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I lost a bet. Now I gotta do this. Here's how it'll go down: 1.) I watch all seven episodes of Allen Gregory. 2.) I post seven episode summaries to prove that I really did watch each one. 3.) I hate myself and think long and hard about my poor life choices. I honestly don't recommend reading this thread, and that isn't some fakeass Lemony Snicket warning this is a serious "No, really, nothing about this is going to be fun or enjoyable for anyone" warning. Except the first episode summary later tonight after I get off work. I have no one to blame for this but myself.
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Apr 13, 2017 22:10
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Allen Gregory Episode One: Abandon all Hope ye who Enter Here This is the one nice thing I’m going to say about Allen Gregory, it has some very well designed opening credits and a fantastic theme song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Di3BD-LJ084 I feel bad for the people who animated it and the person who wrote the music, whoever they are they’re too good to have their work associated with this travesty. The episode opens on a party. Two guys are standing in front of a crowd about to make a speech. One of them has hair and the other one doesn’t. They introduce themselves, but I don’t want to bother learning their names so I’m just going to call the bald one Lex Luther and the guy with hair Johnny Football. Lex Luther brutally belittles Johnny Football in front of their guests. Everyone looks super uncomfortable. It’s obvious that the show is aiming for cringe humor, but they can’t quite pull it off so the whole thing just up being unpleasant in a way that’s neither funny or entertaining (this is a recurring motif of the show). Turns out that Lex Luther and Johnny Football are life partners and they’ve adopted a daughter from Cambodia. She is, much like Diane Nguyen from Bojack Horseman, an Asian version of Daria and thus I’m going to be calling her “Asian Daria” from now on. Also, Bojack Horseman is a much better show than this. You should probably stop reading this right now and just go watch Bojack Horseman. Lex Luther takes a break from belittling Johnny Football to belittle Asian Daria for a bit, and then their other child the titular Allen Gregory arrives on screen and what was already a bad show suddenly gets a million times worse. I’m not going to be taking any screen shots of this show, because I’m pretty sure having images of Allen Gregory saved to your hard drive puts you on a government watch list (and if it doesn’t it should). Instead allow me to paint you a word picture of what Allen Gregory looks like: Imagine if Turman Capote got stuck halfway through animorphing into an aborted fetus and then somebody glued a bad toupee to his head. That’s what Allen Gregory looks like. Also, Jonah Hill voices him using his regular speaking voice and it’s super creepy seeing a grown man’s voice come out of that weird baby head. Allen Gregory makes a speech about how great he is, belittles Asian Daria just like his dad, and does his best to be the biggest douche in the room. I have never met a fictional character more in need of a punch in the face, but sadly that doesn’t happen. What does happen, however, is Lex Luther and Johnny Football telling their creepy baby man that Mr. Football is going back to work. This means Johnny Football won’t be able to Homeschool Allen anymore so he’ll have to…*drumroll*Go to elementary school like a regular child! *record scratch* Woah ho HO! What a fish out of water story we got going on here! Looks like a recipe for good times and hilarious shenanigans! Spoiler alert: The times will not actually be good and the shenanigans will in reality be bland and joyless. So Allen Gregory starts school. This pisses off Asian Daria, because being miserable is her only character trait so everything pisses her off. Allen treats his teacher like poo poo for no reason and receives no punishment for his actions (this is another recurring motif of the show). Cut to lunch, a kid named Patrick makes a bad life choice and tries to befriend Allen Gregory. Patrick is voiced by Cristina Pucelli who, unlike Jonah Hill, is actually capable of sounding like a small child. Her good voice acting makes his bad voice acting all the more blatant. Add Cristina Pucelli to the list of people who were too good for this show. Allen responds to Patrick’s kindness with disdain and instead tries to worm his way into the social circle a more popular kid named Joel Zadak because Allen Gregory is a brown-nosing parasite. Joel is an rear end in a top hat, but he’s better at detecting bullshit than Patrick is and rejects Allen outright (smart move). Allen then gets sent to Principals office for drinking wine at lunch, did I mention that Allen brought wine and sushi for lunch? No? That’s because it wasn’t funny. You know what else isn’t funny? Allen getting a tiny boner from staring at the principal’s fat rear end, but it happens anyway. Cue a minute-long dream sequence of a seven-year-old having vivid sexual fantasies involving himself and a sixty-year-old woman. This is why having images of Allen Gregory saved to your hard drive puts you on a government watch list (well, one of the reasons). Then Allen shits his pants. Just. Bam, pants making GBS threads out of nowhere. He runs home crying and, in theory, it should feel good to watch this little rear end in a top hat suffer. But watching him suffer still involves watching him, and anytime spent observing him in any way is unbearable. At this point I don’t even want to see him get his comeuppance, I just want him to disappear. Once he gets home he spends some time treating Johnny Football and Asian Daria like they’re even shittier than his pants. Despite his abuse Asian Daria still makes an attempt to be nice to him and he tells her to gently caress off. Some other bullshit happens, Will Forte shows up as the unfunny school superintendent (he’s also too good for this show), Keith David (He is REALLY too good for this show, drat!) shows up for some reason, Allen says he doesn’t want to go back to school, and that’s when we get Johnny Football’s disturbing backstory. The following are exact quotes from the show: Johnny Football: Allen Gregory Five years ago, I was a straight man. I had a wife, two kids, rock solid career, I was happier than I had ever been. And then, one day, I had a meeting with a potential client, and he was an older gay man and we had a connection. A strictly platonic one given my life long heterosexuality, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He persisted, He followed me everywhere, gave me flowers, gifts, he believed deep within his heart, that we were destined to be together. Allen Gregory: And you started to believe it too? Johnny Football: Eh, uh, the point is Allen Gregory that all the obstacles, he being straight as an arrow, my wife and kids, the restraining orders, they were irrelevant, in the end he got what he wanted. ….so yeah, turns out Lex Luther is a sexual predator who stalked, harassed, and emotionally abused Johnny Football into being with him. There…might be some way to make that situation funny? Maybe? But this show does not know what that way is. Instead this just come off as awful and makes all of Lex Luther’s and Johnny Football’s previous and future interactions even harder to watch than they already are. It’s black comedy without the comedy part. Then Allen breaks Patrick’s window. Just. Bam, window breaking out of nowhere. Apparently, Johnny Football’s story about how he was abused and exploited has inspired Allen Gregory to abuse and exploit others. He convinces superintendent Will Forte to tell everyone that he was actually the one who poo poo his pants, not Allen Gregory. Because Allen Gregory is rich you see and being rich means other people will humiliate themselves for you even if you’re a pretentious, irredeemable douche. That…yeah, that’s actually a lesson that’s pretty true to life, honestly. Too bad it was delivered in a way that wasn’t funny or interesting. Allen Gregory sexually harasses his principal, then the episode ends. Roll credits, feel bad for the poor souls who were forced to animate this crap. Okay, wow, great, one down six to go. Space Cadet Omoly fucked around with this message at 09:58 on Apr 14, 2017 |
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Apr 14, 2017 06:40
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Plom Bar posted:I got through two episodes and holy poo poo how in the gently caress did Jonah Hill ever get work Because the world is a cruel and unfair place. This all took longer to type up than I thought, my initial plan was to do all seven episodes in one night but I'm not sure if I wanna do that now (I'm already pretty tired and angry and bored). I'm probably going to do one more now and then do the rest Friday and Saturday. I can stay up late tonight because have the day off tomorrow, I thought I was going to have to take my Grandma to the doctors office (she's not sick, it's just a checkup), but it turns out she got the date wrong so I'm off the hook for that.
