK challenge.
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Jun 17, 2021 22:06
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Submit it anyway
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Jun 17, 2021 22:37
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Zesty posted:Submit it anyway yea if anyone has a funny or interesting HP story then I want to read it
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Jun 17, 2021 23:13
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SlothfulCobra posted:I think that Harry Potter made for a worse Lego game because the bulk of the story focuses on just Harry and it was harder for the developers to set whatever character the second player would be. Also pretty much all characters had access to the same powers from magic so Lego's previous formula of a wide variety of character powers to keep the player switching characters (and encourage them to grind through collectables to unlock extra characters) didn't really work. The open world is one of the best ones they've done though. Hogwarts is a unique and memorable location in a way that the various large cities in the Marvel / DC games aren't, and while the two versions of Middle Earth have a lot of cool details they've also got some pretty generic forests, grasslands, and mountains.
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Jun 18, 2021 03:12
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CainFortea posted:Too bad it's too late to submit stories for the IK challenge. Speaking of I'm gonna get off my rear end and present what we got to the team, I swear.
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Jun 18, 2021 03:36
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Never forget that one of the JK twitter lore specials is that the house elves gently caress, but only with the consent of their beloved benevolent masters. 
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Jun 18, 2021 06:44
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Brofessor Slayton posted:To be fair the snake also has breasts. That's canon, for some reason.
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Jun 18, 2021 06:52
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Also, some wizards gently caress their house elves. Because JKR has really hosed up views on rape.
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Jun 18, 2021 07:58
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Tulip posted:do wands have more agency/rights than elves? wands gently caress without asking their owners
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Jun 18, 2021 08:03
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thinking about how the cave climax of book six is full of bizarre specific details because it's setting up the Regulus/Kreacher version of the same scene midway though deathly hallows. the whole thing is teeing up a nothing reveal in the middle of a book about something else entirely. infuriating. why wouldn't you put the kreacher scene in book six?! you could put the cave scenes next to each other!
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Jun 18, 2021 10:16
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josh04 posted:thinking about how the cave climax of book six is full of bizarre specific details because it's setting up the Regulus/Kreacher version of the same scene midway though deathly hallows. the whole thing is teeing up a nothing reveal in the middle of a book about something else entirely. infuriating. why wouldn't you put the kreacher scene in book six?! you could put the cave scenes next to each other! trying to stir up fan speculation about who "RAB" is so that people would stay interested during the wait between books. while there were warning signs before book 6, that was the book where it became readily apparent that "jk rowling the author" had been fully subsumed by "jk rowling the Brand" imo. the RAB thing is the most egregious for how little payoff there really is, but there's also "snape: is he a bad guy??" and, of course, the mania of "snape kills dumbledore" which could hardly have been anything but intentional. lots of cliffhangers and stunning "twists" to cover up book 6 being low-effort trash so that everyone would still buy book 7, which was of course even worse. props to the folks that worked on the sixth movie because they really spun poo poo into gold by turning such a bad book into the best movie in the series Jazerus fucked around with this message at 10:33 on Jun 18, 2021 |
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Jun 18, 2021 10:30
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Totally forgot about that RAB 'mystery'. How the hell did Regulus get that Horcrux while Dumbledore the most wise Wizard is almost killed? edit: oh right he used Kreacher and Voldy doesn't believe House Elv Magic is powerful enough to bother or something I Love Loosies fucked around with this message at 11:00 on Jun 18, 2021 |
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Jun 18, 2021 10:57
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I Love Loosies posted:Totally forgot about that RAB 'mystery'. How the hell did Regulus get that Horcrux while Dumbledore the most wise Wizard is almost killed? Because Voldemort showed Kreacher where it was to test out all of the cave's defenses and then left Kreacher to die. Kreacher escaped with House Elf magic Voldemort doesn't know about and told Regulus about all this. Regulus drank the potion and died to the zombies while Kreacher escaped with the locket horcrux. Doesn't seem like any amount of wizard skill would matter when drinking the poison potion. edit: Yeah, you got it
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Jun 18, 2021 11:02
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To be specific - at one point in the books Voldemort mentions that Nagini the snake is milked for her venom as part of the potion to sustain his baby body (because that's before he's fully revived). Milking a snake means extracting its venom - letting it bite something and draining it for use later. However, one of the artists for an edition of the 4th book (?) misunderstood this as, well, actual milking. So there's some official art of baby Voldemort breastfeeding from a snake. Unrelated, the same snake later turns out (in Fantastic Beasts 2) to have been a human woman cursed into the form of a snake.
