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Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
Chess Rules

You can't just be up there and just doin' chess like that.

1a. Chess is when you

1b. Okay well listen. Chess is when you move the

1c. Let me start over

1c-a. The white player is not allowed to do a motion to the, uh, black player, that prohibits the black player from doing, you know, just trying to move the piece. You can't do that.

1c-b. Once the white player is in the movement, he can't be over here and say to the other pieces, like, "I'm gonna get ya! I'm gonna tag you out! You better watch your butt!" and then just be like he didn't even do that.

1c-b(1). Like, if you're about to move and then don't move, you have to still move. You cannot not move. Does that make any sense?

1c-b(2). You gotta be, motion of moving of the piece, and then, until you just move it.

1c-b(2)-a. Okay, well, you can have the piece up here, like this, but then there's the move you gotta think about.

1c-b(2)-b. Fairuza Balk hasn't been in any movies in forever. I hope she wasn't typecast as that racist lady in American History X.

1c-b(2)-b(i). Oh wait, she was in The Waterboy too! That would be even worse.

1c-b(2)-b(ii). "get in mah bellah" -- Adam Water, "The Waterboy." Haha, classic...

1c-b(3). Okay seriously though. Chess is when the white player makes a movement that, as determined by, when you do a move involving the pieces and field of

Do not do a chess please

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Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
(The above is copypasta I am not that clever. It's a game for kings and I am more of a common man myself.)

barnold


what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot
im gonna do it op. im gonna balk.


Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
The game has an actual strategy called the "bong cloud" opening. How is that not the official game of the blue forum?

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Bright Bart posted:

The game has an actual strategy called the "bong cloud" opening. How is that not the official game of the blue forum?

show me you are bomb cloud sir. I want a chess opponent.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ChessByPostFree

I'm ancientaroma79. Come at me all at once if u date byob. I'm basically the bobby fisher of playing Chest and huffing glue :crow:





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

Areola Grande posted:

I'm ancientaroma79. Come at me all at once if u date byob. I'm basically the bobby fisher of playing Chest and huffing glue :crow:

Sorry my AG. Everyone knows that huffing increases your skill so you're basically a performance enhancing cheater.

Khanstant
im really good at chess and have been writing chess guides eve nsupercomputers refernece for chess tips in serious chess races

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs

Bright Bart posted:

Sorry my AG. Everyone knows that huffing increases your skill so you're basically a performance enhancing cheater.

:batuka:

Areola Grande

it's a free country u pervs
:abrathink:
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ChessByPostFree

:) let's gently caress this up already the yob





spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
My favorite part of playing chess aside from Anya Taylor Joy is of course flipping the table over in rage when I lose

Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

My favorite part of playing chess aside from Anya Taylor Joy is of course flipping the table over in rage when I lose

Flipping the table over in a rage when you win is a time honored tradition in chess.

Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
Online games kinda make this harder but you can always DOS the server.

Twenty Four


Bright Bart posted:

Chess Rules

You can't just be up there and just doin' chess like that.


loving lol it took me exactly that long to know it was a riff off of the Jon Bois baseball balk explanation

I now think this needs to be done to more things

Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.
You are technically allowed to stack pieces on top of each other, but due to how they are shaped it is physically impossible.

your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)



there were several of us on lichess, I recommend it


Join the BYOB Army


thank you again Saoshyant!!

your friend sk

(ヤイケス!)


if you want this thread in real life, check out 5D Chess on steam. includes travel across parallel dimensions and time travel. that would be a WILD byob chess night


Join the BYOB Army


thank you again Saoshyant!!

Escape From Noise

Okay. But when do we box?

Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.
Prebake your crust.

Macnult

chess is turn-based, meaning that whoever moves first has the advantage. always make sure you move before your opponent, regardless of what side you’re on

Escape From Noise

Macnult posted:

chess is turn-based, meaning that whoever moves first has the advantage. always make sure you move before your opponent, regardless of what side you’re on

Going full David Byrne in the Once In a Lifetime video at the chess tournament.

Tomfoolery

White to move. Be loving Awesome. Hells To The Yeah

Tomfoolery

In This Puzzle, The Horsies Make A Big H

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Tomfoolery posted:

White to move. Be loving Awesome. Hells To The Yeah



I use the Cherenkov Gambit wherein I irradiate my opponent with a thermonuclear blast.

Manifisto


master chess is about the moves you DON'T make

in this sense (and this sense only) I am a grandmaster


ty nesamdoom!

Barco Fiesta




a fantasy of olives
it's an actual rule in tournament chess that you are allowed to propose a draw whenever, and as often, as you like. proposing a draw every five seconds is the most popular form of poo poo-talking in tournament chess.

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Barco Fiesta posted:

it's an actual rule in tournament chess that you are allowed to propose a draw whenever, and as often, as you like. proposing a draw every five seconds is the most popular form of poo poo-talking in tournament chess.

Ass-penny

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

I use the Cherenkov Gambit wherein I irradiate my opponent with a thermonuclear blast.



thank you so much to nesamdoom for the scurry fall sig!

(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ #YesNutNovember - add this to your sig if you love and support BYOB's own nut

Ass-penny

The game of chess is like a sword fight, you must think first, before you move.


thank you so much to nesamdoom for the scurry fall sig!

(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ #YesNutNovember - add this to your sig if you love and support BYOB's own nut

Barco Fiesta




a fantasy of olives

rear end-penny posted:

The game of chess is like a sword fight, you must think first, before you move.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5WJOPeWczM

Bright Bart

False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
If you don't slap your opponent on the butt after they defeat you it's considered a double loss for ranking purposes.

Goons Are Gifts

sorry I thought this is the rules of cheese threads now I'm confused


pecan

the drools of chess

Escape From Noise

rear end-penny posted:

The game of chess is like a sword fight, you must think first, before you move.

Very well. I'll let you try my Wu-Tang style.

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Escape From Noise posted:

Very well. I'll let you try my Wu-Tang style.

The goal of chess is to protect ya neck, kid

Ass-penny

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

The goal of chess is to protect ya neck, kid

Ain't a drat thing changed, yo

:baduk:

Bilirubin

The sanctioned action is to CHUG


*Kramers into the thread*

Oh has anybody told you about the en passant rule yet? Because whoo boy, let me tell you, that's real!


OMGVBFLOL posted:

if you have the money and the patience, you can Hello Kitty anything

Thank you deep dish peat moss!
Bilirubin

The sanctioned action is to CHUG


Escape From Noise posted:

Very well. I'll let you try my Wu-Tang style.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJk0p-98Xzc


OMGVBFLOL posted:

if you have the money and the patience, you can Hello Kitty anything

Thank you deep dish peat moss!
Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.
Prawns do not move diagonally to take a piece

Twenty Four


Manifisto posted:

master chess is about the moves you DON'T make

in this sense (and this sense only) I am a grandmaster

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DOPE FIEND KILLA G

never get high on your own supply

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