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Apr 14, 2017 06:50
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Allen Gregory Episode Two: Welcome to my Special Hell Allen Gregory is sitting in front of his elementary school watching his elderly principal get out of her car because that’s what gets him off. There are several close ups on the principal’s mouth as she eats a Danish and another close up on her wrinkly, vein covered rear end in a thong. Oh, and while all this is happening Jonah Hill narrates it in the creepiest voice imaginable. Watching this show makes me feel like I’m an accomplice to a sex crime. Allen Gregory tries to lie to the other kids about the principal being his girlfriend. No one believes him, not even Patrick whom he seems to have now enslaved (because it’s pretty unrealistic to think anyone would hang out with Allen Gregory voluntarily). He then lies and says he and the Principal have made a sex tape. … I checked the time, it’s only been three minutes. The episode is twenty-one minutes long. There are still eighteen more minutes of Jonah Hill sexually harassing a senior Citizen to go. Cut to Allen Gregory, Lex Luther, Johnny Football, and Asian Daria eating breakfast. Lex Luther encourages Allen Gregory to continue the sex tape lie because Lex Luther is a crazy persona and this show makes no sense. He also tells Asian Daria that she needs to invite her friends over to prove that they exist because in addition to being a crazy person he is also an rear end in a top hat. Allen Gregory gets on the school PA system and makes an announcement about the sex tape he and the principal have made. … So, we’re really doing this? This is really the plot we’re rolling with? I checked the time again, now it’s been five minutes. gently caress my life. The principal is (understandably) enraged that this horrible little gremlin is trying to convince her co-workers she’s a pedophile. She tries to get him to stop, but Allen Gregory is incapable of comprehending or caring about the emotions of other people and continues making his unwanted advances. The principal is (correctly) convinced that he’s mentally disturbed and forces him to go see the Guidance Counselor. Allen Gregory treats the guidance counselor with the same unfunny disdain that he treats everyone else and they engage in some unfunny banter. Oh, and it turns out the Principal and the Guidance Counselor are in a romantic relationship so I guess we’re gonna have to listen to Allen Gregory bitch about that now and probably try to force them to break them up because he’s a horrible nightmare child. Cut to Asian Daria introducing Lex Luther to her friends. Lex Luther treats them with the same unfunny disdain that he treats everyone else and they engage in some unfunny banter. Cut back to Allen Gregory and Patrick at school. Allen is pissed, Patrick mentions that he has to see the guidance counselor everyday “Since I found my sisters body” and, God help me, I actually laughed at that line. It just comes out of nowhere, it’s never touched on again, and it’s delivered perfectly. That’s dark humor done right, I suspect it won’t happen again. The sex tape plot continues and remains unbearable and incomprehensible. Joel Zadak, the popular kid Allen Gregory is always trying to suck up too, also releases a sex tape. Except it’s not a sex tape it’s just a video of him holding hands with a girl, because kids don’t actually know what sex is you see. Yup. That’s it. That’s the whole joke. … I checked the time once more. It’s been ten minutes, almost halfway done. Allen Gregory continues trying to convince the Guidance Counselor that he hosed his wife. … Eleven minutes. Allen Gregory says he’ll bring the sex tape to school tomorrow and show everyone. Then he goes to a sauna so he can talk to Keith David. Man, hearing Keith David talk is a delight. It doesn’t even matter what stupid poo poo this dumb show has him saying, I just love listening to that guy. At this point Allen Gregory made a rape joke. Or rather, a rape statement. Joke implies that something funny was said and nothing Allen Gregory says is ever funny. Allen Gregory just sort of talked about Lex Luther raping Football Johnny for a while and I sat there listening and thinking about the poor life choices I’ve made that led me to this moment. Lex Luther has hired actors to be Asian Daria’s fake friends because he doesn’t like her real ones. I don’t care about this subplot and neither should you. Lex Luther convinces Allen Gregory to keep the sex tape lie going at all costs. The Guidance Counselor has started to actually believe that his wife might have had sex with this seven-year-old turd. His reaction to this isn’t shock and revulsion because “oh gently caress, my wife is pedophile” it’s jealousy because “oh man, this first grader could be better at sex than I am!” … Nineteen minutes, we’re almost done here. Allen Gregory destroys a dvd containing footage of the obviously fake sex tape in front of his class, this somehow counts as a victory for him and all the other kids now believe that the sex tape might have been real all along. Slow zoom in on Allen Gregory’s horrible, smug face. Cut to a scene of the Guidance Counselor trying to repair the destroyed DVD because he sincerely believes his sixty-year wife banged a seven-year-old. … gently caress this show. Two down, five to go.
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Apr 14, 2017 09:51
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As Nero Danced posted:Napoleon Dynamite cartoon look alright, like ten years after the movie came out. It's been years since I saw the Napoleon Dynamite cartoon, but from what I remember it really wasn't that bad. Sure it was weird that it came out ten years after the movie, but other than that it was pretty inoffensive and even funny at time. Of course, that could just be because like you said next to Allen Gregory everything looks good.
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Apr 14, 2017 09:55
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Clawtopsy posted:how's that whole "having hope" and "being optimistic" thing working out for you? Not so great, honestly, kinda feeling the full weight of my hubris right now. And yet, in spite of everything, I haven't learned my lesson. Really looking forward to playing Hiveswap in the 2020's! It's gonna be great! What a smashing way to kick off the new decade! Two or three more episode summaries coming late tonight (or I guess early tomorrow morning since they'll probably be released around midnight) in the meantime here's a fun game: try to come up with an Allen Gregory themed cocktail. Here's mine, it's called "This Tastes the way watching the show feels": 2 fluid ounces cough syrup 1 fluid ounce toilet water Serve in an old gym shoe, Garnish with grocery store sushi that's been left in the sun. Drink in the dark while thinking about your worst mistakes.
