quote:

tldr: Mom has lost all trust for me after finding out I am sexually active. She secretly checks my room and personal spaces (messages included). She has begun convincing herself of delusions.

My mom has recently been very worrying. A month ago, she had realized I am sexually active. This lead to a lot of discussions, all of which seemed to only display her disappointment in me. This disappointment was only because I didn't save until University and not much else.

Since then, she's been completely distrustful of everything I do. I've caught her flipping my room upside down looking for things, and I've found hints that my personal messages were looked through. I've explained the importance of my privacy to her, but it's tough. The same mantra is reiterated where I do not have privacy until I move out. When I speak of moving out however, this is frowned upon?

To make matters worse, she's slowly becoming delusional. It honestly worries me and I don't know what to do. Today I went to a local park to hang out with friends, but my mom thought I was being untruthful.

She saw a man that looked similar to me waiting in a bus stop 10KM away from where I really was. She fully believed this was me. Instead of asking me at that moment, she waited a few hours and decided to unexpectedly surprise me by picking me up. I was planning on staying longer but she cut that short. She accused me of lying, being nearly in tears. Saying how she is 100% confident that I am lying of where I was today, and that I was out doing nefarious things. I showed her solid evidence that I was not there at that exact moment, and proved it impossible for me to even be there. This was all denied by her

This night I stayed up a little bit. I caught her trying to enter my room with no reason at 3AM. I don't understand what I did to betray her trust like this, and I would like tips on how to regain trust

In the past month, I've been giving her detailed updates on where I am at all times. What I'm doing, who I'm with. I make sure to take videos and pictures. I've been as honest as possible and have not betrayed her trust, but she only progresses south each day.

Advice on how to help this situation, and regain trust?

CharlestheHammer posted:

Oh wait this is perfect bait for goons to feel superior, so now I get it.

Plus the trivial the better

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

PSA: If you have time and resources to spare to spend 10 bucks on posting jokes then if you show up to your dads funeral or siblings wedding in basketball shorts and and an armpit stained anime t-shirt and get kicked out instead of at least demonstrating some level of giving a poo poo but spending a few hours and dollars at a thrift store to look like you kinda tried you are probably an rear end in a top hat

Slowpoke Rodriguez posted:

Lol, dude every post you make is you trying to feel superior.

BIG-DICK-BUTT-gently caress posted:

Full disclosure: my friend is getting married and he expects us to buy black suits for it. I haven't worn a suit in years and I don't plan on wearing one after this, I'm a carpenter so I have zero need for interviews or whatever. So this strikes close to home for me

that 19 year old isn't "right" and the pragmatic thing to do would be to just suck it up for a day but really in the grand scheme wearing business casual to a wedding is insignificant. Certainly not close to ruining it or whatever, and The sister is more of an AH for holding a grudge over it.

quote:

I work as a dog groomer and I am usually pretty flexible with pick up times. I have this one client though who has been getting later and later with pick up times and for the past three times they have shown up over an hour past closing time to pick up their dogs. The first time they said it was because they forgot, the second time it was because of their kids and the third and undisclosed emergency. I let it slide all three times but the third time I warned them I wouldn't let it go this next time. Well the fourth time rolled around and the shop closes, the dogs have been at the shop all day and the owner is nowhere in sight. I sent them a message saying I will give them an extra 15 minutes before I leave and they didn't respond. After 15 minutes I told them the dogs would be at the local shelter, sent the address and the contact details of the woman in charge and took the dogs there. Well about 2 hours later I get an angry phone call this woman screaming down the phone because she has to pay to get her dogs back (I think it's like $30) and she wants to know why I took them to a shelter claiming her dogs are traumatised and I must have abused them during their groom. She slandered me over the internet and left bad reviews. I am not a pet sitter I gave her multiple chances but it seems like a lot of people are on her side.

Edit: OK I need to clear some things up. My local shelter is not over crowded and also offers boarding services. It has like 3 dogs in and I checked beforehand they said I could drop the dogs off. Plus my shelter has a 3 month stay before they ship the dogs off to a new shelter and only euthnises for behavioural issues

quote:

I (24F) am a professional Mermaid, it's an unusual job I know but I love it. I work at an Aquarium putting on shows with the other Mer and also do private events to make some extra money. My friends niece has a birthday coming up, she's turning 7 and my friend thought i'd be the ideal entertainment for the party as kids love Mermaids also her niece hasn't met me so it won't break the immersion of her recognising me.

She recommended me to her brother and sister in law and I met up with the three of them to go over what they wanted for the performance, how long it would last and my rates. I told them I would be willing to perform for two hours for £100 which shocked them as that would be £50 an hour, my friend asked me if I could cut a deal and I explained I already was they were matching the salary of the Aquarium with this and explained I actually charge £150 an hour for private events.

