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Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



gradenko_2000 posted:

We're gonna get another LBJ biopic except it's a metaphor for Biden

And then an FDR biopic except it's a metaphor for Biden

And then a Woodrow Wilson biopic... you get the idea

Eventually looping back around to a Trump biopic, but it's a metaphor for Biden

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Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Egg Moron posted:

drat right, everyone knows that if you've got eggs, someone is trying to eat them, so secure your poo poo or it's getting ate, girlboss

Smash Yoda eat the eggs

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Falukorv posted:

Whats the issue some of you have with moviebob? Know next to nothing about the guy besides him being a critic and vaguely recognizing his twitter profile. Feels like im missing some context but im always up for some gossip.

He's basically every possible stereotype of a bad nerd rolled into one, from living in a basement, to wearing a fedora, to mindlessly defending old video games from his childhood as the best thing ever, to creepily trying to be an "ally" to gamer women in the hopes that they will reward him with sex...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fXqydQOz2o

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Teriyaki Hairpiece posted:

Gilliam turned a book that was about serious stuff and also drugs into a movie about drugs.

I disagree. The movie version of Fear & Loathing is about what a privileged shithead Thompson is, how he abuses the working class without even thinking of the consequences, and is as much a contributor to the problems of the world as the people he blames.

Right at the beginning, he completely ignores the waiter who brings him the phone while leaving, while the waiter follows insisting that Thompson pay his bill, and gets a door in his face for the trouble. He steals the rental car guy's pen, after demonstrating that he has no regard for the vehicle he's renting. Just look at how much he steals from, destroys, or otherwise abuses the hotels. Working class people will have to clean up after him. As much as Thompson feels comradere with Christopher Meloni's hotel clerk abusing the little amount of power he has over the police chief, Thompson is ultimately a much bigger problem in terms of what the clerk will end up having to deal with later. Are Thompson's small scale thefts and abuses of people really all that much better or more morally permissable than the larger scale ones perpetraited by the people he criticzes? Does his being an artist and writer excuse his treatment of the working class?

Or, just watch the bit near the end in the diner, where, ignoring the guy outside getting beaten by the police, Dr. Gonzo sexually harasses, threatens, and terrorizes the waitress, just because he can. This woman isn't "The Man" or some rich entitled rear end in a top hat. She's someone who has had a very hard life, and is just trying to get by. Thompson could say something. He could do something. But instead, he just lets the abuse happen, and then slinks off while she stands there crying, nearly stealing his dinner plate, until he feels too ashamed to actually walk off with it and returns it, one of the only times he doesn't steal something when presented with the opportunity. This time what we see isn't funny; how must all those earlier times in the film must have looked from the victim's perspective?

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Marx Was A Lib posted:

Kesha > Gaga, and I'll go to the mat on that.

This is the correct opinion

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008




I hate this kind of disability rent seeking.

"What do you mean there's autistic people in the movie? I'm not in it!"

And in the last reply here, she's so close to getting it, but then woosh!

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Wraith of J.O.I. posted:

seems like the natural endpoint of that line of reasoning is that it’s wrong for actors to play anyone marginally different from themselves

Yeah. It seems sometimes like some folks legitimately don't understand what acting is, and need it explained in terms of, like, Sir Ian McKellen from Extras

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyoWmkhRyp8

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Declan MacManus posted:

the parasocial relationship you form with the "talent" playing the game

Ding ding ding!

There must be some sinister reason why (person I like on the show) won't replace (person I don't like on the show) with me. I would do a better job, be funnier, and then we'd all have a big pizza party once the game was over and go back to the big house where we all live together and stay up late watching movies and talking about our feelings

It's rather like that one scene from Joker:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5pHlbwmpzg

Or, uh, that other scene from Joker:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbliHNs4q14






(Also, rude tales of magic is much, much better)

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Marx Was A Lib posted:

"no, actually, imagine dragons is good!"