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Apr 14, 2017 22:11
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Allen Gregory Episode Three: You look at him and Tell me There’s a God. This episode starts with Joel Zadock (the popular douchebag kid) forcing Allen Gregory to drink toilet water. This was a major mistake on Joel’s part, he really should have drowned Allen in that toilet. Unfortunately, since Allen was allowed to live, he goes home, tells his dads what happened, Lex Luther makes a joke about raping Johnny Football, blah blah blah homophobia, and then Lex Luther decides Allen Gregory’s school needs to have a gay dance where boys are required to ask boys out and girls are required to ask girls out. Asian Daria makes a joke about how this plotline is stupid and makes no sense, but if the writers had enough self-awareness to realize that why did they write it anyway? Why not write something else instead? Or just write nothing else? Cut to Parent's night at Allen Gregory’s school, Allen Gregory introduces his dads to his class and makes a joke about Lex Luther raping Johnny Football. Was it really necessary to make Lex Luther a rapist? This show sure seems to think so. The kids in Allen’s class think Lex Luther is a boring turd (just like me), but they like Johnny Football because he’s a DJ and one of the only non-rear end in a top hat characters on this show. In fact, they like him so much that they want him to DJ their school dance! Hey, good for Johnny Football! Maybe he’ll make so much money that he’ll be able to move out and leave the abusive relationship he’s trapped in behind! But no, Lex Luther won’t let Johnny Football DJ. Also, Lex Luther is allowed to take over all the planning for the school dance because he’s rich or whatever who cares. So yeah, the dance is gay now, and the kids are all okay with that. Good for them, they’re less homophobic than the people who wrote this episode! Patrick tries to ask out Allen Gregory (because Patrick has poo poo taste in men) but Allen only wants to go with Joel because Allen Gregory is a heartless social climber with a fetish for drinking toilet water. Allen Gregory treats Patrick like poo poo for a bit because that’s just what he does to anyone dumb enough to be nice to him. Cut to Lex Luther harassing Johnny Football at work and getting him fired because Lex Luther is a petty rear end in a top hat. Allen Gregory asks Joel to the dance. Joel promptly rejects him because Joel may be a douchebag, but he’s a douchebag with standards. Joel then asks out Patrick. Hey, good choice! Patrick is another one of the few non-rear end in a top hat characters on this show! Allen Gregory treats Patrick like poo poo some more. Johnny Football is pissed about Lex Luther getting him fired. Johnny Football and Lex Luther’s interactions would be a lot more enjoyable if Lex Luther wasn’t a rapist. The writers should have just kept them as a regular couple instead of making them a sexual predator and his victim. Uh-oh, turns out the only reason Joel asked Parick to the dance was so he could humiliate him by pulling his pants down in front of the whole school! But why? Why do that to Patrick and not Allen Gregory? Joel has barely interacted with Patrick before now, he has no reason to hate him and every reason to hate Allen Gregory the irritating parasite who’s constantly harassing him. Ugh, whatever, let’s just keep moving, I can already tell that I’ve thought more about this than the person who wrote it. Allen Gregory overhears Joel’s plot. Asian Daria and the principal also over hear it, I forgot to mention that there’s a subplot about them trying to stop the dance because blah blah blah who cares. They’re also trying to get Allen Gregory expelled, but I know that’s going to fail because there’s still four more episodes of this crap. Allen Gregory continues being a douche to Patrick, I guess he’s not going to warn him about Joel’s nonsensical plot to humiliate him because much like his father he’s petty rear end in a top hat. Then Asian Daria talks Allen Gregory into pantsing Patrick instead of Joel because she wants to get her brother expelled. Just kill him Asian Daria. Just kill him and end out suffering. Allen Gregory tries to pull off Patrick’s pants put fucks it up so hard that he ends up getting his own pants pulled off instead. He then makes a speech that makes no sense. Patrick thinks Allen Gregory saved him and so he stays his friend. Great, woooo. Oh, and Johnny Football gets to DJ after all! That makes all the rape okay I guess! End of episode. I was going to watch two episodes tonight, but I don’t want to anymore. I’m going to bed. I’ll do another one tomorrow.
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Apr 15, 2017 10:42
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Allen Gregory Episode four: Not as bad as it could have been? The episode opens on Lex Luther in a board meeting and I make a startling discovery: Lex Luther is actually kind of funny. Yeah, I know, shocking! See, it turns out everyone at the company he owns thinks he’s a pretentious idiot (because he is). He has no real power (although he THINKS he does), they just grudgingly tolerate him because they have so much respect for his father. When Lex Luther is acting like a buffoon instead of an abusive rapist he suddenly becomes a lot more fun to watch. I mean, it’s not the most original idea (If you’ve ever watched “arrested development” or “the office” you’ve seen the same style of comedy done better), but it’s tolerable. Hell, it’s almost even enjoyable! Why do I hate this show so much- Then Allen Gregory shows up and I instantly remember. Allen is trying to forcibly befriend Joel again, it wasn’t funny the first three times and it’s not funny now. Joel’s girlfriend, who’s name I can’t remember so I’m just gonna call her Princess Peach, makes the mistake of trying to be nice to Allen Gregory even though he’s acting like an rear end in a top hat. This pisses Joel off so he starts being an rear end in a top hat to her too. Poor Princess Peach is stuck between a douche and a hard place. Joel poor chocolate milk down Allen Gregory’s pants. It looks like Princess Peach is feeling sorry for him because she’s a kind soul with bad judgment. And then we cut back to Lex Luther at work. This part isn’t so bad, like I said it’s basically just like watching a knock off version of “Arrested Development”. Speaking of Knock offs, I think now is a good time to mention that Lex Luther looks and acts exactly like a knock off version of Jim Rash doing his Dean character from Community. In fact the first time I heard him I thought he WAS voice by Jim Rash (he’s not, he’s voiced by French Stewart). I wonder if this portrayal could count as defamation of character in court if Jim Rash sued...? Damnit, now Allen Gregory is back on screen again. Blah blah blah Joel is out sick, Allen Gregory wants to stalk him while he’s weak and vulnerable. Lex Luther, Johnny Football, and Asian Daria all have a scene together in which Lex Luther finds out everyone at his company thinks he’s a moron. Ya know, Allen Gregory minus Allen Gregory wouldn’t be such a bad show. It wouldn’t be a great show, but it wouldn’t be unbearable. Provided you also changed it so that Lex Luther and Johnny Football were just a normal couple instead of a rapist and a guy with Stockholm syndrome. Allen Gregory has broken into Joel’s house. I’d feel sorry for Joel if he weren’t as big of a turd as Allen is. I hope this episode ends with them both falling into a bottomless pit forever, but I know it won’t. Lex Luther and Johnny Football are back at the office! Jokes are happening! This subplot is pretty good! When the writers aren’t throwing in gags about sexual assault Lex Luther and Johnny Football actually have decent chemistry and comedic timing! Can we just watch this for the rest of the episode? Nope, back to Allen Gregory. He’s taking over Joel’s life while Joel is out sick. Most of Joel’s friends are understandably creeped out by this, but for some odd reason Princess Peach finds Allen Gregory’s invasiveness charming. I guess she’s just so used to dating douchebags she can’t imagine living her life without one. Poor, poor Princess Peach. Yay! Back to the Lex Luther Subplot! He’s just learned his whole life is a lie, and now he wants to try doing some real work for a change. I’m actually kind of interested in seeing where this is going- Boo! Back to Allen Gregory! Allen Gregory has usurped Joel as Alpha douche in his absence, but insists that he’s only doing it for Joel’s benefit and he’s acting pretty sincere about it. Which doesn’t really make sense given his character? Like, the only reason he seems to want to befriend Joel is because Joel is popular and if he can be popular without Joel