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Goals:  6-month goal - 1/1/2020: 88k in savings 1-year goal: TBD 9-year goal - 6/1/2028: At age 50 have $500k in savings and condo mortgage paid off. Budget: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1U9S6nYMufZWCpBrm6pcgTO8FslA7BncMNOMnJ68pbOE/edit#gid=0 Dashboard: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1U9S6nYMufZWCpBrm6pcgTO8FslA7BncMNOMnJ68pbOE/edit#gid=1829395607 Retirement Calculator: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1U9S6nYMufZWCpBrm6pcgTO8FslA7BncMNOMnJ68pbOE/edit#gid=572923374 History: Thread 1 https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3175682 Thread 2 https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3470495 Thread 3 https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3775446 Thread 4 https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3827922 Stuff the mod added to my OP: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Moneyball posted:Is there any way I can necro the OP? I submitted it a few times on this laptop, so is there a cached version? how do i computers Mod request: If you asked for a gang tag before we had three flavors, please go back and edit your first request for one because I'm going to go through them one by one. There's the double trainwreck, hitting the wall, and 80s style. I'll get my laptop back in a couple days and add them all It's easy to find your post if you filter by your own posts using the ? at the bottom left of one of your posts Options:  Trainwreck ahead! zaurg posted:
Don't believe his lies. (USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST) (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Jul 24, 2017 04:50
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 03:39 |
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Well, at least you're contributing to your retirement, that's good. You're gonna have to lay out your expenses in more detail for anyone here to actually help you, though. Also welcome back! Again!
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Jul 24, 2017 12:47
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Impossible to give any kind of advice unless you give more details. In the meantime, the only thing I can say is "spend less."
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Jul 24, 2017 18:53
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outflows are highly variable which indicates you don't really have, or keep to, a budget of any kind full budget and performance in categories recently please
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Jul 24, 2017 19:00
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Reminder of his previous adventures (May need archives): https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3175682&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1 https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3470495
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Jul 24, 2017 21:47
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Option 1: Make more. Option 2: Spend less.
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Jul 25, 2017 01:34
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Ground. Fucken. Floor.
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Jul 25, 2017 02:43
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Welcome back. Again.
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Jul 25, 2017 02:55
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Correct I haven't followed a budget in... well forever. But certainly not this year. Just looking at the past 3 months. Daughter is changing from private school (9k/year) to public next month. Stab at a budget below to see what I can realistically follow going forward. May: Income $4760, Savings $0, Retirement $290 6%, Expenses $4795 101% Jun: Income $4760, Savings (Emergency Fund) $250 5%, Retirement $290 6%, Expenses $5085 107% 7/24: Income $4954, Savings(Emergency Fund) $250 5%, Retirement $305 6%, Expenses $4355 88% May Housing $1,750 37% Utilities $514 11% Insurance $458 10% Childcare $948 20% Grocery $346 7% Auto $57 1% Misc $196 4% Blow $425 9% Debt $100 2% June Housing $1,750 37% Utilities $369 8% Insurance $458 10% Childcare $995 21% Grocery $476 10% Auto $82 2% Misc $464 10% Blow $391 8% Debt $100 2% July Housing $1,750 35% Utilities $516 7% Insurance $454 9% Childcare $225 5% Grocery $494 10% Auto $40 1% Misc $242 5% Blow $533 11% Debt $100 2% My first stab at updating budget. Need to see if this is realistic Category Monthly Income after taxes $4,900.00 Extra income $50.00 (employer covering cell) total income = $4,950.00 401k Roth $305.00 Emergency Fund Savings $250.00 total savings = $555.00 House mortgage $1,750.00 House insurance escrowed House property tax escrowed Auto Insurance $725 bi-annual Life Insurance $24.00 Health ins me&kids $430.00 Loan repayment $100.00 Electric $150.00 Water $75.00 Internet/TV/Music $70.00 Cell Phone $60.00 Lawn service $80.00 Private school $0.00 (was $750 per month, gone as of June 2017, oldest daughter switching to free public school next month) Childcare/Camps $400.00 (400 avg per month. ~$2k in summer for oldest daughter. ~6k for youngest daughter daycare/VPK. I cover 60%) Auto fuel $60.00 Groceries $500.00 Misc $200.00 Blow $200.00 total income = $4,950.00 total savings = $555.00 total expenses = $4099.00 left over = $296.00
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Jul 25, 2017 03:41
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kill your children and/or go back in time to not have them also you bought more house than you should have on your income you don't need a lawn service, mow that poo poo yourself at least you have your cocaine budget under control
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Jul 25, 2017 03:46
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When you say "blow"...
