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Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003



Speaking of Roman Reigns, Voices of Wrestling is slacking, but he appears to be the Linear Champion after RVD beat Cesaro who was beaten by ADR and finally Reigns beat ADR.

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fart blood
Sep 13, 2008

by VideoGames
Ok, I simply must ask: what on earth is a "linear champion"?

Jackie D
May 27, 2009

Democracy is like a tambourine - not everyone can be trusted with it.


fart blood posted:

Ok, I simply must ask: what on earth is a "linear champion"?

guy who beat the guy who beat the guy back to the beginning of time

Retromancer
Aug 21, 2007

Every time I see Goatse, I think of Maureen. That's the last thing I saw. Before I blacked out. The sight of that man's anus.

A Cena heel turn would make absolutely no difference to how anyone reacts to him except that the parts of the crowd doing the "Let's go Cena/Cena Sucks" chants would be reversed. All it would do is cost WWE a poo poo ton in merchandise sales.

bean mom
Jan 30, 2009

fart blood posted:

Ok, I simply must ask: what on earth is a "linear champion"?

to be the man you gotta beat the man. The Linear Championship considers every match to be a title match. Only pinfall/submission and 1v1 contests apply.

Blooming Brilliant
Jul 12, 2010

Zyla posted:

to be the man you gotta beat the man. The Linear Championship considers every match to be a title match. Only pinfall/submission and 1v1 contests apply.

There's a list online with all the linear champions which is a good read, if the Linear Championship rule was enforced Kofi would be like a three time world champion and The Godfather would have been a one time champion.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

fart blood posted:

Ok, I simply must ask: what on earth is a "linear champion"?

It's a really, really silly thing and I really hope the people who talk about it are doing it in jest.

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here
Nap Ghost

fart blood posted:

Ok, I simply must ask: what on earth is a "linear champion"?

An easier way to picture it, imagine that a Linear Streak Championship started at WM30

Brock beat Taker so he is the linear Streak Champion

If Cena is the next person to beat Brock then Cena becomes the linear Streak champ

If Roman Reigns is the next one to beat Cena then Roman becomes the linear Streak champ

If Wade Barrett devastates Roman with dastardly uppercuts and vicious body blows to beat him then Wade becomes the linear Streak champion and wrestling can end.

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003



Jerusalem posted:

It's a really, really silly thing and I really hope the people who talk about it are doing it in jest.

No, it's the most important WWE title. :colbert:

Jayou
Mar 14, 2007

Sparkly Vampires are Wrestlicious!

fart blood posted:

Ok, I simply must ask: what on earth is a "linear champion"?

The linear champion theory in football/soccer makes Scotland the most successful team of all time, with England as the 2nd. That may give you an idea of how out of whack it is.

But they generally make fun, if meaningless reading http://www.ufwc.co.uk/rankings/

Shima Honnou
Dec 1, 2010

The Once And Future King Of Dicetroit

College Slice

Jackie D posted:

guy who beat the guy who beat the guy back to the beginning of time

To be the man, you've got to beat the man.

Then whoever beats you becomes the man until they are also beaten.

e;fb

Grant DaNasty
Jul 17, 2006

The only thing interesting about the linear championship is that it usually stays pretty close to the real champion. When it could have easily been lost to some dude that left for another promotion or retired years ago.

fariz
Nov 10, 2009

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.
The worst part of the Cena Cesaro match was king and Cole repeatedly saying stuff like THAT WAS PRETTY INCREDIBLE FOUR A GUY WHO CAN'T WRESTLE IF HE CAN'T WRESTLE WHY IS HE DOING THAT HAHAHA OMG HE'S SUCH A GREAT WRASSLER

dialhforhero
Apr 3, 2008
Am I 🧑‍🏫 out of touch🤔? No🧐, it's the children👶 who are wrong🤷🏼‍♂️
All this discussion about up and comers/midcarders/etc. just confirms the fact that they really need to make it so the IC and USA belts (and more importantly, who owns them) are taken more seriously.

Daniel Bryan
May 23, 2006

GOAT

fariz posted:

The worst part of the Cena Cesaro match was king and Cole repeatedly saying stuff like THAT WAS PRETTY INCREDIBLE FOUR A GUY WHO CAN'T WRESTLE IF HE CAN'T WRESTLE WHY IS HE DOING THAT HAHAHA OMG HE'S SUCH A GREAT WRASSLER

Sounds like they were unhappy with the "You Can't Wrestle" chants at Battleground and so this was their response.

fart blood
Sep 13, 2008

by VideoGames
Just watched Raw from last night.

I like that the women wrestlers have actual wrestling programs now. AJ and Paige have an actual feud, Naomi has a new submission finisher that I like, and even Brie and Stephanie close the show, which is cool.

But Brie is an absolutely awful actress, and I can't stand how she telegraphs the word "bitch." Really aggravating.

