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Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

President Beep posted:

how the gently caress can someone be familiar with rage against the machine and not immediately see that they're leftists. guess it's another example of the "born in the usa" phenomenon

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Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Video Nasty posted:

Q: What do rednecks do to celebrate Halloween?

A: They pump kin. :haw:

a panhandler in Alabama told me this joke so I gave him more money than I was planning on

uh shameful snipe. i live in Florida and the other day I was driving past a bunch of trumpers who were standing partially in the lane waving giant trump flags and my wife, who is a person of color, flipped them off while kinda hanging out the window (it feels good ok) and at least twice someone yelled the n word at her. gently caress this place

Fart Sandwiches fucked around with this message at 12:24 on Oct 31, 2020

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
stay safe out there everyone. I’m gonna try to keep off the firehose of info to keep my sanity but I know I’m just gonna end up doom scrolling all day

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

PIZZA.BAT posted:

was and yeah

https://twitter.com/KyleKulinski/status/1323699646712131586

he's struggling to even put together a trump-like sentence

what are you talking about he was very strong in his talk of viggdery

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
glad I went to sleep instead of following this shitshow. hi 5 to all the sleepers out there time traveling their way through the election

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

My dad wanted me to get my ham license. I never did because he was always talking with old racists.

Reflects poorly on my dad, I think

was gonna post this literal fuckin post. I had flash cards and everything but I just bombed the test on purpose.

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Jonny 290 posted:

I've got zero problem with enlisted for those reasons. There are two ways out of a blue collar Arkansas upbringing - either you get a tech job and move, or you enlist and move. Those kids are just trying to get out of Judsonia, Arkansas.

I enlisted out of Mississippi and through a series of unfortunate events they taught me how to write code and now I have a tech job. the ultimate success story! just don’t talk about the ptsd, the abusive ex wife, and various physical ailments (I can’t hear and it sucks rear end!) that I, and many others like me, have to deal with

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Sagebrush posted:

To be clear I don't think that Democrats are good at the economy or anything, but you can look at stuff like Obama inheriting the subprime mortgage crisis and being immediately blamed for it, then turning the country around just in time for Trump to take credit.

Nobody is actually good at the economy. It should probably be abolished

it’s cool our economic system is just accepting the boom bust cycle like wel what can you do

in conclusion ,capitalism.... bad?

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Jonny 290 posted:

he didnt order off the value menu because he's a savvy shopper

he ordered things he knew because he's illiterate and can't read an actual menu and also doesnt have a sense of what it is to like or dislike a food. he just fills his maw

stop reading my third person autobigraphy

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Xaris posted:



trump lost 2020 because he stopped campaigning like 2016. he was acting like a failed loser in 2020: vote for MEEEE illl keep america great, fake hoax virus fake news trying to take me down, and whining like a lib. if he had stuck to how he campaigned in 2016 which is talking about how much hes going to smash nafta and the libs, hes going to own china, hes going to bring back more farms and manufacturing, hes going to revive the car industry, more walls! he probably would have won.

this is also because in 16 he didn’t expect to win, just trying to ride that grift train, and this year he desperately wanted to win, and after spending 4 years complaining that’s all he knew how to do. what a Fuckin wimp

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Mr. Nice! posted:

that's not really a big deal, tbh, and just takes cutting them a check. eventually your license will be put on permanent hold and it will cost more to reactivate it, but that's usually it.

what are bar dues anyway, :10bux:?

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

Bush set in motion events that killed over a million Iraqi and Afghan civilians because we were mad about what, ~3000 lost in 9/11?

Trump let 300K+ Americans die because he thought a pandemic would only affect people in places that didn't vote for him.

trump might get his bodycount in the millions if you count his irresponsible handling as causing it to spread more far and wide than it would have in a less lovely timeline

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
I order out way too much because I have a 8 month old and no familial help because of pandemic (mother in law just tested negative after some necessary emergency flights so she can come over and help... finally). I love cooking tho so of course I tried blue apron to see if that was worth it at all and it is not. I’d rather just order out than cook some half rear end meal from them.

I do make a home cooked lunch/breakfast almost every day tho.

also re: giving back, me and my dad used to go to the local soup kitchens that would do holiday meal boxes and deliver them to people around thanksgiving and Christmas. I hated it because I was a miserable teen but it was actually something nice to do for people and I’m probably going to do it with my kid later on.

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Jonny 290 posted:

Bowling for Pholumbine

lmao

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Sagebrush posted:

yeah i've been cooking 2-3 meals a day for most of the pandemic and it's been great actually. good food and cheaper. but the two biggest things i have learned are

1) you can never have too much counter space
2) you just never loving stop cleaning the kitchen, holy poo poo

abc

a always
b be
c cleaning the loving kitchen

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
I got in trouble on a church trip because I had aenima and was letting people listen to it at the back of the bus. they said I was letting satan into people’s minds.

I wish I had done more for satan back then

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

flakeloaf posted:

https://twitter.com/GeoRebekah/status/1336065787900145665

normal country, where a scientist who refuses to misrepresent covid numbers for ron desantis has her house raided

I saw her interview on cnn and she said they only took her phone and her laptop with all her business and comms. would a state level agency have the resources to bust into one of those? would the feds give them help?