I heard their style once described as "music that makes your cousin who didn't finish high school want to join the army" and, uh, yeah. I think that checks out.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Ghost Leviathan posted:

One thing that generation of posters never understood is that clout is non-transferable between platforms

And I'm serious, a major problem with the wokescold types is not understanding that being respected for saying the correct opinions in one venue does not transfer to other places who have different assumptions and no more reason to listen to you than any other internet rando. Hence why they cannibalise each other; the only real targets they can actually claim.

Similarly, the ability to write Correct Opinions does not translate into the ability to write entertaining narratives. And this is in YA, where the bar for "good writing" is set about as low as possible.

quote:

Mandalorian Chat

I like this show because it's Star Wars QAnon.

The Child has been procured by the Empire/Deep State to be harvested for midichlorians/adrenochrome, and only a secret society of violent religious zealots can save him and stop the villains from succeeding.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



mastershakeman posted:

I've said for ages that the reason iron man resonated so well is it's a movie that says "what if we can win in the middle east, by doing it right this time and only shooting the bad guys"

Wow, yeah. That's not even subtle, now that you point it out.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/OrdinaryPlaintiveFishingcat-mobile.mp4

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Atrocious Joe posted:

i wonder how many of relatively high ranking people who work at disney/lucasfilm/marvel have fallen for their own marketing about how powerful and important their stories and brands are

if people who work at the US state department and pentagon can believe the US really does spread Democracy around the world, some management at Disney must really believe in protecting the Magical Kingdom

The podcast Behind the Bastards did a great episode about Elon Musk, detailing what a loving weird person he is, how much of a jerk he is to everyone he knows, and how he absolutely has bought into his own myths.

Back in the 90s, he would pull 16+ hour days to work on what he considered the most important thing in existence, and demanded that his employees do the same, because they were working on the most important project in human history, which would revolutionize the world and Change Everything.

This company, Zip2, was basically stupid internet yellow pages.

He continues to use this same "energy" to underpay people working in lovely conditions at his current companies, because they're "changing the world" and "forging the future" etc. etc. And it doesn't seem to be a cynical grab, he does seem to genuinely believe that what he's doing is important because he is the protagonist of history. It just so happens that doing this allows him to be a bastard as a result. A sincere and genuine rear end in a top hat is still an rear end in a top hat.

Similarly, I absolutely believe that the folks at Disney are huffing their own farts, and using that energy to get people working for them who "would do it for free" because "they love the company and what it stands for".

See also, comic companies, education start ups, gaming companies... Basically any company that uses enthusiasm for the medium and/or abstract social good in lieu of pay.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



gradenko_2000 posted:

Isn't Adam Baldwin a huge chud

It's difficult to overstate how much of a chud he is







Roy Moore, you'll probably remember, is a ephebophile pedophile. So much so, in fact, that the sexual abuse allegations against him have their own wikipedia page: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Moore_sexual_misconduct_allegations

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Atrocious Joe posted:

The way big 2 comics are run seems so ridiculous to me. They essentially operate as ways to beta test new storylines and characters for Disney and Warner Bros. brands, but they are also still tied to a monthly release schedules and expected to turn a profit. It's not far removed from a movie studio expecting their storyboard artists to be profitable in their own right at this point.

The actual writers and artists seem to know the industry better. Lots of creator owned comics are just pitches to turn the IP into TV shows and movies. Even though there are less resources behind those products, they are still often higher quality than big 2 comics. The creators know that a better pitch will make it a little more likely to be picked up for adaptation.

I think some of this is because it's a legacy industry. Marvel and DC Comics are written and drawn by people who really want to be doing it, love the characters, etc. which leaves them ripe for exploitation in the same way that working for Tesla or Google does other folks.

