r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

M_Sinistrari: Sep 5, 2008; Do you like scary movies?

Rosalind posted:

I posted about this in the last thread but again just echoing my feelings of why is "Don't involve your non-consenting friends and family in your fetish" such a difficult concept for so many people?

Could expand that to "Don't involve anyone non-consenting in your fetish" after that one post in the last thread had an employee wanting her boyfriend to be called Master by her coworkers at the office party.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 16:52

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# ? May 12, 2024 12:08

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Rosalind posted:

I posted about this in the last thread but again just echoing my feelings of why is "Don't involve your non-consenting friends and family in your fetish" such a difficult concept for so many people?

Because they view it as socially acceptable as coming out as LGBTQ+ and expect everyone to applaud them.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 16:56

sephiRoth IRA: Jun 13, 2007; "Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan

M_Sinistrari posted:

Could expand that to "Don't involve anyone non-consenting in your fetish" after that one post in the last thread had an employee wanting her boyfriend to be called Master by her coworkers at the office party.

Oh I remember that one! That and the weird plumber who left a note talking about his dominatrix with his clients. Those people gross me the gently caress out

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:11

Jamie Faith: Jan 13, 2020

Rosalind posted:

I posted about this in the last thread but again just echoing my feelings of why is "Don't involve your non-consenting friends and family in your fetish" such a difficult concept for so many people?

What really gets me is like, why would you WANT to include your friends and family(!!!) in your fetish??? Bleaugh. That's borderline incest. :barf:

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:22

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

Shroomie posted:

No, it is. "Drink while you shop" has become a new thing in places where it's legal.

There are tons of Whole Foods with bars in them. Lucky's Markets have bars. I just read somewhere Barnes & Noble is even putting bars in their stores.

There is a Whole Foods near me too that has a bar in it but I doubt people could order a beer than leave the bar area with it. I'm willing to admit being wrong since I live in the Midwest and liquor laws are bonkers all over. I remember spending untold hours in bars with my dad while growing up in Wisconsin but when my mom moved to Indiana I learned kids are not allowed in bars and no alcohol on Sunday. Was a wierd culture shock for a 10 year old.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:31

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

In NYC that's the rule, you have to stay in the bar area. We go to trivia at the nearest Whole Foods bar because the prize is a gift card good for the whole store.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:33

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for not shaving my head alongside my coworkers in support of a coworker with cancer?

I work at a gas station, have for over a year. It's got a small subway inside, and we have a staff of 8 on the gas station side. Subway has a staff of 10.

Our assistant manager on the gas side was diagnosed with cancer and as it usually happens shaved her hair when it began falling out from the chemo.

Everyone in the store has decided to shave their heads in support. Everyone. Both gas station side and subway side. I'm the only one who wont and I'm being treated very passive-aggressively. I'm getting snide comments Time to time, when customers ask why everyone shaved their heads all my coworkers give sarcastic responses clearly aimed at me. It's been a few weeks and I'm getting frustrated. I've mentioned it to my manager and she gave me something how they're frustrated that not everyone seems fully committed to wishing our assistant manager good luck.

I'm a 27 year old guy. I havent cut my hair in 5 years other than basic trims to remove dead ends and groom it. I'm proud of my hair. I've only cut my hair once since I turned 18. I know it sounds stupid but I am very proud of my hair. I suffer from major depression and my hair is the one thing in my life I feel I have control over, if that makes any sense. Plus I have never found a short hair style that made me feel comfortable or one I felt I looked good in.

Tl:dr AITA for not cutting my hair along my coworkers to support a coworker diagnosed with cancer. Coworkers seem to treat me like one

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:35

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for disapproving of the age gap between my sister and hew new boyfriend?

My sister (30F) has informed me (26M) and rest of the family that she is dating someone. When we pressed for more info, we learned he is only 19.

I've met him and honestly, I just don't approve of her age gap. I think its really wrong. I told my sister she has something wrong with her if she thinks this is ok. She then told me that I'm an rear end in a top hat and why can't I be happy for her. Maybe i am harsh on her but to me this isn't ok and weird. My sis is 30 not a teenager anymore. AITA?

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:44

Rosalind: Apr 30, 2013; When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not shaving my head alongside my coworkers in support of a coworker with cancer?

