Based Wage Making: Money Sitting as a Service

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Based Wage Making: Money Sitting as a Service

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GoGoGadgetChris: Mar 18, 2010; i powder a
granite monument
in a soundless flash

showering the grass
with molten drops of
its gold inlay

sending smoking
chips of stone
skipping into the fog

$800 set of winter tires and your GS 300 is better on snow than a Subaru Outback or the mightiest of pick-em-up trucks

It cannot be overstated just how much the Tires influence your performance.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:21

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 00:13

Kefit: May 16, 2006; layl

I was just listening to a podcast that contained an ad for an incredibly BWM sounding service called Hometap. They pitch themselves as an alternative to a home equity loan, but without any debt or monthly payments!

The way it seems to work is that Hometap pays a lump sum to the homeowner, of an amount that is lower than the equity of the home. While the details of this transaction are not clear to me, the Hometap site couches it as an "investment." But there's a big catch: in ten years, the homeowner needs to either buy out the Hometap "investment," or sell the house. I assume that the buy out amount increases by the same percentage as the overall home value over those ten years, because nothing else would make sense.

That's a pretty big sum of money the homeowner suddenly needs to pay back all at once. But that's ten years away, why worry about it now?

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:29

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

I used to own a 1990 Lexus GS 300 that got stuck twice and on roads up in the mountains near LA without cell service and had to wait for people to drive by to help me push it onto less soft part of the road so no many cars do not handle mountain roads all that well.

This was a tire problem, not a car capability problem.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:31

Residency Evil: Jul 28, 2003; 4/5 godo... Schumi

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

$800 set of winter tires and your GS 300 is better on snow than a Subaru Outback or the mightiest of pick-em-up trucks

It cannot be overstated just how much the Tires influence your performance.

"If this had winter tires we'd be fine!!!!!!"

-Me to myself, this past February, when we were stuck going up the front range from the Denver Airport to the ski resorts at 10pm, in a rental Camry, after I refused to spend the extra money on the 4WD rental, along with a bunch of cars, waiting for the plows to get us unstuck.

Made it. :smug:

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:33

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Kefit posted:

I was just listening to a podcast that contained an ad for an incredibly BWM sounding service called Hometap. They pitch themselves as an alternative to a home equity loan, but without any debt or monthly payments!

The way it seems to work is that Hometap pays a lump sum to the homeowner, of an amount that is lower than the equity of the home. While the details of this transaction are not clear to me, the Hometap site couches it as an "investment." But there's a big catch: in ten years, the homeowner needs to either buy out the Hometap "investment," or sell the house. I assume that the buy out amount increases by the same percentage as the overall home value over those ten years, because nothing else would make sense.

That's a pretty big sum of money the homeowner suddenly needs to pay back all at once. But that's ten years away, why worry about it now?

Sounds like a variant on the Reverse Mortgage.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:35

Guinness: Sep 15, 2004

Motronic posted:

Also agreed, but how many people need to do this on any kind of consistent basis? Those are the same kinds of people who have, and should have, an appropriate vehicle. If this happens twice a year when you take the long way to Tahoe it's a bullshit excuse to.......buy a Tahoe.

Agreed, but at least here in the PNW it's not unusual at all to have to drive up several miles of dilapidated forest roads just for day hikes and such. A pretty common activity around here.

But again, you don't need a "real" 4x4 or anything like that to tackle them, but even just a CUV with 7-8 inches of clearance and some tire/suspension compliance makes you way more confident and comfortable on them. You know, how sedans used to be 30 years ago. What remains of modern sedans tend to have like 5 inches of ground clearance. Even a Prius is a relative low rider at 5.1" of GC. You can do it, but it sucks.

Hence why Subarus are every other car on the road here.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:36

Leon Trotsky 2012: Aug 27, 2009; YOU CAN TRUST ME!*

_{*Israeli Government-affiliated poster}

One of my coworkers told me that they were stressed out because they just bought their "Dream Car" and had to take it back to the dealership after only 2 months because it was making a loud screech that they couldn't identify.

The car was a Subaru Ascent that somehow cost almost as much as a mid-level Tesla.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:40

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

One of my coworkers told me that they were stressed out because they just bought their "Dream Car" and had to take it back to the dealership after only 2 months because it was making a loud screech that they couldn't identify.

The car was a Subaru Ascent that somehow cost almost as much as a mid-level Tesla.

Subaru's knock off version of a land cruiser 200 is quite an interesting choice for a "dream car".

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:45

StormDrain: May 22, 2003; Thirteen Letter

Residency Evil posted:

"If this had winter tires we'd be fine!!!!!!"

