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LuckyCat posted:lol how did you approach him on this. Oh hey bud good to see you, here's some fresh socks- ill take the ones you got and contain them in this ziploc bag. wanna play some smash bros? He knew, everyone around him knew once he took his shoes off. We were also in our late 20’s and tended to hang out after work. There was no malice when I bagged his stuff and he made off like a bandit with free socks
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Dec 15, 2022 07:16
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my first big boy job out of college happened and my cat pissed in my nice leather shoes im sorry this happened to you OP
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Dec 15, 2022 07:30
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If you had too many children, you'd starve and thrash them too. The little shits.
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Dec 15, 2022 15:07
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This thread reminds me of the Bob's Burgers where Bob says he doesn't wash and Gene asks, "but do you season?"
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Dec 15, 2022 15:38
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Funky See Funky Do posted:An the original: There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, she didn't know what to do. She gave them some broth without any bread; And whipped them all soundly and put them to bed.  Except if the old-timey rhyme is actually some kinda old-timey dog whistle. "The old lady represents the jews because jews are shoemakers, and the kids are the white people, and broth means blood." Some of them old rhymes are probably about that.
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Dec 15, 2022 17:55
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it's about how the old lady is busting her rear end to rent this shoe and her kids are whining there's no bread, but good damnit I worked for this broth you cretins, enjoy it and go to bed, I don't want any sass about us not being able to afford bread
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Dec 15, 2022 18:14
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Treat 'em mean and keep 'em lean. That's how you raise new shoe-dwellers.
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Dec 15, 2022 18:17
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OP you're house smells like feet, because it literally has athlete's foot now. You have to scrub every corner to be sure it's not contaminated with the foot fungus, that's probably still spreading as I write this. Don't let your house be broken down and consumed by human foot fungus.
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Dec 15, 2022 18:54
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Ringworm sucks but I've successfully used monostat to treat it in guinea pigs good luck OP
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Dec 15, 2022 18:57
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My feet smell like your house!!
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Dec 15, 2022 19:22
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You're not gonna chicken or the egg this buddy
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Dec 15, 2022 20:46
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 HOLY gently caress ITS HAPPENING AGAINI can’t believe this poo poo Details to follow after Christmas dinner wraps 
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Dec 26, 2022 00:51
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Do you still suspect it’s the brother-in-law? Is he present tonight? Is it the same roster of guests?
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Dec 26, 2022 01:15
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:
lol you poor bastard
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Dec 26, 2022 02:39
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Start smelling them toes up close and the shoes will go back on soon enough
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Dec 26, 2022 02:48
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Dec 26, 2022 02:52
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Those who live in a smelly house shouldn't have feet
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Dec 26, 2022 02:53
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this is why I don’t let people or their clothing into my house
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Dec 26, 2022 02:59
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This wouldn't happen if op had an inflatable foot sauna
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Dec 26, 2022 03:07
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Go get some Lysol spray and kill that poo poo or you'll catch the stank.
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Dec 26, 2022 03:17
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I got athletes foot showering at Mike's I got athletes foot showering at Mike's I got athletes foot showering at Mike's Athletes foot at Mike's (x many)
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Dec 26, 2022 03:20
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 Yes, I did just watch The Glass Onion last night, so if you could all read this in Benoit Blanc’s voice I’d appreciate it. Okay so I had some friends and family over for Christmas dinner tonight. We’re all at the table, and about halfway through the meal my nose starts to twinge. The smell has returned. The smelly foot smell. On CHRISTMAS. Almost the same crowd from the first time this happened, so my suspects remained the same. My manchild brother-in-law remained the chief suspect. But I couldn’t prove anything yet. So the offender remained nameless. Nameless, but not clueless. This time, the culprit was careless. The lengths they had gone through to conceal their stench and blend in the first time, fell flat this evening. Perhaps they were lulled into a false sense of security when originally no one screamed at the top of their lungs, “WHO GOT THE STANK FEET!?” But this night their carelessness—their HUBRIS got the better of them and revealed everything to me. It was so simple. The pieces were there the whole time. It merely took a genius mind of deduction to assemble them.   There was only one person who took off their shoes tonight. And it wasn’t my brother-in-law. It was his boyfriend. Let’s call him Paul. This time, I said something to my wife after everyone left. She said she actually couldn’t smell anything, which blew my mind. But then she said it totally makes sense though, because she apparently always thought Paul had BO and smelled. I actually never thought Paul smelled before the foot thing. But my wife said that her brother has actually mentioned to her that Paul’s hygiene was less than stellar. So, mystery solved I guess. Now I somehow have to convince Paul that “no shoes in the house please” isn’t a house rule anymore and he can keep his shoes on, without letting him know it’s because he has smelly feet. Hope Santa got everyone else everything they wanted this year. Bloodfart McCoy fucked around with this message at 04:29 on Dec 26, 2022 |
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Dec 26, 2022 04:16
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4SmyqO5DUU
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Dec 26, 2022 04:19
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Sorry you have to give him a new pair of shoes and bag up the old ones every time he comes over now.
