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Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Jerusalem posted:

I fear we'll never quite reach the heights of batshit insanity that April brought us... but then I remember this is UFC and at some point some crazy poo poo is gonna go down again.

What was the last really crazy month before that? I was probably Jon Jones doing something stupid.

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Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Memento posted:

August last year there was like eight pages of just pure stream-of-consciousness reaction to him pissing hot.

Now I remember. It was simultaneously the most shocking thing and the least surprising thing.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Matt Lindland posted:

Please take it to the B league thread, Mrs. Sonnenburg is not under UFC contract.

UFC champion of our hearts forever, though.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Jerusalem posted:

You know, after Chael beat Anderson Silva in every single one of their matches, as well as going undefeated his entire UFC career*, I guess there reall was nothing left to do but go to Bellator.

* Source: Chael Sonnen.

It's true, every time Chael fought in the UFC, Andy would have to come out and get beaten by him again as a sub-match.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Memento posted:

OK that answers my question as to how an unranked nobody got sanctioned in a fight against GGG.

Because boxing is the clear ranking system of Pride mixed with the matchmaking of current Bellator.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

El Roncho posted:

Didn't people used to say GSP wasn't all that big of a welter in his prime? I guess it's feasible he could make 155 but I'd still be shocked as hell to see it.

Of the guys he fought for the title at welterweight, all of them were either taller or visibly more muscular. It's debatable whether he was smaller than average, but he wasn't an exceptionally large guy for the division.

BJ Penn throws off these averages, however.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Neurosis posted:

People actually said he was small which I never understood unless your points of comparison are just peak Thiago Alves and roided to the gills Johny Hendricks

Or Jon Fitch, or Carlos Condit, or Nick Diaz. Hughes and Sherk were both carrying more muscle, even if they were shorter. The only exceptions were Penn and Serra.

Again, definitively saying he's small might be a little much, but he's not big for the division

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

tesilential posted:

Lol nope. GSP was also bigger (mass wise) than Condit, Diaz, koscheck, hardy, and probably many more. At the time guys like Luigi fiorivani were solid size WW and plenty of chubby lightweights populates the top 20.

He was never the biggest but he’s not undersized against any WW.

You're probably right on Hardy, but Koscheck walks around at 192 according to him, while GSP walks around at 185 (again, according to him), and Condit and Diaz both have to stay really loving lean to be able to fight at Welter because both of them have much larger frames than GSP. Condit is loving 6'2.

Yes, all of them technically fit at the division, but the effort is clearly going to be harder for some than others, and GSP isn't one of them.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
Hendo might not be the best, but he is the greatest. As true now as it ever was.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
Guida was cool when he was losing fun fights where he got hit a lot. I feel like that doesn't happen enough anymore since someone told him what 'gameplanning' is.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
Why the gently caress are people here taking the side of management against labour? gently caress is wrong with you idiots.

tesilential posted:

Huh? He gets paid more than BJ penn did, a popular champion who people actually paid to watch and generated revenue for the company.

I’m not one to jump in and call pro fighters midgets or anything, but being the 125 champ is like being the best basketball player under 6’ or the fastest chihuahua or something.

BJ Penn was personally worth 30 million dollars halfway through his MMA career, so I'm pretty sure that's not true.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

El Roncho posted:

BJ was stinking rich before he ever set foot in a cage.

No, his family was stinking rich. He personally became worth 30 million as a result of his career. He's probably been pretty smart with his money, but he's been extremely well paid for his work.

tesilential posted:

The frustrating thing as a fan is that, dude you have a nice contract and get paid well to fight nobodies, the one time we ask you to earn your salary and put on a fight we actually want to watch, you want triple. gently caress off

Yes, the time he's going to have a fight that will likely make his bosses more money, he also wants to make more money. Is this tricky for you?

I'm also unclear on how everyone has concluded that a fight with TJ is going to be some huge money maker. TJ isn't a needle mover either.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

it's the biggest fight they could make involving DJ right now, and kind of the rule of MMA match making is to make the biggest fight possible happen now, not later.

It's also the rule that if you want the guy to take the bigger, riskier, more profitable fight, you pay him more.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Skip My Posts posted:

No it isn’t or they’d be renegotiating every single fight and it would go the other way as well lol

Then why would any fighter ever take a risky fight that could make the company more money? Generosity to their employers? The abstract concept of the challenge? Do you think people get excited about fighting Brock or Conor because they're excited about how well the UFC is going to do?

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

From like a year ago, which is how long DJ has been dragging his feet:




Pretend I can find that long quote of Mighty Mouse explaining his side.

