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Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


I just got back from the smoke pit and some rear end in a top hat's wearing a toga. Still far and away from the most ridiculous garment I've seen out there though.

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Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


I'm surprised nobody made a post about the Farsi Fapper roughly a year ago today.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


AB posted:

The who in the what now?

Last year someone got pulled from class because he was allegedly caught jerking off during lessons twice. The SSG sitting next to him warned him the first time, and the second time she sent him straight to the MLI for pawing at his groin for way too long. He says he was just scratching it with a pencil and everyone else was just trying to get him out of class, but the dude was my neighbor. It's way too plausible that he was going at himself, and if people are willing to say that he was jerkin' it in class to get him out he was probably an unpleasant little poo poo to start with.

I was also his neighbor and he was probably the least socially functional person I've met here. When he wanted to talk to us instead of coming to our door like a regular person he'd stick his finger through our blinds. Once he was my spotter during a PT eval, and when it was time to hold my legs for situps he brushed his hand against my inner thigh and said, "Oh, I've never touched your legs before!"

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Dirk Digglet posted:

AF goons has the 314th burned to the ground yet?

314 TRS continues to be the broest unit at DLI even after the change of command. We just had an airman leader mutiny a month ago, and plans to move airmen off-post have fallen through entirely when it was apparent that it would be exactly like living in a dorm except significantly less convenient with a requirement to have $1000 in your account at all times. Surprisingly we haven't had any airmen get a DUI for a while, I think the last one was some underage moron 3 months ago. Did not hear about the staff NCO getting one, though that's probably not something they like to broadcast.

And to be fair, Farsi students were dropping like flies well before the new CO. I think my class is up to around 65% attrition now.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Super Camper posted:

Halloween is in full swing here at the PX. you should all be here

I was at study hall instead of out partying. Hopefully my knowledge of Zoorkhaneh comes in handy on the DLPT or I'm going to be pissed.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


AchmedTheSnake posted:

I'm currently 311th and holy poo poo am I glad I didn't get a 314th language. It's way more chill over here(lots more TPG cause you can actually get it without being a rope) and the ropes aren't constantly on your rear end pulling 341s and generally being assholes. I'm managing to pull my grades up ever so slightly with TPG and not having NCO's and horrible ropes on me 24/7. Sucks for 314th. That probably has something to do with why Farsi is doing so terribly.

That's funny, we say the exact same things about you guys.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Godholio posted:

No, this thread got taken over by the worst the AF has to offer (AETC).

Bro we need somewhere to vent, the AETC sucks and we're there for like two years.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Badgers posted:

On the bus from San Fran to Monterey for Farsi. Already approached by sketchy homeless man. California seems OK.

Congratulations, you're about to embark on a very memorable period of your life! What service are you?

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Badgers posted:

AF, are you here as well?

Yeah, I'm just about through with the Farsi course so I'll be in the details office next week. We'll probably see each other at some point.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Super Camper posted:

drat man thats nuts. I hope no ropes were involved in all this.

If only we had implemented the Teal Rope program we could have prevented this.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Tonight my jackass friend flipped off a Marine E-6 who was checking IDs at the patio. Here's hoping we don't feel any blowback for that!

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Professor Bling posted:

lol

Got some bad news for you.

What happened to the AF there since I've left? Y'all are going full retard.

We can't take our backpacks to formation anymore.

Someone got in trouble for having their natural hair color.

The Air Force is the worst branch and DLI is the worst place.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


AB posted:

Story? :frogon:

Nothing terribly exciting, an Airman born in Northern Europe shows up to the mass urinalysis with really light hair on top and slightly darker on the sides, a sergeant thinks he bleached his hair or something and pulls a 341 (lol).

Professor Bling posted:

I'm more interested in the backpack thing.


I have only ideas on this one all of them dumb. 1) They got tired of idiots leaving their backpacks by the sidewalk and having to tell us every goddamn Monday and Friday to move them; unlikely because offpost people still get to leave their crap there. 2) Everyone trampling through that area twice a week and leaving our poo poo there turned the slope into a huge mud pile and some moron slipped and fell and ruined their blues; doubtful but hilarious to imagine. 3) They just planted grass there and want it to grow in; likely based on how much the AF loves appearances over actual functionality.

Most likely reason though is because

vvvvv

Softface fucked around with this message at 20:25 on Jan 7, 2013

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


I give the policy two weeks.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Professor Bling posted:

Speaking of cars, has anyone drawn dicks on my RX-4? I know it's still up there.

Surprisingly it's yet to be defaced or broken into, not even by drunk assholes.