Speedboat Jones
Dec 28, 2008



Lipstick Apathy

fariz posted:

The worst part of the Cena Cesaro match was king and Cole repeatedly saying stuff like THAT WAS PRETTY INCREDIBLE FOUR A GUY WHO CAN'T WRESTLE IF HE CAN'T WRESTLE WHY IS HE DOING THAT HAHAHA OMG HE'S SUCH A GREAT WRASSLER

King constantly repeating poo poo like "CESARO JUST COULDN'T GET THE JOB DONE. THAT'S THE FACE OF A MAN WHO TRIED HIS BEST AND COULDN'T DELIVER" has some folks screaming "burial" too.

The_Rob
Feb 1, 2007

Blah blah blah blah!!

Daniel Bryan posted:

Sounds like they were unhappy with the "You Can't Wrestle" chants at Battleground and so this was their response.

Except he had been getting them for about 8 years now

Prozach
Oct 30, 2013

When God invented Lycra, he was thinking about Divas matches.

fart blood posted:

Just watched Raw from last night.

I like that the women wrestlers have actual wrestling programs now. AJ and Paige have an actual feud, Naomi has a new submission finisher that I like, and even Brie and Stephanie close the show, which is cool.

But Brie is an absolutely awful actress, and I can't stand how she telegraphs the word "bitch." Really aggravating.

BETCH.

UltimoDragonQuest
Oct 5, 2011



Reigns is limited but the reason his singles run is flat is not because he's plateaued for now. The Shield created unreasonable expectations and WWE solidified his first singles program as a disappointment by giving him Orton. For 18 months the crowd was trained to expect a level of action Reigns can't meet on his own. He might have been better off with a Goldberg push. Instead, one of his five moves of doom is a 3 star tag match. Reigns can't be The Guy without developing an elite attribute, but nothing is a red flag until he gets through the HHH feud.

I don't know if Vince is a genius for having Rollins and Ambrose ready as replacements or an idiot for saddling Reigns with Orton. Everyone has known Orton was hopeless for at least 5 months. Reigns is in the fourth or fifth biggest match at Summerslam. He's below a proxy feud between the wives of wrestlers!

fariz
Nov 10, 2009

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.
Reigns and Orton are both pretty cool. HTH

achillesforever6
Apr 23, 2012

psst you wanna do a communism?
I love that Stardust put some nerdy easter eggs on that blackboard for that skit apparently the three were:
Kessel run. Les Enfants Terribles. Flux capacitor? The second one I don't really get for the context of everything, but I'm not going to fault a guy for being a huge MGS fan.

Speedboat Jones
Dec 28, 2008



Lipstick Apathy

achillesforever6 posted:

I love that Stardust put some nerdy easter eggs on that blackboard for that skit apparently the three were:
Kessel run. Les Enfants Terribles. Flux capacitor? The second one I don't really get for the context of everything, but I'm not going to fault a guy for being a huge MGS fan.

Cody Rhodes is my spirit animal.

Codependent Poster
Oct 20, 2003

fariz posted:

Reigns and Orton are both pretty cool. HTH

Working with Orton will also help Reigns improve.

Ragnarok the Red
Jun 21, 2002

Codependent Poster posted:

Working with Orton will also help Reigns improve.

He could stand to add more headlocks to his repertoire...

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"
Roman "Resthold" Reigns coming for you, sucka!

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.

Ragnarok the Red posted:

He could stand to add more headlocks to his repertoire...

Maybe Reigns can teach him how to break a table.

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009

Ragnarok the Red posted:

He could stand to add more headlocks to his repertoire...

orton can be very guilty of going to the restholds too often but he's still a very good, capable worker and that's the kind of wrestler Reigns needs to be working with

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here
Nap Ghost
They broke SHIELD up wayyyy too soon.

I am working on a thesis that will shock PSP to it's core with my proofs and evidences.

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009

I like how many people said that Roman Reigns was their favorite member of the Shield but now that they've broken up and his limitations have been exposed it's like yeah... yeah he still needs a lot of work

Shima Honnou
Dec 1, 2010

The Once And Future King Of Dicetroit

College Slice

Supreme Allah posted:

They broke SHIELD up wayyyy too soon.

I am working on a thesis that will shock PSP to it's core with my proofs and evidences.

Will you shock the world?

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Cardboard Box posted:

I like how many people said that Roman Reigns was their favorite member of the Shield but now that they've broken up and his limitations have been exposed it's like yeah... yeah he still needs a lot of work

I've always been a fan of all three members of the Shield; Reigns worked best as part of a team, where Ambrose and Rollins could cover up a lot of the rough edges that he had in the ring. It was inevitable that once all three of them went their seperate ways, that Reigns was going to need the most work.

I'm confident he'll continue to improve in a lot of different ways as time progresses, though. Isn't the whole general idea for him to win the Rumble next year and then possibly win the title from someone big like Brock or Cena at Mania? I'm sure Hunter & Pals will see to it that he's ready for when the time comes.