This is one of those cases where he's NTA but it doesn't matter because his coworkers have already decided he is. His best bet is to try to show his support in different ways (donating money, offering to make meals for the assistant manager), but even then since his refusal to shave his head is so visible, he's still going to get poo poo for it.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:45

Rent-A-Cop: Oct 15, 2004; I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for disapproving of the age gap between my sister and hew new boyfriend?

Needs to quit being a cockblocker.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:46

ziasquinn: Jan 1, 2006; Fallen Rib

the r/relationships posts are coming from inside the thread with this anecdote: I was invited to be a bridesmaid in my sister's wedding last year but dis-invited from it after she found out her now-husband's family is transphobic and didn't want me in the wedding party. My sister was like, "Too bad, if you don't come to the wedding you're being selfish and dramatic." AITA?? (no, obviously).

# ? Jan 15, 2020 17:49

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

star eater posted:

the r/relationships posts are coming from inside the thread with this anecdote: I was invited to be a bridesmaid in my sister's wedding last year but dis-invited from it after she found out her now-husband's family is transphobic and didn't want me in the wedding party. My sister was like, "Too bad, if you don't come to the wedding you're being selfish and dramatic." AITA?? (no, obviously).

what a bitch

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:03

Rosalind: Apr 30, 2013; When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change.

The only thing worse than a bigot is a bigot-enabler. I always think about this section from MLK Jr.'s letter from a Birmingham Jail which is applicable to all forms of bigotry:

quote:

First, I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to "order" than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: "I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action"; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man's freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a "more convenient season." Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:07

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

Rosalind posted:

This is one of those cases where he's NTA but it doesn't matter because his coworkers have already decided he is. His best bet is to try to show his support in different ways (donating money, offering to make meals for the assistant manager), but even then since his refusal to shave his head is so visible, he's still going to get poo poo for it.

I feel like this is something that gets lost so much in the AITA discussions - it doesn't matter who the rear end in a top hat is because it's more about trying to get along with your community than parceling out blame. And the former is a much more complex navigation than the latter.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:08

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

Miserable Maid posted:

You straight up stole it. Doesn't matter if you paid after

It's like bolting out the door with product, and coming back later and paying for it, and not understanding why they're pissed. Ok maybe extreme analogy, but same thing

Have some drat self control

It is absolutely nothing like that.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:17

Bag of Hamsters: Jul 12, 2006; Gimme yer frickin pancreas

I needs it for reasons.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not shaving my head alongside my coworkers in support of a coworker with cancer?

Must be one of those extra special gas station where turnover isn't high and people are paid more than the base minimum to do a thankless job.

gently caress these assholes. I shave most of my head and still wouldn't shave the whole thing unless it was a good friend or a relative.

The worse a company treats you, the more they pressure you into acting like a family to make up for not being worth your time.

(Still, they've already drunk the kool aid so get out if you can while asking if the company is helping with the bills/putting anything towards cancer charity instead of making minimum wage folks gently caress with their bodies for optics.)

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:17

Clawtopsy: Dec 17, 2009; What a fascinatingly unusual cock. Now, allow me to show you my collection...

AITA For Possibly Getting a Teacher In Trouble?

quote:

I'll call my three friends Sam, Joe and Mario and the two teachers involved Mrs. P and Mrs. W. I'm an 8th grade middle school student along with my friends. There is a table right next to mine that my three friends sit at for lunch, they all tend to be a kind of obnoxious group. They would do things such as dumping out a milk carton and stomping on it to make a large boom sound, there's other things that they do but I don't have the time to list them off. Mrs. P along with Mrs. W are always in the lunch room during lunch to keep an eye on students. Mrs. P is always trying to keep an eye on the table with my friends, which is 100% understandable.