Also, pretend you only just realised the idea of taking Dana White at face value is absurd.

The whole saga is dumb as poo poo. At the time, Bisping was refusing to fight anyone, Woodley would not stop complaining, Conor wasn't even in the sport, Cyborg thought she wasn't being supported in a division they made for her, but somehow it's MM who gets thrown under the bus for ducking someone who's not even in his weight class.

david carmichael posted:

I hope the russia card is like the brazilian cards or european cards where it is garbage nobody locals getting smashed by b league foreigners

I remember UFC 134 was planned out to give the Brazilian fans lots of wins. And Luis Cane was the only Brazilian to lose to a foreigner on the whole card, and he did it in the most spectacularly embarrassing way, trying to climb the fence as he got knocked out.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

tesilential posted:

MM gets X to fight contenders to his belt and when the contender is really lovely, they don’t pay less, they honor the contract. When MM finally has a challenge again he wants to hardball for a gigantic raise. If they were asking him to go up to BW, I’d say he deserves the 2 mil he wants, but he shouldn’t demand Conor’s opponent money to fight anyone with a name in his own weight class.

Yeah. They don't pay less than the contract because that's a bad thing to do. Paying more is a good thing to do.

Again, you're arguing in favour of management over labour.

TJ isn't in his weight class and has never been in his weight class. He wrestled at 133 pounds 10 years ago.

He absolutely should demand more money to fight someone who's far more dangerous than anyone he's faced and, more importantly, would be a far easier fight to promote than any of his other fights that they refused to promote.

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

like getting TJ's full purse if he didn't make weight or something.

I'm pretty sure that was something that TJ actually offered to do himself.

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

Also I'm pretty sure we laughed at this part

I don't know why you would. They don't promote him. That's something that's observably true. In fact, they don't promote him and publicly poo poo on his drawing ability, something that they can personally effect, in a 'we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas' type scenario.

Also, I only just realised the absurdity of White going 'he doesn't sell PPVs, he's really bad at it. Seriously, no one buys his PPVs. Also, we offered him PPV points and this didn't immediately break the negotiating deadlock, clearly it is him who is being insane.

Skip My Posts posted:

Do you have Down syndrome ?

No. Now answer my question.

Snowman_McK fucked around with this message at 04:19 on May 17, 2018

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Skip My Posts posted:

What question lol. Everything you say is retarded and contradicts itself

Turn your monitor on.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Fat Twitter Man posted:

can you tell us more about your warhammer fan fiction

I wish. I got the title from, I think, D and D, in the Trump thread. But I don't know what it refers to. As far as I'm aware, I've not written any.

EDIT: I'm happy to drop the Mighty Mouse thing since we've done all this before and no one's moved.

What's the funniest UFC/MMA fight?

Snowman_McK fucked around with this message at 04:33 on May 17, 2018

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

LobsterMobster posted:

ufc is maybe palelei vs krylov?

i really like this non-ufc fight:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjDnxKRtb0s

This is a loving pro-click. I'd never seen any SFL before, but remembered their terrible theme song. That absolutely lived up to the theme song.

...and the pitch! posted:

Keith Hackney punishing Joe Son's balls is pretty funny. The headlock is maybe not the greatest grappling move. Plus if I recall correctly Joe Son carries a cross to the ring.

Kimo used to do it too, and Joe Son was his team mate in the early days.

Memento posted:

edit: both of these are from the point of view of not just the fight but the fallout and fan reaction. You could grit every single road in the Pacific Northwest all winter with the salt from Fedor fans after Hendo dropped him on his head.

The idea that it was stopped early set in really quickly, not helped by the fact that the camera cut back to Fedor after he'd more or less recovered, while someone's camera phone caught him struggling to his feet like a baby giraffe.

My submission is Overeem Browne. It's just such a perfect Overeem fight. He demonstrates how much better he is in the opening seconds while Browne just kind of spazzes out. Then he gasses, Browne keeps spazzing, throwing the Lisa Simpson kick, and finally gets it. Overeem just sits down with the acceptance of defeat we've come to expect from him, Browne runs in to finish him, but is so tall and unco that his head takes a moment to catch up with his legs. It's just perfect.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
I like that the real thing was more ridiculous than the version of it in that Kevin James movie.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Untrustable posted:

My brother was in prison for 9 years and told me he would microwave baby oil and put it on the floor of his cell except for the place he was standing. He'd then call out someone in the common area and when they came running in they'd slip and slide and he, standing in the only dry spot, would just pummel them while they tried to gain traction. That's the best base for MMA.

That's one of the best things I've ever heard.