-Me to myself, this past February, when we were stuck going up the front range from the Denver Airport to the ski resorts at 10pm, in a rental Camry, after I refused to spend the extra money on the 4WD rental, along with a bunch of cars, waiting for the plows to get us unstuck.

Made it.

You would have just paid more to be in a 4wd vehicle with poo poo tires tho. Better, but not ideal.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:46

Vice President: Jul 4, 2007; I'm number two around here.

Motronic posted:

Subaru's knock off version of a land cruiser 200 is quite an interesting choice for a "dream car".

the cult of Subaru hooks people harder than scientology. Your only escape is a Porsche Cayenne.

# ? Jul 20, 2021 23:59

Residency Evil: Jul 28, 2003; 4/5 godo... Schumi

Vice President posted:

the cult of Subaru hooks people harder than scientology. Your only escape is a Porsche Cayenne.

They just can't get enough of the reliability eh? :v:

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:01

DarkHorse: Dec 13, 2006; Vroom vroom, BEEP BEEP!; Nap Ghost

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

$800 set of winter tires and your GS 300 is better on snow than a Subaru Outback or the mightiest of pick-em-up trucks

It cannot be overstated just how much the Tires influence your performance.

A literal ton or two of glass plastic and metal has about 25 square inches of contact with the road. That total area about the size of a 4"x6" photo has to stop that mass from 65 mph to nothing in about five seconds. It's also resisting all the lateral forces any time you turn.

Each tire's entire connection to the earth is about the size of an Airhead or a candy bar

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:13

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

Vice President posted:

the cult of Subaru hooks people harder than scientology. Your only escape is a Porsche Cayenne.

I own all three of these things (although the Suby is an Impreza) so I'm not sure what that makes me.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:16

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

Which company does the insane 'i want to be a doctor' woman work for so I can make sure we never buy software from them?

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:17

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Motronic posted:

Seriously......even on regular rear end tires.

Car companies have really done a number on the general public making them think that you need super offroad package 4x4 trucks to drive up a fire/logging trail.

3/4 of what you need for anything more difficult is the right tires. Not a different car.

Next you'll be telling us you don't need an SUV/pickup with 4WD to handle winter driving in (non-mountainous) suburbia, and also that your 4WD won't save you if you don't know how to drive on snow/ice.

Kefit posted:

I was just listening to a podcast that contained an ad for an incredibly BWM sounding service called Hometap. They pitch themselves as an alternative to a home equity loan, but without any debt or monthly payments!

The way it seems to work is that Hometap pays a lump sum to the homeowner, of an amount that is lower than the equity of the home. While the details of this transaction are not clear to me, the Hometap site couches it as an "investment." But there's a big catch: in ten years, the homeowner needs to either buy out the Hometap "investment," or sell the house. I assume that the buy out amount increases by the same percentage as the overall home value over those ten years, because nothing else would make sense.

That's a pretty big sum of money the homeowner suddenly needs to pay back all at once. But that's ten years away, why worry about it now?

I misread that as "hometrap" and that seemed more accurate.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:25

CAT INTERCEPTOR: Nov 9, 2004; Basically a male Margaret Thatcher

Vice President posted:

the cult of Subaru hooks people harder than scientology.

No it doesnt. That's not true at all. I can stop anytime I want

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:38

Maggie Fletcher: Jul 19, 2009; Getting brunch is more important to me than other peoples lives.

CAT INTERCEPTOR posted:

No it doesnt. That's not true at all. I can stop anytime I want

I'm a dirty bi and my wife is lesbian so we don't have any other choice. Otherwise, we would totally have something else.

I swear.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 00:49

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

Haifisch posted:

Next you'll be telling us you don't need an SUV/pickup with 4WD to handle winter driving in (non-mountainous) suburbia, and also that your 4WD won't save you if you don't know how to drive on snow/ice.

I'm also going to tell you that you've always had brakes on all 4 wheels so your 4x4 won't stop any better.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 01:11

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

From a deleted reddit thread

quote:

I am considering buying a house with 4 of my friends (2 guys, 2 girls). One of the girls had previously confessed her feelings to me (but I didn�t feel the same way � we�re friends now). Could this potentially affect any of my future (romantic) relationships?

Lots to unpack here:

I�m in a friend group with 4 other people � we all work together, we�ve known each other for around a year now, we�re all 25. Around 6 months ago, one of them confessed her (romantic) feelings to me, but I didn�t (and still don�t) feel the same way. But, after talking about it more, we agreed that being friends was ideal for us.