And, of course, because they are capitalist edifaces run on pure cynicism, folks get churned out and left to die while the bosses rake in the big bucks.

https://archive.nytimes.com/www.nytimes.com/library/national/010900edlife-56-edu.html?hc_location=ufi

https://www.comicsbeat.com/comics-creator-william-messner-loebs-is-homeless-and-working-as-a-janitor-in-michigan/

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg-UDMMHG_A

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2BvLbnUKdo

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008




For those not really into Greek/Egyptian/Macedonian etc. history, Cleopatra VII Philopator was a member of the Ptolemaic dynasty.

When Alexander the Great died in 323 BC, his three best Macedonian buds carved up his empire, and his librarian friend Ptolemy I Soter ended up dictator of Egypt. His descendants ruled Egypt until about 300 years later, when Cleopatra sold the country to the Roman Empire and offed herself. The Ptolemies were famously incestuous and inbred, to the point where scientific papers have been written about the effects this had on their bodies: https://thorax.bmj.com/content/58/3/281.3

So, for those who have put two and two together, it's a perfect casting choice for a patriotic Israeli woman to play the white inbred dictator of a conquered indigenous people

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Some Guy TT posted:

tone always trumps text in what passes for the zeitgeist these days so im not even slightly surprised that its been described as it has been

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDCP8m78FhQ

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Wraith of J.O.I. posted:

when did art/culture criticism get so loving bad? it’s just awful seeing poo poo like this and all the stuff (implicitly if not explicitly) arguing depiction == endorsement

Basically, I think it began when the trend of emotional reactions remaining unexamined and media criticism being reduced to a series of bullet points that needed to be checked off to be acceptable (what Eve Sedgwick called "Good Dog/Bad Dog" criticism) hit critical mass.

I recall reading an interesting essay about five years back where a black professor was trying to teach a Sex in Film class. She had a very interesting exercise set up where they would read an essay, then watch parts of Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song, which features, among other things, the main character, as a child, being raped by a prostitute, and the kid grows up to be a sex god (among other things). The whole film can be read as a reaction to the victimization of black folks, with them retaking agency and being irrestably cool and sexually powerful. The child is played by the director's son, Mario Van Peebles, and the film is a landmark in black cinema. It was required viewing for the Black Panthers under Huey P. Newton, for example.

Well, the professor shows parts of the film, and after class, well...

quote:

Later that day, I had a white female student come to my office hours crying. Between picking up tissues and blowing her nose she said, "I'm doing a minor in African American Studies. How could your first images of black people be that horrible?" I told her that I understood her concerns. I went on to explain how the class was a historical look at sex on screen and as the reading for the class articulated, it was one of the first film's to show black people having sex and was important to film history. She still didn't get it. She said I had to show some positive images, otherwise it was unfair, that the other students weren't African American Studies minors so they didn't understand race politics as she did. I told her that I would bring a positive image to the next class to address her concerns. Finally, she smiled.

[...]

I also thought about a positive image of black sexuality and sex. I decided to show a clip from The Wire that shows Omar in bed with his boyfriend just after having sex, a tender moment where they kiss. Omar's character, a black, gay dude who steals from drug dealers, is a revolutionary representation of black masculinity that stands in stark contrast to SSBAS. I was excited to show it. I mean, it’s The Wire: who doesn't want to talk about The Wire?

I began class by talking briefly about learning through discomfort. The students were silent. I turned to them for questions about moments of feeling uncomfortable and how we could read these as productive. The student who came to my office raised her hand and asked, "Are we gonna talk about SSBAS."

“Yes,” I said, “but I want us to talk about any of the films that made people uncomfortable. Let’s discuss the discomfort." Her face fell. She started crying and ran out of the room. Her friend followed her. Right after she left I showed the scene with Omar. Later that day, she came to my office again, sobbing.

[...]

I went to get advice from a colleague in the department. He listened and said that during that time of the semester, students tended to get testy. He thought it was seasonal. I asked him if he ever had such a hard time with his students and he said, "No, I am an old white dude, I really think that as a young woman of color they probably just aren't afraid of you, they see you as a peer." For the record, I'm not that young but he may have been right. And here's the irony, all of the students who were upset were the feminists, the activists, and there they were, treating a woman of color professor like she wasn't an authority while treating old white dudes like they are.

