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Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Pillowpants posted:

I think I'm going to boycott Showtime and anything Scott Buck does for the rest of his life after this ends.

Just boycott Scott Buck. It's only Showtime's fault insofar as they employed him, they can still make other shows that are good.

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Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

deafmute posted:

Great, now my mind has to imagine what Kurt Sutter's version of Dexter would look like and how he'd manage to force the audience to watch him beat off in the context of the show :smith:

I don't even know who he is, thankfully.

Dexter's Final Cut is now read, and it was well worth doing. It's impossible to read in any other way but as contemptuous of the ruin that the show has become. It's also so good to see Dexter as an actual psychopath again instead of an angst-ridden antihero.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Paradox Personified posted:

I thought it wasn't out until the 17th?

It's been out in the UK since Thursday.

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Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Caros posted:

Also, because I was curious, I went and did some fun math today!

According to a bunch of people with too much time on their hands Dexter has killed 132 people, more or less. If that seems like a lot of people, it is! The highest body count for a US serial killer is the green river killer at 49, followed by Bundy at 35, and Gacy at 33. In fact, Dexter's confirmed kill count is number two in confirmed victims!

Now keep in mind that most of the people Dexter has killed are themselves killers. Most of them are guilty of multiple homicides, and when we factor in people like Brian who have multiple murders on their hands, to even out Dexter's impulse/necessity kills, I think it'd be fair to say that for every person he kills, they have themselves killed two others. So about 264.

Miami averages 73 homicides per year. This means that the people Dexter has killed would account for three and a half years worth of all murders in Miami. More to the point, just under half of Dexter's kills have taken place in the four years his son has been alive.

Unsurprisingly, by that math, Dexter has killed roughly half of all murderers in Miami since the death of his wife.

In book 7 Dexter thinks that he has 53 slides in his rosewood box. That's only people he's killed by ritual, though. So less ridiculous, but still #1 overall.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Cojawfee posted:

I went on youtube to listen to Make Your Own Kind Of Music because it's a good song and saw this:


I didn't know Dexter was using that song as its anthem. Why are youtubers so stupid?

You don't get to accuse anyone of being stupid when you just admitted to reading YouTube comments.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

So, when do we start talking about the undoubtedly lovely spinoff series? The Breaking Bad spinoff, that is, I don't think we dare talk about a Dexter spinoff.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Happy Noodle Boy posted:

Ah, so Dexter's bridge equivalent would be the Tacoma Narrows bridge.

More like the Ashtabula Bridge Disaster. Not only was Ashtabula the worst disaster of its kind at the time, it got rid of a perfectly competent writer and inspired some of the worst writing ever seen.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Boyd posted:

1) Dexter's gratuitous voice-over approached singularity this week as it announced I HAVE TO HIDE EVIDENCE as he hides evidence. Computers continue to make kickass sounds. The Delete function sounds like a kitten purring backwards.

That's what a crosscut paper shredder sounds like. The one place where actual research was done, but hey - better than nothing!

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

LeJackal posted:

Christ, what is wrong with that federal marshal guy that he doesn't watch the drat news and is unaware of horrible murderous suspects?

Looks like he's dead, to me, but that's just a layman's diagnosis.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Me in Reverse posted:

"loving Dexter" is the shorter and most apropos statement.

New thread title, please. We deserve it for the finale.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Rageaholic Monkey posted:

The second to last episode ever of Breaking Bad is wayyyyyyyy more important than the last episode ever of Dexter. No way in hell am I watching this live :colbert:

I just started watching Breaking Bad, and it's loving terrible. I can't believe that anyone could criticise Dexter's plotting after Nah, just messing with you, it's good enough to keep watching past S1. I don't see it as worthy of the raves it's getting, though. No spoilers, please, but what do people find so amazing about it?

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Genderfluid posted:

it's going to be dexter, just set in argentina. the show will be called ĦDexter!

Sounds reasonable, every fucker uses Apple tat in this show.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Declan MacManus posted:

Hannibal comes out on DVD this week. Good palate cleanser if you're into that.

It's out now in the UK, if anyone else is here.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

King Vidiot posted:

"We don't read books"

-- The writers of a show based on a series of books. That's all you need to say.

I reiterate: read book 7 if you want to know what this season should have been.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The TV IV > Dexter: Tonight's The Night

Come on, let's at least give the show its due for providing three years of good entertainment, even if it wasn't in this decade.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Jesus, I'm glad that's over. I can't say anything else. There's nothing else to say.

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Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Hobo Clown posted:

"Oh yeah? Well if the show's so bad how come it's breaking ratings records?" :smug:

If car accidents are so bad, how come people stop to watch?

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