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Dec 26, 2022 04:19
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Watch out, OP, the one time something like this happened to me my cat started peeing on the spot where the offender sat and never really stopped until she died.
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Dec 26, 2022 04:28
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RapturesoftheDeep posted:Watch out, OP, the one time something like this happened to me my cat started peeing on the spot where the offender sat and never really stopped until she died. That's hilarious. Did it help?
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Dec 26, 2022 04:28
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kntfkr posted:That's hilarious. Did it help? Not sure, what you mean, the peeing smelled worse than the sweaty guy smell but her dying definitely put an end to the peeing.
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Dec 26, 2022 04:45
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Dec 26, 2022 04:46
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RapturesoftheDeep posted:Watch out, OP, the one time something like this happened to me my cat started peeing on the spot where the offender sat and never really stopped until she died. Is this for real? More details please 
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Dec 26, 2022 04:50
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Smelling so bad you kill a cat smdh
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Dec 26, 2022 04:51
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Slayerjerman posted:minus well this is hosed up and I hope you find help
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Dec 26, 2022 04:55
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How attached is your BIL to this “Paul”?
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Dec 26, 2022 05:24
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:I didn’t feel like picking up mud later, so when our guests got here I asked them to kick off their shoes when the came in. Wait, so normally you'd just let people track their disgusting shoes around the place?
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Dec 26, 2022 05:28
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BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:How attached is your BIL to this “Paul”? foot stank fetish, it's hopeless really classless make your family participate in your fetishes at Christmas, but enough about my sister
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Dec 26, 2022 06:25
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SilvergunSuperman posted:Wait, so normally you'd just let people track their disgusting shoes around the place? If you let people track their disgusting shoes around the place, well, you just might be American
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Dec 26, 2022 06:39
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:Now I somehow have to convince Paul that “no shoes in the house please” isn’t a house rule anymore and he can keep his shoes on, without letting him know it’s because he has smelly feet. Next christmas, stuff a stocking with his name on it full of these: 
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Dec 26, 2022 15:31
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Colonel Cancer posted:If you let people track their disgusting shoes around the place, well, you just might be American lol i was mightily confused at the thread premise due to this at first poisting. americans walking around their house w shoes on. laying in bed with shoes on too??? what a beautoiful culture
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Dec 26, 2022 16:33
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hot cocoa on the couch posted:lol i was mightily confused at the thread premise due to this at first poisting. americans walking around their house w shoes on. laying in bed with shoes on too??? what a beautoiful culture smelly shoes on the couch
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Dec 26, 2022 17:36
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https://twitter.com/theaaronschmit/status/1607420126403657730?s=61&t=JElmafs_FTUh_RuhrP7GvQ
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Dec 26, 2022 17:57
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Bloodfart McCoy posted:Now I somehow have to convince Paul that “no shoes in the house please” isn’t a house rule anymore and he can keep his shoes on, without letting him know it’s because he has smelly feet. May as well wish for them to break up. Same likelihood of success. Changing your mind about your no-shoes-inside policy because of one person. SMH.
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Jan 5, 2023 17:37
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