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CRUSTY MINGE posted:Bigfoot is a messenger and keeps tabs on us for the aliens. He hangs out, takes notes, then alerts the aliens to our activities from his hidden Canadian pyramid buried under a forest. lmao people really will believe anything they are taught in school. the big feet are on our side sheeple.
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May 22, 2020 23:02
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BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:lmao people really will believe anything they are taught in school. Their pyramids were co-opted as alien landing platforms, however.
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May 22, 2020 23:03
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May 22, 2020 23:21
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May 22, 2020 23:21
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S C A R Y
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May 22, 2020 23:54
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If a bigfoot could fly he would be a ufo
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May 23, 2020 00:47
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Big foot is the only thing stopping the invasion, If rednecks hunt all the bigfeet to extinction we're all doomed.
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May 23, 2020 03:38
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There's more evidence of Bigfoot than Jesus, far as I'm concerned. When's the last time you heard someone talking about a Jesus sighting? Let alone reports on six continents? Jesus has a couple of chapters in one book about him doing poo poo 2000 years ago, people are still seeing Bigfoots all over the drat place and new books and documentaries are coming out all the time about his squatchiness. Harry and the Hendersons is a true story.
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May 23, 2020 03:50
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everyone's always tossing around big foot this and big foot that, but you know what I'm left wondering? just how big are those feet. heck I could be a big foot and not even know it
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May 23, 2020 04:16
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Obv Bigfoot fucks but there's no chance he's straight.
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May 23, 2020 04:18
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BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:
I read this whole thing. The guy makes some prettty big jumps in ideas lol
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May 23, 2020 06:21
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Screama posted:I read this whole thing. The guy makes some prettty big jumps in ideas lol Hey if I see anything I can't immediately identify it's aliens and I will die on that hill.
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May 23, 2020 07:43
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'Radioactive Siberian bells' is a new one to me.
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Jul 18, 2020 00:04
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OMFG FURRY posted:just look at human history and how technologically advanced cultures interacted with 'new world' peoples. the very last thing anyone would, or should, do is give us advanced technology. We are not an interstellar civilization though, for quite plausibly that same reason. One assumes any civilization that achieves interstellar travel does so by getting around societal problems such as "more money for us/gently caress you".
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Jul 18, 2020 01:15
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I hope the aliens just kidnap some of us to put in a zoo
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Jul 18, 2020 01:19
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I volunteer to live in an alien zoo, there'd be no appreciable difference from my life as it currently exists, so long as they got video games and porn.
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Jul 18, 2020 01:22
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And when the human race will destroy itself they'll try breeding you in captivity  Really it's win win all around!
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Jul 18, 2020 01:24
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anyone ever seen a strange harvest. some nights i just get lost staring up at the stars wishing an alien would use a laser beam to burn out my rear end in a top hat . . . sigh
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Jul 18, 2020 01:27
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Nastyman posted:We are not an interstellar civilization though, for quite plausibly that same reason. One assumes any civilization that achieves interstellar travel does so by getting around societal problems such as "more money for us/gently caress you". If you don't have FTL any alien contact is probably gonna be peaceful just because it takes too long and is too expensive to have interstellar trade, nevermind interstellar war. And any species capable of building ships that survive interstellar journeys doesn't need planets to colonize, they can build durable self-sufficient space habitats. Basically the only use of interstellar travel is pranks. You find less developed species and do butt stuff to them.
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Jul 18, 2020 01:27
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Honestly, I'm hoping they do that before the human race is completely destroyed. Interstellar species know about genetic diversity.  The captive breeding, not the butt stuff. Thread sure moves fast!
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Jul 18, 2020 01:28
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I for one hope that the aliens send a relativistic butt probe our way the moment they hear any of our radio signals
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Jul 18, 2020 01:28
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I was abducted but the aliens took one look at my rear end and noped out. We shook hands and they apologized for the inconvenience.
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Jul 18, 2020 04:57
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My sleep paralysis episodes are always the same: An invisible entity walks up the stairs to my room, always just around the corner, coming to "get" me, but never actually making it into the room. Just foot steps coming for me and I try to move or wake up but can't so I just relax and accept my pending doom. Usually that does the trick and I wake up. Could be worse I guess.
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Jul 18, 2020 05:04
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Icochet posted:I was abducted but the aliens took one look at my rear end and noped out. We shook hands and they apologized for the inconvenience. if they grab you again and you happen to see a butthole boring laser please grab it for me. its for my operation. im very sick.