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Jun 18, 2021 11:08
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it's a setup with lots of weighty themes, it's just they're all deferred to some forgotten chunk of the hallows book. voldemort builds a trap where you can only get the locket by sacrificing an inferior being, because you can't teleport and the magic water makes you so thirsty that you drink from the zombie lake. to test this set-up, voldemort 'borrows' kreacher from regulus and runs him through the whole system: only one proper wizard can get in the boat, but creatures (and idiot children) don't count. you take your creature (or child) to the basin, have them drink the magic water, then leave them to die and escape with your locket. voldemort replaces the locket, leaves kreacher to die, considers it job done. kreacher escapes because elf-teleport is different to wizard-teleport and voldemort doesn't know this. he goes back to regulus, says "wow that rear end in a top hat tried to kill me", regulus turns against voldemort because he never thought the kill-all-inferiors party would try to kill his inferiors. he goes back with kreacher to the lake, but this time he drinks the potion so kreacher doesn't have to and swaps the locket with a fake. he then immediately falls into the zombie trap, and with his dying breath asks kreacher to destroy the locker. kreacher doesn't because he can't work out how. years later, dumbledore brings almost-adult wizard harry potter along with him to the cave and explains at length how the boat spell works. they cross the lake, dumbledore respects harry like a house elf and so drinks the potion in his place, falls into the zombie trap, but doesn't die because he's too badass. so in total, there's this whole thing going on about perceived inferiors and superiors. voldemort wants anyone who claims the locket to have to do a murder, but anyone with a shred of decency takes the self-sacrifice option whether they're dumbledore or actually a death eater. harry escaped being killed by voldemort using old secret love magic but technically kreacher did it first using old secret elf magic. unfortunately you get none of this in the book where it happens. also it's weird that dumbledore brings harry along when in the end he basically solos the whole encounter. maybe at some point a slightly more grey-area dumbledore was going to ask harry to drink the magic water? why does dumbledore risk dying here when it's apparently crucial that he ends up dying back at the castle? was he expecting to die here?
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Jun 18, 2021 11:13
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josh04 posted:voldemort builds a trap where you can only get the locket by sacrificing an inferior being This honestly never occured to me and would be so good thematically if I thought it was intentional. Like basically everyone else I assumed he was just an idiot who didn't think about the possibility of a second person being on the boat - with the trap being "only one person can go to the island, and if they're not Voldemort they'll be driven insane by the potion and die" with him just overlooking that elves and children are also allowed because being a murderous idiot tracks with the character as presented. The actual trap being intentionally built as "only one Real Wizard™ and a living sacrifice to remove the potion can go to the island, and one of them must be killed afterwards to stop them disturbing the Zombie Water™" could give so much more characterisation to Voldy than we ever got. The diary and locket both corrupt people into being more like him, but it seems less of an overt theme and more just an accident because he's really not the subtle and corrupting type of villain. A better series could play on Harry having to battle the creeping corruption of a school literally built on a secret racist chamber, a government that just kept rolling with fascism-lite even after Voldemort died the first time and a dark lord who can only be truly destroyed by becoming more and more like him. Instead Harry wins by rules-lawyering exposition we're not truly party to, upholds the absolutely rotten-to-the-core status quo, and gets his slave to make a sandwich for him to celebrate the victory of centrism.
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Jun 18, 2021 11:46
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well it's weird, because the subsequent explanation about kreacher and voldemort and regulus suggest that that's completely the point of the trap, but at the end of book six dumbledore exposits this bizarre explanation about voldemort not wanting to kill someone who found the locket, just hurt them lots(???) so he could find them later(???) and interrogate them to find out how they knew about the cave(???) but that's so completely stupid i'm unsure what we're meant to take away from it about dumbledore's motivation here.
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Jun 18, 2021 12:08
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Harry Potter: that's so completely stupid i'm unsure what we're meant to take away
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Jun 18, 2021 12:12
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The epilogue and cursed child are dumb for a lot of reasons but Harry just being utterly chill with slytherin is the main one. Harry, my dude, remember when you had to swordfight a nazi snake while Hitler was possessing your wife? Hermione is literally minister of magic. She was a victim of the racially motivated school shooter snake. What the gently caress Hermione? "Snape would have been less of an rear end in a top hat if he wasn't sorted into slytherin" is a played out observation but like... correct. You took the dude from a poor and abusive household, who even the good guys acknowledge as "half blood." And put him in the nazi club where all the kids care about racial purity and money. Maybe slytherin is just bad.
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Jun 18, 2021 12:43
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Harry Potter would have been a much better series if someone else wrote it.
