Idiots on Social Media: I blocked the FBI just in case

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the unabonger: Jun 21, 2009

Themata posted:

Well that's just spectacular. There was another one that was just posting 'TITTIESASSCUNTBALLSCUNT' in all caps over and over, as well. No idea.

This is a line from Yeezus. Not that it excuses it.

# ? Jul 11, 2013 18:50

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 11:27

Fatkraken: Jun 23, 2005; Fun-time is over.

dijon du jour posted:

Well? Don't leave us hanging! I want to know what valuable lesson I can apparently learn from burnt biscuits.

Reduce cooking temperatures by 20 degrees for fan assisted ovens.

Alternatively, anything brown is bad, from the rest of the posts this one seems more likely.

# ? Jul 11, 2013 18:55

made of bees: May 21, 2013

For some reason I actually clicked on that one and I fully expected it to how down-home country Real Americans are so much better than those URBAN or FOREIGN people but nah it's just some innocuous thing about how nobody's perfect and don't sweat the small stuff etc etc.

# ? Jul 11, 2013 19:01

its all nice on rice: Nov 12, 2006; Sweet, Salty Goodness.; Buglord

Black is mom. Blue is their newborn. Red is dad.

I love hearing about babies taking a poo poo.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? Jul 11, 2013 20:06

York_M_Chan: Sep 11, 2003

Pope Mobile posted:

Black is mom. Blue is their newborn. Red is dad.

I love hearing about babies taking a poo poo.

Literally 5 of my FB friend has babies in May and 3 others April & June. I get so much poo poo like this.

# ? Jul 11, 2013 20:59

Buzkashi: Feb 4, 2003; College Slice

York_M_Chan posted:

Literally 5 of my FB friend has babies in May and 3 others April & June. I get so much poo poo like this.

Apparently they do too

# ? Jul 11, 2013 21:44

Read After Burning: Feb 19, 2013; "All this, for me? 💃Ah, you didn't have to! 🥰"

"OBORTION" "ROMEY" :downs:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 03:24

sexpig by night: Sep 8, 2011; by Azathoth

My favorite part of that "Nicki Minaj says she's voting Romney" thing was Nicki Minaj having to explain the concept of a character to people.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 04:24

Tiggum: Oct 24, 2007; Your life and your quest end here.

Macaluso posted:

This kind of thing makes me sad. I have a friend who plans to do this when he has kids. Telling your kids right away is just taking away the one big fun magical thing a kid can believe in before they become adults and realize how much the world sucks.

Bullshit. Kids don't care if it's real or not, it's still fun to pretend.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 04:36

Kimmalah: Nov 14, 2005; Basically just a baby in a trenchcoat.

Tiggum posted:

Bullshit. Kids don't care if it's real or not, it's still fun to pretend.

True, but it sounds like these people won't even let their kids pretend.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 06:17

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

This has been making the rounds...

# ? Jul 12, 2013 08:43

Karma Comedian: Feb 2, 2012

Ratjaculation posted:

This has been making the rounds...

That picture or what? The picture is pretty funny even if it may be STDH.txt so I'm not seeing the idiot here.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 09:47

Ignimbrite: Jan 5, 2010; BALLS BALLS BALLS; Dinosaur Gum

The original poster telling the person who corrected them to never post on their statuses again because they corrected them. There's barely even any criticism in that posts, I'd hate to see how the OP would react to real criticism.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 10:05

Just Burgs: Jan 15, 2011; Gravy Boat 2k

So a person on my feed posted this stupid image today:

Which caused the following discussion:

(Blue being the person who posted the image)

Which prompts Blue to make this status update:

Noteworthy for both the stupidity of the post and Red's choice of middle name.

EDIT: But wait, there's more!

Clearly any perceived racism exhibited by Paula Deen is just the result of people who don't know anything about social psychology.

Just Burgs has a new favorite as of 15:55 on Jul 12, 2013

# ? Jul 12, 2013 10:40

Doctor Dope: Oct 4, 2005; timey-wimey fruity booty

THE NEXT MORNING :sparkles:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 10:51

ol qwerty bastard: Dec 13, 2005; If you want something done, do it yourself!

OmniDesol posted:

Noteworthy for both the stupidity of the post and Red's choice of middle name.

Hah, people who choose attention-seeking names on Facebook are the best. I've probably mentioned him before but one of my friends has a friend who comments on her statuses all the time whose middle name is "AfricanWildDawg".

# ? Jul 12, 2013 11:03

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

OmniDesol posted:

So a person on my feed posted this stupid image today:

Which caused the following discussion:

(Blue being the person who posted the image)

Which prompts Blue to make this status update:

Noteworthy for both the stupidity of the post and Red's choice of middle name.

So freedom of speech means no one is allowed to disagree with you, ever?

I need to move to America, peer review must be hella easy over there.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 12:08

Sandweed: Sep 7, 2006; All your friends are me.

I kinda hope this is some high level trolling.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 12:55

Flaggy: Jul 6, 2007; Grandpa Cthulu needs his napping chair; Grimey Drawer

Sandweed posted:

I kinda hope this is some high level trolling.