then why would he bother with Joel? Whatever, I’m over thinking this. Princess Peach wants to break up with Joel. Good for her, except the reason she wants to dump him is because she wants to date Allen Gregory instead. Clearly she’s gone mad. Allen Gregory is actually kind of upset by this, I guess he does care about Joel in his own hosed up way. Lex Luther fucks up royally at work and everybody hates him. Keith David shows up to say some stuff. I think he’s like Allen Gregory’s personal trainer or something? Anyway, Keith David tells Allen Gregory to be an rear end in a top hat. For the first time ever Allen is reluctant to do so. I still have no idea why Allen cares about Joel other than “the plot says so”. Annnnnnd here’s where the Lex Luther story-line falls apart. Instead of facing consequences for his actions it looks like he’s going to magically fix things by doing the same stupid poo poo he did to gently caress everything up. I don’t wanna see that, no one wants to see that, I want to see this pretentious gently caress suffer not succeed! Joel’s friends all like it better when Joel isn’t around, which makes sense because Joel is awful. Still doesn’t explain why they like Allen Gregory though. Joel comes back to school and everyone just wants to ignore him, but Allen Gregory decides to use his douchiness powers for good(?) and brutally insults all of Joel’s friends. The other kids decide that the abuse Joel heaps on them is slightly more bearable than the abuse Allen Gregory is capable of dishing out so they go back being his friend. Then Allen Gregory gets chocolate milk poured down his pants again. I guess the only time Allen Gregory is capable of being kind is when he’s helping another bully stay in power? Even if that bully being in power benefits him in no way? But wait, Holy poo poo, I was wrong about the Lex Luther subplot! The reason he’s able to magic a solution out of his rear end is because the whole thing was a scam! They never really gave him more power, they just tricked him into thinking they did. He’s still an idiot and a gently caress up! And everyone knows he’s an idiot and a gently caress up! And the way that he looks back at the building at the end as he’s being driven away implies that on some level he also knows that he’s an idiot and a gently caress up, but he’s not going try and fight it anymore because living a lie is easier. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that’s a pretty clever twist. Oh, and Lex Luther and Johnny Football actually have a pretty sweet moment together. Lex Luther doesn’t treat Johnny Football like total poo poo, Johnny Football is happy, it’s like I’m watching a completely different show where they really are just a regular couple. If Lex Luther was the protagonist, and he and Johnny Football were always written the way they were in this subplot, and Asian Daria was their only child, this show probably would have gotten more than seven episodes. But he's not, and they're not, and she's not, so it didn't.
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Apr 16, 2017 10:58
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Sorry about not posting any episode summaries for a while. I just bought Persona 5 and it turns out that's a lot more fun than torturing myself with lovely cartoons. But I  ed myself over this so I might as well get it over with before I forget. So without further ado I bring you a fine fresh turd, enjoy (although I don't see how you possibly could).Allen Gregory Episode Five: And then things got awful again Allen Gregory is still a worthless turd and Lex Luther is back to treating Johnny Football like garbage for no reason. I’m starting to suspect the last episodes surprisingly good Lex Luther subplot was just a momentary fluke because now I find him unbearable again. Maybe I was just extra sleep deprived when I watched it. Maybe I dreamed it. Anyway, Allen Gregory fires the maid because he walked in on her pooping. Then he goes to school and tries to fire one of the other students because that student is Latino and Allen Gregory assumes that all Latino people are maids. … Like, I get what they’re going for. They’re trying to show that racism is awful by making an awful an awful character be racist. But couldn’t they also just, I dunno, not be racist? It takes a lot of skill and effort to make racial humor insightful instead of abhorrent, and I really don’t think the writers of this show are up to the task. At all. The temp agency Johnny Football works for sends him to be the new maid in his own home. Why is Johnny Football working for a temp agency at all? The first episode implies that Lex Luther is having money troubles (maybe?) but never clarifies what those money troubles might be and a few other episodes imply that the company Lex Luther gets his money from is going out of business. However, last episode establishes that the company is actually doing very well. So why is Lex Luther suddenly forcing Johnny Football to get a degrading job? Is he just doing it to humiliate him because Lex Luther is a horrible person? Yeah, yeah that’s probably it. Allen Gregory continues to be racist. His teachers tries to get him to be less racist. She does not succeed. She does, however, force him to write a 50 word essay about why what he did was wrong. This should be super easy (Hell, I’ve already written like over 300 hundred words just now about everything Allen Gregory does wrong), but there’s no doubt in my mind that Allen Gregory will find some way to gently caress this up. Huh, turns out Lex Luther intentionally put out the ad for the maid position at the temp agency he knew Johnny Football was going to so Johnny Football would take it so they can hang out together while Johnny Football is working. But, again, why? Why do any of this? I still don’t understand what Lex Luther’s endgame is, if he wants to hang out with Johnny Football he could just ask him “Hey let’s hang out.” Since they’re dating (well, not really dating, it’s more like he’s holding Johnny Football hostage) and they don’t seem to need the money? I guess he really does just like humiliating Football Johnny. After a talk with his idiot bio-dad Allen Gregory decides to write a racist play instead of writing (or rather, forcing Patrick to write) an anti-racism essay. No good can come of this. No good EVER comes of this. Asian Daria takes a minute to point out that everything that’s happening is stupid and makes no sense. No one listens, no one EVER listens. Oh, and Asian Daria’s two friends are going to be in Allen’s stupid play because they’re worthless enablers too dumb to realize they’re supporting a sociopath. I don’t think I’ve written much about Asian Daria’s two friends, because there’s really not much to say about them. They show up in almost every episode, but I usually just zone out whenever they speak. You can tell the writers really put a lot of effort into making them as uninteresting as possible. Which is better, I guess, than the effort they put into making everyone else as awful as possible. Lex Luther continues degrading Johnny Football. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it isn’t funny or enjoyable. It feels like I’m watching the world’s worst softcore S&M session. Guillermo (The Latino kid Allen Gregory “fired”) is now being forced by Allen Gregory to be in his racist play. I have no idea why Guillermo’s going along with this. Just punch the little poo poo, Guillermo, it’s not hard. This is one of the few times in life where violence isn’t just the right answer, it’s the ONLY answer. Punch him Guillermo, and don’t stop punching him until he stops moving. Only then will you be free, only then will we ALL be free. Oh God damnit, Asian Daria is also going to be in Allen Gregory’s stupid play. He’s not even blackmailing her or anything, she’s just going along with it because she’s desperate for attention and has no moral integrity. I’m starting to think I should start calling her Asian Meg Griffin. Also, speaking of Meg Griffin, I think it’s time I point out the obvious: Allen Gregory is a cheap, significantly worse, knock off version of Stewie Griffin. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if this whole show is just a loose adaptation of Jonah Hill’s Family Guy fanfiction which he wrote while high and never edited. Back to Lex Luther tormenting Johnny football. Unless the episode ends with Johnny Football murdering Lex Luther this subplot is going to feel like a waste. Guillermo tries to tell Allen Gregory that his play is racist, Allen Gregory tries to convince Guillermo that it is in fact him who is the real racist because he’s pointing out how racist Allen Gregory is being. Unless the episode ends with Guillermo murdering Allen Gregory this main plot is going to feel like a waste. Guillermo quits the play and Allen Gregory’s teacher does what she should have done right away and shuts down Allen Gregory’s racist play. Good, great, except there are still 8 loving minutes left in the episode so I know this little poo poo is going to somehow end up staging his play anyway. And then we find out that Allen Gregory’s teacher was raped by the school super intendent. Great. Good. More rape. Just what this show needed. Gina (I’m going to start calling Allen Gregory’s teacher by her name now, I feel like she deserves some small amount of dignity and the show certainly isn’t going to give it to her) is forced by her rapist boss to allow Allen Gregory to put on his racist play. Why did someone write this? Why did they force other people to animate it? Why, just, why any of this? Johnny Football quits his job, but he doesn’t kill Lex Luther, episodes not over yet though so there’ still hope. Keith David shows up to tell Allen Gregory that he’s not really racist. This is the worst thing Keith David has ever been forced to do, and Keith David was on The Cape. I’ve never actually seen The Cape, I’m just assuming it was bad because it was canceled after one season. Just like Allen Gregory (Thank God). Allen Gregory stages his racist play, and holy poo poo is it racist. I have never wanted to punch Jonah Hill more than I do right now. People start to boo Allen Gregory’s horrible, HORRIBLE play. It looks like Allen Gregory might actually face consequences for his terrible actions, but then things wrap up in the dumbest way possible: Guillermo (who has decided to attend this loving play for some unknown reason despite knowing how bad and racist it was going to be) walks on stage and literally says “racism is bad”, this is enough to get the crowd cheering. Allen Gregory gets credit for Guillermo’s actions and now everything thinks Allen Gregory’s racist play is good. Allen Gregory gets a standing ovation. gently caress this show. This is the worst episode yet. I feel retroactively ashamed about having said nice things about the last episode because this one is so bad it cancels all the good stuff out. Two more episodes left. I know they’ll be bad, but they can’t possibly be more unpleasant than this. Space Cadet Omoly fucked around with this message at 09:27 on Apr 20, 2017 |
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Apr 20, 2017 09:16
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As Nero Danced posted:a meteor doesn't take out Allen or the bald dad. That's a shame, every episode of this show should end with a meteor taking out Allen Gregory and bald dad.
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Apr 20, 2017 20:02
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bunnyofdoom posted:Wait, hang the gently caress on, what is with all the rape as a humour thing? Like Lex Luthor and Johnny Football, the teacher, and all that. Is Jonah Hill a rapist? First of all, no I don't think Jonah Hill is a rapist. I do, however, I think he (and whoever else was involved in making this show) thought "edgy" automatically meant "good" and was badly mistaken. Like I said before, there aren't so much "rape jokes" in Allen Gregory as there are "rape statements". Instead of trying to tell jokes about rape or where rape is the punchline characters just sort of mention things like "I was recently sexually assaulted" or "I have recently committed a sexual assault and plan to do so again in the near future". It's the laziest kind of shock humor, and it's repeated ad nauseum every episode. It's completely unnecessary too: the one episode where Lex Luther and Johnny Football aren't reduced to being walking rape/abuse jokes is the one episode where they're both funny and engaging. Lex Luther is a pretentious buffoon, Johnny Football is down to earth and rational, they play well off each other. If the show had just been a character driven comedy about two regular gay guys living in the city and loving each other it probably would have been much better. Trying too hard to be shocking, ironically, made the the show duller and less intresting. Anyway, new episode summary coming soon.
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Apr 21, 2017 07:09
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Allen Gregory Episode Six: Like a Yeast Infection for Your Eyes After some unfunny classroom banter and unfunny jokes about male pregnancy (I could go into more detail on these, but I won’t. Just trust me when I say they’re awful.) Allen Gregory decides he wants to meet his birth mother. Lex Luther doesn’t want him to find his mom for…some reason…I guess to stretch the plot out? Anyway, Allen Gregory gets Keith David to drive him to the Hall of Record so he can try and find his mom anyway. Keith David starts a fire and grabs Allen Gregory’s mom’s file in a scene that might have been funny if Allen Gregory wasn’t involved. It turns out Allen Gregory’s mom is waitress named Sheila. I already feel incredibly sorry for her. If I found out I had given birth to a childlike demon creature such as Allen Gregory I would kill it and then myself to atone for my sins. Hopefully Sheila handles her grief a bit better. Allen Gregory meets his mom for the first time. It is a scene that is utterly devoid of human emotion. Despite not seeming to like her (although he doesn’t really like anybody) Allen Gregory decides he wants his mom back in his life. Rather than just telling her he’s her bio-son he decides to trick her into dating his gay dad. Hilarious antics do not ensue. Lex Luther, Sheila, and Allen Gregory have a family day together. Johnny Football also comes and is relentlessly abused. Asian Meg Griffin was left at home. Allen Gregory forces Johnny Football to sleep on the couch so Sheila can sleep in his bed. Asian Meg Griffin warns Johnny Football he’s being pushed out of the family. I have no idea why he wouldn’t WANT to be pushed out. Lex Luther constantly rapes him, Allen Gregory is a nightmare child, getting thrown out of this abusive household would be the best thing that ever happened to Johnny Football. Turns out Asian Meg Griffin is right; Allen Gregory takes her and Johnny Football out to dinner and “breaks up” with Johnny Football. Johnny Football should take this opportunity to run as fast as he can and has far as he can away from all these horrible people (maybe take Asian Meg Griffin with him, she can be cool sometimes), but Stockholm Syndrome compels him to want to stay with Lex Luther. Speaking of Lex Luther, he’s about to have sex with Sheila. He doesn’t want to, but he is. Because that’s what Allen Gregory wants, and even Lex Luther must bend to the whims of the demon child. I have no idea why Sheila even WANTS to have sex with him, Lex Luther is both clearly gay and treats her like garbage, I guess she just wants to move the plot along. And so Johnny Football walks in on Sheila and Lex Luther having awkward and unpleasant sex. After seeing this he FINALLY decides to leave his long-time rapist/abuser. Hurray! It’s a happy ending! Wait, what? There’s still eight more minutes left in the episode? Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. Sheila moves in right away and starts trying to make Allen Gregory do chores and tells Asian Meg Griffin to call her mom. Which, uh, yeah, that’s actually kind of weird. I mean, the episode tries to play it off as normal and presents Allen Gregory being an rear end in a top hat for not going along with it, but she just met these people. It’s weird to move in with someone you just met (was she homeless before this?), it’s weird to start aggressively parenting two kids you just met, and it’s extra weird to just force yourself into the lives of strangers. Why is she doing this? I guess she just wants to move the plot along. Cut to Johnny Football in a bar. He and the bar tender have a long conversation about how Johnny football is better off without Lex Luther and how there’s no logical reason for him to want to go back to him and there’s nothing that he’s left behind that’s worth missing. Johnny football is going to go back to Lex Luther at the end of this episode anyway, isn’t he? Sheila continues aggressively parenting Allen Gregory and Allen Gregory doesn’t enjoy it. As great as it is seeing Allen Gregory suffer, it’s still kinda weird that this lady has so little going on in her life that she’s willing to drop everything and devote her entire existence to a boy she barely knows. But then I guess that’s what everyone one else on the show does too. Oh, and Lex Luther is miserable now that Johnny football is gone. Good, gently caress Lex Luther. Cut to Johnny Football in his new apartment, happily drinking a beer and watching TV. Looks like he’s off to a good start with his new life! Then Allen Gregory shows up (Boo!) and tries to drag Johnny Football back to a life of abuse because he’s decided he hates his new mom and wants Johnny Football to kick her out. Long story short, he succeeds and tricks Johnny Football into going back to Lex Luther (Booooooooooooo!) and so Lex Luther and Johnny Football get back together (Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!). Oh, and Sheila decides to leave and have no further contact with Allen Gregory. Wait, what, why? Why would she suddenly give up on this kid she’s suddenly decided to get so emotionally invested in? Sure, he’s awful, but it’s only been like a day, you’d think she’d at least give it a week before giving up. I guess she’s just decided the plot is over. Anyway, turns out Sheila isn’t even Allen Gregory’s real birth mother, Keith David just grabbed a random file after starting that fire. Guess this episode was absolutely pointless! Welp, that was episode six. It was bad, but not as bad as episode five. It’s was mostly just illogical and boring. Only one more episode to go, after that let us never speak of Allen Gregory again. Note: Someone said I should do both of the last two episodes in one night, but I don't want to so I won't be doing that. I'll post the final one tomorrow.