They tried to negotiate me down offering to pay £50 for the two hours stating i'd have as much food and drink as I wanted at the party, now after a performance i'm usually ravenous as I don't eat much before it for obvious reasons but food on top of £50 isn't enough in my opinion, not when I have to travel to get there and could have used this time to do an event at my normal rates.

I told them that wouldn't work for me and they have told me they'd need to think about it clearly not keen on the idea. My friend is unhappy with me and asked if I could just take the £50 for her sake as her niece would love it and said that as we're friends this should come before money.

I honestly feel poo poo about this, I thought it was a good deal and I hate upsetting my friend but £50 for a two hour performance is ridiculous. Should I just take it and mark this down as a loss for the sake of my friendship?

greazeball posted:

AITA for the amount I asked to perform at a birthday party?

BIG-DICK-BUTT-gently caress posted:

Full disclosure: my friend is getting married and he expects us to buy black suits for it. I haven't worn a suit in years and I don't plan on wearing one after this, I'm a carpenter so I have zero need for interviews or whatever. So this strikes close to home for me

that 19 year old isn't "right" and the pragmatic thing to do would be to just suck it up for a day but really in the grand scheme wearing business casual to a wedding is insignificant. Certainly not close to ruining it or whatever, and The sister is more of an AH for holding a grudge over it.

greazeball posted:

AITA for the amount I asked to perform at a birthday party?

Phuzzy posted:

quote:

Throwaway.

A few days ago, me and my husband went out to dinner with our daughters Anna and Mary (24 and 18), Anna's husband Tom and his parents. My husband isn't a big fan of Tom, he thinks he shows off his wealth (Tom has a very high paying job and his family is very well off too). Anna was carrying a really expensive Chanel bag, which she said Tom got her as a gift for her birthday recently. Things were going well, when my husband made a comment about how instead of buying expensive purses, Tom should've donated that money to charity. It wasn't a malicious comment, just a statement. Tom said that it was a birthday gift and he wanted to spoil her, my husband didn't say anything else and we moved on. At the end of the dinner when we were all leaving, my husband said 'imagine having so much money and not using it for good'. He said it jokingly and I laughed it off. Tom and his parents got defensive and said it's wrong of him to assume they 'don't do charity' and he shouldn't be making comments like that. Anna then said that it's none of our business and everyone left heated up.

My husband was saying after we came back home that Anna had changed after getting married into such a pretentious family. He said that he was disappointed that I hadn't supported him when he was getting attacked by Anna and Tom and as a husband expects his wife to have his back. I agreed that I should've said something to Anna, so I called her later and said that she and her new family have hurt her dad's feelings and he's a very generous man so of course he expects her to be the same. Anna got mad and said that I'm an enabler. I told her that they turned a joke into a fight and she was insulting her own family to impress her husband's.

Mary told me that both me and my husband were being unfair and rude to Anna and Tom, but I was just trying to make her see our side. AITA?

Edited - a lot of comments are saying that we're are 'insecure' of our SIL's wealth. That's honestly laughable, because my husband has a very good job/income and so do I. There's nothing to be 'jealous' of.

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

Just rent a suit for the day for a few

greazeball posted:

AITA for taking clients dogs to the shelter?

run on sentience posted:

Give me your tail!

Also sister did not dress business casual. Just casual. And I call bullshit that she doesn't own anything business casual if she works at a corporate law firm. It's not just about the clothes. It's that she could not do an incredibly simple thing to show respect for her sister for one day.

DreamingofRoses posted:

She literally had to spend a noticeable portion of an already super-stressful day begging the venue to let her sister in because basic directions or requirements are hard for 19 year olds. I’d be pretty pissed a week later too.

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

Lol that “don’t wear your crusty hoodie to a wedding” is a controversial opinion

Piell posted:

AITA for telling my daughter that she hurt her dad's feelings?

The Moon Monster posted:

This is the thread that had a multi-page meltdown over "don't order a pizza to a dinner party".

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

Lol that “don’t wear your crusty hoodie to a wedding” is a controversial opinion

CharlestheHammer posted:

Ah another thing I’m not shocked goons had a lot of opinions on rather than who cares the objectively correct opinion

Because goons live talking about food

CharlestheHammer posted:

Oh wait this is perfect bait for goons to feel superior, so now I get it.