Now the story begins, one day the table is blowing up extra milk cartons and making extra noise, Mrs. P comes over to try her best to stop it but doesn't take anything to far. I emptied out one of my water bottles so that Sam could fill it up with some of his soda for me, the original intent was for it to blow up but we figured that would be a waste of soda and a waste of time so I instead decide to just drink it as usual. However as the original idea was to blow it up Sam had shaken the bottle and Mrs. P saw that he shook it up and was concerned that we would do something bad with it. I slowly started to let some of the air out of the bottle to keep it from exploding, but just as I start to release some of the air Mrs. P comes up and takes the bottle out of concern. I try to explain to her that I'm just going to drink it but she is having none of it. She carries the bottle around with her and so Joe and I go try to approach her to explain what we were doing with it and that she should give it back to me, her excuse as to not giving it back was that she wasn't sure what was in the bottle even though she visibly saw Sam pour the soda into my bottle. I proceed to explain to her that I payed for that bottle and that Sam paid for the soda and that if she kept it that even though the combined total of items would only be a few dollars that it would still be theft. If her intent was the give the item back then it would be acceptable, especially in a school environment. She then went on to throw away the bottle and tell me that we could stay after lunch with Mrs. W (the principal) to talk to her about it. Lunch came to an end and Mrs. P looked right at Sam, Joe, Mario and I then walked out of the cafeteria. Joe, Mario and I then proceeded to go into Mrs. W's office to report the incident. Once in the office it was a matter of filling out the sheet of paper and turning it into the lady working the desk. So far nothing has happened over the last four days about it and if nothing is done by four-teen days then I plan to go in and report it once again. So someone please tell me would I be the rear end in a top hat if Mrs. P got in trouble or possibly fired?

Reddit voted YTA.

AITA for being adamant about not letting my friends and teacher buy me food because I'm uncomfortable?

quote:

Throwaway account because obvious reasons.

For some reference, about a month ago a group of my friends and I participated in a school event. We raised money for charity with a bunch of other groups, and there was a main cycling event (for the spirit part of it.) Long story short, our group won the best costume prize, and now we have a pizza party.

I have some dietary restrictions though. I'm vegetarian, and I'm allergic to gluten. I don't order from any fast food pizza chains (or fast food chains in general) because I can't be 100% certain that what they provide will definitely fit under that criteria. For example, do they use the same knives for a non veg pizza as they would for a veg pizza? Do they clean their counters to make sure there is no wheat flour in contact with the gluten free pizza? It's nit-picky. And I feel that if I were to try to bring these concerns up to a pizza place, it may get very offensive very fast. Which is why I would rather avoid the entire situation and not eat the pizza.

Upon some back and forth with my friends (they were very very adamant that I should order pizza), they reluctantly decided they were kind of alright with my decision. They want me to be included, and I really appreciate that.

Yesterday, the teacher who conducts this event asked my friend (who is in her class) what snacks I like, as a substitute of pizza.

My friend and I went on a bit of a back and forth on this, because I still didn't want my teacher going out of her way to buy me something. And while I eventually caved into telling them about something that I can eat, I feel like my friend got a little upset. Fast forward to today, a second friend questioned me on the same topic, and I know they also got upset too.

I think a lot of this just revolves around the fact that I get uncomfortable whenever someone goes out of their way to do something for me. It�s a pizza party. And yes I have restrictions, but it doesn�t have to be this complicated. Right?

I�m not wondering if my friend�s are to blame here, because I know they don�t want me to leave myself out this easily. But is my approach the rear end in a top hat? Should I have just caved in the first place and avoided all of this?

If you made it till here, thanks for reading.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I'm going to bring snacks that I and everyone else could eat.

Tl;dr: I upset my friends by being uncomfortable about them going out of their way to accommodate my dietary restrictions for a pizza party.

Reddit voted YTA.

AITA for telling a student last week that I couldn�t be their pseudo-mom?

quote:

I�m a high school teacher. And I�ve been going through a pretty rough patch. My fiance decided to break up with me the day before winter break ended, so I won�t be seeing him and his daughter anymore. It�s been a week and I still really miss them.

It�s hard to swallow the fact that I won�t ever be married to him and that I won�t get to see his kid ever again, most likely. She was 11, and so even if she plans to reach out to me later as an adult, it could take 7 years or more. And she may not ever decide to reach out again and I will really never get to talk to or see her again. I don't even have many photos of her saved with me. I loved both of them a lot, and it hurts. We had some difficulties, but I wanted to be a part of their lives forever and now I can�t, no matter how much I want to. We were engaged and I was imagining being able to be his daughter�s (step)mommy and growing old with my ex-fiance forever.