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Apr 21, 2017 07:45
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As Nero Danced posted:Refresh my memory, if you don't mind. Didn't Sheila tell Allen in the last scene that he was a rotten little brat with no redeeming qualities, and that she couldn't stand to be in his presence any longer? Well, she says he's "An awful little boy who says horrible things", but that's about it. She also calls Lex Luther "A very gay man". I have a feeling the verbal beat down you're imagining in your head is a lot better than the weaksauce one that actually happened, hold onto that memory. Sheila is an interesting idea for a character (a decent human being who calls Allen Gregory on his poo poo), but she's poorly executed and her actions make no sense: Why is she moving in with strangers she just met? Why does she suddenly want to to intensely mother a child she only had because she was paid to be a surrogate? Why would she want to have sex with Lex Luther? Why is she suddenly moving out and giving up on this child so quickly? As weird as it feels to say this, I don't think Allen Gregory was enough of a jerk this episode; or at least not enough of a jerk to Shelia. She just has one small fight with him and that was enough to convince her "Welp, this situation is hopeless. Guess I better cut all ties". It would have worked better to have been a slow build up of him being more and more of an rear end in a top hat to her until she just can't take it anymore and explodes and starts screaming at him about how awful he is.
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Apr 21, 2017 09:13
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Clawtopsy posted:p sure the op is putting more thoughts into their posts than the writers did the show This is almost certainly true. Propaganda Machine posted:I think OP and friend put more thought into their bet than the writers did into the show. This is also probably true. I've decided to push back doing the last episode until tomorrow. I'm playing Persona 5 and having a great time and I'd rather just keep doing that instead ruining my mood with Allen Gregory. Although, in a weird way, I've had a strangely good time writing this crap and I'm kinda sad to see it end. I'm almost tempted to keep this thread going and start rewatching and revewing "Chozen", another bad show with an unlikable protagonist that for some weird reason I have a lot of opinions on. I'm not sure anyone would be interested in that though, does anyone other than me even remember that "Chozen" exists?
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Apr 22, 2017 05:38
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precision posted:Other notably terrible animated poo poo: Brickleberry, The Goode Family (which I wanted to like because Mike Judge but god was it baaaaaad) I’ve seen every episode of both of those shows, and I really don’t think I’d be able to write entertaining episode summaries for either of them. They’re bad, but in ways I find too stupid/bland to care enough about to get properly angry at. Like, here are my complete thoughts on Brickleberry: It’s Family Guy, but in the woods. It relies heavily on shock and gross-out humor and doesn’t do either one particularly well. It got three seasons though, so I guess someone must have liked it. And here are my complete thoughts on The Goode Family: It’s King of The Hill, but with liberals and worse writing. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen it, but I actually remember thinking it had some potential. It was a “This isn’t good now, but maybe they’ll find their footing in season 2” situation. It got canceled after one season though, so I guess we’ll never know (I could have been way wrong about this too, it’s possible my slightly positive feelings for the show were just left over good will from King of The Hill. This is just how I feel though, if someone more passionate thinks they can come up with an entertaining rant about either of these shows I’d love to read it. bunnyofdoom posted:What about the Australian Archer ripoff? Holy poo poo, Pacific Heat? Oh man, I DEFINITELY couldn’t bring myself to care enough about that show to get entertainingly mad at it. I don’t think anyone can. That show is one of the blandest things to ever be animated. It’s a bit amazing, it’s so dull and generic you actually forget about it as you’re watching it. twistedmentat posted:I also had no idea Squidbillys was still going after 13 seasons. Very few people will believe me when I say this, but Squidbillies is actually a good show. It’s a very specific brand of pitch black dark humor and I completely understand why it doesn’t appeal to everyone, but it does what it’s trying to do very well. twistedmentat posted:You know what I loved, even if it was basically just a reskinned Archer? Moonbeam City. It only got one season, but I read it was really expensive, which probably not surprising because the core cast was Elizabeth Banks, Rob Lowe and Kate Mara. It had the most amazing soundtrack and I became a big fan of Night Club because of it. I loved the art style of Moonbeam City, and like you said the music was great. The aesthetic was a lot stronger than the writing (most episodes ranged from “Meh” to “Kind of okay I guess”), but like The Goode Family I thought it showed potential and was a little sad when I heard it got canceled. precision posted:Perfect Hair Forever and 12 oz. Mouse were from the same guy I can see that. Chozen is a failure, but at times it’s an interesting failure and I’d be willing to bet that he had a hand in the creating some of the more interesting parts. See, the main reason I want to voluntarily write about Chozen isn’t because it makes me angry, but more because it makes me wonder “Why did you do this?” Like, it’ll make some really good choices (okay maybe good is too strong of a word here, “unique”-ish choices?) and then cancel them out with a hundred other bad choices so I mostly just end up feeling confused and only occasionally disgusted. Unlike with Allen Gregory where I’m just constantly feeling incredibly irritated by that horribly, unfunny voice- Oh poo poo, I still have one last episode of Allen Gregory left don’t I? And I was supposed to post a summary of it like, two days ago wasn’t I? Yeah, sorry about that, been busy at work. I’ll get on that as soon as I can, but now (like, right now) I gotta go do job stuff. Space Cadet Omoly fucked around with this message at 19:48 on Apr 24, 2017 |
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Apr 24, 2017 19:41