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Jul 18, 2020 05:08
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Nastyman posted:We are not an interstellar civilization though, for quite plausibly that same reason. One assumes any civilization that achieves interstellar travel does so by getting around societal problems such as "more money for us/gently caress you". Our greed is directly tied to our thirst for discovery. Most of the things that we consider bad traits are often both our weaknesses and strengths as a species. The fact that we aggressively seek out new territory is probably a good indicator that we will be a space-faring civilization.
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Jul 18, 2020 05:18
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the fleshlight was introduced about 50 years after roswell. coincidence? how many other gently caress devices did you get from the greys, DARPA?
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Jul 18, 2020 05:21
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R.L. Stine posted:the fleshlight was introduced about 50 years after roswell. coincidence? how many other gently caress devices did you get from the greys, DARPA? i read in The Day After Roswell by lt. gen. corso that the pentagon office of foreign technology was directly responsible for selling the flesh light technology found in the crashed ufo to steve shubin of interactive life forms.
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Jul 18, 2020 05:49
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I wonder if it would be possible to "reverse engineer" what kind of firepower alien invaders would actually have by thinking about the attributes of a generic flying saucer-kinda vehicle. It's interesting enough to think what kind of phenomena a flying saucer could/would exploit to function. Gravity field manipulation? Extremely advanced thruster propulsion with incredibly strong energy sources?
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Jul 18, 2020 10:35
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"Aliens" aka angels aka the annunaki aka the nephelim aka the greys don't believe in the theory of gravity and UFOs are held aloft by gods perfect love.
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Jul 18, 2020 10:47
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To reason scientifically in terms of alien weaponry, we must take into account known facts of alien technology: 1. Antigravity (cow abductions, ufos) 2. Memory manipulation (hazy memories, repressed memories) 3. Anal (probes) What we can then deduct is that alien weaponry would most likely be a tractor beam which manipulates your memory and your anal.
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Jul 18, 2020 11:00
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1. Cow abductions are, on balance of the evidence most likely angels offering sacrifices to the lord. 2. Being in the direct presence of angels of the lord overwhelms the senses and accounts for peoples fuzzy or incomplete memories. 3. rear end in a top hat loophole. We don't need to deduce anything scripture already tells us that angels use flaming swords.
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Jul 18, 2020 11:07
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Tarkus posted:Our greed is directly tied to our thirst for discovery. Most of the things that we consider bad traits are often both our weaknesses and strengths as a species. The fact that we aggressively seek out new territory is probably a good indicator that we will be a space-faring civilization. lol
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Jul 18, 2020 12:11
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Interdimensional Infrasound Bigfoot is my favorite theory, and has the added bonus of being correct
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Jul 18, 2020 19:01
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Tarkus posted:Our greed is directly tied to our thirst for discovery. Most of the things that we consider bad traits are often both our weaknesses and strengths as a species. The fact that we aggressively seek out new territory is probably a good indicator that we will be a space-faring civilization. I suspect that, to put this in Star Trek™️®terms, Humans have a lot more in common with the Klingons®™️ than the Vulcans™️® Star Trek™️® is a wholly owned subsidiary of Walt Disney®™️ incorporated copyright ©2020 all right reserved
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Jul 18, 2020 20:22
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This is why we need one world government. We'll never get invited into the galactic council without one
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Jul 18, 2020 20:41
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sharknado slashfic posted:Interdimensional Infrasound Bigfoot is my favorite theory, and has the added bonus of being correct ....tell me everything you know about interdimensional infrasound bigfoot.
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Jul 18, 2020 20:47
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BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:....tell me everything you know about interdimensional infrasound bigfoot. if you're in the woods it's already too late
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Jul 18, 2020 20:53
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BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:....tell me everything you know about interdimensional infrasound bigfoot. The reason there's no physical evidence of bigfoot is that they don't live in this dimension and only travel here, and the reason some people feel uneasy in the forest with nothing around is because bigfeet can project infrasound which you can't hear but makes you feel physically wrong as a warning to stay away.
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Jul 18, 2020 20:54
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hemale in pain posted:if you're in the woods it's already too late its me im the bogfoot. its my gfs dads birthday and im gonna give him my (pristine) copy of exo politics because its a fun read and he doesnt believe in the corona virus and could probably use some easy alien reading
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Jul 18, 2020 21:09
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hemale in pain posted:if you're in the woods it's already too late it’s a shame what happened to ‘drew
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Jul 18, 2020 22:09
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