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IMJack posted:I don't drink or dance or swear, I've even kept kosher just to be on the safe side. I've done everything the Bible says! Even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! Looks like bad news for the... Impson family.
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Oct 8, 2013 01:17
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LOCUST FART HELL posted:
We're not affiliated, we're just piggybacking on their message board.
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Oct 8, 2013 01:59
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Hogburto posted:"To overcome the first page curse, simply quote a Bible verse!" Ow my freakin' ears!
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Oct 8, 2013 03:01
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CharlieFoxtrot posted:They should have called this thread Johnny Deformed! They called me Kid Gorgeous. Later on, it was Kid Presentable. Then Kid Gruesome. And finally, Kid Moe.
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Oct 9, 2013 06:26
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Funky See Funky Do posted:What is it with you Goons and that word? I'm going to shave you bald young man, until you learn that quotes are not a right: they're a privilege. I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.
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Oct 10, 2013 08:12
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Dear Lord, look at that blimp! He's hanging from a balloon!
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Oct 10, 2013 08:51
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Hogburto posted:Why don't ya nibble her elbows? That always melts her butter, right? Heh heh. Caramel... waffle batter... liquid smoke... mmm, fattening.
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Oct 10, 2013 19:02
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Hogburto posted:Usually the blood gets off at the second floor. Well here's the thing inspector, the button for 5 doesn't light up.
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Oct 10, 2013 22:47
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Nazi Germany? I thought you guys broke up.
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Oct 11, 2013 00:22
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MondayHotDog posted:Did you ever notice how men always leave the toilet seat up? I hate having parties. The toilet always gets backed up.
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Oct 11, 2013 07:34
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Children! Children! I didn't think he'd do Moon River but bam, second encore!
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Oct 12, 2013 09:18
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Dear Mr. Simpson, I've taken the liberty of preparing your speech on the enclosed numbered 3x5 cards. All the big words are spelled FO-NEH-TIC-ALL-LY. Why would the national grammar rodeo be in Canada?
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Oct 12, 2013 17:29
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One screwball can make a difference. But they probably shouldn't.
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Oct 13, 2013 01:20
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DrBouvenstein posted:The president is a Demy-Crat! I'm the last surviving Democrat. Tax and spend! Tax and spend!
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Oct 13, 2013 02:42
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monsteroftheweek posted:But I fell in love with Catcher Simpson! I don't want to snuggle with Mr. NdRy. Tell me, how do you feel about 45-year-old virgins who still live with their parents?
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Oct 13, 2013 09:28
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Writer Cath posted:We're queer, we're glad, but don't tell Mom and Dad. We're here! We're queer! Get used to it!
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Oct 13, 2013 19:14
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mrfart posted:I heard it at the mustache parade they have every year. Wanna comb it?
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Oct 13, 2013 20:52
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Mister Kingdom posted:Mom, Dad? IMJack's DEAD! Dead tired of baby proofers who don't give a free estimate!
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Oct 13, 2013 22:33
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Sanguinia posted:SO LONG DENTAL PLAN! Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too?
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Oct 14, 2013 04:20
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Cookie Kwan posted:
This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes has cost me the election, and yet if I were to have them killed, I would be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you!
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Oct 14, 2013 08:24
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Well, it's always in the last place you look. Attic? Oh, that's silly. Seriously though don't ever go up there.
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Oct 15, 2013 02:34
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Oh, gee, a joke. Um... Um... Uh, funny, uh, okay. Uh, this guy walks into a bar and takes out a tiny piano and a twelve-inch pianist. Oh hoho, no, wait! I can't tell THAT one! KKK? That's not good... ugh...
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Oct 15, 2013 22:34
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Striking Yak posted:HELLO ST. LOUIS!! That fat, dumb, and bald guy sure plays some real hardball.
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Oct 16, 2013 09:24
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BloodDesk UnderHell posted:So, he has fire in the belly! But it will take more than belly fire to be the next Baryshnikov. Hey, Miss Doesn't-find-me-attractive-sexually-anymore, I just tripled my productivity!
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Oct 16, 2013 20:21
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IMJack posted:As lifelong Tab junkies, this set my entire family off. All this computer hacking is making me thirsty. I think I'll order a Tab. Deviant posted:Think I'll order a 'Tab'. Jinx!
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Oct 16, 2013 20:24
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Deviant posted:I'm seeing double! Four quotes! You spoke while you were jinxed, so I got to punch you in the arm. Sorry! It's the law.
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Oct 16, 2013 20:27
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I'll take the crab juice.
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Oct 17, 2013 00:33
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My bones are so brittle! But I always drink plenty of.... malk?
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Oct 17, 2013 08:42
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Bjay9 posted:And you remember Matthew... 21-17? Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
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Oct 17, 2013 18:24
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CharlieFoxtrot posted:Well, I got everything I was supposed to get. I'm not going to buy any gummi bears, though... that quote had absolutely no effect on me whatsoever. Out of my way, all of you. This is no place for loafers! Join me or die! Can you do any less?
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Oct 17, 2013 21:02
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Everything Counts posted:I told you, no ethnic foods! No bowl, stick! Stick!
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Oct 18, 2013 03:44
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You have what made America great: no understanding of the limits of your power and a complete lack of concern for what anyone thinks of you.
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Oct 18, 2013 07:35
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Boywhiz88 posted:And now, the crazy old man dancers! Do the hustle! Deh deh deh dehdeh dehdeh deh deh...
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Oct 18, 2013 17:54
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Hmm, we didn't have a message when we left. How very odd... Number of messages: Zero.
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Oct 18, 2013 20:47
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jscolon2.0 posted:Goons can be so cruel. It says no jscolooooons. We're allowed to have one.
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Oct 19, 2013 00:05
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Drink-Mix Man posted:You didn't have to tell it like it is, Jerusalem. The fingers you have used to type are too fat. To obtain a special posting wand, please mash the keyboard with your palm now.
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Oct 19, 2013 00:27
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Hogburto posted:To find flanders, I just have to think like Flanders. Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all. Nothing at all. Nothing at all.
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Oct 19, 2013 03:28
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Pierce and Pierce posted:No, no! Why embarrass us both? Just write a check and I'll release some more endorphins. All right Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But let's just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.
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Oct 19, 2013 06:54
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Mister Kingdom posted:Don't cry for me. I'm already dead. Pray. For. Mister.
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Oct 19, 2013 19:01
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Ah, geez. There's a clog in the torso chute! Leroy! Get your rear end in gear! I think it's ironic that for once, Dad's butt actually prevented the release of toxic gas...
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Oct 20, 2013 21:14
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