Sensitive Thug posted:

So it looks like I'll be going back to DLI for an Arabic-Iraqi conversion course in a few months. What silly Air Force stuff can I expect coming back to DLI as a non tech schooler?

Lots of 4-day weekends and occasionally having to check IDs for our drunk asses at the PX.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Godholio posted:

I'm just missing a bunch of tools. :mad:

Just go to an airman leader meeting, they're full of 'em! :v:

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


So today during first hour the CMLI walks into my classroom and says, "Hey guys, I got your DLPT date. It's yesterday and nobody told us, you have reading today. Good luck!" Took us a few to figure out it wasn't a joke.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


We were in post-class and apparently that's real spotty with knowing the actual date. Up until now they'd been saying the week of the 28th solidly, maybe after, but the people who administer it hadn't gotten back to them with a concrete answer. Funnily enough as soon as they got the CSM involved they had it within 15 minutes!

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


AF night CQ rules I spend about ten hours painting my tiny pewter men and two more walking around opening doors.

Also I failed the Farsi DLPT twice and couldn't be happier because I was goddamn miserable there. Instead they're putting me in a Russian post-class because I came in with a Bachelor's in that and both I and staff think I can pass it with a bit of a brush up. Honestly I expected to take the test with a minimal review period of a week, tops, and when they said they'd get me a few weeks I expected three. Instead I get seven weeks plus one to test, and a total shock that the AF is helping me out.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


I'm at Fort Ord waiting for class to start and half-expecting my old MLI to jump out from behind a column and yell "Punk'd!"

E: no one knows anything about this and neither of my POCs are answering their phones!

Softface fucked around with this message at 16:15 on Feb 11, 2013

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


After only three weeks of Russian Refresher they threw me into the DLPT after a year and some weeks of Farsi. If I pull this off it'll be among the greatest things I've ever done.

e: Oh hey look at that I passed. 2/2+ time to start rolling in the sweet, sweet bonus pay.

Softface fucked around with this message at 00:18 on Mar 6, 2013

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Mucky Duck is definitely not gone, DLI students still go there to make awful decisions and end up paying more than they expected. I'd highly suggest the aforementioned Cannery Row Brewing Company, and if for some reason you want to experience the weekend life of one of us sad nerds go to the Duck or Duffy's, the latter is just a few steps outside of Taylor Gate. Yes, people call DD from there.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Finally got my orders to leave this place! They're verbal and for this Friday, so long Stinkberg!

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Yeah I kinda want to go back right now. Goodfellow is a sandblasted hellhole and the temperature can change 60 degrees in one day. Plus the AF is loving me so hard I could file a SARC complaint but that's nothing new.

On the plus side you make loving BANK at follow-on training for the Air Force.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


The talk of changing Farsi to Cat 4 was going on before I started class, and I bet it will be "going on" for another decade, unless an official statement has been issued.

In other news of talk, the commander at Goodfellow is looking into whether Air Force DLItes should still get sweet, sweet TDY pay while here. That gravy train may dry up soon, killing the only worthwhile thing about leaving DLI.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Air Force current DLItes, don't even bother getting TPG anymore. The only benefit we have at Goodfellow now is no curfew, and that probably won't last much longer. All you'd have to look forward to is a lovely room and getting poo poo on for your whole time here.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Friar Zucchini posted:

Wait so you've still got morning formation?

Not only that, but we now have to march everywhere in SMU's, form up in the morning, march to class, then after class form back up and march back with everyone else. The only thing we still have is no curfew, but you can't even really take advantage of that because you have to be up for 4 am PT three days a week and the rest of the time you're too tired to do anything.

We do get other things though! For instance, last weekend we got a 1-demerit fail inspection from the commander and flight chief, then had to check in every hour for the rest of the weekend.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Androies posted:

If you feel like something is seriously holding you back bring it up immediately because this is not the kind of place where you ignore it, because you'll fail out and those retards will go on to get 3/3/2s.

Edit: Also, gently caress Farsi and gently caress the Army.

This is incredibly true. My class hosed around for 15 minutes every class while I did the lesson, so I didn't get help as I needed it. All those shuts got 2+s and 3s while I failed.

But now I'm a Russian linguist, gently caress Farsi.

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Androies posted:

gently caress Farsi still

Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


That was LaLa Grill, the Duck had an open air bar area so you could smoke while drinking and the route is really easy to walk.

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Softface
Feb 15, 2011

Some things can't be unseen


Internet Wizard posted:



If you go to the Duck (it's the Bear and the Bull now but nobody calls it that) watch your drink, and don't get picked up by a cougar.

Alternatively do, and come let us know. We had a lot of fun pushing one of our friends onto the old, overweight women dancing for the lovely live bands there.

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