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Jun 18, 2021 14:42
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HIJK posted:Harry Potter would have been a much better series if someone else wrote it. the problem is that harry potter, in all its glory, could not have been written by anyone else *thunder clap*
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Jun 18, 2021 15:26
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josh04 posted:unfortunately you get none of this in the book where it happens. also it's weird that dumbledore brings harry along when in the end he basically solos the whole encounter. maybe at some point a slightly more grey-area dumbledore was going to ask harry to drink the magic water? why does dumbledore risk dying here when it's apparently crucial that he ends up dying back at the castle? was he expecting to die here? At a minimum he needed Harry to keep forcing him to drink. Part of why the trap is impossible to solo even if you're a self-sacrificing super wizard is that whatever liquid Voldy filled the basin with completely fucks you up and actively makes you not want to drink it, so somebody else has to be there to force feed you. It's a shame none of the other hocruxes actually had as elaborate or thematically appropriate traps. Like FFS Voldy spent god knows how much time designing and testing his cliff-side gauntlet to protect the locket, but he protects the Diadem by... chucking it into the room of requirement and hoping nobody notices it. Also protects his diary by giving it to Lucius I guess, without telling him anything but "yo check out my super powerful dark magic journal!"
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Jun 18, 2021 17:23
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It's pretty hilarious that Lucius' immediate reaction is to use the evil snake diary to own his work rival's child daughter though
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Jun 18, 2021 18:04
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:It's pretty hilarious that Lucius' immediate reaction is to use the evil snake diary to own his work rival's child daughter though Does Lucius even work for the Ministry? I always assumed he was just idle rich old money with no day job who has nothing better to do with his time than make life difficult for people who aren't nazis.
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Jun 18, 2021 18:07
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W.T. Fits posted:Does Lucius even work for the Ministry? I always assumed he was just idle rich old money with no day job who has nothing better to do with his time than make life difficult for people who aren't nazis. I think he was on the school board
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Jun 18, 2021 18:24
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W.T. Fits posted:Does Lucius even work for the Ministry? I always assumed he was just idle rich old money with no day job who has nothing better to do with his time than make life difficult for people who aren't nazis. He's pissed at Arthur specifically because they're in a bitter fight about a new anti-muggle harassment law which included some provision he thought was going to be a pretext to raid his manor for a bunch of poo poo. His genius plan is to undermine this by having wizard Hitler possess Arthur's child to kill muggleborns which will wholly defang it or something.
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Jun 18, 2021 18:57
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Zore posted:He's pissed at Arthur specifically because they're in a bitter fight about a new anti-muggle harassment law which included some provision he thought was going to be a pretext to raid his manor for a bunch of poo poo. His genius plan is to undermine this by having wizard Hitler possess Arthur's child to kill muggleborns which will wholly defang it or something. TBF it would make Arthur's position more tenuous if he's in charge of confiscating dangerous magical artifacts while his daughter is herself playing around with an incredibly dangerous magical artifact. The fact that it mind-controlled her into a (attempted) killing spree was an unintended bonus.
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Jun 18, 2021 20:19
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IIRC Lucius knew that the diary opened the Chamber of Secrets but he didn't know how or why, or what the diary ultimately turned out to be (granted at the time she was writing CoS I doubt Jo did either). He was definitely hoping Ginny would be found responsible for opening the Chamber and killing muggle-borns which would discredit Arthur's push for pro-muggle reforms at the Ministry. W.T. Fits posted:Does Lucius even work for the Ministry? I always assumed he was just idle rich old money with no day job who has nothing better to do with his time than make life difficult for people who aren't nazis. He's basically a lobbyist who gets to hang around with all the top politicians and influence their policy decisions because he throws gobs of money at them. The only official position we ever hear he has is part of the Hogwarts PTA, which comes up in books 2 and 3 and then is promptly never relevant ever again.
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Jun 18, 2021 21:45
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exactly- Voldemort wasn't about to tell his most loyal followers he was splitting his soul. Plus, when one found out he immediately started to try to hurt Voldemort and ended up dead. In any case, the diary was meant as a weapon. I'm not sure why the locket wasn't. He might have hid the cup in the potion for the irony of it all. I can imagine Kreacher's tale coming in book 6 in a number of ways that would work and pay off but that might mean there isn't a big mystery. It's not as convoluted as Kingdom Hearts but sometimes its as bad. Also, Lucius is basically a typical inheritor of wealth. He bribes. He receives bribes. He is on various boards and committees. He collects on investments. He gets special treatment. He acts smug.
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Jun 19, 2021 02:16
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The locket is a weapon if your target is a teenager you want to call a sad incel.
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Jun 19, 2021 14:48
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Nagini - Is a giant snake (well, snake lady) that can and will loving kill you unless you're a bad enough dude like Neville. Book - fucks with the mind of the person who has it, possesses them, and ultimately drains their life force to resurrect a seemingly frozen in time version of Tom. Ring - Mega curses you if you try to put it on, even Dumbledore gets permanently crippled and is implied to be dying as a result of it. Locket - Makes your negative emotions go out of control and can also summon a shade of your deepest fears and desires to tell you that you suck. Cup - Uh... well it multiplies a bunch if you try to take it out of the vault. That's neat right? Diadem - Nothing we ever saw, maybe it curses the gently caress out of you if you try to wear it or something. Voldy kinda flubbed the last two ngl. Also I like how it's a whole plot point that Regalus was able to get the locket because Voldemort pays no attention to non-wizard magic, but then defended the cup almost entirely by way of trusting Gringots' goblin magic.