All 5 of us are considering buying a house together, we�re actively looking at houses. I�ve talked about this with my family, and they told me that this was, overall, a horrible idea, in terms of finances and relationships (the financial side of things, can be a separate conversation). They had told me, �This is an awful idea. You need to realize that she still harbors those feelings about you. If you get into a romantic relationship with someone in the future, and you bring up, �Yeah, I own property with 4 other people, one of whom had previously confessed her romantic feelings to me, but we�re all good now as friends,� she�ll drop you immediately.�

So, because my family is biased, I wanted to bring it to y�all to see what your thoughts were? The way I see it now, we�re friends, so I don�t see what the big deal is. Is there something I�m missing?

Thanks.

tl;dr considering buying a house with 4 of my friends, one of whom confessed her romantic feelings to me; even though I didn�t feel the same way, we�re good friends now. Could living with her, potentially affect any future romantic relationships I have?

# ? Jul 21, 2021 02:12

SlapActionJackson: Jul 27, 2006

DarkHorse posted:

A literal ton or two of glass plastic and metal has about 25 square inches of contact with the road. That total area about the size of a 4"x6" photo has to stop that mass from 65 mph to nothing in about five seconds. It's also resisting all the lateral forces any time you turn.

Each tire's entire connection to the earth is about the size of an Airhead or a candy bar

I think you're underestimating contact patch size. 3500 lbs / 35 psi = 100 sq in

# ? Jul 21, 2021 02:28

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

Kefit posted:

I was just listening to a podcast that contained an ad for an incredibly BWM sounding service called Hometap. They pitch themselves as an alternative to a home equity loan, but without any debt or monthly payments!

The way it seems to work is that Hometap pays a lump sum to the homeowner, of an amount that is lower than the equity of the home. While the details of this transaction are not clear to me, the Hometap site couches it as an "investment." But there's a big catch: in ten years, the homeowner needs to either buy out the Hometap "investment," or sell the house. I assume that the buy out amount increases by the same percentage as the overall home value over those ten years, because nothing else would make sense.

That's a pretty big sum of money the homeowner suddenly needs to pay back all at once. But that's ten years away, why worry about it now?

I got a letter today with the same poo poo from a bunch called Unison, except they'll float it for 30 years lol. They probably expect to clean up at estate settlements.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 02:30

Space Kablooey: May 6, 2009

nvm

Space Kablooey fucked around with this message at 03:24 on Jul 21, 2021

# ? Jul 21, 2021 02:51

Switchback: Jul 23, 2001

Hotel Kpro posted:

From a deleted reddit thread

Lol �future girlfriends will get scared off by your friend�s romantic feelings� is by far one of the smallest problems he will encounter in this situation.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 06:50

KYOON GRIFFEY JR: Apr 12, 2010; Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

Switchback posted:

Lol �future girlfriends will get scared off by your friend�s romantic feelings� is by far one of the smallest problems he will encounter in this situation.

however it is the one that the OP has a slight chance of listening to so it's not a bad strategy

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

"Dream Car"

Subaru Ascent

lmao get better dreams

# ? Jul 21, 2021 13:07

Heffer: May 1, 2003

SlapActionJackson posted:

I think you're underestimating contact patch size. 3500 lbs / 35 psi = 100 sq in

4x6=24 sq inches per tire
4 tires=96 sq inches

Interesting in the pounds/psi math. I hadn't thought of that before.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 13:08

Dik Hz: Feb 22, 2004; Fun with Science

Switchback posted:

Lol �future girlfriends will get scared off by your friend�s romantic feelings� is by far one of the smallest problems he will encounter in this situation.

Rational reasons are for rational people.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 13:12

DaveSauce: Feb 15, 2004; Oh, how awkward.

Vice President posted:

the cult of Subaru hooks people harder than scientology. Your only escape is a Porsche Cayenne.

The big SUV market is strong and Subaru wants in. More accurately, Subaru customers want a big SUV, so it's a no-brainer. The Tribeca was a flop, so they came up with the Ascent.

And then they forgot to weld the frames together lmao

# ? Jul 21, 2021 13:12

Bird in a Blender: Nov 17, 2005; It's amazing what they can do with computers these days.

Not sure I want to meet the person whose dream car is just a normal rear end looking SUV.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 13:56

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Friends. But they all own the condo and it lasts as long as Joey

# ? Jul 21, 2021 14:13

IOwnCalculus: Apr 2, 2003

Bird in a Blender posted:

Not sure I want to meet the person whose dream car is just a normal rear end looking SUV.

Somewhere, someone's dream car is a Chrysler Sebring.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 16:16

TraderStav: May 19, 2006; It feels like I was standing my entire life and I just sat down

IOwnCalculus posted:

Somewhere, someone's dream car is a Chrysler Sebring.