Anyway, when I got back to school, one former student of mine visited me after school while I was trying to catch up on the grading I did not do over winter break. I was having an awful day myself when she started to talk to me about some mental health difficulties and stuff that happened with her family over the two weeks we had off. I tried my best to respond empathetically and asked if she wanted me to book her a appointment with our school therapist.

I did end up booking her an appointment for this upcoming week, but before she left, she told me she wished I could be her pseudo-mom.

I was taught how to have boundaries in my work with students, so I replied, bluntly, �I cannot and will not ever be your parent. Please be mindful of this boundary. And to be frank, I do not feel like I am the best person to help you and listen to you going forward. I hope Ms. [Therapist] is able to assist you. I am really tired and going through a really rough patch myself and it�s really draining for me to have to listen to such heavy stuff on a weekly or semi-weekly basis. I need to get 100 tests graded before the time I leave because I don�t want to bring any of this home for the weekend.�

The student looked like she understood but also hurt at the same time. I wished her a good weekend and told her I�d see her around. AITA for telling her that? I truly felt like I couldn�t help her anymore. I can�t do anything except for listen to her. I was really behind on my grading, and was hurting over not being able to be a mom for a girl I grew to care for very much, let alone be a �pseudo-mom� for a student I don�t even teach anymore.

Reddit, to my chagrin, voted YTA.

AITA for bailing my son out of a school project when he didn't do any work?

quote:

This happened last week, and my wife is still mad. I'm using a throwaway because she knows my main account.

Background: I (39M) am married to my wife (37F). We have a son (12M) and a daughter (7F). My son is in 7th grade, and my daughter is in 2nd grade. My son is the main focus of this story.

Over the winter break, my son was assigned a project in his social studies class. His teacher randomly assigned a country to each student (my son got Brazil). He had to create a poster on oak tag about the "5 themes of geography" related to that country. He had to use charts, graphs, images, and captions to explain each theme of geography. The project was due yesterday.

Except for the fact that my son did not tell me any of this until New Year's Day. I was shocked that he would put off such a large project for so late. He is an good student (around 80%-85% range), and he has done this very few times before- but never for a project this big. He asked me if I could just do it for him.

Now here's where my wife disagrees: I said yes to him. But first, I asked why he did this. He said that he just didn't feel like doing it over break. I made him promise that he would never wait until the last minute for a big project ever again, and he did. Then, I went out to the art store to buy some poster board, did a lot of research on Brazil, printed out some images and graphs. I typed up some captions for him, too.

The next day (Jan 2), I had work, but when I got home, I finished gluing the printed work onto the oak tag. I let it dry, wrapped it up, and gave it to him in the morning yesterday when before went to school.

When my wife found out that I was doing this, she got upset. She claims that I shouldn't have done the project for him because it teaches him that he can just be lazy and ask us to do schoolwork for him. I told her about the promise he made, but she said that it still teaches him bad habits for the rest of his school career. I'm not really sure. I know that he should've done the project earlier, but I didn't want to see my son fail the assignment when he has above-average grades and a relatively good track record.

So Reddit, AITA?

YTA for spacing out your submission so much, and Reddit voted YTA on the issue.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:18

Sunswipe: Feb 5, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not shaving my head alongside my coworkers in support of a coworker with cancer?

Just make something up. "I don't like talking about it, but my sister lost her hair to chemotherapy for cancer when I was a teenager. I was going to shave mine off in support but she stopped me and said 'Seeing your hair helps me keep going through the pain and embarrassment.' So no, I won't be cutting my hair, my sister means too much to me."

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:32

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

The dad doing his son's project is the rear end in a top hat for sure.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:32

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

Sunswipe posted:

Just make something up. "I don't like talking about it, but my sister lost her hair to chemotherapy for cancer when I was a teenager. I was going to shave mine off in support but she stopped me and said 'Seeing your hair helps me keep going through the pain and embarrassment.' So no, I won't be cutting my hair, my sister means too much to me."

Or maybe "My hair is the source of my superhuman strength, the last time I let someone cut it off it really didn't turn out well."

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:34

Fuck Your Website: Nov 29, 2003; FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE

quote:

Dear Prudence,
At the beginning of the school year, my husband and I brought a 16-year-old exchange student into our home. My husband is a teacher at the high school she is attending, so by necessity they spend a lot of time together (driving to and from school, at school events, etc.).