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Doc Block posted:

the hosed up part is that it doesn’t even actually work that way.

apparently, any senator can force a bill to be voted on, specifically to prevent this kind of BS, but the democrat senators don’t because it would ~Violate Norms~ and Chuck Schumer would be mad

that’s real hosed up

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

bump_fn posted:

boris johnson could go on tv and say “gently caress you you worms. you eat dirt now. you’re trash and you deserve this.” and every newspaper would talk about how dignified he is in the face of adversity and all of the ham faced home county dads would cry as they think about teh queen

outrageously cucked country you have no idea

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Poopernickel posted:

I think it's super weird that Christians talk about god's wants and desires

like, assuming that motherfucker exists outside of space and time - how could anybody presume to understand what god is thinking? Who even knows if thinking/thoughts are even an applicable concept?

It's the highest arrogance for us to assume that god's mental processes is at all similar to what our meat brains do

but you see, we were created in His image, therefore the way we are is the way He is beep boop

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Poopernickel posted:

we are trapped by linear existence

can somebody tell me how do I get out of this chickenshit existence

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

mediaphage posted:

depends on how hateful he gets post office. jackie boy might decide it would generate more traffic to ban him which is the only metric that matters. ain’t holdin my breath tho.

the “heritage” and also “culture” on that dumb as gently caress space force logo really rubs me the wrong way

culture: Constitution

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

EIDE Van Hagar posted:

Monaco: home of the haves and the have yachts

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
hey Jonny I will buy a ham radio from you. I had my license when I was 12 cause my dad was a radio guy, like climbing towers to put up antenna and lights and poo poo, and I wanna either get back into it so I can relate to old man or give it as a gift. so if you're selling some random stuff link the SA Mart thread already

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

AnimeIsTrash posted:

The body dysmorphia is very real. I still do the fat person shirt tug and feel incredibly uncomfortable when clothes fit just right instead being 2 sizes bigger.

edit

https://youtu.be/VxDozuzfVuY

edit2 if something fits nicely I feel like I can't breathe because I got so used to wearing tents

Fart Sandwiches fucked around with this message at 20:13 on Dec 30, 2020

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

Sandy Hook was the end of any meaningful discussion about gun control ever, a society that will accept the murder of children will accept anything.

this but it's a Christian saying it and about abortion

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

There's literally zero biblical reason for Christians to oppose abortion though

ya but it won't stop them from talking about it as if it were literally child murder while neglecting to do anything about the actual real child murder

I should edit that post to read [modern] or [American] Christian

how do i turn off autocomplete for these words i give no deference to intentionally

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
hope is a lie etc etc but wow what a nice way to wake up at 530 am. 2021 starting off pretty deece

not that I expect a 50/50 split senate to get anything done for real, I just really hate Mitch McConnell

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

The Fool posted:

I still have a Facebook account because it’s basically the only way to keep in touch with a bunch of extended family


also, Facebook marketplace is way better than Craigslist

I thought the same thing but I severed from fb and started texting the people I really wanted to stay in touch with AND I don’t have to read a buncha broke brained idiots posting insane drivel.

if you sell enough poo poo that keeping marketplace is a driving factor go for it I guess

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Jonny 290 posted:

its the only way my racist idiot relatives will respond to me because they can get Likes on their posts to my wall advising me that donald trump is geotus and liberals are cucks! What else am i gonna do?

this but with people I used to be close friends with :smith:

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Kenny Logins posted:

lol

i've had some further success dropping pounds so far in 2021, prayers up to all who share this sacred quest. it's been a loving crazy couple of weeks

it’s great when stress and anxiety cause you not to eat so instead of getting a bit tubby I become malnourished and weak. i love food and love to eat so this sucks. I ate too much ramen and threw it all up the other day thanks hellwoeld

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

PokeJoe posted:

same, i used to eat out pretty much daily at my old job for lunch but now i just don't eat lunch at all over half of the days of the week because i have no appetite until roughly 6pm

just tell people you are intermittent fasting

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

qirex posted:

the real bad roman emperors [commodus, nero, caligula] are still pretty well known, in fact they're more famous than all the non-lovely ones except for og ceasar

none of them had delicious dressing named after them

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Jim Silly-Balls posted:

love to protect chud idiots for no reason

all cops are bastards but using them to gently caress over chuds is a pretty good use of their bastardy

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

so when one of his exes winds up dead with his gun this is proof it was totally stolen!

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

SmokaDustbowl posted:

press alt f4 to reload parler

type disco in the console to make crazy lights happen

this definitely didn’t happen to me in tfc

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

North America is still bad.

it's very bad

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Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
A childhood friend's dad struck it rich by writing some slot machine software and licensing it to major casinos (I don't remember the details this was over 25 years ago) and they went from getting chain-evicted from trailers to living the good life (in mississippi). The dad ended up cheating with the new housekeeper they could now afford and hosed off to somewhere else and set his family up nice at least. The kids became total snobs overnight

See, gambling can have a happy ending

edit: i just remembered the youngest became a volunteer firefighter and was the kind of person who would set fires to go put it out and be the hero. cool family

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