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syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

The narthex is like a lobby to a cathedral

Catholic church had ties with nazis and pedos

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syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

I had a friend decide they wanted to extend their kitchen window a few feet in both directions and they just sort of sawzalled a huge chunk out of the side of their house. How dumb is this compared to bathtub goon? Because we still give them poo poo for having to redo basically the entire side of their house.

They are both pretty dumb but even if they'd finished putting in the bath over that then they'd likely be out a working bathroom in short order. Hole in the exterior wall and lack of support for the roof and upper floor(s) is more critical.

Now if the bathroom is on a second story

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Beachcomber posted:

Thank you, it didn't even occur to me that sugar would have an LD50.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Powaqoatse posted:

ack that thing is very impolite

I googled it and the links made me want to Google my schmeckle

Oy vey

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Collateral Damage posted:

Putting someone on ignore should automatically put any quote by them in a spoiler block as well.

Just write a greasemonkey script

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Karate Bastard posted:

Maybe if you fuckers'd learn to be not so obnoxious and wrong all the goddamn time it would be possible to talk to you without first getting some kinda hosed up specialist training in being compatible with the wrong and irrelevant have you thought about that huh huh huh? huh? Huh?

The funny thing is imagining the guy from Office Space being the only one who can liaise with the engineers.

I DEAL WITH THE GOD drat CUSTOMERS!

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

RagnarokAngel posted:

Also why are they examining a document after a man choked on a hot dog, very suspect.

Have you seen who they're appointing judges of hot dog-eating contests these days? A lot of them are none too bright along with being pretty biased.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

doverhog posted:

Cheese is great. It's also good for you, because it's protein and fat. There is no more misguided food "trend" than the one saying dairy is bad for you.

It's an old one but really brainwashed into some people. Fat is bad for you because fat instead of the simpler reality that excessive calorie consumption makes it so your body creates fat.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Heath posted:

Is Cougar Gold what they call it when you've got a wealthy sugar mama?

You like? I like

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

Ah, the seldom heard of Fourth Richelieu.

I'd take a neutral view of this kind of cheesy wordplay but my backstory is full of holes.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

I'd love to see some classic goonin'.

Yeah we think people make awfull posts now but some of the one that get quoted as "x came out of the closet to post" are a hoot.

I can't remember if this thread has just dumped all the Granos thread yet (it's almost certainly in the goldmine and free to view even without archives right?) but there are a couple of those that are extremely choice.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

heh

it's funny because smoka keeps coming back

and i miss when he's gone but i know he needed to take one for the team





*is literally watching gits at this hot second*

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Neddy Seagoon posted:

Now all we need is some chicken and we'll be in business.

*revs halftrack*

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:

this makes my skin crawl

anyway i guess i'd better get used to it, as now we only have pick; avshalom is gone. it's like only having access to lovely weird canned cheese instead of the good stuff

avshalom is gone?

i mean good for her but bad for us

funny how that always happens

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Malachite_Dragon posted:

Av shouldn't have kept loving around with threatening the president, then :shrug: I hate trump too but Lowtax already been visited by the Secret Service once.

Probably more than once and since he's closed the office they might be at his house which is loads of fuckedupedness

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Rough Lobster posted:

Goddamn this is a good post.

It reads like that old Zack Parson's article where Oprah Winnifred is secretly eating everyone.

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe
e: ^^^ he did

Nanomashoes posted:

It's not as if the Obama post isn't derivative of Pynchon anyways.

Pirate Priebus

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Trig Discipline posted:

Well hello there! Yeah that was my thing. I'm currently working on another one based on Dan Carlin podcasts.

It's the story of the 2020 election, in which Trump declares himself to be the messiah and destroys America. It's a slow burn for the first few chapters but by chapter five there are going to be mandatory congressional orgies which break down into cannibalism along party lines. Not sure how it ends yet but I'm thinking nukes will be involved. Chapters 1and 3 are the only ones with rough drafts of Mussorgsky far. 2 and 4 have nearly final words music to come shortly.

Chapter 1

Chapter 3

Mussorgsky was supposed to be "music so", but it's weird enough that I'm just going to leave it.

How much of the sound engineering do you do vs. writing the script? Any illustrators in mind?

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe
Ahahaha, in chapter three at about 3:45

I'm dying

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe
just call it profit and loss.jpg

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Trig Discipline posted:

Prophet, surely

yeah but if they see a file name as boring as what i suggested they'll assume it's porn and delicately sell you a story about some nebulous supervisor and then offer to swap you infrared nipple pics

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Trig Discipline posted:

But once congress starts having massive public orgies and then eating each other

sometimes I forget how long you've been gone trig but you're going to need to step it up to keep pace with reality

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

kemikalkadet posted:

Hell yeah bro, in fact I've got a personal story of me and my bro.