Ok, I imagine most of them already had fedoras, so how would they tell each other apart. I know what MLP is but what is FiM? Also OAB? There are ranks in being into Ponies? High ranking ones must wear a Fedora, lower level bronies must wear ...?

# ? Jul 12, 2013 13:21

Macaluso: Sep 23, 2005; I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG, BROTHER!

Flaggy posted:

Ok, I imagine most of them already had fedoras, so how would they tell each other apart. I know what MLP is but what is FiM? Also OAB? There are ranks in being into Ponies? High ranking ones must wear a Fedora, lower level bronies must wear ...?

"FiM' is just the rest of the title "friendship is magic". I have no idea what OAB is

# ? Jul 12, 2013 13:53

I Before E: Jul 2, 2012

Macaluso posted:

"FiM' is just the rest of the title "friendship is magic". I have no idea what OAB is

Order of Adult Bronies?

Now I'm picturing a Masons-esque organization, just centered around MLP.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 13:55

Flaggy: Jul 6, 2007; Grandpa Cthulu needs his napping chair; Grimey Drawer

I Before E posted:

Order of Adult Bronies?

Now I'm picturing a Masons-esque organization, just centered around MLP.

Against my better judgement I googled it. Overly Attached Brony. :aaa:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:03

Deadly Chlorine: Nov 8, 2009; The accumulated filth of all the dog poop and hairballs will foam up about their waists and all the catladies and dog crazies will look up and shout "Save us!"
... and I'll look down and whisper
"No."

GonzoRonin posted:

THE NEXT MORNING

This is the most perfect series of posts. :allears:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:10

York_M_Chan: Sep 11, 2003

GonzoRonin posted:

THE NEXT MORNING

Can you really get banned from FB for a length of time?

Man, shock radio still got it!

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:14

SybilVimes: Oct 29, 2011

York_M_Chan posted:

Can you really get banned from FB for a length of time?

"Banned" is overselling it, it's basically read-only mode as punishment for a few hours, but yeah, you get it for a variety of things (reported comments, people rejecting a friendship rq due to not knowing you, etc).

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:26

Deadly Chlorine: Nov 8, 2009; The accumulated filth of all the dog poop and hairballs will foam up about their waists and all the catladies and dog crazies will look up and shout "Save us!"
... and I'll look down and whisper
"No."

Anyway to contribute, there was a local LGBT pride parade a few weeks ago, there were more people than there ever was attending this year, everyone seems very happy and many straight families went to the event to support as well. Then I read the comments on the photos posted later. :allears:

This must be one of the most passive aggressive "love the sinner hate the sin" things I have ever seen.

CONSEQUENCES OF THE GAY AGENDA and 31 likes.

Still less hate than previous years, but gently caress.

EDIT: I love the new anonymizer too, this is great.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:43

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

GonzoRonin posted:

THE NEXT MORNING

Since that looks to be a fairly adult poster from the picture I wonder what they do for a living that it's ok to go around saying it. I mean I work in a fairly understanding environment and probably swear 15-20 times a day but don't think I'd say that to describe someone just because it really is considered that offensive already.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:44

utada: Jun 6, 2006; I had the craziest dream last night. I was dancing the White Swan.

Somebody just learned about the word 'sheeple'! Blue is her husband. They live in the same house so it's not like she couldn't have just asked him at the dinner table or something.

Here's the story that was under the cut in all its awful glory:

posted:

I ran into one of these today at the Sprint store. The person who worked with me was going to college and working over the summer. Because my old phone had died and was a dinosaur (I wanted it to be non GPS on purpose), he presumed to think I was of course, useless.

So I decided to ask him some questions. Do you know about the FED and what it is. He replied, of course, it's a part of the US government and is regulated. I said really? Then asked, and how about the $40 billion the FED is printing every month ....it's now called Q3? He said, the FED is regulated that when any new money is printed, the old money must be destroyed. Final question was about 9/11. When I asked if he believed the government's version of it and some other important facts, he said....oh yeah, ha ha .....you're one of those conspiracy theorist.

Obviously this young man is still stuck in the matrix as he smirked at my much older than his face.

Then he had the balls to ask me if I ever attended college (like that means anything while he's paying for his education using loans that have doubled in interest ...so he'll be a debt slave once he graduates and will spend his entire life paying it back). I replied by saying, does that really matter? But, just for your information, I do have a BA in psychology (and my final payment on my loan ended when I was 31) .... and I went on to get my masters later in life until I realized it wouldn't be worth it, and I quit after 2 semesters.

But don't worry, because he KNOWS he is going make a lotta money once he graduates college. That's the majority of AmeeriKa's youth today. Sad to say, but they are just as brainwashed and propagated as the baby boomer generation.

Check out that Matrix :iceburn:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 14:55

Deadly Chlorine: Nov 8, 2009; The accumulated filth of all the dog poop and hairballs will foam up about their waists and all the catladies and dog crazies will look up and shout "Save us!"
... and I'll look down and whisper
"No."

utada posted:

Somebody just learned about the word 'sheeple'! Blue is her husband. They live in the same house so it's not like she couldn't have just asked him at the dinner table or something.