Over the past several months, I�ve noticed that their relationship has become very close. My husband is extremely emotionally involved in everything she does, they spend their free time together, and they text each other constantly. I don�t believe that they are having a physical relationship, but I don�t know what to do about their emotional intimacy. I confronted my husband about it, and he was angry that I would suggest that he was doing anything inappropriate with a teenager. He stated adamantly that he has come to love her as a daughter, but that his love for her is not a threat to me. Still, something feels �off� to me about their level of involvement.

So I did something that I am not proud of; I snooped through his phone to see what they are texting about. They are constantly telling each other that they love each other and miss each other. The thing is, he will tell her that he loves her right in front of me. I know that if I confess that I snooped he is going to feel that I violated his privacy.

I am starting to wonder if this situation is damaging to her, and if I need to remove her from our house to protect her from further involvement. Or am I just being the stereotypical �evil stepmom�?

�Hope She�s Not Lolita

"Prudie, I'm starting to think this thing right in front of me that looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck might be....a duck???? PLEASE ADVISE"

There was a succinct follow up: "The exchange student was placed with a different home and the ex and I are getting a divorce."

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:37

Xenocides: Jan 14, 2008; This world looks very scary....

Mozi posted:

Or maybe "My hair is the source of my superhuman strength, the last time I let someone cut it off it really didn't turn out well."

�I mean I was made a slave doing mindless labor and later was cursed to do so for eternity. That is why I am here.�

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:47

The_Franz: Aug 8, 2003

Clawtopsy posted:

AITA for bailing my son out of a school project when he didn't do any work?

The teacher is the rear end in a top hat for assigning a project over break.

Parents basically doing artsy school projects for kids is... normal? Whenever it came to that stuff my brother and I were mostly bystanders who just helped out. When the projects were brought to class and presented, the enormous quality gap made it obvious which ones were basically done by the parents.

Or maybe the teachers really believed that I, at 9 years old, and certainly not my dad, soldered up a battery powered light for an incredibly detailed diorama.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:52

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016

Rent-A-Cop posted:

Needs to quit being a cockblocker.

This is a pretty bad take if it was a 30 year old man dating a 19 year old woman. X/2 + 7 and all that

# ? Jan 15, 2020 18:55

Kitchner: Nov 9, 2012; IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER; Clapping Larry

gently caress Your Website posted:

There was a succinct follow up: "The exchange student was placed with a different home and the ex and I are getting a divorce."

In Europe this is very normal.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:12

Clawtopsy: Dec 17, 2009; What a fascinatingly unusual cock. Now, allow me to show you my collection...

Kitchner posted:

In Europe this is very normal.

To Catch a European

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:13

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

gently caress Your Website posted:

"Prudie, I'm starting to think this thing right in front of me that looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck might be....a duck???? PLEASE ADVISE"

There was a succinct follow up: "The exchange student was placed with a different home and the ex and I are getting a divorce."

Tim and Ayaka

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:14

Jamie Faith: Jan 13, 2020

Licarn posted:

the update-update after it was pointed out that someone would probably google that phrase which would lead to the reddit posts

and to spoil the fun, a year later, the op posted in /r/drama about making these, so the posts are likely a creative writing exercise by some chud who probably posts on voat/gab now

I'm honestly relieved the "birth el pup" story isn't real. It was so cringy it hurt my soul.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:21

Rent-A-Cop: Oct 15, 2004; I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

ilmucche posted:

This is a pretty bad take if it was a 30 year old man dating a 19 year old woman. X/2 + 7 and all that

Yeah but it wasn't.

As long as nobody thinks the relationship is anything it isn't I don't see a problem. There's not any kind of weird power dynamic being explored and everyone is an adult so whatever.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:28

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Clawtopsy posted:

AITA For Possibly Getting a Teacher In Trouble?

Reddit voted YTA.

AITA for being adamant about not letting my friends and teacher buy me food because I'm uncomfortable?

Reddit voted YTA.

AITA for telling a student last week that I couldn’t be their pseudo-mom?

Reddit, to my chagrin, voted YTA.