He's not 100% atrocious in the ring right now, even if his promo-cutting skills are limited to GRRRRRRR I'M THE BEST YOU STINK I'M GONNA BEAT YOU. He'll never be a Ric Flair or CM Punk on the mic, but if he's supposed to be the next King poo poo in the company, they'll train the everloving poo poo out of him so he can at least get on the microphone and not sound like a See 'n Say.

Abrasive Obelisk
May 2, 2013

I joined th
ROVPACK IN THE HOOUUUUSE!
:vince:
he still knows...

Gonz posted:

I've always been a fan of all three members of the Shield; Reigns worked best as part of a team, where Ambrose and Rollins could cover up a lot of the rough edges that he had in the ring. It was inevitable that once all three of them went their seperate ways, that Reigns was going to need the most work.

I'm confident he'll continue to improve in a lot of different ways as time progresses, though. Isn't the whole general idea for him to win the Rumble next year and then possibly win the title from someone big like Brock or Cena at Mania? I'm sure Hunter & Pals will see to it that he's ready for when the time comes.

He's not 100% atrocious in the ring right now, even if his promo-cutting skills are limited to GRRRRRRR I'M THE BEST YOU STINK I'M GONNA BEAT YOU. He'll never be a Ric Flair or CM Punk on the mic, but if he's supposed to be the next King poo poo in the company, they'll train the everloving poo poo out of him so he can at least get on the microphone and not sound like a See 'n Say.

Honestly, Reigns has 5 months to be a main event star, or at least as good as Orton, because he's getting a Batista reaction if he wins the Rumble in this quality. Especially if Bryan comes back at or before that time/crowd gets really really hot for Ambrose.

Action Shakespeare
Mar 25, 2010

TIME magazine's Person of the Year 1996
I hope Stardust and Golddust never wrestle again and their entire story is told via promos of gradually increasing length.

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"

Action Shakespeare posted:

I hope Stardust and Golddust never wrestle again and their entire story is told via promos of gradually increasing length.

The backstage stuff with the chalkboards and the cosmic horror references are becoming my favorite parts of Raw/Smackdown. Whomever is writing for those two guys right now is hitting it out of the park.

Cardboard Box
Jul 14, 2009

Gonz posted:

I've always been a fan of all three members of the Shield; Reigns worked best as part of a team, where Ambrose and Rollins could cover up a lot of the rough edges that he had in the ring. It was inevitable that once all three of them went their seperate ways, that Reigns was going to need the most work.

I'm confident he'll continue to improve in a lot of different ways as time progresses, though. Isn't the whole general idea for him to win the Rumble next year and then possibly win the title from someone big like Brock or Cena at Mania? I'm sure Hunter & Pals will see to it that he's ready for when the time comes.

He's not 100% atrocious in the ring right now, even if his promo-cutting skills are limited to GRRRRRRR I'M THE BEST YOU STINK I'M GONNA BEAT YOU. He'll never be a Ric Flair or CM Punk on the mic, but if he's supposed to be the next King poo poo in the company, they'll train the everloving poo poo out of him so he can at least get on the microphone and not sound like a See 'n Say.

oh yeah, I was not really trying to slight him, I like him and I think he has a lot of potential. given his level of experience he's already pretty solid and he improved a lot while working the Shield and I'm sure he'll continue to improve. he's also young, tall, muscular, good-looking and their chosen one so he'll get a million chances to get there.

Abrasive Obelisk posted:

Honestly, Reigns has 5 months to be a main event star, or at least as good as Orton, because he's getting a Batista reaction if he wins the Rumble in this quality. Especially if Bryan comes back at or before that time/crowd gets really really hot for Ambrose.

I don't really think so, he's still pretty over as is. wrestling skill doesn't make someone a star as much as a push does. look how over Ryback was while he was being pushed.

Speedboat Jones
Dec 28, 2008



Lipstick Apathy

Cardboard Box posted:

I like how many people said that Roman Reigns was their favorite member of the Shield but now that they've broken up and his limitations have been exposed it's like yeah... yeah he still needs a lot of work

And they're grooming him to be the next top guy, so the next era will have another top babyface who the IWC and smarks say can't really wrestle.

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"
Roman Reigns is cool as gently caress.

DrVenkman
Dec 28, 2005

I think he can hear you, Ray.

Speedboat Jones posted:

King constantly repeating poo poo like "CESARO JUST COULDN'T GET THE JOB DONE. THAT'S THE FACE OF A MAN WHO TRIED HIS BEST AND COULDN'T DELIVER" has some folks screaming "burial" too.

More than Cena and his botching/spot calling, this is the part I hated the most. King saying "Oh well he's given it his best shot and he still can't win" told me how that match was going to go. I mean, I expected Cena to win anyway...but there was some hope.

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Grendels Dad
Mar 5, 2011

Popular culture has passed you by.

Shima Honnou posted:

To be the man, you've got to beat the man.

Then whoever beats you becomes the man until they are also beaten.

e;fb

The man in question is Charon.

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