Here's the story that was under the cut in all its awful glory:

Check out that Matrix .

Holy poo poo, this is on the level of those "And then the baby was Albert Einstein" stories.

The best part is still the "I have a BA in psychology :smug:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 15:15

Mortanis: Dec 28, 2005; It's your father's lightsaber. This is the weapon of a Jedi Knight.; College Slice

Wizard of Smart posted:

That picture or what? The picture is pretty funny even if it may be STDH.txt so I'm not seeing the idiot here.

The information comes from some Science of God book that was pretty popular about 10 years ago. I had a coworker that used that exact "10 feet closer to the sun" thing after bringing the book to work for a few weeks and reading facts every drat day. Finally another coworker got pissed and pointed out people climb mountains without bursting into flames. The book wound up in the trash.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 16:22

hepscat: Jan 16, 2005; Avenging Nun

Read After Burning posted:

My friend found a page: Heterosexual Awareness Month and it's..exactly what it sounds like.

Holy poo poo, this page.

We finally got a hetero to almost commit suicide for being bullied by gays! That totally evens up the score, guys!

I would NSFW the next one but it was posted for all to see on a page called Heterosexual Awareness Month so it must be kosher.

Yup, totally found in a total toy store totally in front of all the kiddos. Totally not some gag gift in a store selling dildos.

Bet that graphic looked pretty sweet on blingee.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 18:32

its all nice on rice: Nov 12, 2006; Sweet, Salty Goodness.; Buglord

hepscat posted:

Bet that graphic looked pretty sweet on blingee.

Man, our straight rainbows have nothing on those fab gay ones.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 18:39

Flaggy: Jul 6, 2007; Grandpa Cthulu needs his napping chair; Grimey Drawer

hepscat posted:

Holy poo poo, this page.

We finally got a hetero to almost commit suicide for being bullied by gays! That totally evens up the score, guys!

I would NSFW the next one but it was posted for all to see on a page called Heterosexual Awareness Month so it must be kosher.

Yup, totally found in a total toy store totally in front of all the kiddos. Totally not some gag gift in a store selling dildos.

Bet that graphic looked pretty sweet on blingee.

My favorite thing about that whole page is they won't engage anyone in an insightful discussion. Anyone who brings up why marriage equality should be considered a bad thing basically gets shut out with "Why are you here than." kind of bullshit rhetoric.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 18:45

Silly Hippie: Sep 18, 2007

HAM Institute. This has to be a joke.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 18:46

hepscat: Jan 16, 2005; Avenging Nun

Pope Mobile posted:

Man, our straight rainbows have nothing on those fab gay ones.

You're not the only one complaining.

HAM posted:

Brianna Our rainbow is Awesome, and jealousy is a disease, get well soon. !

# ? Jul 12, 2013 18:52

davebo: Nov 15, 2006; Parallel lines do meet, but they do it incognito; College Slice

hepscat posted:

As a straight person, I feel there are one too many shades in that rainbow.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 19:46

spank my snatch: Jun 4, 2009

davebo posted:

As a straight person, I feel there are one too many shades in that rainbow.

Seems strange to me that in what's supposed to be a colorless, anti-gay rainbow, they left pink and purple. :raise:

# ? Jul 12, 2013 20:25

Stoatbringer: Sep 15, 2004; naw, you love it you little ho-bot

Mortanis posted:

The information comes from some Science of God book that was pretty popular about 10 years ago. I had a coworker that used that exact "10 feet closer to the sun" thing after bringing the book to work for a few weeks and reading facts every drat day. Finally another coworker got pissed and pointed out people climb mountains without bursting into flames. The book wound up in the trash.

I had someone say a similar thing to me, but it was something like 1000 miles closer to/further from the sun and we would all die. A minute of googling showed that the Earth's distance from the sun varies by up to five million miles during the year as it travels on it's elliptical orbit.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 20:29

Djeser: Mar 22, 2013; it's crow time again

hepscat posted:

Holy poo poo, this page.

We finally got a hetero to almost commit suicide for being bullied by gays! That totally evens up the score, guys!

I think that one's supposed to be a joke about...how people are happy when gay people don't kill themselves? Ha ha those gays liking it when people don't die

Stoatbringer posted:

I had someone say a similar thing to me, but it was something like 1000 miles closer to/further from the sun and we would all die. A minute of googling showed that the Earth's distance from the sun varies by up to five million miles during the year as it travels on it's elliptical orbit.

Not only is Earth's orbit elliptical, but the closest point in its orbit is during winter in the Northern Hemisphere. The distance doesn't matter that much, because there isn't much to 'cool down' solar radiation in space, so even when you're five million kilometers further away, you're still getting about the same amount of light.

# ? Jul 12, 2013 22:04

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 11:27

booshi: Aug 14, 2004; ||||||||||

Deadly Chlorine posted:

The best part is still the "I have a BA in psychology "

That and "... I went on to get my masters later in life until I realized it wouldn't be worth it, and I quit after 2 semesters".

Quit half way through? Good job!

# ? Jul 12, 2013 22:16

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