AITA for bailing my son out of a school project when he didn't do any work?

YTA for spacing out your submission so much, and Reddit voted YTA on the issue.

So on the teacher post, she's right to draw the boundary but the way she said it to the kid is harsh as gently caress. She's an rear end in a top hat for how she talked to the kid, not for having a boundary.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:54

avoid doorways: Jun 6, 2010; 'twas brillig; Gun Saliva

She's the rear end in a top hat for trying to garner sympathy by including her irrelevant tragic backstory

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:59

Problem Sleuth: Apr 12, 2011; WELCOME TO THE NEW FUTURE

Rent-A-Cop posted:

Yeah but it wasn't.

As long as nobody thinks the relationship is anything it isn't I don't see a problem. There's not any kind of weird power dynamic being explored and everyone is an adult so whatever.

Imo there's still a bad power dynamic between a 30 year old woman and a 19 year old man. Not as bad as the reverse but still not something I'd feel comfortable with

# ? Jan 15, 2020 19:59

Fuck Your Website: Nov 29, 2003; FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE

quote:

Dear Prudence,
I received an invitation to attend a Christmas party from an old college friend. He sent the invitation via social media, the guest list was open, and I accepted via social media. Attending the party will be a few old friends I hardly ever see and my wife and I are looking forward to it.

After I accepted I received the following message via social media from an old acquaintance: �Hey I�m wondering if you could not go to the party so that I can attend. I kind of dislike you that much. Much appreciated.�

It�s hard for me to imagine what his problem is regarding me. I know he went on one reportedly terrible date with my sister. I also dimly recall that years ago he wanted to be friends, but I wasn�t interested and declined his invitations. We obviously don�t care for each other, but I could certainly chat amiably with him at a party.

I�m still planning to attend, and I have been struggling with the appropriate response to his message. Should I call him for a heart to heart? Suggest to him someone hacked his email? Tell him I�m going? Another friend thinks if I don�t respond it indicates acquiescence to his request. Suggestions?

Just lol that OP allows the etiquette of responding to this imbecile's concerns to occupy the minutest portion of his thoughts instead of immediately laughing and mocking him to the nth degree 'via social media', as is the style these days. I'd love a recording of what that 'heart to heart' would sound like, though.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:06

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for going against my girlfriend�s wishes to teach a homeless man how to skateboard?

I went out for lunch with my girlfriend today. We walked to a restaurant a mile from our college campus. I walked while carrying my skateboard because I use it to get across campus faster. On our way to the restaurant, a quite dirty-looking middle-aged homeless man asked me if I could teach him how to ride a skateboard. I like to stop and interact with homeless people, but my girlfriend hates being near them because she is germaphobic and is intimidated by their presence. However, this homeless man looked quite nice so I said I�ll teach him for a few minutes. My girlfriend was tugging me away and whispering me to just go.

I didn�t want to turn down the homeless man because he looked quite nice, so I put the skateboard down and held his hands while he put his feet on the skateboard. I taught him how to push off with his foot and maintain his balance. This went on for about ten minutes until I told him I had somewhere to go. He looked like he had so much fun. My girlfriend was just on her phone and giving us some nasty looks. I gave the homeless man five dollars and told him to save that up to buy his own skateboard. He thanked me profusely for the money and taking the time out my day to brighten his.

When I went over to my girlfriend, she backed away and shouted at me to keep some distance and not to touch her until I take a long shower. I talked to her about the joy I brought to the homeless man. She said that I wasted her time and he will almost certainly spend that money on alcohol or drugs and never buy a skateboard. I told her that we got plenty of time and that�s alright if he does spend it on alcohol or drugs, but I at least made someone�s life a little bit better. She said I�m extremely gullible and that he used my kindness against me to obtain more money. I told her to stop being so cynical. After we finished arguing, I went in for a kiss and she backed away and said that was off limits too until I shower. I rolled my eyes and never touched her again. She seemed passive-aggressive for the rest of our lunch date.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:11

Clawtopsy: Dec 17, 2009; What a fascinatingly unusual cock. Now, allow me to show you my collection...

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for going against my girlfriend�s wishes to teach a homeless man how to skateboard?