The whole essay is really worth reading: https://www.salon.com/2015/10/28/i_..._this_would_be/

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Dreylad posted:

I'm interested in reading more about Good Dog/Bad Dog criticism.

Eve Sedgwick is pretty awesome.

http://www.bu.edu/honoringeve/files/2009/09/paranoid-reading-and-reparative-reading.pdf

quote:

Sometime back in the middle of the first decade of the AIDS epidemic, I was picking the brains of a friend of mine, the activist scholar Cindy Patton, about the probable natural history of HIV. This was at a time when speculation was ubiquitous about whether the virus had been deliberately engineered, or spread; whether HIV represented a plot or experiment by the U.S. military that had gotten out of control, or perhaps that was behaving exactly as it was meant to. After hearing a lot from her about the geography and economics of the global traffic in blood products, I finally, with some eagerness, asked Patton what she thought of these sinister rumors about the virus's origin. "Any of the early steps in its spread could have been either accidental or deliberate:” she said. "But I just have trouble getting interested in that. I mean, even suppose we were sure of every element of a conspiracy: that the lives of Africans and African Americans are worthless in the eyes of the United States; that gay men and drug users are held cheap where they aren't actively hated; that the military deliberately researches ways to kill noncombatants whom it sees as enemies; that people in power look calmly on the likelihood of catastrophic environmental and population changes. Supposing we were ever so sure of all those things - what would we know then that we don't already know?"

quote:

Paranoia is anticipatory: “The first imperative of paranoia is There must be no bad surprises, and indeed, the aversion to surprise seems to be what cements the intimacy between paranoia and knowledge per se, including both epistemophilia and skepticism. […] The unidirectionally future-oriented vigilance of paranoia generates paradoxically, a complex relation to temporality that burrows both backward and forward: because there must be no bad surprises, and because learning of the possibility of a bad surprise would itself constitute a bad surprise, paranoia requires that bad news be always already known” (130).

Paranoia is reflective and mimetic: “Paranoia seems to require being imitated to be understood, and it, in turn, seems to understand only imitation. Paranoia proposes both Anything you can do (to me) I can do worse, and Anything you can do (to me) I can do first–to myself. […] one understands paranoia only by oneself practicing paranoid knowing, and […] the way paranoia has of understanding anything is by imitating and embodying it” (131).

Paranoia is a strong theory: Sedgwick quotes Silvan Tomkins for a definition of “strong theory”: “Any theory of wide generality […] is capable of accounting for a wide spectrum of phenomena which appear to be very remote, one from the other, and from a common source. This is a commonly accepted criterion by which the explanatory power of any scientific theory can be evaluated” (134). Here’s Sedgwick: “As strong theory, and as a locus of reflexive mimeticism, paranoia is nothing if not teachable. The powerfully ranging and reductive force of strong theory can make tautological thinking hard to identify even as it makes it compelling and near inevitable; the result is that both writers and readers can damagingly misrecognize whether and where real conceptual work is getting done, and precisely what that work might be” (136).

Paranoia is a theory of negative affects: Positive affects are about seeking pleasure; negative affects are about avoiding or forestalling pain. This one is fairly self-explanatory.

Paranoia places its faith in exposure: “Whatever account it may give of its own motivation, paranoia is characterized by placing, in practice, an extraordinary stress on the efficacy of knowledge per se–knowledge in the form of exposure. […] paranoia for all its vaunted suspicion acts as though its work would be accomplished if only it could finally, this time, somehow get its story known. That a fully initiated listener could still remain indifferent or inimical, or might have no help to offer, is hardly treated as a possibility” (138).

