Scurrying into the parking garage and trying to hide my face in the shadows really quickly when they come early
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:10 |
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# ? Apr 26, 2024 15:02 |
i cant do a low voice long enough and have to ask them for a water bottle
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:11 |
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Be sure to avoid all cameras and surveillance satellites on the route. That's how they got my brother.
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:12 |
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Waiting in a dark corner of a parking garage for deep throat
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:13 |
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never
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:14 |
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the only fed i'll talk to is K Fed
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:14 |
if i dont talk, they tell me I'll never see my forum again..
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:16 |
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turning off location access so no one knows im at the feds
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:22 |
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in a shadowy corner I pop the collar of my long jacket and do a nervous fart
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:24 |
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Trying to seem cool by smoking cigarettes, breaking out in loud coughs
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:26 |
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Explaining all my crimes to them so I can’t be double jeopardized
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:27 |
ASenileAnimal posted:turning off location access so no one knows im at the feds getting hosed up and killed because my snap story with agent fredrick wasnt on private
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:29 |
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Shuffling through my magic cards looking for a cool alias for them to call me
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:32 |
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I deep throat the federal agent cocks lovingly before giving testimony. Pretty sure I heard someone did that back in the 60s and the whole thing worked out well
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:33 |
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being embarrassed to lift up my shirt so the agent can put the wire on me cause i have a poor body image. maybe after i work out for a couple months i can come back and do this...
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:36 |
Agent Wilcox: what do you know about the dirty bomb Me: buddy you don't know what the hell you're walking into
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:38 |
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Darkman Fanpage posted:being embarrassed to lift up my shirt so the agent can put the wire on me cause i have a poor body image. maybe after i work out for a couple months i can come back and do this... cant even stick the wire on cause the skin is too oily
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:41 |
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I'M JUST A SPOKE IN THE WHEEL!!!!
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:53 |
they aren't responding to my texts the same way they used to... Might dm the CIA
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 19:57 |
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You got a warrant, pal? No? gently caress outa here
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 20:14 |
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Look buddy, I just want my package, I know for a fact they didn't ring the doorbell cause I was right inside! What?? I swear, I'm gonna come over there and-huh? *doublechecks phonebook* Uh, sorry, have a good one
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 20:20 |
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wearing one of those big novelty flowers on my jacket to fool the mafia. the real wire is in my rear end.
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 20:24 |
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Chinatown posted:never That's right. Snitches ain't poo poo.
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 20:28 |
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It's worth keeping in mind that you can still be tracked via the gps in your phone even if the phone is shut off so you should wrap every electronics you own in tin foil (nature's faraday cage)
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 20:53 |
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*is named Jimmy the <insert animal, mineral, or inanimate object>*
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 20:57 |
blatman posted:It's worth keeping in mind that you can still be tracked via the gps in your phone even if the phone is shut off so you should wrap every electronics you own in tin foil (nature's faraday cage) nice tip op, but the feds got me covered
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 21:11 |
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*sneaks you all the good posts* vv I just think they're funny.
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 21:14 |
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*Is basically Brad Pitt in Burn After Reading but way uglier*
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 22:53 |
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Since Deepthroat has already been taken as a famous alias I'm gonna go with either Tiddykisser or ButtTheShitmanFart.
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 23:56 |
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I'm talking to the feds they took out a restraining order against me but nothing will stand between me and talking to the feds held hostage in a standstill of a long line of vehicles in the McDonalds drivethru
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 23:57 |
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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:I'm talking to the feds they took out a restraining order against me but nothing will stand between me and talking to the feds held hostage in a standstill of a long line of vehicles in the McDonalds drivethru I'm standing in front of a tied up federal agent who's sobbing and repeatedly going "No, don't, please stop". I take in a giant deep breath. DEAD I AM THE ONE, EXTERMINATING SO-
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# ? Jan 9, 2020 23:59 |
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Talking’ to the Federales. They could have had him any day.
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 00:36 |
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Caro is sitting in heaven, or possibly a Syrian prison, right now, shaking his head in disappointment at this thread rn
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 00:53 |
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sticksy posted:Caro is sitting in heaven, or possibly a Syrian prison, right now, shaking his head in disappointment at this thread rn Caro came home dude
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 00:57 |
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You spooks ain’t gettin nothin outta me!!!! *is Tekashi 6ix9ine*
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 02:09 |
Ive sold out hundreds of hardened criminals with sigmed affidavits and witness testimonies
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 02:10 |
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Honky Dong Country posted:Caro came home dude That’s what the Feds want us to believe. Classic Fed move, duh.
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 02:16 |
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Seizon posted:if i dont talk, they tell me I'll never see my forum again.. Your forum is already dead. And gay.
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 02:42 |
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Mozi posted:the only fed i'll talk to is K Fed
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 02:46 |
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# ? Apr 26, 2024 15:02 |
1redflag posted:Your forum is already dead. And gay. Thats the price u have to pay to see justice
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# ? Jan 10, 2020 02:49 |