I went out for lunch with my girlfriend today. We walked to a restaurant a mile from our college campus. I walked while carrying my skateboard because I use it to get across campus faster. On our way to the restaurant, a quite dirty-looking middle-aged homeless man asked me if I could teach him how to ride a skateboard. I like to stop and interact with homeless people, but my girlfriend hates being near them because she is germaphobic and is intimidated by their presence. However, this homeless man looked quite nice so I said I�ll teach him for a few minutes. My girlfriend was tugging me away and whispering me to just go.

I didn�t want to turn down the homeless man because he looked quite nice, so I put the skateboard down and held his hands while he put his feet on the skateboard. I taught him how to push off with his foot and maintain his balance. This went on for about ten minutes until I told him I had somewhere to go. He looked like he had so much fun. My girlfriend was just on her phone and giving us some nasty looks. I gave the homeless man five dollars and told him to save that up to buy his own skateboard. He thanked me profusely for the money and taking the time out my day to brighten his.

When I went over to my girlfriend, she backed away and shouted at me to keep some distance and not to touch her until I take a long shower. I talked to her about the joy I brought to the homeless man. She said that I wasted her time and he will almost certainly spend that money on alcohol or drugs and never buy a skateboard. I told her that we got plenty of time and that�s alright if he does spend it on alcohol or drugs, but I at least made someone�s life a little bit better. She said I�m extremely gullible and that he used my kindness against me to obtain more money. I told her to stop being so cynical. After we finished arguing, I went in for a kiss and she backed away and said that was off limits too until I shower. I rolled my eyes and never touched her again. She seemed passive-aggressive for the rest of our lunch date.

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# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:14

Pie Colony: Dec 8, 2006; I AM SUCH A FUCKUP THAT I CAN'T EVEN POST IN AN E/N THREAD I STARTED

Rent-A-Cop posted:

Yeah but it wasn't.

As long as nobody thinks the relationship is anything it isn't I don't see a problem. There's not any kind of weird power dynamic being explored and everyone is an adult so whatever.

What do you think the power dynamic between an older man and a younger woman actually is? Cause it's not about physical power. A 30 year old dating a 19 year old is bad. "everyone is an adult" lol

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:15

Fuck Your Website: Nov 29, 2003; FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE

quote:

Dear Prudence,
I have always tried to be a kind person. However, I have lived my adult life in a way many people would disapprove of. During the last 11 years I have been a mistress of five married men. One had a long string of previous affairs. One was a friend for whom I had much tenderness and who told me he would rather have had me. One was a three-year relationship that caused deep feelings and deep distress.

I do not regret these or the other adventures. I have not been the initiator of the affairs; the men have pursued me. Apart from one, I would not have wanted to live with these men. I do not know any of the five wives, and I am discreet.

When people discuss adultery, the cheater and the other woman are often spoken of harshly as deceivers and egoists. I have never felt like either, and have never felt guilty. Is it possible the rest of the world has a limited emotional imagination and cannot see that such affairs are meetings between two people who don�t want to hurt innocent partners, but who choose to explore their intimacy and chemistry in secret? Or have I somehow become morally crippled since I can so easily do something most people would chastise me for?

"Dear Prudie, could it be the contorted rationalizations I've fabricated to explain away my consistently terrible actions are in fact complete bullshit? Please note the only other option is that literally everyone else in the entire world is wrong."

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:16

Rent-A-Cop: Oct 15, 2004; I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

Pie Colony posted:

What do you think the power dynamic between an older man and a younger woman actually is? Cause it's not about physical power. A 30 year old dating a 19 year old is bad. "everyone is an adult" lol

They could very well both be living with their parents and working at Wawa. Who cares if they wanna Netflix and chill? I mean, they shouldn't get married, but nobody said that's happening.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:17

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Rent-A-Cop posted:

They could very well both be living with their parents and working at Wawa. Who cares if they wanna Netflix and chill? I mean, they shouldn't get married, but nobody said that's happening.

To be clear, you wouldn't have an issue if the genders were reversed, right?

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:22

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# ? May 12, 2024 12:08

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

Skateboard boyfriend reminds me of a former buddy who would wear team shirts and engage strangers in long, boring conversations about said team and their sport while we were out without any consideration for me or my time. He can get hosed.

# ? Jan 15, 2020 20:23

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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