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Jul 25, 2017 03:47
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I don't do drugs. Blow means like 7/1/17 Blow happy hr 25.20 7/2/17 Blow pizza 27.60 7/9/17 Blow water park 40.06 7/20/17 Blow airbnb 105.00
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Jul 25, 2017 03:50
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Does utilities include cable tv or something because you don't need that or insulate the attic jesus christ
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Jul 25, 2017 03:58
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I lump these together for Utilities category. I don't have cable TV but I pay $10/month for Netflix which goes into the Blow category. Water bill is paid every 2 months and covers water and garbage pickup. Utilities Electric 146.72 Utilities Water 147.33 Utilities AT&T Wireless 91.86 (this goes down to about $57-60 next month) Utilities Comcast Internet 49.99 Utilities Lawn 80.00 So it really works out to about 415 average like this... The $30/month Comcast promotion went away and jumped to 50 so I need to try to get something like that again. Utilities Electric 150 per month Utilities Water 75 per month Utilities AT&T Wireless 60 per month Utilities Comcast Internet 50 per month Utilities Lawn 80 per month
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Jul 25, 2017 04:07
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why does your childcare cost less during summer vacation than during the school year? mow your own lawn why is your water bill so loving high? otherwise i don't know what to tell you besides "make more money" or "don't be a single parent"
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Jul 25, 2017 04:16
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JewKiller 3000 posted:otherwise i don't know what to tell you besides "make more money" or "don't be a single parent" I don't want to pry into E/N territory but can you tell us more about how your ex-wife's contributions relate to your children's care? Also, a little bit about your house -- how many rooms, where do the kids stay, do you have full custody or what? It sounds like you cover 60% of summer camps for your children? What exactly is this 6k/year daycare thing -- is that 10k for summer camp for just her in total then? What does VPK stand for? How much of the health-insurance are you paying, is that 100%? It's also not super clear -- you have two daughters and zero other children, is that right? How old are they? Is the oldest one old enough to mow the lawn for you?
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Jul 25, 2017 04:43
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JewKiller 3000 posted:why does your childcare cost less during summer vacation than during the school year? Childcare costs are all over the place because I was paying $750 month for private school which just stopped. Then summer camp is $225 per week but payments are made irregular. Yeah that is an option. Maybe after summer. I think it works out to about $55 per month for water. Is that high?
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Jul 25, 2017 12:11
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Colin Mockery posted:I don't want to pry into E/N territory but can you tell us more about how your ex-wife's contributions relate to your children's care? Also, a little bit about your house -- how many rooms, where do the kids stay, do you have full custody or what? recent change; before: Kid1 $750/month for private school I pay. Kid1 summer camp fees, split. Kid2 $700/month for preschool/daycare, ex pays. after: Kid1 free public school. Kid1 summer camp fees plus Kid2 $500/month for pre-k - I need to work this out so I'm paying 60%, ex pays 40%. 4 bedroom house, around 2k sq ft, with pool. Kids stay with me 50% of the time. VPK is pre-k. Starts next month. VPK is actually free which covers a preschool class from 9am-12pm, so the cost is just to cover from 12pm-5pm "afterschool"/daycare kinda thing. http://www.vpkhelp.org/ I pay 100% of health insurance for myself and both kids. Yes two kids age 8 and 4.
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Jul 25, 2017 12:21
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so what are your prospects on the "make more money" side of the ledger?
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Jul 25, 2017 13:10
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First of all, I stole the idea of a blow category for my budget after reading your other thread so thank you for that. Second, why are you contributing to a Roth 401k instead of traditional? Do you expect your retirement income to be unusually high compared to today's income? Deferring taxes would ease cash flow a bit. Your auto insurance looks expensive to me but I know that depends a lot on where you live. Shop it around if you haven't recently.
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Jul 25, 2017 14:51
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KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:so what are your prospects on the "make more money" side of the ledger? Sounds like a great idea just not sure how. A guy who works on my team got a second job a few months ago, he leaves job1 and sleeps a couple hours, then works job2 from 11pm-7am, then a little sleep, then back to job1. He looks like a zombie and performance in job1 is suffering. I'm not willing to do something like that.
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Jul 25, 2017 16:02
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401k-Roth, aren't taxes cheaper to pay now? Auto Insurance, thank you. Renewal is coming up in a month. I just sent them an email with a few specific questions and request to provide lower cost options after reviewing my policy. $1450 per year now and I'm the only driver with a good history, I drive a 15 year old car, and do not have collision coverage. Auto Ins is always the same. If I switch providers and save 15-25%, then over the next 2-3 years the cost increases back to what it was even if no changes in policy and no claims. Want to see if I can stick with this one and just lower existing cost.
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Jul 25, 2017 16:22
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A 4br house seems like extreme overkill for a guy with sometimes 2 kids. Besides the cost of the house itself...and also the cost of utilities, having more space tends to mean filling it up with stuff, which itself is $$$. The financially correct move here is to downsize, although honestly if I was in your situation I'm not sure if I would. Mow your own lawn. Insurance sounds high to me but I think I was reflexively thinking of just car insurance but I'm guessing that's home insurance too?