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Jun 19, 2021 19:07
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Sydin posted:Nagini - Is a giant snake (well, snake lady) that can and will loving kill you unless you're a bad enough dude like Neville. He left the Cup's defenses/safekeeping to Bellatrix so presumably it was her idea to put it there. When he learns it's gone he freaks out and is basically like "yeah, I was right all along. I trusted Lucius and Bellatrix and look where it got me. Don't trust anyone."
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Jun 19, 2021 19:13
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While he's not wrong that he absolutely should not have trusted them with his soul fragments, I honestly can't fault him considering that Dumbledore's squad is an absolute clown show.
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Jun 19, 2021 23:31
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Zore posted:He's pissed at Arthur specifically because they're in a bitter fight about a new anti-muggle harassment law which included some provision he thought was going to be a pretext to raid his manor for a bunch of poo poo. His genius plan is to undermine this by having wizard Hitler possess Arthur's child to kill muggleborns which will wholly defang it or something. What's funny about this is that only a couple years later, Arthur's own sons endangered a muggle's life by giving him enchanted candy that made his tongue massive and almost choked him. The only reason that scandal never came out is that Arthur covered it up by setting Dudley's tongue back to normal before the authorities got alerted. Asterite34 posted:TBF it would make Arthur's position more tenuous if he's in charge of confiscating dangerous magical artifacts while his daughter is herself playing around with an incredibly dangerous magical artifact. The fact that it mind-controlled her into a (attempted) killing spree was an unintended bonus. Wasn't it a thing where Arthur's newly-proposed law (almost?) suffered a setback or something because it got out he owned a flying car from that time Ron and Harry hijacked it? Even Ron himself admits that if Arthur had raided his own shed, he would've had to arrest himself. Although maybe I'm just conflating the laws Arthur had passed together. There was that law that Arthur made so he could enchant muggle devices in his own shed, and some other law that gives him a pretext to raid Lucius's manor.
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Jun 20, 2021 02:04
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Iirc Arthur wrote himself some loophole to let him gently caress around with muggle things, he mentions it when Molly is is yelling at him for it
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Jun 20, 2021 06:41
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chaleski posted:Iirc Arthur wrote himself some loophole to let him gently caress around with muggle things, he mentions it when Molly is is yelling at him for it Yeah, basically it boiled down to instead of enchanting the whole car to fly, he took it apart and enchanted different parts of it to do different things before putting it back together, and after that, the fact that it could fly was legally irrelevant since he didn't intend for it to fly when he put all those other enchantments on the parts, or something to that effect.
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Jun 20, 2021 06:58
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W.T. Fits posted:Yeah, basically it boiled down to instead of enchanting the whole car to fly, he took it apart and enchanted different parts of it to do different things before putting it back together, and after that, the fact that it could fly was legally irrelevant since he didn't intend for it to fly when he put all those other enchantments on the parts, or something to that effect. Probably just as well, since it not only started flying, it ended up sentient.
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Jun 20, 2021 09:13
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Arthur kinda rules. Like it's hilarious in book seven when they do the Voldemort flying chase escape and Hagrid goes "don't worry, me and Arthur Weasley did some mods to this bike." Yeah, Hagrid and Arthur Weasley, the man who can't do his one job of understanding what the gently caress a screwdriver is for. What a badass duo. Except then you remember he did blunder his way into the flying sentient car. Also the bike is Sirius' originally so the implication of it is enormous Hagrid on a normal-size bike. Sadly the movies let us down and gave him a Hagrid-sized bike. Hagrid being the bike guy is interesting. We get a bunch of lore about him loving animals, does he also hang out with Arthur and Sirius and rave about Harleys in their down time? I sure hope so. Edgar Allen Ho fucked around with this message at 16:39 on Jun 20, 2021 |
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Jun 20, 2021 16:35
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Hagrid being the bike guy is interesting. We get a bunch of lore about him loving animals, does he also hang out with Arthur and Sirius and rave about Harleys in their down time? I sure hope so. I suspect it's less "animals" specifically, so much as "loud, stupid, violently dangerous things" in particular. Motorcycles fit right into that wheelhouse. I bet he likes chainsaws too.
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Jun 20, 2021 17:50
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I thought Hagrid's deal was not actually seeing them as dangerous because he's big and invulnerable. Maybe Sirius would hang out with him because he's a bad boy who would like Hagrid's danger, but it was his motorcycle that he gave to Hagrid when he ran off to kill Scabbers.
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Jun 20, 2021 18:01
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