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Plom Bar posted:Just one episode left Omoly andiamo Ugh, fine. I’ve put it off long enough, time to end this. Allen Gregory Episode Seven: Let’s Just Get This Over With Welp, this is it, the final episode of Allen Gregory. I’ve actually never seen this one before, and yet I already know that it’s going to suck. I’m not going to miss this show, but I am going to miss this theme song. Goodbye Allen Gregory theme song, you were like a shining diamond in a mountain of crap. The episode opens with a funeral. Sadly, it isn’t Allen Gregory’s funeral. Instead, the elderly Principal he’s always stalking appears to have died. At least now she’s finally free from Allen’s inappropriate advances, good for her. Except, no, she’s not dead. It was all just a creepy dream, and now Allen Gregory is awake so he can be creepy to her in real life. Poor woman, I’m sure that by the end of this episode she will be praying for death. Lex Luther is being super racist and wants to exploit Asian Meg Griffin for a fundraiser. Lex Luther seems extra annoying this episode, I think taking a break from this show diminished my tolerance for it. I had built up an immunity, but now that’s gone and I just want to punch everyone and everything. Allen Gregory’s dream has inspired him to double down on sexually harassing his Principal. If she ends up killing him because of this she’ll be a hero. Cut to a scene of Allen Gregory’s 80 year old principal in the shower. Joy. It seems she’s having marriage problems, her husband (you know, the guidance consoler from episode two?) just isn’t romantic. Also she treats him like poo poo, because everyone on this show is an rear end in a top hat to everyone around them. Speaking of being treated like poo poo, Johnny Football and Lex Luther are out shopping. Looks like Lex Luther has an old Rival from college (can’t remember his name, let’s just call him “Gary Oak”) who’s come back to torment him. That’s fine by me, Lex Luther being miserable is always a good thing. Gary Oak and Johnny Football are really getting along, hope they get together but I know they won’t. Gary Oak is running the charity Lex Luther is trying to exploit Asian Meg Griffin for, I’m sure unfunny shenanigans will ensue. Oh, and it turns out Gary Oak has also adopted a child, and that child is from Africa so of course Lex Luther says some racist stuff. Joy. Allen Gregory storms into The Principals office. She tells him to gently caress off, but he doesn’t. Then something incredible happens: she hits him. Just, Bam, gives him five across the eyes and sends him flying across the room like a ragdoll. Holy poo poo, it is by far the only moment of this show that has made me experience pure joy. I could never cheer on child abuse, but Allen Gregory is not a child he’s a small and hideous man demon and any violence done against him is inherently justified. If that slap killed him and the rest of the episode is just the Principal disposing of his body then getting margaritas to celebrate I will take back every bad thing I’ve ever said about this show and rate it a 10/10. But, Unfortunately, Allen Gregory survives this attack and so the show will remain at a 0/10. Instead of being dead he just throws up and runs off. Lex Luther is pissed that Gary Oak has an African son because the fundraiser is for Africa and having an African son is more on theme than having a Cambodian daughter and Asian Meg Griffin is Cambodian and uugggghhhhhhhhhfffffuuuuu I hated typing that almost as much as I hated hearing it. Lex Luther contemplates switching out Asian Meg Griffin for an African child, Johnny Football won’t let him because Johnny Football has a soul. Instead, Johnny Football recommends talking to Asian Meg Griffin so Lex Luther can get to know her better-wait, what? The problem here isn’t that Lex Luther and Asian Meg Griffin don’t know each other, the problem is that Lex Luther is a fundamentally evil man who treats people like objects. How will them talking fix that? Cut back to Allen Gregory and the Principal. Instead of finishing the job and murdering the little turd The Principal is having a chat with him. The Principal apologizes (BOOOOOOOO!) and tells Allen Gregory that she would lose her job if anyone found out she hit a child. Allen Gregory decides to exploit this situation for personal gain and forces the Principal to have go on a dinner date with him. The Principal really should have killed him when she had the chance. Cut to Johnny Football asking Lex Luther Questions about Asian Meg Griffin off flashcards. He gets none of them right. Asian Meg Griffin is in the room when they do this, she gets to watch as her father makes it obvious he knows nothing about her. And it’s not a situation where she walks into the room and accidentally overhears what they’re saying they’re all sitting at the table together, they wanted her to hear all this. Christ, couldn’t they have just taken the poor kid out for ice cream? Allen Gregory has bought the Principal a black dress for their date and instructed her to “Wear this and nothing else” just to prove that anyone who thought he couldn’t get any creepier was wrong. The worst/weirdest part is that she’s kind of into it. They show her looking in the mirror and going “Hey this is a nice dress” and not “Oh gently caress this and gently caress this kid to Hell”. Her husband shows up, she does not tell him about her date with Allen Gregory. Makes sense, he already kind of thinks she had sex with this kid (that was a Hell of second episode, wasn’t it?) if he found the two of them are going on a date together he might call the cops (and would be fully justified in doing so). Asian Meg Griffin is at school, Lex Luther shows up to treat her like poo poo some more. Since he can’t be bothered to learn her interests he’s come up with new interests for her to memorize. She tells him to gently caress off. Good. I hope she never forgives him and that this stupid subplot ends here. Cut to Allen Gregory and The Principal on their blackmail date. Yes, she wore the dress he bought her. God willing we won’t find out if she went through with the “nothing underneath” part. Allen Gregory treats the waiter like human garbage because of course he does. Never trust anyone who’s mean to the waiter even if they’re nice to you, but then Allen Gregory is mean to everybody no matter who they are so that’s kind of a moot point. Cut to the fundraiser. Lex Luther is upset about his daughter not letting him use her as a prop. Gary Oak shows up to be a douche. It takes a lot of effort to be more of a douche than Lex Luther, but he almost pulls it off. However, he’s nice to Johnny Football so he’s still not the biggest douche in the room. Cut back to the date. Allen Gregory is still creepy and the situation manages to be uncomfortable without being funny or interesting. Oh God, The Principal is actually starting to find Allen Gregory charming. What the gently caress, why is this show like this? They almost kiss (what. The. gently caress.) but then the Principal stops to take a pill and finds a poem written by her husband in her pill box and decides to go home. Thank God. Johnny Football goes home to have a talk with Asian Meg Griffin. He tells her that even though Lex Luther doesn’t give a poo poo about either of them she should do what Lex Luther wants because otherwise Lex Luther will punish both of them. That’s really what he says. They’re trying really hard to play up the whole “Lex Luther is abusive to his husband and daughter” thing for comedy. Except it isn’t funny. At all. The Principal is walking home, Allen Gregory stalks her by car. Allen Gregory threatens to have her fired, but she’s finally had enough and once again tells him to gently caress off. Gary oak is still a douche, Lex Luther is still more of a douche though. Asian Meg Griffin shows up to enable Lex Luther in his douchiness. Subplot over, gently caress this show. Only one minute left, how awful can it be? Pretty loving awful. See, Allen Gregory told the super intendent that GINA hit him and not the Principal. WHY?! She wasn’t even in this episode, why is she being punished? Why did Allen Gregory tell the super intendent that? He had no reason to do that beyond the fact that he’s evil. And so the super intendant rapes Gina. That’s it. That’s how it all ends. With a rape. Not a rape joke, just a rape. gently caress this show forever. And that’s it, I have now officially watched every awful episode of Allen Gregory. I think it took about seven years off my life (one year per episode), but the terms of my bet have been officially satisfied. From here on in every stupid show I watch will be entirely by choice. Speaking of choice, it’s time for some audience participation! I’m going to let this thread vote on which stupid thing I watch next. The theme of this election is “failed animated FX shows that got cancelled after only one season”. The nominees are: Chozen: Dumbass rapper acts like an rear end in a top hat and treats everyone around him like poo poo. The music was engaging and the animation was good, the writing not so much. It might have improved if it had gotten a second season, but it didn’t. I plan on going through all ten episodes and figuring out what went wrong and why. Moonbeam City: Dumbass detective acts like an rear end in a top hat and treats everyone around him like poo poo. The animation was engaging and the music was good, the writing not so much. It might have improved if it had gotten a second season, but it, uh…. does anyone else have déjà vu for some reason? Unsupervised: This is the third option. I remember basically nothing about it. Cast your votes now! I’ll count them on Wednesday and get started watching whichever one wins.