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Jul 25, 2017 16:33
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Housing prices seem to favor downsizing now and that pool is a money pit. Find a smaller house with an HOA pool or marry a high income spouse with two kids. The Zaurge bunch the Zaurge bunch, this is how we became the Zaurge bunch.
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Jul 25, 2017 17:17
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zaurg posted:Sounds like a great idea just not sure how. yeah don't do that but you either need a new job where you make more money or you need some side poo poo that is not too draining where you can make a buck or six. seriously mow your own fuckin lawn except you should downsize and live in a smaller house without the same lawn care reqs.
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Jul 25, 2017 17:48
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zaurg posted:401k-Roth, aren't taxes cheaper to pay now? Switching is a pain but it's like two ten minute calls to save $100+ per year. At least get online quotes from other providers, if you work for a megacorp you probably have corporate discounts at a few places anyway. Roth vs traditional 401k is a topic you could talk about for hours, but let's not. For traditional contributions, the taxes are deferred until you withdraw the money at retirement so you have smaller paycheck deductions now. You pay taxes on Roth contributions immediately, so it's a larger paycheck deduction but it's tax free to spend the money after you retire. Roth is generally good if you have low income now but expect to have higher income in retirement. If your tax rate never changes, they're mathematically a wash. Many people have a lower tax rate in retirement, so it pays to go traditional in that case. You can argue about which is mathematically optimal but your case isn't clear cut either way and you could use the extra cash flow the traditional contributions would leave you with.
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Jul 25, 2017 18:38
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Fair warning to those not used to Zaurg threads: You will waste lots of time trying to help, but nothing will happen except what Zaurg already wants to do. He claims to want the help and to appreciate the advice, but his actions will leave you exasperated and dumbstruck. That said, I do wish you the best of luck, Zaurg. But past performance is a pretty good indicator of future success in this realm.
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Jul 25, 2017 19:07
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Virtual Masochism is a thing. "They are right, they are right! I am stupid! I am a piece of poo poo! Die!" Then goes for a swim before taking the kids to a top-tier summer camp. Do I have this right?
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Jul 25, 2017 19:15
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Ixian posted:Virtual Masochism is a thing. Right on the money. He'll see the light, claim he's on the path, then something shiny will come along or he'll knock up his ex-wife and we'll be right back at "we told you not to do these things!"
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Jul 25, 2017 19:24
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Nocheez posted:Right on the money. He'll see the light, claim he's on the path, then something shiny will come along or he'll knock up his ex-wife and we'll be right back at "we told you not to do these things!" I mean to be fair he didn't knock up his ex wife
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Jul 25, 2017 20:18
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Veskit posted:I mean to be fair he didn't knock up his ex wife If history is taken into account I don't know that we should eliminate that as a possibility though?.....
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Jul 25, 2017 22:00
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Nocheez posted:Fair warning to those not used to Zaurg threads: You will waste lots of time trying to help, but nothing will happen except what Zaurg already wants to do. He claims to want the help and to appreciate the advice, but his actions will leave you exasperated and dumbstruck. 
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Jul 26, 2017 10:09
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Zaurg is this the house your then-wife made you buy during one of the last threads? If so why do you still have it?
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Jul 26, 2017 13:20
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House prices are holding up pretty well right now, you could probably sell it and come out ahead.
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Jul 26, 2017 14:05
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Cicero posted:Eh at least half the problem before was that he was married to a woman who was even less open to actually changing than zaurg. Or at least it seemed that way. So, maybe this time it'll be different! Maybe. I'll still bookmark the thread and follow it. I just won't waste any more keystrokes after this period.
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Jul 26, 2017 14:07
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Cicero posted:Eh at least half the problem before was that he was married to a woman who was even less open to actually changing than zaurg. Or at least it seemed that way. So, maybe this time it'll be different! Don't you remember the last time he said this time it'll be different? https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3775446
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Jul 26, 2017 15:14
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Orthodox Rabbit posted:Zaurg is this the house your then-wife made you buy during one of the last threads? If so why do you still have it? I don't understand the question, why do I still have a home?
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Jul 26, 2017 16:42
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zaurg posted:I don't understand the question, why do I still have a home? why didn't you sell it and move bro
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Jul 26, 2017 16:44
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No Butt Stuff posted:House prices are holding up pretty well right now, you could probably sell it and come out ahead. Would come out with somewhere around 40-50k. I just need to think about what I'd do then. Definitely not an easy decision. We like it here, like the house, the neighborhood, the location. Just registered daughter for local public school. Where would I move to find significant savings from my current housing related expenses, that is what I need to evaluate
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Jul 26, 2017 16:47
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 03:39 |
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zaurg posted:Just registered daughter for local public school. Where would I move to find significant savings from my current housing related expenses, that is what I need to evaluate Look at what areas the school serves on a map or real estate website, then find a house that is smaller/cheaper that still meets your needs. Just browse on your lunch break, it isn't hard to start.
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Jul 26, 2017 17:03
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