Plus the trivial the better

Alchenar posted:

look man I just came from a hard day's work at the carpentry shop where I was carpentering myself a cart to carry my huge sense of moral superiority, I don't got not time to be dressing up all fancy

greazeball posted:

AITA for taking clients dogs to the shelter?

quote:

AITA for the amount I asked to perform at a birthday party?

keep punching joe posted:

Everyone should own a decent quality black suit. Always handy to have for any weddings/funerals/jewelry store heists.

Captain Hygiene posted:

I wish I could jump in with a funny reddit story but I've been looking and they're all boring and dumb today. I think they used up all the wild stories yesterday morning.

BIG-DICK-BUTT-gently caress posted:

Full disclosure: my friend is getting married and he expects us to buy black suits for it. I haven't worn a suit in years and I don't plan on wearing one after this, I'm a carpenter so I have zero need for interviews or whatever. So this strikes close to home for me

Midnight Voyager posted:

Uh, they say he does it because he "wants to start a fight" and "wants to bother them." Without having more info, it sounds like an abusive situation where parents are trying to obliterate every ounce of his personal space and privacy.

quote:

I literally found this sub 2 seconds ago by accident and just knew there’d someone who appreciated this story.

This happened about 3 years ago, I was living with my dad before moving out, this is in central Texas a little north of Austin on a county road, my family had lived there for almost 30 years long before any thought of a neighborhood even existed. We have our 2 gate posts painted purple, which means keep out, for anyone who doesn’t know. And we kept the gate dummy locked to avoid unwanted guests. The most recent neighborhood at that time had a rather strict HOA that luckily up until that point we had the pleasure of never dealing with as we lived 2 miles down the road from the back entrance to said neighborhood. One day on my day off while my dad was at work I heard a knock at the door and looked through the peephole to see a woman in her mid 40’s dressed like a business woman. I assumed it was someone offering to buy the property as we live on 20 acres. I opened the door and she said “I’m blah blah blah with the (neighborhood) HOA, I just wanted to speak to the property owner about the purple posts, it doesn’t really match the aesthetic of the neighborhood.” I was loving lost, I started to talk and then was left speechless and this bitch says “can you speak?” In the most cunty tone I’d ever heard. And I said “lady, purple posts mean keep out and that gate was dummy locked, idk how long you’ve been in Texas but your actions in the past 5 minutes would’ve counted as a signed death wish to a lot of people on this county road, including my dad. We’re not apart of your stupid rear end HOA, we live 2 loving MILES down the road from it and if we want to spray paint our trees red and grass blue, we can. So turn around, close the gate behind you and gently caress off.” She started to talk so I slammed the door in her face and watched her leave from the window. Few months later a friend of mine moved into that neighborhood and told me that my dad and his property is regularly posted on their Facebook page as “unfriendly and dangerous”.

Anyways, I hope someone gets a laugh, and I’m so glad I found this sub

quote:

I, (28M), am married to my wife (26F) and we’ve just recently had a baby (10 months old).

My mom out of the blue a couple of weeks ago told me about this Condo that had a good deal on it for her, me, my wife and baby, to go to for a week. I immediately booked it and told my wife about it later. She was fine with it although a little upset we’d have to miss a family wedding.

We have two dogs that we can’t kennel due to one of them being dog aggressive, which is fine. My brother usually watches them when we go on vacation. My mom asked my brother if he wanted to go on vacation and he said no and that he would watch the dogs.

Fast forward to last week my wife got sick and as our departure date was getting closer, she was afraid she wasn’t gonna be able to go. She called my mom to let her know that if she wasn’t feeling better by Friday, she couldn’t go so if she wanted to see if someone else might be able to step in that would be fine JUST IN CASE.

Well, my mom mentioned this to my brother and he said he would go if she couldn’t. Thursday she started to feel a lot better but when I told my mom, my brother was now adamant about going. He refused to watch the dogs and said he was gonna go.

So now we were stuck because on such short notice, we couldn’t find anyone else to watch the dogs. I had already booked the condo (my mom was gonna pay me back for it) and I didn’t want to lose the money.

Long story short, I ended up going and left my wife and baby at home. My wife wasn’t happy about it and my daughter has been having trouble sleeping for a couple weeks so she’s been dealing with that by herself.

Her family and friends are calling me the AH for leaving them but even though my mom would have paid me back for the condo, I didn’t want to miss out. I feel bad for leaving them but my wife has family that can help her and I don’t wanna lose money. AITA?

Arsenic Lupin posted:

This is outside our usual haunts, but.
Telling the HOA to eat rear end.

Several people in the comments agree that, yeah, if you go through the gate without permission, you're likely to get shot. Welp. Hope you aren't stuck with a flat tire.

keep punching joe posted:

Everyone should own a decent quality black suit. Always handy to have for any weddings/funerals/jewelry store heists.