Me and my best bro used to play this game where we suck each others' dicks and call the person who cums first a fag. I usually win because my bro's never been all that great at cocksucking, and when he jizzes in my mouth, I make him finish me off then give him a passionate kiss so he has to swallow both loads. Then I berate him for the next hour or so about what a total fag he is.

But this one time, we were 69ing like normal, and I could tell my bro was getting really close to orgasm. I wasn't quite there yet, but I hear him whimper around my cock and it really gets to me. So I decide to take pity on my bro and slow way down, only gently stroking him and planting a tender kiss every now and again. Sure enough, I cum first and then finish him off and swallow. And then he looks over at me and plants a wet one right on my lips. I feel my own salty jizz slide into my mouth and swallow it happily. He breaks the kiss after a good while, looks me right in the eyes, says "...Fag" and punches me on the arm as hard as he can.

We cuddle naked for a while after that. I smile as he holds me in his strong arms and tells me what a colossal loving human being I am. I "agree" and laugh along with him, sometimes giving him another kiss or two. When it's finally time for me to leave (had to go to my girlfriend's birthday party), my bro gives me the biggest bro hug he's ever given and says "Thanks, bro." I tell him it's no big deal and that it was the least I could do for a bro as awesome as him.

I think we've become even better bros since then. I don't let that fucker win our game anymore, though. He's such a fag, goddamn.

Can I call username post combo here?

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe
:sweatdrop:

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Chichevache posted:

Speaking of hot mods, is Shine still here?

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe
Well I miss Debbie Metallica

She dove right into some pyf ugly selfies thread like a champ

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Hugoon Chavez posted:

I think all goons are hot.

Except me :smith:

edit: oh, and this guy.

That guy's a fucker

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Hogge Wild posted:

ha, i made my first report in that thread

yr a treasure

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

RagnarokAngel posted:

That's not how cancer works homes.

Cancer can be transmissible if you're incredibly inbred, like the Tasmanian Devil

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Subjunctive posted:

Are there any other signs of stroke?

Looking at that thing I get the feeling that some some of the disconnect is because cars have different names in different countries.

Stephen King had a whole made up world (coming soon to a theater near you) that had different names for car brands and cola that just really hosed with your head.

Kinda like england really

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

FactsAreUseless posted:

But it is pretty hosed up to think that by creating Slenderman, Something Awful ruined horror on the internet for 200 years.

it was just a few people who did this horrible thing

it's like saying Mike Nelson is a goon (technically he is)

or that woman who made funny webcomics

or that guy who made awful videogames

all technically goons but it's not a good descriptor

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

That and the Fragmaster(?) posts about his mangled dick are my favorite on topic derails of all time. I can never find the dick one though. Anyone got a link to that one? I think at one point he was talking about how it's all lumpy and misshapen and he would try to masturbate by rubbing a toothbrush on a spongy part of it that could still feel sensation. And that it was the size of two hotdog buns, but not end to end.

I'd also like to see that, even though I'm not really familiar with it at all. However I think Kirk (and later Smythe) had the best genital mutilation posts

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3459842

kirk one there

smythe idk even the search terms

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

Found it! It was David Thorpe not Fragmaster:

http://www.somethingawful.com/news/my-genitals/1/

edit:
I could have sworn it was a post in a thread first, but maybe I'm remembering incorrectly.


g4 one here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdUHDDj7fhk

syscall girl has a new favorite as of 06:09 on Jun 27, 2017

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

holy crap

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

mind the walrus posted:

drat that was a solid roll with the punch considering.

making up some vague other thread where we could have a reasonable discussion?

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

mind the walrus posted:

It's a passive-aggressive deflection about a really serious problem that sounds almost professional out of context. That's distinctly Canadian and I appreciate the twisted grace of it.

That spin balances my tires the way only Canadian Tires can. Really well, I'd guess.



(poster should be sentenced to make the thread about first nations and respond to every poster in a sincere and polite manner)

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

I still rock a Skinny Puppy shirt from 1993. I'm with ya old music liking buddy.

I have been in and out of love with Skinny Puppy since the late 90s.

Sometimes they annoy me and other times they like totally speak to my soul, man

syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Outrail posted:

On a long enough timeline....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KenuH94YKaE

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syscall girl
Nov 7, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Fun Shoe

Kay Kessler posted:

Friendly reminder that canonically Spider-man's jizz gives people cancer.

Him and Doctor Manhattan.

Superman would not be a good partner for a normie either

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFE92ygRyac

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