Why was he pummelling these dudes?

Also, having conquered the Welterweight division and stand up comedy, Tyrone Woodley is in the upcoming lovely action movie 'Escape Plan 2' a sequel to a movie no one watched.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Bluedeanie posted:

Ariel survived multiple Rampage interviews when he first started, Chael isnt gonna phase him when hes seasoned

I think, if anything, Ariel's fragility has gotten worse as he's sort of convinced himself that he actually matters.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Dr. Abysmal posted:

Kongo and Yvel flowing from one technique to another.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Het_y1KL1ws

has there been anyone with a worse ratio for looking like a badass V. actually fighting than Kongo? I remember when I started watching, I remember assuming he would be good, or at least competent at throwing punches.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
This is the best loving thread.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
I'm pretty sure Tim Kennedy has some legit mental health issues. He may also be an rear end in a top hat, though.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010
I'm annoyed at Perry for trying to steal Cody's title as 'dumbest punchman' but you have to admire the gusto that he's going at it with.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Foul Fowl posted:

fight pass is really good if you never watch anything live. you can just binge like holloway's last five fights in the same time it takes to watch a full card.

Can verify that this is an excellent use of time. Holloway vs. Ortega is going to loving own bones.

MotU posted:

would require someone to be a huge fan of luke rockhold tho

It's possible that Luke Rockhold himself might come into the store.

Though now I'm worried that Rockhold might have managed to lose himself as a fan.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Dangersim posted:

Ya wasn't that the one with jds/hunt on it

Nah, it was JDS/Mir, UFC 146.

It was actually a pretty fun card, especially in retrospect. Stipe struggled with Shane Del Rosario (rip) for a round, Struve actually pulled off a pretty cool submission, Roy Nelson effortlessly knocked some dude out. Bigfoot was in the co-main and Cain murdered him, and Mir actually looked okay until being killed by the prettiest straight right JDS has ever thrown.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

TheRationalRedditor posted:

still can't believe that he turned it around so long after establishing himself as the permanent MW gatekeeper / false callout decoy for fighters from the "can't talk good and want to learn how to read better" institute

It's impressive that scoring one decent win against a relevant opponent absolutely qualifies as turning it around for Michael Bisping, who once had to cheat against Jorge Rivera, who I promise exists.

chaleski posted:

Yeah I can't even remember the last time I heard anything interesting happen in one, did they ever give a reason why they stopped doing them?

I remember it started with Conor. They gave him his own press thing after 194. Then they thought it would work for non-Conor people. It doesn't.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

El Roncho posted:

Some people just can't understand why being a rude oval office is so god drat funny.

I don't mind him being a cockhead, it's his astonishingly thin skin that actually annoys me. The old adage that if you can't take it, don't dish it out.

Josuke Higashikata posted:

I just wanna know why Luke Rockhold registered on this dead forum under the pseudonym Snowman_McK

Being a model/fighter was getting dull, and it was this or learn boxing defence.


Disgusting Coward posted:

It is possible to enjoy the rude oval office and also acknowledge that he had to cheat to beat a 500 year old Jorge Rivera, squeaked by a head hosed Denis Kang and was killed 5 times in a row by the zombie remains of 50% of Dan Henderson.

Don't forget getting outboxed by Matt Hammil.


Soothing Vapors posted:

imagine not loving michael bisping

shameful

Hey, I'm happy for him. He managed an actual win over someone who actually mattered at the time he beat him, having failed to do that during the entire rest of his career. He legitimately did turn it around and got his one relevant win.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

Every time I hear about an MMA or other sports star branching out into some weird, unrelated field, I secretly hope they turn out to be really good at it. Publicly, I laugh at them so I can be in on the joke when the person bombs and looks like a dumb stupid idiot no-talent hack at their new vocation.

Are there any MMA fighters/musicians? It's pretty common for actors to have a crack at music making, but I can't think of any fighters.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Wise Learned Man posted:

You don't count DJ Mikey B?

I never count him for anything in any way.

Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Mr. Nice! posted:

Rich Franklin had his arm broken by Chuck Liddell 1 minute into their match and he still won by knockout. :colbert:

didn't Randy Couture get his arm broken against Gonzaga? Lank McCulloch is just making excuses

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

loving lol. Classic Yoel. Loel Romero.

It's like Saints Row 3 in real life.

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Snowman_McK
Jan 31, 2010

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

I didn't play it, so I am just going to assume it's absolutely rife with dick-punching.

It was the primary reason to play the game. Then in number 4 they introduced super powered dick punches and kicks. It's a pretty good game. It's like if GTA was actually fun to play.

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