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Paradise Lost is to the Bible as 50 Shades of Grey is to Twilight

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Declan MacManus posted:

working with someone else’s ip is functionally fanfiction

at any rate who gives a poo poo; turning up your nose at genre fiction only encourages people who write it to be shittier and shittier at it, and being dismissive of someone’s roots in fanfiction is silly. you gotta get all that bad writing out, might as well be about naruto or the phantom of the opera. it’s no different than writing a bunch of different genre cliches and stock characters, you just don’t delude yourself into thinking your characterz are Perfectly Original

Naomi Novik got her start writing Master & Commander fan fiction. Jodi Picoult got her start being Jodi Picoult.

Really makes you think

edit: Jodi Picoult is a very bad writer in every possible sense. She is proof that you can publish subfanfiction level work and become a millionaire by convincing your old Ivy League buddies in the publishing industry to heavily promote you

Toph Bei Fong has issued a correction as of 06:48 on Jan 17, 2021

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



uber_stoat posted:

who is this even meant for.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Loveshaft posted:

He now wants to make a film about George Washington in the style of 300. :suicide:

So, it'll a movie about a group of white slave owners fighting against a totalitarian empire? Checks out.

indigi posted:

it’s about a good school shooter stopping a bad school shooter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMgMr0JcYJ4

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Farm Frenzy posted:

bob gets completely loving obliterated every day and it just makes him more convinced that he has to tell the world that marvel movies are actually really deep when you think about it

I sometimes wonder what would happen to a guy like MovieBob if he was forced to watch and review a film like Funny Games (2007), Elephant (1989), or Force Majeure (2014). Not even something completely weird and disturbing like The Bunny Game (2010), Mordrum (2003) or Salò (1975). Just any film that has enough meat and ambiguity to it that he wouldn't be able to dismiss it outright, but neither would he be able to fall back of lazy cliches.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



So I actually quite like this sketch: it's an interesting piece of satire wherein the two characters realize that they care more about aesthetics than actual genocide, while literally fighting the communists, and this is what causes them to change their politics.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWvpvlT9pJU

But with the amount I've seen it posted and reposted with smug self-deprecation by white liberals complaining about other white people lately...

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Cold on a Cob posted:

lots of fantastic actors do poo poo roles so they can afford to take on interesting roles on films with no budget or real earning potential so i can't be too mad about that sort of thing

quote:

Michael Caine, who is an Oscar winner once said of his role in Jaws 4: The Revenge (1987) that "I have never seen it, but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific.”

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008




quote:

Hear me out, fellow BIPOC critics! Maybe every film isn’t meant for us to be the ones to critique. Maybe critics who are white should be prioritized to see & review white made/centered films first, as there may be aspects to it, that due our life experiences, we won’t get.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Doom rules













https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ldikD78vTw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ga-R6mxI5X4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmCytJPqQis

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Ghost Leviathan posted:

doom is basically tony stark being honest with himself

Close, Tony Stark is Ghostface Killah, but they have collaborated sometimes so I can see how you'd mix them up

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GtkArIh0O2E

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLLFwka3Ofw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6YW_RqTuZMw

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Spidey Super Stories was Marvel's younger reader line. Teaming up with the TV show The Electric Company, they produced limited vocabulary stories designed to help very little kids learn to enjoy reading.

It also produced some of the best out of context panels and skits.







https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4hMRRWzACpM

This is all canon, as far as I'm concerned

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Fleetwood posted:

It will be funny if he runs against Kamala

Will he drop the People's Elbow on her?

Some Guy TT posted:

https://twitter.com/andrewchen/status/1151496486028488705

maybe im reading this wrong maybe when american kids say they want to be vloggers what they really mean is that they want to be gay

I really wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid. Then, around age 6, I was informed I needed glasses. Life has basically been all downhill since then.

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Egg Moron posted:

Within a decade blackface will be in vogue again and may even be as ubiquitous as regular make up.