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Apr 30, 2017 09:19
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BioEnchanted posted:If only there was a vote to watch something good... You deserve a break from this garbage. There are other cartoons Omoly! That's not what this thread is about, bro. Don't worry about me, I survived Allen Gregory. I no longer fear any animated show, or death.
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Apr 30, 2017 10:13
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bunnyofdoom posted:Look at that edit history....apparently Jonah Hill edits the wiki. I’m not surprised, that’s the one of the few people I can think of who would care enough about Allen Gregory to do that. TheRationalRedditor posted:Moonbeam City was dope and mostly funny, so it's an invalid choice. Suffer Well These next few episode reviews are less about suffering and more about figuring out “What went wrong here?”. Chozen/Moonbeam City/Unsupervised (I think) aren’t so much unredeemably bad shows as they are heavily flawed shows that failed to find an audience. I figured nothing could be as bad Allen Gregory, so I picked a few shows that were almost kind of good to follow it up. It’s going to be less of my angry stream of consciousness style rantings and more of me actually trying to think and analyze a show. We’ll see how well that goes. henkman posted:I liked Unsupervised Like I said I remember almost nothing about Unsupervised. Maybe it’s good? Maybe it’s bad? I’d have to rewatch it to know for sure. One thing I do remember, though, is how likeable the main characters were. Like, I distinctly recall thinking “Wow, I’m surprised the writers didn’t just make these characters jerks for the sake a cheap joke. Good for them!” of the choices available it’s the only show were the “Dumbass (protagonist) acts like an rear end in a top hat and treats everyone around (them) like poo poo.” Joke doesn’t work, probably. precision posted:I'd always heard this episode ends on a rape but I've always been too disgusted to find out "in what sense"? Like, does the show... show a loving rape?! The rape is never shown, it’s all just strongly implied in very uncomfortable ways. Here's how it went down: before The Principal is shoved out of the room Gina starts begging “Please don’t leave me alone with him!” and then the door locks and you hear the Super Intendants pants unzip. It’s somehow even less funny than it sounds. Edit: Aw shoot! GobiasIndustries beat me 
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Apr 30, 2017 23:10
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Propaganda Machine posted:I still need to know what sort of bet Omoly had to lose to go through with all this. Regy Rusty posted:If only Omoly were stuck at home and had the time to fill us in Homestuck is webcomic. Maybe you’ve heard of it maybe you haven’t, that’s not important right now. What is important is this: Hivebent. Hivebent is a game made by the same people who made Homestuck. It’s been in production for like five years and has a long and troubled history (I don’t want to bother typing it all up, just google it if you’re curious, shouldn’t be too hard to find). Anyway, I thought the game was finally going to be released last April 13th (Apirl 13th is a significant date in Homestuck lore for various reasons. Again, just google it if you wanna know why) and Clawtopsy (my frenemy over in the Homestuck thread) thought I was a hope filled dumbass for thinking that and decided a bet was in order. I’m quite poor, so instead of betting cash I said I would watch all of Allen Gregory if the game didn’t come out on April 13th and then ed myself to make it official.Long story short, Clawtopsy was right, the game STILL isn’t out, and my dumb hopeful rear end had to watch all of Allen Gregory. Keep in mind this: I made this bet AFTER the creator of the game/comic said the game WASN’T coming out on April 13th. I thought he was playing a prank…I mean, the game was planned for release and greenlit on steam back in JANUARY! If they thought it was almost ready then (they said they just had to debug a few things and that it would only take a few weeks!) surely it would be finished by April, right? RIGHT?!Wrong. Das Boo posted:So OP, I know this isn't a TV show and therefore not a candidate for your voting, but I do hope at some time in the near future you'll watch Foodfight! and chronicle your journey. The masochist in me likes the way you think Das Boo! If I have any fight left in me after rewatching Chozen (because it look like that’s what’s winning right now, although unsupervised is only one vote behind) I might give it a shot. The only problem is that Foodfight is already such a well-known terrible movie, I kind of want experience a lesser known animated abortion. Any sugestions? Also, how do you change a thread title?
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May 2, 2017 05:35
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Pick posted:Ehhh try Unsupervised. SHUPS 4 DETH posted:n'th, i remember really liking that show Well would you look at that! Unsupervised pulls ahead at the last minute! I guess that's what I'm watching next- RandallODim posted:I vote Chozen, because I really want to find out what it was after all these years of the promos living in the deep recesses of my brain. ....well shoot, Chozen and Unsupervised tied. Democracy has failed once again. I guess this means I should do both? I'll start with an episode of Unsupervised, then do and episode of Chozen, and so on and so on until I either finish or get bored. Ammat The Ankh posted:I remember in the Homestuck thread you said you didn't know what The Nutshack was. Now I have never watched the Nutshack, and everything I know about it comes from memes. Anyway you should watch the Nutshack and tell me what it is. Sorry, I'm saving the Nutshack for my next ridiculous bet.
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May 3, 2017 08:03
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