Michael Scott. He also has a very impressive 17" flat screen tv.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 16:46

CannonFodder: Jan 26, 2001; Passion’s Wrench

IOwnCalculus posted:

Somewhere, someone's dream car is a Chrysler Sebring.

I can see you
Your brown skin shinin' in the sun
You got that top pulled down and that radio on, baby
And I can tell you my love for you will still be strong
After the Chrysler Sebring is gone.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 17:01

Krispy Wafer: Jul 26, 2002; I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat; Grimey Drawer

I swear there was a Reddit link here once where someone's dream car was the most boring thing ever and for the life of me I can't recall what it was. It was just that forgettable.

Had to be a Honda CR V or Toyota RAV4, the two most boring cars ever made. At least a Chrysler will break down so you can meet new and exciting people on roadside shoulders or parking lots where ever you go.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 17:11

Nocheez: Sep 5, 2000; Can you spare a little cheddar?; Nap Ghost

I started a job, and in our intro class one woman's thing she chose to tell everyone she was proud of was her "sporty Pontiac Sunfire" which is more commonly known as a loving Chevy Cavalier.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 17:38

canyoneer: Sep 13, 2005; I only have canyoneyes for you

Krispy Wafer posted:

I swear there was a Reddit link here once where someone's dream car was the most boring thing ever and for the life of me I can't recall what it was. It was just that forgettable.

Had to be a Honda CR V or Toyota RAV4, the two most boring cars ever made. At least a Chrysler will break down so you can meet new and exciting people on roadside shoulders or parking lots where ever you go.

That was probably me, from my real life.

My neighbor's dream car was a Mercury Mountaineer

# ? Jul 21, 2021 17:48

Verus: Jun 3, 2011; AUT INVENIAM VIAM AUT FACIAM

Speaking of dream cars, did anyone ever post this classic from StackExchange?

quote:

I want a brand new car that's $43,668 at 17-18 years old

I'm Kyle from Arizona. I'm looking to get a brand new Jeep Wrangler Rubicon that's around 43,000 at 17 years old. I turn 18 in 4 months. I work at one job where I usually make around 1200 a month. Right now I have 600$ in my bank account and I'm not planning to spend any more money at all until I turn 18. The down payment is 10% so around $5,000. The APR of the place near me that sells them is 4.28%. The duration is 60 months and it's around $800 a month.

I'm 17 so I don't have any credit at all. My friend told me to ask my parents to put my name on a credit card to add to their account so I can gain credit when they use their cards? Not too sure how that works. Can someone tell me a good way of going about this so I can try to get that car on or around my birthday?

My mom does a lot of finance stuff for a big company and all she has told me is that I should get a cheaper car, but I desperately need this one and I'm willing to work for it. I'm getting a second job to get more money rolling in. My mom said the only way it would work is if I did a downpayment of 20 or 15k. Also, she said not everyone can qualify for a car like that. What can get me to qualify asap as soon as I turn 18?

# ? Jul 21, 2021 17:52

BaseballPCHiker: Jan 16, 2006

I once worked with a kid who was helpdesk at my government job, making good money and benefits for a 24 year old.

He was a "car guy". He already sunk a ton of money into a nice, but purchased used and well maintained BMW. At some point he decided he was only young once and that he needed to get his dream car while he was still living at home and not paying rent. He went out and bought a brand new Porsche 718 Cayman. I think the thing cost him an easy $120k.

On a roughly $65k a year salary....

He only managed to keep the car for 2 years. He told us he actually made money on the deal when he sold it, but all of us at work had our doubts and never found out the real answer.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 18:06

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

That's not a special car, so there's no way he made money on something he bought new and sold 2 years later. Yes, it's a fun and expensive car, but it's just a regular rear end production model that he was presumably actually putting miles on.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 18:16

Krispy Wafer: Jul 26, 2002; I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat; Grimey Drawer

canyoneer posted:

That was probably me, from my real life.

My neighbor's dream car was a Mercury Mountaineer

Okay, yes. That was you. Now I remember. A Ford Explorer for $5k extra. Sign me up. Dreams finally realized.

Their current dream car is probably a Bronco Sport.

# ? Jul 21, 2021 18:25

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 00:13

Not a Children: Oct 9, 2012; Don't need a holster if you never stop shooting.

BaseballPCHiker posted:

He only managed to keep the car for 2 years. He told us he actually made money on the deal when he sold it, but all of us at work had our doubts and never found out the real answer.

He was most definitely omitting any maintenance costs

# ? Jul 21, 2021 18:28

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Based Wage Making: Money Sitting as a Service

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