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Bloodfart McCoy
Jul 20, 2007

That's a high quality avatar right there.
So my wife and I just had about six people over tonight. Before everyone arrived it started to rain. I didn’t feel like picking up mud later, so when our guests got here I asked them to kick off their shoes when the came in.

Big mistake.

While everyone was here I was smelling nasty foot-smell the whole time. It was STRONG. At first I thought it was my imagination. I left the living room to go back to the kitchen, and when I came back it hit me like a sledgehammer.

Everyone must have smelled it but no one said anything. We just let it happen to us. And whoever was the gross poo poo with the stinky feet could have at least cracked a joke or something. “Sorry guys I stepped in a puddle this morning and my shoes reek!” I would have gotten them some slippers or something.

Like don’t get me wrong… I’ve been the smelly-foot guy once before. Back when I was like 14 years old, in gym class we had to do this thing where we take off our shoes and see how far we could reach forward on this stupid wooden board. As soon as my shoes came off, a bunch of girls started snickering. I guess my feet smelled. Anyway… that was kind of an eye opening moment for me. Started showering and changing my socks more than once a fortnight.

I was 14 years old when that happened. The stinker who stunk up my house tonight must have been in their mid-30’s. Like, motherfucker! gently caress you!

After everyone left I took a shower, and when I came out of the shower THE HOUSE STILL SMELLED OF FEET.

I can smell it now. It’s loving following me. ITS NOT MY loving FEET. Do I need to hire like an HR firm to send memos to our friends reminding them of proper hygiene?

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WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

me on the right
Stinks

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

me on the right
When I was in the klink I thought man do my feet stink

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 22 days!
Mmmmmmm
Can I come over

Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

Bloodfart McCoy posted:

It’s loving following me. ITS NOT MY loving FEET. Do I need to hire like an HR firm to send memos to our friends reminding them of proper hygiene?
You literally just told us you have a history of stinky feet.

EorayMel
May 29, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
OP now is the perfect time to break into the lucrative clown shoe market

Dixville
Nov 4, 2008

Your Best Paw Forward
Ham Wrangler
One time my best friend in middle school came over for a sleep over and we sat down to watch TV with my mom and I can't remember if my mom left the room or put her shirt over her nose but she did something like that. Girl smelled. She also would give me lice all the time. Good friends otherwise but the personal hygiene was lacking.

STABASS
Apr 18, 2009

Fun Shoe
can I come over?

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

ah, a shoes-on household. interesting.

Bloodfart McCoy
Jul 20, 2007

That's a high quality avatar right there.

Slugworth posted:

You literally just told us you have a history of stinky feet.

It’s not me, you testicle.

Bloodfart McCoy fucked around with this message at 01:50 on Nov 28, 2022

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

Bottle the mystery foot air and put it on eBay

Flowers for QAnon
May 20, 2019



When competing with others, a good tactic is to enter the competition with super stinky feet. This can help get you an A in tough classes.

Noblesse Obliged
Apr 7, 2012

You should stop hanging out with pediviles

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

me on the right
Footfungusophilia

1000 Sweaty Rikers
Oct 13, 2005

sprinkle parmesan cheese everywhere to cover up the smell

Private Cumshoe
Feb 15, 2019

AAAAAAAGAGHAAHGGAH
try farting op you might feel better and improve the smell

Slayerjerman
Nov 27, 2005

by sebmojo
Gonna need to mop that floor asap, minus well use some concentrated bleach. Least then your house will smell of bleach.

Saalkin
Jun 29, 2008


Cut yo feet off. Bag em up and put em outside in the trash. If the house doesn't smell anymore it was you ya dirty footed fucker.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011



Gonna need detailed descriptions of all the feet involved in order to get to the bottom of this op.

Bloodfart McCoy
Jul 20, 2007

That's a high quality avatar right there.

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Gonna need detailed descriptions of all the feet involved in order to get to the bottom of this op.

Everyone had big thick socks on… total snoozefest

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


That's why Jesus washed the feet of his guests when they came to dinner OP.

The Saucer Hovers
May 16, 2005

open a window not a thread

Pinche Rudo
Feb 8, 2005

Next time just piss all over the floor so the house smells like piss.