"Would you like standard foundation or blackface?" The makeup person will ask

"Oh, blackface please" you will say

"Great choice!" They will say

And you know it is a sign that we have healed as a nation because that make-up person? Well, they are black (played uncontroversially in the movie version of these events by none other than Reese Witherspoon, in full blackface)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMZ6zp-3oGY

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



vyelkin posted:

Weren't the "Flag Smashers" in the comics ultimately led by Literally Hitler?

Close, Flag Smasher is this guy



Hitler is Hate Monger, with his wonderfully on the nose KKK but purple outfit





Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Atrocious Joe posted:

the Joss Whedon stuff still coming out is somehow making Dollhouse even creepier

I didn't enjoy Dollhouse, but I like what it represented in the "big long overarching plot" vs. "enjoyable individual episodes" debate that was raging in TV for a bit.

I've never seen a TV show just throw every idea that had in the plot bible on screen because they knew it was never coming back, and it reconfirmed my usual "just watch the first and then last two episodes of each season, because these are the only ones that matter" strategy when it comes to "season arc with filler" shows like it. I can't imagine how painful it would have been to watch those episodes stretched out to five or more extra seasons. If the only thing a show has to offer me is shocking twists and endless foreshadowing, rather than an enjoyable watching experience, well... I could just watch the movie length feature that was all they had enough ideas for, you know?

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Some Guy TT posted:

lets remake bee movie except with beyonce said some crazy person ten years ago apparently

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JMG1Nl7uWko

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Bro Dad posted:

nah the comics, he rebooted them after very successful runs (like the avengers and x-men had wakanda tie-ins) and now they're both some of the lowest selling comics marvel puts out.



Coates is bad, but also the kind of bad where it's basically impossible for him to understand why he's bad

Cornell West has the scoop on this: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/dec/17/ta-nehisi-coates-neoliberal-black-struggle-cornel-west

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008




Given how populated the Marvel Universe is, it's likely the snap wouldn't effect a single person on Earth. Maybe a handful at most.

Unless Thanos' wish was something really specific, like, "For each inhabited planet, halve their population of intelligent civilized creatures", rather than a more generic "Halve the population of the universe"

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Some Guy TT posted:

ive been very politely trying to drop the subject and then idiots like you come in with posts like this

owning is not better than renting and the widespread belief that it is literally caused the 2008 economic crash

Ah yes, that fundamental Marxist belief that the landlords will always be with us, and that they serve an important function in the economy

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



This one is kinda cute

quote:

In Really Scent, Pepé removes his odor by locking himself in a deodorant plant so Penelope (known in this short as "Fabrette"; a black cat with an unfortunate marking) would like him (this is also the only episode that Pepé is acutely aware of his own odor, having checked the word "pew" in the dictionary). However, Penelope (who in this picture is actually trying to have a relationship with Pepé because all the male cats of New Orleans take her to be a skunk and run like blazes, but is appalled by his odor) had decided to make her own odor match her appearance and had locked herself in a Limburger cheese factory. Now more forceful and demanding, Penelope quickly corners the terrified Pepé, who, after smelling her new stench, wants nothing more than to escape the amorous female cat. Unfortunately, now she will not take "no" for an answer and proceeds to chase Pepé off into the distance, with no intention of letting him escape.

Shame about the ending, though

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Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Aglet56 posted:

i haven't seen the show, but all of that stuff happened in the book so i can't really blame the tv show too much

the book is pretty enjoyable but it definitely displays all of stephen king's excesses and tropes. like the green mile, it has both a magical negro AND a magical mentally disabled person

The Green Mile is great, because it asks the important question "If a giant black man is found alone with two dead white girls, maybe he didn't murder them but was instead trying to use his magical healing powers to save them from dying, and maybe you shouldn't be so racist and assume otherwise?"

Much like magic Anthony Hopkins bullying the bully for being gay/a transvestite/trans in Hearts in Atlantis, Stephen King movies are a force designed to bring us together. Interestingly, neither the bully nor anyone else questions why this weird old man knows all these things about the bully does when he's alone. Must be magic, right? Definitely magic.

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