Problem solved

WAR CRIME GIGOLO
Oct 3, 2012

me on the right
Itt we discuss my whole house smelling like farts

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

hot cocoa on the couch posted:

ah, a shoes-on household. interesting.

Shoes on is a valid approach if you rent and have pets.

Just wait until you hear about people with cats that get on the kitchen counter.



Start smoking inside, OP. The foot smell will be gone in 3-5 packs.

prayer group
May 31, 2011

$#$%^&@@*!!!

what the gently caress

The Hello Machine
Jul 18, 2021

I'm not a real machine, but I am a real Hello-sayer.
Simply ask your guests whose feet reek so that you can indicate them toward the bathroom for them to wash up. Or if you'd like to be more discreet, find an excuse to be alone in a room with each of them at a time until you identify the culprit and can indicate them toward the bathroom.

I'm sorry your hospitality was rewarded with bad smells op

Bula Vinaka
Oct 21, 2020

beach side

WAR CRIME GIGOLO posted:

Itt we discuss my whole house smelling like farts

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HtTSPStgNY

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Self Defense
Nil Satanus carborundum

Yeshua akbar!
(Xtian anarchisto, no bombo)

Go buy a spraycan of air freshener already, stinky.

thin blue whine
Feb 20, 2004
PLEASE SEE POLICY


Soiled Meat

Bloodfart McCoy posted:

So my wife and I just had about six people over tonight. Before everyone arrived it started to rain. I didn’t feel like picking up mud later, so when our guests got here I asked them to kick off their shoes when the came in.

Big mistake.

While everyone was here I was smelling nasty foot-smell the whole time. It was STRONG. At first I thought it was my imagination. I left the living room to go back to the kitchen, and when I came back it hit me like a sledgehammer.

Everyone must have smelled it but no one said anything. We just let it happen to us. And whoever was the gross poo poo with the stinky feet could have at least cracked a joke or something. “Sorry guys I stepped in a puddle this morning and my shoes reek!” I would have gotten them some slippers or something.

Like don’t get me wrong… I’ve been the smelly-foot guy once before. Back when I was like 14 years old, in gym class we had to do this thing where we take off our shoes and see how far we could reach forward on this stupid wooden board. As soon as my shoes came off, a bunch of girls started snickering. I guess my feet smelled. Anyway… that was kind of an eye opening moment for me. Started showering and changing my socks more than once a fortnight.

I was 14 years old when that happened. The stinker who stunk up my house tonight must have been in their mid-30’s. Like, motherfucker! gently caress you!

After everyone left I took a shower, and when I came out of the shower THE HOUSE STILL SMELLED OF FEET.

I can smell it now. It’s loving following me. ITS NOT MY loving FEET. Do I need to hire like an HR firm to send memos to our friends reminding them of proper hygiene?

Which of your guests are high on the suspect list? Give us some dirt.

Dixville
Nov 4, 2008

Your Best Paw Forward
Ham Wrangler

prayer group posted:

what the gently caress

Was gonna post this I'm glad I'm not the only one

Wasn't there a thread once about things you thought were saying one thing but it's actually something else? Like "for all intensive purposes" stuff like that. Fascinates me

hamtaro
Oct 7, 2008

Call a young priest and an old priest

DeeplyConcerned
Apr 29, 2008


based on the foot smell description, I could immediately tell something was wrong.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Serve old cheese without missing a beat

ChubbyChecker
Mar 25, 2018


wash your feet op

Jose Oquendo
Jun 20, 2004

Star Trek: The Motion Picture is a boring movie
At least the whole house doesn't smell like cum.

ChubbyChecker
Mar 25, 2018


Jose Oquendo posted:

At least the whole house doesn't smell like cum.

that's one way to do it

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011



Jose Oquendo posted:

At least the whole house doesn't smell like cum.

We don’t know this. We only know that the house currently smells like feet. Perhaps the foot smell is in addition to cumstank, or even strong enough to cover it up. Once again, OP has declined to provide the important details required to solve a mystery of this level.

GABA ghoul
Oct 29, 2011

You're all I think, this thing set troublin
Htbh but this sounds like a viral marketing ARG for limburger cheese. Ban op

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Shishkahuben
Mar 5, 2009




is OP a little old lady perchance

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